A young man sits in his 'lair', as he often refers to it. He is sixteen years of age, and is quite a friendly person. Perhaps you'd like to guess his name? He'd love you to get it right.
Enter name: Seymour Buttz.
Haha. Nice try. The boy applaudes your humour and asks you to try again.
Enter name: Jay Scott
His face lights up. That is his name!
You are Jay Scott. Your many interests include hitting idiots in the face, playing bass guitar, and hitting idiots in the face with a bass guitar. You like rock music, and LOVE punk rock.
Jay: Examine room
You casually glance around your lair. On one wall, there is a section dedicated to your musical idols - Mike Dirnt, Dave Grohl and the entirety of Fall Out Boy.
Among the posters, however, is one of your favourite pictures, and by far the most important - a black and white adaptation of a summer photo taken of your girlfriend in America. You tear up slightly and have to look away. The pain is sometimes too much, remembering that some idiot put the Atlantic ocean between you and your love.
Jay: Pirouette off the handle
You don't think your quite that desperate yet...
Jay: Examine game rack.
Ah yes, you almost forgot your other great passion - the desktop computer. You had a habit of changing the hardware yourself - or "manually updating the hardware". Many games are stacked by your contraption, some new, some classics, and some unheard but unrivalled games.
Jay: Piss on your manual desktop.
"NO FUCKING WAY!"
Sorry?
"You always do this! Put stupid ideas into my head!"
Ah yes. You also seem to have an uncanny knack for casually breaking the fourth wall at will.
"I CAN hear you."
Right, sorry.
"Why... Why must I put up with an insufferable creator..."
Hey, I can be helpful!
"At times..."
Look, let's just get on with this ok?
"Yeah, yeah..."
Jay: Check PesterChum.
You fire up your computer, the familiar desktop wallpaper of the Whovian appearing - the launch poster for Series 8. You loved David Tennant as the Doctor the best, but you have confidence that the new Doctor will-
Oh. Someone appears to be pestering you.
CHATLOG
MissIndiana started pestering PunkishScotsman
MI: Hey honey bunch of oats!
MI: ok that was TERRIBLE.
PS: Let's stick with you being "gorgeous" and me being "handsome"
MI: *blush* I can live with that.
MI: Hey handsome PS: Hey gorgeous ;P MI: xD MI: OH GOD I forgot the time difference it's 5 over here but you're still in school shit I'm sorry...
PS: Honey?
PS: it's Saturday.
MI: ... I knew that...
PS: surely if it was a weekday youd remember being at school?
MI: uh...
PS: Something wrong?
MI: I... I've been really ill the past few days. I'm curled up over my laptop watching Angel Beats PS: NOO babe are you ok?
MI: :) I'll be fine. It's getting better now. Besides, I'm at the bit where Hinata starts being all smexy :3 PS: one thing I hate - anime guys are wayyyy hotter than me :L MI: NOT TRUE MI: *SLAP*
MI: BAD BOYFRIEND! BAD!
PS: Haha thanks... I think.
MI: besides I love you no matter how you look :*
PS: :') I love you too. Thanks gorgeous xxx MI: I'm always here for you :)
MI: unless I'm asleep.
MI: or eating...
MI: or out with friends...
PS: haha you know I don't mind I'm just glad we can still talk.
MI: ye, that whole kerfuffle with your mom...
PS: hehe. Kerfuffle.
MI: xD oh have you heard from BA? He keeps blinking on and offline.
PS: Ye, his broadbands on the fritz. He told me to tell you that he'd send you the program as soon as he could.
MI: you mean that SBURB game? Sweet!
PS: He is a brilliant... Hack. MI: ... Pffffffft xD PS: let's hope he never sees that xD.
MI: Darnit :'( dads calling me for tea and we're going out... Ttyl?
PS: Course. When will you be back? And your dads taking you out while your ill?
MI: about 7 your time, and the worst of it's passed. Mainly just migraines and a sore throat PS: 11? That's late for you. And if your sure...
MI: movie night, dads taking me to the new x-men movie.
PS: IT'S AMAZING. Just... Blink. BLINK.
MI: o.O ok... Anyway, I'll ttys love you!
PS: Love you too have fun!
MissIndiana ceased pestering PunkishScotsman.
Jay: Pester BA!
It appears BA had no progress with fixing his broadband. Shit.
Jay: Pester BF!
CHATLOG
PunkishScotsman started pestering BendrownedFanatic.
PS: That's really still your username?
BF: Hey Jay! And duh!
PS: XD you got the game yet?
BF: the game?
PS: SBURB BF: Not yet. It's due today though! I can't wait!
PS: Awesome! Remind me how we connect to each other and what order?
BF: I'll run the Host server, you'll be the client. Once you connect to me, BA will connect to you, MI will connect to him, and I'll connect to MI.
PS: Got it. One more thing before I go.
BF: ?
PS: THE GAME BF: SON OF A BITCH!
PunkishScotsman ceased pestering BendrownedFanatic
Jay: Revel in your victory over BF
You have done it once again - the plague of all Danosaurs has struck BF, and she has experienced yet another defeat at your hands. If someone wasn't a Danosaur, they simply wouldn't understand the true irony of The Game.
Jay: ROCK THIS MOTHERFUCKING JOINT
An excellent plan. You plug in your bass, turn on your cd player, and start strumming along to 'Thanks For The Memories', one of your favourite F.O.B. songs.
Jay: SING ALONG LIKE THERE'S NO TOMORROW BECAUSE IT WAS CAUSED BY A METEOR SHOWER THAT WILL NEVER OCCUR.
Not many get to hear you sing. You aren't very tuneful - heck, you ain't no SuBo. But those who have heard you have decided your vocal talent suits punk rock perfectly - tuneful enough to sing the right key, yet rough around the edges to give the feel of true grit, true emotion and ultimately, true rock.
Jay: Surf the net!
It's about time! You wondered when you'd get to sit on your lazy ass and do fuck all on the web!
You open the browser and decide to find some info on SBURB. A little knowledge could come in handy for future reference.
Whilst searching, you come across a strange walkthrough - a walkthrough written by one Rose Lalonde...