I'm not random, i just have many thoug- OH A SQUIRREL!

Hello people of Earth! I'm Max and me in a tree. You can call me Max (James Patterson's one and only). When I grow up I want to be an author more than anything in the world. Shoot me a PM sometime, Kay?

Kay.

Anon reviews are welcome!!! I am so irked at the people who don't allow anon reviews! Silly people, trix are for kids! And if you read my stories pleeeeeeeeeze review!!! Even if it sucks, I'd like to know ya care!!!

I love all of you guys that reviewed, you rock on high, and you get virtual ice cream sundaes!!!!!!

Sorry guys! Represent, and probably Gods Camp will be taken down shortly. But thanks anyways! They will be edited and continued on my ficpress account (link below)

Dear Voldemort,
So they screwed up your nose too?
Sincerely, Michael Jackson

Dear Yahoo,
I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it..." just saying...
Sincerely, Google

Dear 6,
Please stop spreading rumors about me eating 9. You shouldn't be talking. I hear you guys do some pretty nasty things.
Sincerely, 7

Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely, Unicorns

Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely, Canada

Dear Impossible,
Screw you. I just made a campfire underwater.
Sincerely,
Spongebob

Here's the link to my ficpress account. Go check it out, I have so much stuff on there that it's not even funny!

http://www.fictionpress.info/mypoortoaster

Name: Emily :3

Age: it changes every year, so why does it matter?

Gender: I'm. A. Girl. DONE!

Location: AQUI!

Appearance: Dirty blonde, blue eyes, 5'2 and not growing anymore.

Things that I like: Nico Di Angelo, computer keys, Pickett fences, cute eyes, stuffed dogs, light rain, Fang, Lorien Legacies, writing on walls, lacrosse sticks, key chains, birthday cake, down comforters, glow-in-the-dark stickers, NYC, Scrabble, funhouse mirrors, short skirts, snowmen pajamas in june, penutbutter, skinny jeans that FIT, swings, girl scout cookies, cool eyeliner, pay checks, Max (the cutest boy ever, coincidentally), Wade mah Bffl, Livieee my bestie, internet smiles. ;)

Things that I hate: Jason Grace, typewriters, barbed wire, creepy smiles, mean rottweilers, thunder, Angel (she scares me), Mogodorians, construction-worker butt cracks, black eyes, fingernails on chalkboards, rotton eggs, my horrible mattress, sticky fingers, the country, spelling tests, mirror mazes, mom's shopping, footsie pjs, grape jelly, skinny jeans that DON'T, headaches, step-on scales, smudged mascara, minimum wage, Wades girlfriend, Livieee dating my enemy, internet frowns. :'(

Siblings: I have an evil little sis who's a seventh grader. :P She can be cute some of the time, but mostly she just gets on my nerves. She has... issues.

Birthday: January 8th (Elvis's birthday)

Pets: Stuffed...

Where am I found frequently?: My room, under my bed, on my hammock, at school, in my dining room doing algebra, on my laptop. Sometimes in a tree with Max ( the book character, not the person).

What do I like to do?: Read, write, type, doodle, water ski. Listen to my music. Go on mission trips. DRAMA!!!! Photography.

What will I be when I grow up?: Hopefully, an author. Writing is awesome and I'd love for that to become my job. If I fail at that (which is totally possible) I'll be an actress. I like not being myself. I'm just so boring!

Favorite real authors: I luv John Green, RR, James Patterson, Ally Carter, Suzanne Collins, Scott Westerfield, Pittacus Lore, Neil Shusterman, Susan Pfeffer, etc!!!

Favorite ff authors: Di Angelo Grace Jackson (she's my best friend), FutureNovelist887 (I found her through Di), strangerthingshavhappened, bookluver07. You guys rule!!!

37 Secrets About Yourself--now updated again again again again!!!
(Be honest no matter what.)

1) Have you ever been asked out?
Kind of.

2) What is your default picture?
Me. IN ANIME!!!

3) What's your middle name?
Marie. It was my great grandmother's name on some side.

4) Your current relationship status?
Singlejingle.

5) Does your crush like you back?
It's complicated.

6) What is your current mood?
EXCITED! New laptop :):):)

7) What color of underwear are you wearing?
Say WHAT? Who answers things like this?...red...

8) What color shirt are you wearing?

Blue.

9) Missing something?

Is that a statement or a question?

10) If you could go back in time and change something, what would you change?

Oh God no.

11) If you must be an animal for one day, what would you be?
Wolf. I've loved them since I was a little kid. And Sirius Black is awesome :):):)

12) Ever had a near death experience?
Yha. I kicked a heavy blanket on my head when i was two hours old and I could've died if my mom hadn't come to check on me... And of course my little sister tried to drown me... Does that count?

13) Something you do a lot?
write. read. doodle. think about nothing particular. Stay up late.

14) The song stuck in your head?

