Name: Elizabeth

Features: Medium length blonde hair, awesome eyes that change color from green to blue to grey, slightly overweight, stronger than most and huge feet.

Biggest Pet Peeve: When people under 110lbs. say they're fat. It offends those of us who are.

Siblings: Brothers Aaron and Cody

Age: 14...haven't updated my age in 2 years...damn...

Hair: Dishwater Blonde

Best friends: Chloe (Chuloe of the Earth), Katie, Kari (Katie's twin sister), Gewnn (Queen of the Dorks), and Sara. I'm like a bear. I only get mad when you mess with my cubs. (My cousin referred to me as a bear once when we were like eight and I didn't get enough sleep, and now she calls me Bee-Bee Bear sometimes when it's just us or a few more people.)

Favorite Bands: Evanescence, Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, Zac Brown Band, Muse, Alice Cooper, Led Zepplin, and Secondhand Serenade, Taking back Sunday, Matchbook Romance, Paramore, Saosin, 3oh!3, Hinder, Dashboard Confessional, Nickelback, The Goo Goo Dolls, The Calling, Typecast, Coldplay and 30 Seconds to Mars, NeverShoutNever!, Cute is What We Aim For, KoRn, Lady Gaga (Kill me now), Lifehouse, Poets of the Fall, Shinedown, Metallica

Favorite Sports Teams or Players: Joey Logano (NASCAR), Chicago Cubs (MLB), Columbus Blue Jackets (NHL), Misty May-Treanor (Olympics Volleyball Team), Ohio State Buckeyes (College Football) and Cleaveland Browns (NFL)

Funny Quotes By: Me and My Friends

(To the tune of 'Dancing Queen') "Unicorn!"--Shelby

"Lady man, lady man"--Shelby, pushing her boobs together simultaniously.

"You know when you say, Libby Kyah really fast, it sounds like 'Yipee-ky-ay'?"--Katie

"I'm not on Team Edward or Team Jacob, I'm on team Threesome."--Kyah

"I can resist everything except temptation."--Oscar Wilde

"Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday."--Dale Carnegie

"There are things known and things unknown. In between are the doors."--Jim Morrison

"The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense."--Tom Clancy

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."--Eleanor Roosevelt

"The man who smiles when something goes wrong is thinking of someone to blame for it."--Robert Bloch

"Behind every successful man is a surprised woman."--Maryon Pearson

Fave Movie & TV Quotes:

"Man, I fucked up." "Yeah, but you were pretty thourough"--Mystic Pizza

"I'm sorry, this isn't a brothel." "Oh, that's okay. I don't like soup."--House Bunny

"Sex, money, sex, money...cat"--Twilight

"Ain't no etch-a-sketch, this doodle can't be undid, home skillet. Your eggo is preggo."--Juno

"I'm, a bald-headed, son-of-a-bitch without hair."--Major Payne

"Chuck me."--Chuck on NBC

"Three beers and a bratt, my ass turns into a French Horn."--Two and a half men

"He's usually harder than trignomitry."--You don't mess with the Zohan

"Hey, you sleaze, my bed!"-- The Blues Brothers

"I hate Illinois Nazis."-- The Blues Brothers

"Choo-choo, asshole."--Hancock

Links--

Witnesses Album- http:///albums/vv185/alpha-beta-omega1996/Witnesses/

A Friendly Doctor Album- http:///albums/vv185/alpha-beta-omega1996/A20Friendly20Doctor/

Just One Of The Guys Album- http:///albums/vv185/alpha-beta-omega1996/Just20One20Of20The20Guys/Pick the ones that fit you (Mine are in bold)

Links for "Sibling Love"

Chapter 1:

Bella's Bridesmaid's Dress-- http:///p/AD1111/Alyce+Designs+Bridesmaid+Gown+1111.html

Esme's Wedding Dress-- http:///fashion/gown.aspx?Category=Luxe&ProductID=J00980107

Carlisle's Tux-- http:///tux922.htm

Edward's Tux-- http:///designer_tuxedos/lauren_ledric_tuxedo.htm

Bella's Joe's Crab Shack T-Shirt-- http:///attachments/images/large/JC0030C.jpg

I'm The Kind of Girl who would...

