Oh man this is boring as hell. Work on it some more. This is kindergarten level of story development.

Could uses some polishing, unnecessary words that could be cut, and a few other thing, I'll use one of the paragraphs as an example

[Before] In my past(?) life, I'm an asian, I was born in Indonesia and lived there my entire life, my skin tone is also brown and my eyes held the same colour, and as a usual asian, my hair was black

[After] In my past life, I was Asian, born in Indonesia and lived there all my life. My skin was once a caramel brown, my eyes had took a similar colour, and like most Asians my hair was black."

The premise of the story is quite interesting, however, after that you have completely lost me. First up, comma’s after quotation marks, a big-fat-no. I’d recommend going through your story and changing that as soon as possible, because that just makes the story really hard to read. Another thing, continuing character dialogue right after the last characters dialogue. Another big-fat-no.

Mannnn I wanna see him be badass and not a goody guy who helps Naruto nah i wanna see him become the new kaguya ALL IS CHAKRA IS MINE NOW and the he bends over kaguya and puts little dovhas in her

Calling Pein an edge lord, put meet kettle

I'm liking how this is blending, especially the old Team Seven at the end!

I think you should refrain from referring to anyone as 'Dummy #1' or anything. He's just a thug, you could simply leave things like that be.

Interested to see where this goes :D

Oooh, Skyrim and Naruto! I'm in, although you could have spent just a little more time going through what the protagonist feels when he realizes he's Dovahkiin. It feels a little too...'Oh, I'm a video game character, okay then?'

Maybe a bit about the feeling of a new body, or a different voice, I dunno. Maybe you'll do it in the upcoming chapters?

Irrespective, you write well. I'll keep reading!

what is that first character I regognize wa and ri but I'm not far enough in my japanese lessons to recognize the katakana or kanji heck I think I know less than half of the hiragana

I think I see where you are going with this. I do hope he doesn't turn out to be a completely amoral asshat though.

this story is good but dont make him help naruto, because it's overdone already.

Welp, I'm intrigued. It's too early to have any clue whether I'm going to like the story or not, but I'm interested enough to keep an eye on this.

This seems an interesting concept, looking forward to the next chapters.