Be My Ooh Lala, Britany Spears

15) Who did you copy and paste this from?
FutureNovelist887

16) Name someone with the same birthday as YOU?
Elvis Presley--lol!!! :D and my friend Kelly... and Eliza. And Maddie Richey -.-

17) When was the last time you cried?

Bennett. He was great friend and athlete. R.I.P. Bro. :(

18) Have you ever sung in front of a large audience?
Not really.

19) If you could have one super power what would it be?
MIND READING hands down. Best power ever :) YA-YUH.

20) What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
normally their eyes. I'm a sucker for boys with nice eyes...

21) What do you usually order from Starbucks?
Caramel Ribbon Crunch Frapp

22) What's your biggest secret?

Can you not?

23) Favorite color?
black, and im not emo!!!! *grumbles off*

24) Do you still watch kiddie shows?

No?

25) What are you?
Human (?) what kind of question is that?

26) Do you speak any other language?

Going into Espanol dos

27) What's your favorite smell?
P.S. I Love You Spring Fling

28) Describe your life in one word what would it be?
chaotic. end of story.

29) Have you ever kissed in the rain?
Nope.

30) What are you thinking about right now?
Ninjas.

31) What should you be doing?

Sleeping

32) Who was the last person that made you upset/angry?
My sis. She's the worst.

33) Do you like working in the yard?

not unless there's money invovled. =)

34) If you could have any last name in the world, what would you want?

Krewson.

35) Do you act differently around the person you like?
...mayyyybe.

36) What is your natural hair color?
Dirty blonde. I got my bangs dyed bright blonde though, and it's cool... except when it gets wet, then its just weird. My normal hair turns dark brown, and my highlights stay white! I look like a skunk! My mom says my hair will be brown when i grow up... I do NOT want that!

37) Who was the last person to make you cry?

Bennett

What's your favorite article of clothing? Short Shorts

Who is the most special person to you? Mis Padres

What's your favorite childhood memory? ...I dont really have any good ones.

One word that would best describes you? energetic, most of the time. Except mornings, I'm a major night owl.

What is your favorite month in the summer? July.

What's your favorite number? 2. Always has been, always will be.

What is the nicest thing anyone ever said to you? Dwayne said I used great metaphors :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D oh and Jeff said I reminded him of a friend :)

What does your username mean? It's very catchy, and it even rhymes!!!!! It also has to do with one of my favorite books, Maximum ride. BUT ITS NOT ROMANTIC ON PURPOSE!!! (if you don't know what I'm talking about, it doesn't matter.)

What is your favorite Disney movie? TANGLED!!!!!! XD

What made you smile today? Sarah, Alexa, Sally, Hallie, my sis, Wade, Maggie, Zack, Thomas, Kevin, Luci

Last thing you said out loud? "The sixth"

Do you want a haircut? IF YOU GET NEAR MY HAIR... i have a stick.

Are you musically inclined? There was this period that I had in the second grade where all that i wanted to do was play instruments... so yes, I can play about ten different ones. But I'm more of a drummer

Have you ever been in a fight? Not physically.

Say this to any boy that makes/made you upset or angry or hurt or sad (not mine):

Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet and so are you.

But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugarbowl's empty and so is your head.

Random stuff: I don't own it but they all apply to me :)

Don’t mess with me; I've got a stick

Don't follow in my footsteps, I tend to walk into walls

I call things as I see them; If I didn't see them, I make them up!

Please note : Christmas is cancelled - apparently you told Santa you were good this year ... and he died laughing

I've got ADD and magic markers. Oh, the fun I will have!

I have a gun!... would you like to buy some girl scout cookies?

I'm going on a quest, to the deepest, darkest corners of my room, in search of what some would call a "floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me my friends, wish me luck, for I may not return alive

You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 50 and I'm still 49, who will be laughing then?

If you never study but get an A on every test, copy and paste this on your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. I am Weird and PROUD OF IT!

"I didn't loose my mind, I sold it on eBay."

"I dont suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it."

1 out of every 4 people are insane. Look at your three best friends, if it's not them, it's you.

I am NOT saying your stupid...I'm just implying it.

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff ... I laugh even harder. Hey, I'm the one that pushed you!

A wise man once said, "Ask a girl."

"Diamonds are a girls best friend...because they're shaper then knives."

"Boys are like lava lamps fun to look at, but not very bright."

"I'm the type of girl who will laugh at a scary movie, but screams bloody murder when toast pops out the toaster... AHHH TOAST!!!!"

Silence is golden, but duck tape is silver

Duct tape is like the force, it has a light side and a dark side and it holds the universe together

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

People say "Money can't buy happiness," but it can buy marshmellows... isn't that the same thing?my friend Livie said that.

Always forgive your enemies: Nothing annoys them more

The person who smiles when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on

I got you a present. It's a CD. I hope you don't have it already coz I don't have the receipt. i didn't exactly buy it.

I took the road less traveled... NOW WHERE THE HECK AM I?