I'm the kind of girl who walks into a door and apoligizes.

I'm the kind of girl who would rather act stupid than smart.

I'm the kind of girl who would burst out laughing in a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

I'm the kind of girl who would get fired at the M&M's company for throwing out the w's.

I'm the kind of girl who would rather love a guy from a book than in real life.

I'm the kind of girl who gets drunk off soda and loves every minute of it.

A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy: No, this is fun.

Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

Girl: She gives him a big hug.

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she could live. If you would do this for a loved one copy and paste

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile

92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your asses off.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If u think rock paper scissors solves everything then put this in your profile!

If you've ever forgotten how old you are when someone asked you, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you went to sleep at around 2 am reading Twilight and/or New Moon and/or Eclipse, copy and pastes this onto your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever felt the undeniable urge to slam your head into something, whether it is another person or not copy this into your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you have ever said something twice, and when someone said something, you had no recollection of saying it either time, copy and paste to your profile.

If you have ever asked the same question 3 times in 5 minutes, copy and paste this to your profile.

Don't forget to add to this, cause if you think about it, its loads of fun.

If you have ever seen a movie or read a book so many times that you can quote it word for word, and do so at random moments, copy and past this to your profile.

If you believe some teachers are seriously prejudiced, copy an paste this in your profile.

If you have ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this into your profile.

We're best friends. You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You hurt, I hurt. You just off a bridge, damn, I'm gonna miss your dumb ass

"Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You, too? Thought I was the only one."

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tried squeeze cheese and chocolat bars, copy and paste this to your profile

If you have ever stayed up for over 40 hours continuously just because you frickin' could, copy this into your profile.

If you like chocolate as much as I do (which is ALOT), copy this in your profile.(What girl doe's not like Chocolate?)

If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't have a problem with homosexuality, copy this into your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you want to slice out Jacob Black's organs, throw them into a fire, and do a native dance around the fire, for what he did in Eclipse, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think the human identification thing when you log in to fan fiction is annoying,But at the same time funny, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile (mabye...)

If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, etc, and the people who kill the animals don't use the meat, copy and paste this into your profile

Drugs are bad news. Spread the word.Too many people are on crack. If you're not, copy this into your bio.

Too many people smoke marijuana. If you don't, copy this into your profile.

If you cried when Fred Weasley died ((in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows)), and not afraid to admit it, copy, paste this on your profile, and add your name to the list: Littlewhisker, Patronus Charm, The Dawn Is Breaking,MangoTango450 OMG he die's!).

If you like animals, give one a home if you can. If you already have or can't but want to spread the word, copy this into your profile

If you think that Global Warming is real, and that it should be dealt with, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile

If you have ever read a 250 pg + book in less than one day, copy and paste this into your profile(Try 450 pg + book in less then one day)For some reason i don't think i should be proud of that.

If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile (It hurts. BAD!)

People are like slinkies, basically useless; and yet it's so amusing to watch them fall down stairs.

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: Queen S of Randomness 016, Queen B of Randomness 016, AnimieKittyCaffe, The Gypsy Pirate Queen, That Bloody Demon, The Astrology Nerd, Shadow929, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Yavie Aelienel, Hyperactively Bored, Spymaster E, Shanny-Boo, Gem W, Brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, Bara-Minomoto, Em Quagmire, Buffy The Mary-Sue Slayer, Random Little Writer, SamanthaFantasyFan, EdwardAddict, Supergirrl, Elemental-ANimal, Mother Nature's Daughter, Schmerg_The_Impaler, GinnyPotter808, clumsywerewolf2438, DontCallMeNymphadora,XVampWitchCatX,alpha-beta-omega1996,

