Hi, guys. I am open to advice, tips, constructive criticism and the like. I think its nice that you would come to read my profile. :) Thanks
You can call me Skylar, Sky, or SJ; which ever floats your boat :).

You can find me on tumblr at

yeah. I have been on a sort of hiatus from fanfiction; I guess I can't find the time anymore, I barely have time to keep up a tumblr which is updated sporadically at best. Eventually I would like to finish any unfinished fanfiction, although I know it is more than likely that I won't. I sincerely apologize to you all. Later days - SJ

Ok, About myself:

Hm, what would you like to know? I guess, in short, I am a fan of many things and hope to go into the film or videogame industry either writing, directing, or producing them. If you would like to know anything else don't be afraid to ask :)

And now for random stuff I felt belonged on my profile:

Sometimes people put up walls not to keep people out but to see who cares enough to tear
them down.

You only have ONE advantage over me: you can kiss my ass and I can't!

They laugh at me because I'm different. I laugh at them because they're all the same.

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile

"I walk, talk, eat and sleep on earth, but I live my life in a completely different world."

I don't have a short temper, I have a quick reaction to bullshit.

When life gives you lemons, throw the annoying fruits back at life and demand chocolate be thrown instead.

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world figure out how you did it.

'Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.'

If ye a little bit of Decepticon in you, paste this onto your profile!

If you know someone who should be squashed by Megatron, copy and paste in your profile.

Having mad ninja skills is awesome, but mandatory when you are always dropping things. - my best friend

Eat the damn chocolate cake, get your hair wet, love someone, dance in those muddy puddles, tell someone off, draw a picture with crayons like you're 6 years old and then give it to someone who is very important to you. Take a nap, go on vacation, do a cartwheel, make your own recipe, dance like no one sees you, paint each nail a different color, take a bubble bath, laugh at a corny joke. Pick strawberries, take a jog, plant a garden, make an ugly shirt and wear it all day. Learn a new language, write a song, date someone you usually wouldn't go for, make a scrapbook, go on a picnic, relax in the sun, make your own home video. Kiss the un-kissed. Hug the un-hugged, love the unloved and live life to the fullest. Live like you are

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you laugh uncontrollably at your own jokes. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings, print them off and tape them to your wall, just for something to do. Crazy is when you laugh when nothing's funny. Crazy is when you crack up if someone says "Oatmeal!". Crazy is when you forget what you're saying in the middle of a sentence. Crazy is when you take the time to write down stuff like this and memorize it. Crazy is when you are going through this as a checklist. Crazy is when you quote Charlie the Unicorn at random moments. Crazy is when you're crazy. Crazy is when start talking nonsense everyday during gym. Crazy is when you convince your friends you're 'amazing' because you can't stop laughing even when nothing is funny. And then all of you convince the nearest adult that you're having a breakdown. Crazy is when you trip up the stairs, and laugh all the way back down them. Crazy is when it is last day of school you scream and run around in circles. Crazy is when you get drunk on air and laugh during the saddest part of the move. Crazy is when you pick up a stick and run around screaming, "I'm a pixie!". Crazy is when you eat your friend's chocolate bar and tell them that the Purple Sandwich Monster did it. Crazy is when you hug people who hate being hugged every two minutes. Crazy is when after you watch a movie, you search it on Wikipedia. Crazy is the friends in your head. Crazy is when you get excited because you never knew that there were tabs on the sides of the tin foil box that you can push in to keep the roll from falling out. Crazy is when your friend tells you to run down the hall saying “There is a banana in your hat!” and you do it. Crazy is when you run around the house in footie pajamas. Crazy is when you are talking and don’t have a word, so you use sound effects. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done to the list! Crazy is when you threaten to throw a banana at someone.

