Mortality and Second Chances

By: doctorrosetyler

Summary: (Prequel to Chances Come in Threes) Their life wasn't without pain; the universe wasn't kind to them. But fate did love them more than some. Fate gave them a second chance, and then a third. 10.5/Rose and a snippet of 11/Rose.

Disclaimer: If I owned Doctor Who I wouldn't need this site.

After that wonderfully horrible day on the beach, her life really began.

The human Doctor was exactly as he said he was. He was the Time Lord man stuck in a human body, made to take the pain of genocide that the first Doctor couldn't handle. Rose mourned the months it took her to realize that.

It was one evening, when the Doctor was making supper for them (something he insisted on doing, saying he wanted the "full human experience") that she noticed it. He leaned over the stovetop, his lip caught between his teeth in concentration, and reached into his pocket. She was shocked when he pulled out an actual sonic screwdriver. He had rebuilt one. And he hadn't told her.

When they were traveling together, he told her everything. Well, not everything he knew, but things as big as the sonic were daily news. He would have never kept something like that from her, and it certainly would never occur to him not to tell her.

She was beginning to lose him. Her own insecurities were pushing him away, and from all he had shown her he was the same man. He had the same thoughts, feelings, everything. He told her every day that he loved her. So why was she being such an idiot? She was repeating the same mistakes that had put them in this situation to begin with, only this time it was her holding them back. If she lost him now, she would have nobody to blame but herself.

She stood up from her stool and walked to where he was standing, still bent over the stove and trying the various settings on his new screwdriver. She felt the tears coming to her eyes, spilling over down her cheeks. She couldn't lose him, not now. After all they had been through together, the idea of having this opportunity and letting it pass was too much to bear. She had thrown everything she was, her entire being, into this man. It didn't matter if he was human or Time Lord. He was her Doctor, and she was his Rose.

He turned to her at the sound of the small sob escaping her throat, a look of concern in his eyes.

"Rose, what's wrong?" he said, as if he didn't know that they were falling apart. He asked her this as if things were the same as they had been before the void, because he couldn't bear to believe that they weren't. He couldn't live with the thought that she didn't love him anymore.

She sank into his arms, sobbing and apologizing and making his shirt soggy with tears. She wrapped her arms around his waist and pulled him close, as if he were going to run away at any moment. "Don't leave me, Doctor" she sobbed.

He wrapped his arms tight around her, burying his head in her hair. "I'll never leave you, you know that. I came here to spend this life with you." He said.

She looked up at him then, tears still falling from her eyes. "No, I mean this" she gestured to the screwdriver "Don't let us grow apart. I don't want to be just best friends living together because we can't seem to make being in love work. I want to be with you. I'm ready to do this, if you'll still have me."

He sighed in relief, almost slumping in her arms. She felt the weight lift off of him. "You see me now, don't you? It's really me. You finally found me in all this lumpy human."

She felt her tears dry up. "No, Doctor. I knew you were there. I found me. I was off dreaming of two hearts when they were right here in front of me, but merged into one. I'm so sorry. I love you so, so much. It just took me a while to realize that you hadn't left me behind."

He smiled and, deciding that the words had been said, pressed his lips to hers. Dinner was forgotten (luckily he hadn't actually turned the stove on) as they kissed their way to the bedroom.

Less than a year later, they were married. They bought a house, with carpets and a mortgage.

It wasn't two months after their wedding that Rose began to feel a bit off. She couldn't keep food down in the mornings, her feet were swollen, and her pants wouldn't fit her anymore. She went to the Doctor, afraid to hope that her theory was correct. He was in the bedroom, laying on their king sized bed, with formulas strewn around him. She leaned against the bedpost.

"Doctor…I, um…I think I have something to tell you. Well, it may be something. It might also be nothing. Could be my imagination, but you know-" he cut her off with a kiss.

"Dear, you're rambling again." He said, with a lopsided grin.

She took a deep breath and just…said it. "Doctor, I think I'm pregnant."

He dropped his papers immediately, putting both hands on her stomach gently, as if he could tell just by touching her. He moved his head so his cheek brushed her belly, hoping and praying that she was right. He wanted nothing more than to be a father again, as long as Rose was the mother of his children.

He ran to the pharmacy to get a pregnancy test, practically breaking speed records to get back to her. She took the test. It was positive.

They had five children over the course of their lives, all of which they named after people they met on their travels, except for their youngest. His name was Gallifrey. They spent their lives together. Birthdays, holidays, everything.