Signs you live in 2008

1. You are on your computer everyday

2. You are more inside, than out.

4. You are on this site often.

5. As you read this, you keep nodding and smiling.

6. You were too busy, reading, nodding, and of course smiling, that you didn't notice there wasn't a number three.

7. You looked back to see if there was a number three.

8. You feel a bit stupid.

9. You think this is funny.

10. You want to copy this in your profile, right now - feel free.

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't
have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that
way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don 't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

Make your mother proud, dont smoke pot or stop breathing because Abrocrombie and Fitch tell you its not cool to breath.

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Twilight, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone.: Iheartjake1220, FaerieRose13, Dancer4Life15,Marigold Winters, SparklingTopazEyes, alpha-omega1996

Okay these are just a bunch of stereotypes...you've seen this before...

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm/my parents ATHEIST so I/they MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.

I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART & CLASSICAL MUSIC, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fing them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that’s how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO. (NO ON PROP 8! And no, actually, I'm heterosexual.)
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.

I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too. (FYI, I don't do that.)
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics/Manga, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirts (It's actually called a kilt)
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.('nother li'l note from moi -pfft. I wish!)
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyberspace sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion (Well, I'm conservative and against abortion, so...that one's true.)
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick. (It's true, I am a witch. If you replace the 'w' with a 'b' then yeah, totally.)
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian

I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK , so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I like FIRE so I must be an arsonist.
I play VIDEO GAMES so I MUST be a LOSER.
I'm a TOMBOY so I MUST be a homosexual that's looking for attention.
I like to READ, so I MUST have a lot of free time

I TRY so I MUST be an over-acheiver.
I DO STUDENT GOVERMENT so I MUST be a class-act suck-up.
I Love SHOPPING so I must be rich. I'm an OG so I must be Mexican.
I'm not a SOUPCAN, so YOU CAN'T LABEL ME!
I LIKE TO SING so I MUST be some "pop star".
I LIKE TO LOOK GOOD so I MUST be insecure.
I LIKE TO READ so I MUST have no life.
I TALK TO BOYS so I MUST be a slut.
I'm A WRITER so I MUST be crazy.
I LIKE SCHOOL so I MUST be a loser.
I'm an HONEST PERSON, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm an ACTRESS so I MUST be a liar.
I LIKE A "LOSER" so I MUST be one too.
I WEAR MAKEUP so I MUST be a slut.
I DON'T WEAR MAKEUP so I MUST "think i'm all that".
I'm TALENTED so I MUST be a conceited show-off.
I ACT DIFFERENT so I MUST be a show-off.
I DON'T DO FASHION so I MUST be poor.
I HAVE NO FACEBOOK so I MUST have no friends.

I'm NOT POPULAR so I MUST have no life.
I'm POPULAR so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm FRIENDLY so I MUST be fake.
I don't buy DESIGNER CLOTHES, therefore I MUST be poor.
My parents are DIVORCED/NEVER GOT MARRIED, therefore I MUST be mentally unstable.

Stereotypes suck! Copy, paste & add. Bold the ones that describe you.

If you have ever choked on air (or any other substance you thought impossible to choke on), copy this in your profile.

I'm bored...If you’re bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...

If you've ever got into an argument with a vampire in a haunted house, copy and paste this to your profile.

You know you live in 2009 when...

1. You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.
2. You haven’t played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is that they don't have AIM/LiveJournal/MySpace.
4. You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the TV.
6. Your evening activity is sitting at the computer.
you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.
8. You read this list, and keep nodding and smiling.
9. You think about how stupid you are for reading this.
10. You were too busy to notice number five.
11. You actually scrolled back up to check if there was a number five.
12. And now you're laughing at your stupidity.
13. Put this in your pro if you fell for it. You know you did.