How to Tell if You're a Writer

-If you talk to yourself.
-If you talk to yourself about talking to yourself (i.e. "I wonder why I talk to myself so much?")
-If, when you talk to yourself, you sometimes speak as if talking to another person (i.e. "Okay, so have you ever noticed that the word ‘deliver’ could mean removing someone’s liver?’")
-If, after uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand in awe and say, "Wow, this is good stuff for sugar highs!"
-If you live off of sugar and caffeine.
-If people start to notice that you tend to check your e-mail every day for a week, then suddenly disappear off the face of the planet.
-If your e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.
-If, when replying to someone else’s e-mail, you are sometimes so random that you fail to address the original message altogether.
-If you tend to collect the Bic Stics people leave lying around, kind of like picking pennies off the ground.
-If, no matter where you are in your room, you never have to so much as get up to reach a pen/pencil and paper.
-If people think you might have A.D.D.
-If you start constantly talking in third person, past tense.
-If you think about making lists like this, and start giggling for no "apparent" reason.
-If your friends don’t even bother to look funny at you anymore when you start giggling for no apparent reason.
-If you try to return to an old forum only to disappear again after resolving not to and the cause is you're writing.
-If you can't escape plot bunnies.
-If you have conversations with yourself as your oc’s inside your head. (oh my goodness, yes, all the time)
-If you have moments of writing genius during the most inopportune times.
-If your family is just beginning to realize the depth to your weirdness.
-If you are now wondering why weird has the e before the i when i is supposed to come before e.
-If you think that it’s because the word weird is just weird.
-If your version of a short story is no shorter than a ten minute long epic.
-If you add to this list

36 Things To Do In An Elevator

1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside, and ask, "Got enough air in there?"

2. Stand silent and motionless in one corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to open the doors, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open by themselves.

4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask them all to call you Admiral.

5. Meow occasionally.

6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" and back away slowly.

7. Say "DING!" at every floor.

8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.

9. Make explosion noises whenever someone else pushes a button.

10. Stare grinning at another person for a while, then say, "I have new socks on."

11. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, "Is that your beeper?"

12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.

13. Draw a little square with chalk on the floor then say to the other passengers, "This is my personal space."

14. When there's only one other person on the elevator, tap them on the shoulder then pretend it wasn't you.

15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug with the other passengers. Tell them that you will never forget them.

16. Ask if you can push the buttons for other people, but push the wrong ones.

17. Hold the doors open and say that you're waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close and say, "Hi, Greg. How's your day been?"

18. Drop a pen and wait until someone bends to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"

19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.

20. Pretend that you're a flight attendant, and review emergency exits with the other passengers.

21. Swat at flies that don't exist.

22. Yell, "Group hug!", then enforce it.

23. Make race car noises when someone gets on or off.

24. Congradulate all for being in the same lift as you.

25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"

26. Walk in with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!", then whistle innocently.

28. Let your cell phone ring--don't answer it.

29. Walk into the lift and say, "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."

30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when others don't.

31. Ask people which floor they want, then say, "Is that your final answer?"

32. Also in your bellboy act, ask people what floor they want. Whenever they answer, give them a glare and say, "You should be ashamed of yourself!"

33. Ask loudly, "Did you feel that?"

34. Tell different people that you can see their aura.

35. When the door closes, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."

36. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body." (Did anyone else notice there are only 36, when it says 37?)

The Insanity Test (I've bolded the ones that are me)

You have screamed at an inanimate object for 'hurting you.' (Like Wheelie in RotF: Ow! That Friggen hurt!)
You have run into a glass/screen door.
You have jumped out of a moving vehicle.
You have thought of something funny and laughed, and then people gave you weird looks. (Lots of times)
You have run into a tree/bush.
You have been called a blond.

TOTAL: 6/6

You know that it IS possible to lick your elbow.
You just tried to lick your elbow. (I ain’t that stupid! {ok I’ve tried it before and failed, so I knew these two from experience})
You never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star had the same melody.
You just sang them to make sure. (I can’t believe I’ve never noticed that before!)
You have tripped on your own feet and fallen.
You have choked on your own spit.

TOTAL: 4/6

You have seen the Matrix and still don't get it.
You type with three fingers or less. (teehee! I know how to type!)
You have accidentally caught something on fire.
You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose.
You have caught yourself drooling

TOTAL: 1/5

You have fallen asleep in class. (ok, this one is a no-brainer. If you're an author, then you know that you have stayed up late at night to either read or write fanfiction so sleeping in the last class of the day is mandatory [especially when you are watching broadway shows in acting])
Sometimes you just stop thinking.
Sometimes when you are telling a story you forget what you are talking about. (stupid distracting, shiny objects)
People often shake their heads and walk away from you (And then they yell at me when I do it to them!)
You are often told to use your 'inside voice.'(it's a higher intelligence thing. The smarter you are the louder you talk)

TOTAL: 5/5

You use your fingers to do simple math.
You have eaten a bug accidentally... (I know I have, I was just asleep)
You are taking this test when you should be doing something more important. (should be doing math. Holds head low in shame.)
You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn't realize it. (multiple times and gone out like that)
You've looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand/pocket the whole time. (MOM! I can't find my phone!! she points to my hand. How do you do that? You can always find something?)

