Name: Mistletien Maddox_

Nicknames: Mist, M, Allit(though he dislikes it greatly)_

Age: 17_

Sex: Male_

Nationality: African American_

Romantic Preference: straight_

Lust or Love: Love_

Skill Set: A superb boxer_

Appearance: Mist is a young African-American boy with hazel skin and high, prominent cheek bones. He's tall, maybe 6'5 with a slight muscular build. He has a oval head with long brown dreadlocks that falls all over the place with it in his eyes. His eyes are usually half lidded with a bored look written all over his face. Though his dreads are blocking it, he has diamond earring in his right ear. He usually wears a solid black button down, short sleeved shirt that has its right arm torn off. The dark short sleeve shirt also hangs over faded baggy jeans._

Family: Tayshawn(Alive, Brother) and Tammie(Dead, Mother)_

History: Before the Zombie Apocalypse, Mist was a renowned up and coming boxer for a local gym in the city of Cleveland Ohio. He fought for a living, solved problems that NEEDED to be fixed and he seemed to be a rather problem child. Not that he actually saw it himself, but he was told he was depressed...he guessed. Guessed because he always had a pretty lower rate of enthusiasm and his eyes were always half lidded, but life seemed okay for him. It was besides the point, though. When he got older, he had to give his dream of becoming one of the world greatest boxers to catch up on his studies. And that's what he did, but never did he just straight give up his passion...he found a simple way to continue fighting: "Accidently" cause problems. So yeah...life was as it suppose to be for him._

Personality: He brooding, tired all the time and despondent to most situation. He speaks, but rarely due to the fact that its had for him to convey most of his deeper feelings for the world. He isn't a leader at all and this is a trait he fails to have. He's a more of a soldier with the only duty to fight and be loyal. The only real time he will be all belligerent is when someone would notice that his name beginning sounded the same and start calling him Allit(Short for alliteration)._

Weapon: Bladed spike knuckles with large curved blades on the outer side of the hands and large spikes on the knuckles_

Initial: Just his skills as a boxer: Being quick-

Intermediate: big orange boxing gloves filled with cement that seems to help with his training_

Main: His bladed spike knuckles that were stolen from him. It was a gift from his father_

Weakness: Though his demeanor, he is deathly terrified of spiders, heights, trampolines, water(Aint really a great swimmer) and he had a lower endurance factor._

Likes and Dislike: Spiders, toys, children, irritating noise, ignorant people, bothersome people, hapless people, arrogant people and he pretty much likes anything that doesn't fall into these categories._

Misc: He's African-American with a bit of Caucasian in his blood due to his brown hair._

Well this was a pleasant surprise. Glad to see you activate after such a long time. I appreciate the detail being put into the hectic scenes, and I can't wait to see more out of this. And why did I not see that coming, Ardee being Shido's sacrifice in place of some random student? Considering who he is now, that was about the best way to introduce him without making look bad to the other survivors. Well done, sir.

Wooooow! It has been forever since I last read this fic-I'm really excited to see it back up again. I'm Elle Autumn's creator, my pervious name was Pyrogasmic (which I believe I changed about a year ago). You portrayed Elle perfectly, I'm excited to see where everything goes with this now that you've come back out of retirement. The action scenes, I must say, are phenomenal, probably some of the best I've ever read. It's really hard to find a story with well-written action, and so I appreciate the time you take to describe what's happening.
Definitely can't wait to read more!

I loved the character introductions and the interactions in this chapter. I also really liked the way you characterized Mai. That moment when she squealed was hilarious, and I wonder how the group's going to get out of the school. I can't wait for the next update! :)

Okay, yes this is pretty perfect. Great way to introduce the characters.

"Must have been thousands of them! That was worthy of Stalingrad my friends."

I'm going to read this in sections based on line break.

Section 1
-Well, interesting. I can see the issue this will cause. It's good that you establish this early on, as it would be an actual problem. However, I would think Hank would want to know about how Yui acts. It is an issue, and both he and Hisashi recognize it, but Hank dismisses it. Granted he may only be dismissing it because he needs time to settle his mind. However, while Yui is clingy she has a good idea, getting medical supplies as well as the nurse. Not much else on this.

Section 2
- I feel you introduced Victor perfectly, we get a sense of him here. While he does seem not to be affected we get subtle hints that he in fact is. The description is good, top notch really, as is the presentation of his personality. Very detailed while keeping somethings secret about him. I am confused on one thing. I get that everyone is in Japan, but are they speaking Japanese? What I mean is, while it's in English is Victor talking in Japanese or English to the manager? It's a bit confusing, and normally happens when it comes to multi nation or language works.

Section 3
-Well, that was very unique. We got to see Victor save Coriana from a different perspective. As far as I've seen it's always seeing it from the perspective of the person being saved. A little much on the math, and other analytic jargon, but overall interesting. I can see that every part is going to be seen from a different perspective, described a different way. For that type of variety I already award this part high points.

Section 4
- The humor of the chapter, and you know I got a good chuckle from it. A fangirl that know's when to stop. That is something you don't see, and already I see cat-fight in the future. Serious as this work is it just wouldn't be high-school of the dead without humor. Here we don't get any real decryption other than Hisashi being annoyed with Mai, though we did see that Mai is capable of changing her personality at will. I can see that as an asset, as when safe it will allow for people to calm down, relax, but she can't be serious when she needs to be. People tend to miss the value of that.