Miss

I'm a girl so I'm probably cruel

I'm a lady so I'm probably irrational

I'm a women so I'm probably crazy

I'm a female so I'm probably sexy

Miss or Ms. "Whatever".Girls rule,Boys drool.

All of the above put this in your pro.

Having the love of you're life say "we can still be friends" is like having you're dog die and your mother saying you can still keep it.

Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for
breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.

Girls can do anything guys can do, and we do it in heels.

Men who dress as women can do anything boys can do while wearing heels and looking like a girl. Imagine the stress they are under!(I had to be fair and put this here to ;-)

One fine day in the middle of the night, Two dead boys got up to fight. Back-to-back they faced one another, Drew their swords and shot each other. One was blind and the other couldn't see, So they chose a dummy for a referee. A blind man went to see fair play, A dumb man went to shout "hooray!" A deaf policeman heard the noise, And came and shot the two dead boys. A paralysed donkey walking by, Kicked the copper in the eye, Sent him through a rubber wall, Into a dry ditch and drowned them all. (If you don't believe this lie is true, Ask the blind man -- he saw it too!)

'Never Argue With A Woman'

One morning, the husband returns the boat to their lakeside cottage after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap.

Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out.

She motors out a short distance, anchors, puts her feet up, and begins to read her book. The peace and solitude are magnificent.

Along comes a Fish and Game Warden in his boat.

He pulls up alongside the woman and says, 'Good morning, Ma'am.What are you doing?'

'Reading a book,' she replies, (thinking, 'Isn't that obvious?').

'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' he informs her.

'I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading.'

'Yes, but I see you have all the equipment.

For all I know you could startat any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up.'

'If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault,' says the woman.

'But I haven't even touched you,' says the Game Warden.

"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."

'Have a nice day ma'am,' and he left.

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads.
It's likely she can also think

LADIES don't start fights,we FINISH them.

A good girl is a bad girl whos never gotten caught.

"Do you remember when Pluto was a planet, yeah, those were the days."

Who doesn't love comebacks that make the other person sound stupid?

Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead.
Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow.
Do not walk beside me, either.
Just leave me the heck alone.

Some Great Answers to That Stupid Question:
"Why aren't you married yet?"

You haven't asked yet. I was hoping to do something meaningful with my life. What? And spoil my great sex life? Because I just love hearing this question. Just lucky, I guess. My fiance is awaiting his/her parole. I'm waiting until I get to be your age. It didn't seem worth a blood test. I already have enough laundry to do, thank you. Because I think it would take all the spontaneity out of dating. I'd have to forfeit my billion dollar trust fund. They just opened a great singles bar on my block. What? And lose all the money I've invested in running personal ads? We really want to, but my lover's spouse just won't go for it. I don't want to have to support another person on my paycheck. Why aren't you thin? I'm married to my career, although recently we have been considering a trial separation. (For Single Mothers) Because having a husband and a child would be redundant.

Man "Haven't we met before?"
Woman "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."

Man "Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

Man "Is this seat empty?"
Woman "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."

Man "So, wanna go back to my place ?"
Woman "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

Man "Your place or mine?"
Woman "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."

Man "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman "It's in the phone book."

Man "But I don't know your name."
Woman "That's in the phone book too."

Man "So what do you do for a living?"
Woman "I'm a female impersonator."

Man "What sign were you born under?"
Woman "No Parking."

Man "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Woman "Do not Enter"

Man "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Woman "Unfertilized"

Man "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason"
Woman "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"

Man "I'm here to fulfill your every sexual fantasy."
Woman "You mean you've got both a donkey and a Great Dane?"

Man "I know how to please a woman."
Woman "Then please leave me alone."

Man "I want to give myself to you."
Woman "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

Man "I can tell that you want me."
Woman "Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave."

Man "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy
Woman "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing."

Man "Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots?"
Woman "Sorry, I don't date outside my species.."