If you wish on a falling star it might come true... Unless it's a meteor hurdling to earth... Then no wishes come true... Unless your wish was to be killed a meteor hurdling to earth.

Remember what you just said, because tomorrow I am going to have a witty and sarcastic comeback and you'll be devastated then!

I am not a loser. A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work.

Normal is just a setting on washing machines.

I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I don't have any clean laundry because, come on, who wants to wash clothes on the last day of their life?

Life is like a pack of gum... I've yet to figure out why.

"I'm not afraid of Death. What's he gonna do, kill me?"

If you ever read past four in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

98 of teenagers do drugs, have sex, and drink alcohol...put this in your profile if you like bagels

If you are obsessively, uncontrolably, in love with Fang post this in your profile.

If you like Dylan and support Mylan, GO DIE IN A HOLE!

"Do I really have to pet the hot dog?" my best friend, Di.

Glee quotes:

"He's never late. He runs like an expensive Swiss watch reproduced cheaply by China." Artie

"This is where our daughter or gay son will sleep." Terri

"(to Mercedes) You look like a technicolor zebra." Kurt

"Oh Bambi... I cried so hard when those hunters shot your mommy..." Kurt

"He's...Sebastian the Criminal Chipmunk!" Santana

You've gotta love Dolly Parton for saying this: "People keep calling me a dumb blonde. I know that you're wrong though, because I know I'm not dumb, and I know I'm not blond!"

I love her!!! :)

Fanfiction/ficpress stuff:

favorite ff that I wrote: ...I have no idea. but I do like the two chapters of Surviving the Richards-Nico style which is mostly by Di Angelo Grace Jackson (mah bff)

favorite ficpress that I wrote: Twelve. Hands down best thing I ever wrote, the update should come tomorrow maybe. The chapters are gunna be long, cool?

favorite fanfic: All of that stuff is down there. Further. Yeah, there. Now click 'favorites' and read away!!! All of them (mostly) are loved equally by meh!!!

favorite ficpress: Thats also up there on my ficpress account.

Things that need entries/audience participation: Fantasisical mailbox and PJO raps. Check it down zere.

If you have ever had a crush on a fictional character, copy and paste this on your profile and add your penname and the name(s) of the characters you have crushed on: HollyluvsArty (James Potter, Sirius Black (when he was young), Artemis Fowl) comix-freak (Artemis Fowl (and Arty is my one and only!))scarilyobsessed(Fang, from maximum ride) Natalie-07 (Jack Sparrow, I know I know he's older then my dad but it's not like we're actually dating!) Silverstar's Shadow (Kratos Aurion (like practically every other girl who plays ToS religiously), Yuan ( @#!*% the people who decided to never tell you his last name!), Sirius Black (not Gary the Old Man... I imagined him to look a little more like Adam from Three Days Grace... hehe... Ahem.), Draco Malfoy), Darkstorm Mistystar's Legacy (Jasper Cullen...sigh), OokamiRyuX (don’t wanna say) Crowfeather's Girl (Edward Cullen from Twilight, of course!) AkumuKitty9797(Dark Link from Legend of Zelda and Edward Cullen from Twilight!!), HiddenMusic(Sora from Kingdomg Hearts:D) Zefri012: Leaf (heroine of Pokemon fire red/leaf green. Oh come on! She's too adorable!), Defiatos X-Natsumi from Keroro gunso (crosses finger and hopes Giroro doen't try to kill me), ej8012 (Nico di Angelo, lol and Red X from Teen titans (Guess I have a thing for dark peoples)), AnnleaDaughterofZeus,(Nico Di Angelo), Flockgirl (Nico di Angelo 'Percy Jackson', Gaara 'Naruto', Toushiro Hitsugaya 'Bleach', Fang "Maximum Ride', Zero 'Vampire knight', The Twins and Kyouya 'Ouran high school host club', Otani 'Lovely Complex') I'm Hopeless! FutureNovelist887(Percy Jackson himself.) Di Angelo Grace Jackson321 (Nico Di Angelo.) Max and me in a tree(Nico from PJO and Fang from MR!!!!)

If you review one of my stories, please PM me also and tell me more in detail of what you think! I'll review anything that I like, but I try not to CC and I never flame!

Here's all of my Polyvore stuff! More to come!

http:///cgi/set?id=33934356 This is Lexi's Christmas stuff from Thrice!

http:///cgi/set?id=33933285 This is Erica's Christamas clothes!

http:///cgi/set?id=33937461 This is Max's camping gear for Camper's Curse. Should I do one for Fang?

http:///cgi/set?id=33939388This is Cammie's NYC gear.

http:///cgi/set?id=34675965 This is Nico's clothes in chapter 2 of U13.

http:///cgi/set?id=36841005Hestia in chapter 4 of U13

Well, you seem to have reached the bottom of my profile!!!!!!

Thanks,

Em :)

PS: My mom told me this: When in doubt, scream something you believe in. NICOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!