Section 5
-Same reaction as with the show. Cool, expected but with more people. From what I've read about the character you are spot on, and I can't wait for how you introduce the others.

Final Verdict
-A decent chapter. You describe things very well, give a little flavor to each perspective so it feels different. The personalities are well done and discernible, don't feel quite so clishie or contrived. I like it, and as I said I'm looking forward to more.

Well, damn. I would say it was like most HOTD fic starts, but it has a different feel. The basic premise is the same, but well executed. I love how you introduce Hank, normally you don't get that many details about the OC lead unitl later. Now we get a pretty good idea upfront so you don't have to spent a lot of time going over it. Now we get to focus on character development instead of back story after back story. The scene where the 'men' were trying to rape the girl, wow. Never saw that this early in a story, show's something broke inside. That's who would really rule and survive in the Apocalypse. People that are broke inside. To note, Patrick would have killed them at once, no questions asked, no discussion, just dead. For future reference.

Name: Dakota
Age: 19
Sex: Male
Nationality: American
Romantic Prefrence: Straight
Skill Set: Hunter Minor: cooking, scavenging,
Appearance: 6'4" ft. red curly hair, blue eyes, 200 lbs. Clothing: Blue jeans, glasses, black shirt underneath red jacket
Family: Bryan (dad) Tina (mom) status: unknown
History: Dakota was signed up for a foreign exchange program in his senior year of high school. He was raised in swampland so he knows how to catch and cook any and all animals. He want fitting in very well until he joined the school archery club where he quickly became the top shot. Then Z-day came. Now Dakota has to rely on his knowledge and skills as a hunter to survive this nightmare.
Personality: Shy, Smart, Somewhat psychotic (though he will never attack those he deems his friends)
Pet: not at home but finds a kitten in an alleyway (names it Mia)
Weapons: Bow and arrows, Hunting knife, 9mm pistol
Weakness: Not very much stamina
Likes: Hunting, his kitten, food, football, video games
Dislikes: the Evil teacher, baseball, rapists, and of course THEM.

PS i cant remember the teachers name so sorry

I liked this.

Fuck my stupid keyboard for not allowing me to type correctly! *mad* Anyways...sorry about that.
I als
Although I don't know about the show or the main characters, I was able to follow this fic, somewhat. The bloody scene was very gory and I liked it. It made me kind of nauseous. XD I also like what you did in here with the OCs and that Hisashi character. :D So, you will consider my character, then? Yes? :D

-Auto-

Well, you have my info, so go crazy. :D

Name: Kyōka-suru

gender: Female

Nickname: Kyo

Age/Grade:16

Sexuality: Straight

eyes: Red (Like Kyo's from Fruits Basket)

Race: Japanese

Height: 5'

Hair: orange (Also like Kyo's) pixie cut

Body: Fit, and skinny.

Scars, Tattoos, or Piercings (etc.): Tongue piercing, scar running down her back. (She is confused as a guy.)

personality: She likes to talk, but is quiet because she is shy. The quietness goes away after she gets to know people. Protective, and will put herself in danger for anyone. Can get lost in books.
What Are Their Traits: Cooks, can run fast, and is a martial arts.

History Before The Outbreak: her family dead in a fire a month before, so she has no family to worry about. Before they died her brother and father abused her because she was different. She lived in trees after they died.

Location At The Beginning Of The Outbreak: Anywhere is fine.

Likes: Cake, music, and books.

Dislikes: spicy food, 'them', and fire.

Love Interest: anyone is fine.

Other: Um... Cookies

Fighting Ability: Excellent

Preferred Weapon: Katana(right hand) and kunai(left hand).

Least Liked Weapon: Guns

Advantages: her fighting skills

Disadvantages: She has a fear of fire.

At School: Boys uniform

When At Home: black cargo pants with chains crisscrossing in the back. Black button up long sleeve, with white ties. (rolls the sleeves up to her elbows) red High tops. Orange beets.

Sleeping: XXlarge man’s T-shirt, with shorts

Father (living or dead):Dead

Mother (living or dead):dead

A good first chapter! It's great to see that you're focusing on keeping the balance of 'character moments' even. I liked how you 'introduced' Hank to some of the canon characters without actually having them meet him (Saeko, Saya, Rei), and it's interesting to see that Hisashi is alive. I look forward to seeing how you write his character and his reactions to the apocalypse considering he has very little character development in the original plot. I have to say, I already like Yui's character, so kudos to CrimsonButterfly07 as well. I read her character profile, and I think you've done a good job introducing her to the story.

Other than that, there were a few spelling and grammar mistakes, but nothing that detracted from the story too much. Also, Hank and Hisashi's style of speech seemed a little too formal, although Hisashi always did seem to be a bit more formal than your average teen. Hell, I guess Hank can speak however you want him to anyway, so... I guess it doesn't really matter too much :)

An enjoyable read, and I look forward to the next update :)

Adj.

Very well written, this stands well above the usual dross in this section. Keep up the good work. Tip that works for me, wait a day or three and then re-read the chapter in your word processor of choice so you can iron out the last few kinks according to your preference.

Cool start! :))) Everything's so detailed! So that was what you meant by the first meeting. : Will it be a SaekoxTakashi Fic? :))

Awesome start! Interesting that you choose to keep Hisashi alive, I'm curious to see how he plays into the story. :)

Can't wait for the next chapter!