Man "Your body is like a temple."
Woman "Sorry, there are no services today."

Man "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman "Good! Let's start with your bank account."

Man "I would go to the end of the world for you."
Woman "Yes, but would you stay there?

If you are a serial killer, GET THE HECK AWAY FROM ME. If you are a cereal killer,GET THE HECK AWAY FROM MY CHERRIOS.

"Some see the glass half full, some see it half empty. Me? i just want to know who the hell is drinking my damn soda"

¸.•´¸•´¨) ¸.•¨) ¸.•´¸.•´¨) ¸.•¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•´~pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has survived, DIED, or is living with cancer

Reasons why girls are the best

1.We got off the Titanic first

2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.

3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.

4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.

5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.

6. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game.

7. Taxis stop for us.

8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.

9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.

10. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point).

11. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.

12. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.

13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.

14. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.

15. We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.

16. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.

17. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.

18. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.

19. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.

20. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.

21. We don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.

22. We have the ability to dress ourselves.

23. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.

24. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.

25. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.

26. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.

27. We'll never regret piercing our ears.

28. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

29. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark.

You're a 90's kid if:

You can finish this 'ice ice _'
You remember watching Doug, Ren & Stimpy, Pinky and the Brain, Bobby's World, Felix the cat, The Tick...AAAAAAAH Real Monsters!
You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"
You just cant resist finishing this . . . "Iiiiiiin west philidelphia born and raised . . ."
You remember TGIF, Step by Step, Family Matters, Dinosaurs, and Boy Meets World.
You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.
You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school. (I got that for Christmas '07 as a joke. I still play it when I'm not on Fanfiction)
You remember reading "Goosebumps"(ok maybe I still read these)
You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.
You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence . . . not
If you remember seeing hot tub bubbles make bubbly sounds before every music video on VH1.
when everything was settled by rock paper scissors..or bubble gum bubble gum in a dish...eeny meeny miney mo...and even better daddy had a donkey inky binky bonky.
You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time.
"Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?" was both a game and a TV game show.
Captain Planet. He's a Hero.
You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green ranger, were meant to be together.
You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genisis became popular.
You always wanted to send in a tape to America's Funniest Home Videos . . . but never taped anything funny.
You remember watching Home Alone 1, 2 , and 3 . . . and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"
You remember watching The Magic School Bus, Wishbone, and Reading Rainbow on PBS.
You remember when Yo-Yos were cool.
You remember those Where's Waldo books.
You remember eating Warheads.
You remember watching the 1st Batman, Aladdin, Ninja Turtles, and 3 Ninjas movies.
You remember Ring Pops.
You remember drinking Surge, and Tang.
If you remember when every thing was "da BOMB!"
When they made the new lunchables so that you could make pizza AND tacos.
You remember boom boxes vs. cd players.
Making those little paper cootie-catcher things, and then predicting your life with them.
You played and/or collected "Pogs"
You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet, or Nano and brought it everywhere.
. . . Furbies
Saved By The Bell was the coolest show ever!
You haven't always had a computer, and it was cool to have the internet.
And Windows 95 was the best.
You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Power Rangers, and Ninja Turtles.
Michael Jordan was a king.
YIKES pencils and erasers were the stuff!
All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.
You remember when the new Beanie Babies and Talking Elmo were always sold out.
You collected those Beanie Babies.
Mortal Kombat was awesome--the game and the movie
Carebears
Gak was the coolest stuff invented.
Lambchop's song never ended.
The old dollar bills.
Silver dollars, which were cool to have.
You remember a time before the WB.
You collected all the Troll dolls
You had to read Weekly Reader's in class.
If you even know what an original walkman is.
You remember wanting to sit on the orange Nickelodeon couch.
You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"
You know the Macarena by heart.
"Talk to the hand" . . . enough said
You always said, "Then why don't you marry it?!"
You remember trying to collect all 150 original pokemon cards but never could and if you did you thought you were all that!
You remember Highlight's magazine.
You went to McDonald's to play in the playplace.
You remember playing on merry go rounds at the playground.
Before the MySpace frenzy . . .
Before the Internet & text messaging . . .
Before Sidekicks & iPods . . .
Before MIKE JONES . . .
Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX . . .
Before Spongebob . . .
Back when you put off the 5 hours of homework you had every night.
When light up sneakers were cool.
When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.
When gas was 0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was The new thing.
When we recorded stuff on VCRs.
When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off of our walkmans.
When gameboy was a brick.
You did MASH to figure out your future
When you weren't cool unless you had a Starter jacket.
Way back.