Her mother died when she was 43. Rose spent the next few years adjusting to life without her mum, and a small fear crept into her heart. Their forever wasn't really forever. She would look at the wrinkles appearing on her husband's face and worry just a bit over how much longer this perfect life could last. Her father died four years later. That loss affected the Doctor even more than it did her, and they spent a good week alone in their room, making love like it would be their last days.

Their kids went off to college, and then returned home to live in the bigger house that they had bought. Their three daughters married and lived in one wing with their husbands and children, their two sons did the same with their families. They knew that it wouldn't last forever.

When he was 87 and she was 83, the outbreak came.

They tried escaping it, but it went airborne. People were dying left and right and they were just too old- their bodies were too tired to fight the infection. They lay in that bed, the one that they had bought all those years ago. Both of them were infected. Both of them were dying.

Their eldest granddaughter, Josephine, was looking after them on that day. Rose was in her pink nightgown, the one she had worn for years. She hadn't been able to eat for several days. Nothing would stay down long enough. She knew she didn't have much time left. She shifted closer to her husband, taking his hand in hers. He was in a bit better condition than she was, but the fever raged in his body as well, his tired face turned to hers. He tried to smile, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. Rose felt tears sliding down her wrinkled cheeks.

Forever was going to end today.

She pulled his hand to her lips, almost surprised at how wrinkled and old their hands were. The bones seemed to pop out of thin and pale skin, and she felt the fear creep deeper into her soul.

It wasn't death she feared at all. It was the end of their forever. This perfect life, the adventure that he could never have- was coming to a close. She knew they would meet in heaven, but she would miss the world. The people, places, everything that they loved would be dearly missed. She wanted to start over, take back the time that she had wasted those first few months. She wanted to take back the wasted years she had spent with him, before he became human.

"Doctor" she said, her voice small and weak.

His eyes met hers. "What's wrong?" he asked, worry clouding his face. (It was old, his hair was white and the glasses on his nose were no longer there just to make him sexy. But she still saw the 'sort of brown' handsome face that she had fallen in love with.)

"I don't have long. I can tell." He went to interrupt her, tears burning their way down his face, but she silenced him with a look, just as she always had. "I love you more than anything in this world and all the parallel ones. Thank you for giving me this life. Forever was...beautiful. I just wish it could have been longer. If you survive this, just know…you were fantastic." A small sob escaped him at her words, his hand shaking as it cupped her withered cheek. She continued. "And you know what? So was I." He pulled her closer to him, pleading with his eyes to turn back the clock, to take away this journey's end.

She felt her heart constrict in her chest. She took a deep breath, trying to smile for him. Pain erupted in her body as the heart monitor began a long beep.

The last thing she saw was the pain in his eyes as he begged her not to go.

Or, at least, it should have been the last thing she saw. As the world should have been going black, it turned gold. It was so bright and painful. She screamed, but no sound came out of her mouth. She felt the pricks of light in the back of her eyes and felt an intense surge of energy throughout her entire being. She dissolved into the pain, and finally, mercifully, the world went black.

She awoke. That was the first thing wrong. She awoke in the same bed that she had been in when she died, or at least she was sure she had died. She took stock of her body, noticing that she was young again. There were no wrinkles in her hands; her hair was blonde- not grey. Had the universe decided to give them another chance? A second- second chance? She cried with relief, before jumping out of bed. Her heart dropped as she noticed the medicine bottle on the bed. If she had been sent back in time, then that shouldn't be there. Neither should the wires attached to her skin. She turned at the sound of a surprised sob.

Her husband, as old as she had left him, was still in their bed. He was still dying.

She pulled the wires off of her, crawling on the bed to his side and taking his frail hand in her new one. "I died." She said.

He shook his head, a small smile appearing on his face. "No. You regenerated." He said, gripping her hand tighter.

She sat back on her heels, afraid of what that meant. Slowly, ever so slowly, she reached her hand up to her chest. On her left was a heartbeat, strong and steady. She put her other hand on her right side- the same place she had often rested her head on her Time Lord Doctor's chest. Another heartbeat met her touch. Tears rushed down her cheeks. "How did this happen? I'm…I'm human. Humans don't regenerate."

His smile faded. "I…you…" his voice was interrupted by a wet cough. "You are the Bad Wolf. And you are brilliant." He said, after recovering.

"Does this mean that you'll regenerate too?" she asked. He shook his head.