TOTAL: 4/5

You have posted bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen if you don't.
You break a lot of things.
You tilt your head when you're confused. (Totally!)
You have fallen out of your chair before.
When you're lying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture on the ceiling.
The word "um" is used frequently.
You don't know what "um" means. (it means something?)
You say "what" and "huh" a lot.
You plan to use a calculator to multiply your score for this bulletin.

TOTAL: 8/9

GRAND TOTAL: 28

Now divide it by thirty six and times by 100

I guess I’m 77 percent insane. Interesting. . .

eliforp rouy otni siht ypoc ,sdrawkcab siht daer ot hguone trams era uoy fI

Take your time and see if you can read each line aloud without a mistake. The average person can't.

this is this cat

this is is cat

this is how cat

this is to cat

this is keep cat

this is an cat

this is idiot cat

this is busy cat

this is for cat

this is forty cat

this is seconds cat

Now go back and read the THIRD word in each line from the top down and I bet you can't resist passing it on.

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (Well, frag, when else will I have time to use it?)

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (And I thought this soap was special! How do you use regular soap anyway?)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Aww, Damn! Too late!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (Go figure, I put it in the microwave to cool down.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (I'd say that method of ironing works very well. Yet again, what dumbass tried to iron the clothes on their body?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (That is correct, we need to stop them five year olds from driving them cars.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (Now why would sleep aid make me drowsy?)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (Well where else would you use it?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (*Whispers to guy next to him* “What’s the other use? “..I have no idea..”)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Go figure...I wanted almonds!)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (Good to know.)(Too bad about the other guy who everyone now calls 'Stumpy.')

On plastic wrapping: "Do not put on head...may result in suffociation." (There goes my plans for today!)

On baby stroller: “Remove child before folding.” (*Sigh* Do I have to?)

On a brass fishing lure with a three pronged hook on the end: “Harmful if swallowed.” (I wonder who got to test that out? Because that sounds fun.)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity copy and paste this into your profile! XD

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

They say, "Guns don’t kill people, people kill people.' Well, I think the gun helps, because if you just stood there and yelled, "BANG" I don’t think you'd kill too many people.

So, if guns kill people, can I blame misspelled words on my pencil?

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.

Life isn't passing me by; it's trying to run me over.

Smile; it makes people wonder what you're up to.

Your weirdness is creeping out my imaginary friend.

Everyone has the right to be stupid. You're abusing your privileges.

A friend told me I was delusional. I almost fell off my unicorn.

I'm not saying let's go kill all the stupid people, I'm just saying let's remove all the warning labels and let the problem sort itself out.

"Hold your head high, and your middle finger higher." Megan Fox (Pit yeah!)

I'm not weird. I'm limited edition.

If electricity comes from electrons, where do you think morality comes from?

Dear McDonalds, Thank you for not selling hot dogs. I don't think I'd be able to order a McWiener with a straight face.

Grammar: The difference between knowing your crap, and knowing you're crap.

Welcome to the Dark Side. Are you surprised we lied about having cookies?

Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning many and 'tics' as in the bloodsucking creatures?

Everything in this room is eatable, even I'm eatable. But that is called 'cannibalism' my dear children, and is in fact frowned upon in most societies.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese!

Home is not where you live, but where they understand you.

If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving isn't for you!

I look at people sometimes and think. . . Really? That's the sperm that won?

I'm not random, you just don't think as fast as me.

Sometimes I pretend to be normal. But then it gets boring, so I go back to being me.

That moment when you're like: 'WHO THE PIT TOOK MY, oh. . . here it is. . .'

I wish I could google anything. Like "Where is my phone?" and Google would be like, "It's under the couch, dumbass."

Always be positive. (Trips down stairs) Me: "Wow! I got down those stairs fast!"

If you're gonna be two-faced, sweetie at least make one of them pretty.

You say I'm not cool. Cool is just another word for cold. If I'm not cold then I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thank You for embracing it!

Come to the Dark Side... we have cookies!

One day we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.

Before you criticize someone walk a mile in their shoes, that way you'll be a mile away and have their shoes!

The statistics of insanity is that 1 of every 4 people have a mental illness. Look at your three best friends; if they're okay, then it's you.

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.

A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work.

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.

Two things are infinite; the universe, and human stupidity... not so sure about the universe.

What happens if you get scared half to death twice? That's a really good question... I wonder...

My mind works like lightning... one brilliant flash and it's gone.

Do not take life too seriously; no one gets out alive. - If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.

Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?

I was going to take over the world, but I got distracted by something sparkly.

Yes, I do use my hairbrush as a microphone and dance around in my underwear. Thank you very much.

Please: Don't throw your cigarette butt's on the floor, the cockroaches are getting cancer.

There are three kinds of people: Those who can count, and those who can't.

Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

Life was so simple when boys had cooties

My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems.

You know what makes letting go of a crush so hard? The fear that the moment you let go, they'll catch on.

“Everyday I think people can't get any stupider, and everyday I'm proven horribly wrong.”

"A wise man once said, "I don't know - go ask a woman."

Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard and be Evil.

"No one is a virgin, the world screws us all."

"Stupid kills, unfortunately not fast enough"

"They say the truth will set you free. But then why is it that every time I tell the truth I get sent to my room?"

"Just be yourself everyone else is taken."

"You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to sky dive TWICE."

"If everything seems to being going well...you have OBVIOUSLY overlooked something..."

HOW I EXPLAIN LIFE AND DEATH...

Life, is like God's way of kicking your sorry butt out of heaven and yelling, "AND DON'T COME BACK!!"

Death, is like God's way of dragging you back up to heaven by your collar, mumbling, "Okay, I think you've done enough damage..."

HOW TO KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

1) At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2) Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3) Insist that your e mail address is:
Xena-Warrior Princess@
or Elvis-the-King@.

4) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

5) Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair dancing.

6) Put your garbage can on your desk and label it 'IN'.

7) Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.

8) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

9) In the memo field of all your checks, write 'for sexual favors.'

10) Reply to everything someone says with,'That's what you think.'

11) Finish all your sentences with:'In accordance with the prophecy.'

12) Adjust the tint on your monitor so that the brightness level lights up the entire work area. Insist to others that you like it that way.

13) dont use any punctuation

14) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

15) Ask people what sex they are and laugh hysterically after they answer.

16) Specify that your drive-through order is 'to go.'

17) Sing along at the opera.

18) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

19) Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if your boss is of the opposite gender.)

20) Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them what you're doing. For example, 'If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom, in Stall #3.

21) Put mosquito netting around your cubicle. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.

22) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.

23) Call 999 and ask if 999 is for emergencies.(don't do this!)

24) Call the psychic hot line and don't say anything.

25) Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard.

26) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream, 'I Won! I Won! 3rd time this week!!'

27) When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling, 'Run for your lives, they're loose!'

28) Tell your boss, 'It's not the voices in my head that bother me, it’s the nd quote them regularly)

.:FIRE:.

You have a short temper.
You often act on your emotions without thinking first.
You are very competitive.
You like to play with fire.
You are not a strong swimmer or you can't swim at all.
You prefer warm weather over cold weather.
You often lose control over yourself.
You can be quite reckless.
You sometimes hurt people without realizing it.
People have often called you insane.
Total: 7

.:WATER:.

You have a calm, laid-back personality.
You like to go to the beach.
You rarely get angry
When you do get angry, you know how to control it.
You think before you act.
You are good at breaking up fights.
You are a good swimmer.
You like the rain.
You can stay calm in stressful situations.
You are very generous.

Total: 7

.:EARTH:.

You are physically strong.
You have a close connection with nature.
You don't mind getting dirty.
You form strong opinions on issues that concern you.
You could easily survive in the wild.
You care about the environment.
You can easily focus on your work without getting distracted.
You rarely get depressed.
You aren't afraid of anything.
You prefer to have a strict set of rules.
Total: 4

.:AIR:.

You have a free spirit.
You hate rules.
You prefer to be out in the open rather than in small, enclosed spaces.
You hate to be restrained.
You are very independent and outgoing.
You are quite intelligent.
You tend to be impatient.
You are easily distracted.
You can sometimes be hyperactive and/or annoying.
You wish you could fly.
Total: 9

.: DARKNESS:.

You spend most of your time alone.
You prefer nighttime over daytime.
You like creepy things.
You like to play tricks on people.
Black is your favorite color.
You prefer the villains over the heroes in movies, TV shows, videogames, etc.
You don't talk much.
You don't mind watching scary movies.

Total: 4

:LIGHT:.

You are very polite.
You are spiritual.
When someone is in trouble, you never hesitate to help them.
You believe everything you see or hear.
You are afraid of the dark.
You hate violence.
You hope for world peace.
You are generally a happy person.
Everyone loves to be around you.
You always follow the rules.
Total: 6

I got Air. Cool beans :)