If what most people call funny you call creepy, copy and paste this into your profile.

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...(ya know he has a point)
Post this on your profile if you hate racism

If you think you should be able to watch what you want on TV without being called immature, copy and paste this in your profile.(Oh yea!!)

Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile.

If you're disgusted by the way most teenagers are acting nowadays, then copy and paste this into your profile.((beep) yes!)

If you'd rather get hammered by King Dedede than get hammered by alcohol, put this in your profile and add your name to the list: Lady Lilane, Meta Knight LOVER, Chuloe-Marie95

If you easily finish one novel a day... copy and paste this into your profile.(I totally would if I didn't have so many other things to do)

If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/someone else, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you want to see the world someday, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

If you hate racism,copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think that Pokemon is cool, copy this into your profile.

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself (i find that i am a very tough opponent). So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.

It's obvious that flamers are really just immature people with nothing better to do. If you're mature enough to take a flame, ignore the flamer, and repress the urge to strike back, then copy and paste this in your profile, and add your name to the list: RoyalFanatic, Yoshizilla, Luigi Rules 512, Lady Lilane, Meta Knight LOVER, Chuloe-Marie1995, alpha-beta-omega1996

98 percent of the internet population has a MySpace. If you're part of the 2 percent that can resist stupid fads, copy and paste this into your profile.

That same 98 would probably turn suicidal if Myspace was down for 48 hours. If you're part of the 2 that would laugh their butts off at their pain, copy and paste this into your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, so weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

If you are obsessed with something considered childish for someone your age, copy this into your profile.

If you think those kids should just give up and let Lucky have his cereal back, copy this into your profile.

If you are addicted to Fan-Fiction, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile.

If you think the school week is way too long and weekends are way too short, copy this onto your profile.(YES! I get weekends!)

If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you hunt through people's profiles to find copy and paste things, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever walked into a wall, door, table, chair, or other large solid object even when it was in plain sight, copy and paste this in your profile.(This usually occurs when I don't have my glasses or my contacts in)

If you love all the "copy and paste this into your profile" sentences...COPY AND PASTE THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you have the most RANDOM dreams, copy this.

93 percent of teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you love fanfiction friends, copy and paste this into yourprofile

If someone started staring at you for no reason and you didn't know why, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think life would be dull and dreary without technology, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, post this in your profile.(This usually occurs when I'm reading people's funny fan fics)

If you think its AWESOME for people to review your stories, add your name to this list: Mr. Pichu, Mind Seeker, Hikaru 2009, Meta Knight LOVER, Chuloe-Marie1995, alpha-beta-omega1996

I love this one!! If you can read this, your not stupid!!

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdatnrd waht I was rdanieg.
The phaomneal pwoer of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at
Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in what oredr the ltters in a
wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is that the first and last ltteer be
in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll
raed it wouthit a porbelm. This is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not
raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig, huh?
Yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!
If you can raed this, psas it on and cpoy and pstae tihs itno yuor porlife!

My Bucket List!

1.) Skydive
2.) Write a book
3.) Actually get a deer when I go hunting
4.) Break 1000 reviews on one of my stories
5.) Stay up for three days straight
6.) Actually get someone to ask me out
7.) Hold a poisonus snake
8.) Learn to drive standard