"No. I've only got this one. I'm fully human. No Bad Wolf in me." She grabbed his hand gently, cradling it to her chest.

"You have to. You can't leave me to live forever without you. You can't!"

He gripped her hand with the strength that she remembered from his youth. It was strange how becoming young again had made her see how old he was. She could feel the earth spinning and time passing; most specifically his time. So this is what the Doctor couldn't stand about her humanity. He could feel her time leaving her as quickly as it came. "I won't. I'm still alive, just a universe away. I'll come for you. Or you can come for me. Find me again, Rose. I can't live forever without you either."

It was the first time in years that either of them had mentioned the other him- the man that was him but not.

"You mean…leave our family? Leave you behind to be with…you? It seems wrong! You've surely regenerated by now, forgotten me! You can't possibly still be in love with me. Not the way this you is." She protested, fear of leaving him eating her inside, the way that the cruel world was taking his life from him every second.

He pulled her in for an embrace and she cried into his flannel pajamas. She had given those to him for their 60th anniversary. Would they really never have a 61st? "No, Rose. I mean go find me. It doesn't matter whether I'm human or Time Lord, I will always be in love with you. I know that this domestic lifestyle drove you mad. I have known for years. You want the adventure, you want me again. And I want you again. The other me- hasn't had this. I haven't seen your face or even kissed you properly. This is what the universe intended. This was the test that I didn't pass."

She met his ancient eyes, feeling the pain that he had been trying to avoid all those years ago. She was going to lose this man that had been her life. She had truly loved him, and he was going to die in front of her very eyes. She wished more than anything that she could die with him.

"What test?" she asked.

There was another coughing fit and a drink of water before he could answer her. "To love you and trust in that love. I couldn't let you love me back because I would lose you in the end. I didn't expect that the universe would reward me by this. You have to find me. I'm too blind to see my mistakes. I think I've done what's best. Please, Rose. Will you find me and spend forever with me?"

She cried harder, kissing his old lips and promising her new forever to this dying man. "Yes, my love. I'll love you and be with you forever."

He pulled her in, cuddling her to his body the way he had when he was young. "Then I'll wait for you in paradise. I'll wait for us." And he fell into a deep sleep.

It was the last sleep he would ever have.

At 5:30 in the morning, his heart stopped. The human Doctor died. Rose stayed in the bed with him for hours, refusing to let them take him- screaming at him to regenerate. She prayed to every God that she knew to bring him back to her. She cried and begged and went into hysteria. His hand grew cold in her grasp, but she still begged the universe to bring him back to her.

It was her youngest granddaughter, only four years old, who brought her back. The little girl padded into the room, putting her small hand on her grandmother's shoulders.

"Rosie. Don't be sad." She said.

Rose turned to her and pulled her into a desperate embrace. "I love him, Eliana. I can't be happy when he is gone."

Eliana patted her grandmother's head. "But he's still alive. He said so. You just have to find him."

Rose pulled back, staring wide eyed at the child. The Doctor's words echoed in her mind, her promise to find him and love him forever. She picked up her grandchild and stood. Casting one last glance at her husband's body, she walked out of her bedroom. Her eyes focused and jaw set in determination, she began to pack her house.

"Then I'd best start looking, shouldn't I?"

They had a funeral for herself and the Doctor. She packed up her house and family and moved them to Norway. She built a large house on Bad Wolf Bay. From her bedroom window, she could see the spot they had stood as she kissed her human Doctor.

Her family lived and died, Eliana was the only other one to share somewhat of her lifespan. She believed it was a bit of leftover regeneration energy, as she seemed to age only one year to everyone else's two years. She lived in that white house on the beach, with her children and her children's children and her children's-children's children. She lived and loved and grieved and waited. Her Doctor would return to her.

She never stopped trying to build a machine to get her through the void, but she just wasn't as clever as he was. In her large basement lab, she spent her sleepless nights. During the day she cared for her family, all which remained of their life together. She kept bags ready to pack when he returned to her.

And one cold day, he did.

Her Doctor came through the void to bring her home. He wasn't the same, but neither was she. A young, old woman and a floppy haired man with a bowtie were given a gift by the universe. A third chance. And she promised him forever one more time.

He gladly accepted.

A/N: So, what did you think? The last bit doesn't make much sense unless you have read Chances Come In Threes.

Reviews are the amateur fan fiction writer's candy!

Thanks,

Doctorrosetyler