Phoenix Martinez-Ride
 Author has written 22 stories for Twilight, Maximum Ride, Cars, Vampire Academy, Bones, How to Train Your Dragon, Big Hero 6, Harry Potter, Zootopia, Voltron: Legendary Defender, Brave, 2012, and Avengers. Watch me on DeviantART: REALMaximumRide check out my tumblr! ABOUT ME NAME: Ebony Jade BIRTHDAY: nineteenth of august RELIGION: im Wicca MY ELEMENT: my element is Water MY STYLE: Casual. like jeans and a t-shirt MY PETS: Ash Ketchum, the rabbit. Wentworth, Archibald, the guinea pigs. Also a dog named Benny at my dad's house. FAVORITE TV SHOWS: Modern Family, Bob's Burgerss, Simpsons, Futurama, Bones, Big Bang Theory, Dragons Riders of Berk FAVORITE BOOKS: vampire academy, magic in Manhattan, poison study, hunger games, Harry Potter, Maximum Ride FAVORITE MOVIES: MCU, Deadpool, Zootopia, Megamind, cars, cars 2, anything Pixar, final destination, mean girls, Romey and Michelle's high school reunion, bring it on, How to Train Your Dragon, Big Hero 6 FAVORITE FOOD: Cookies, pasta, ice cream, sour worms, original pringles FAVORITE TAKE-AWAY: KFC FAVORITE COULOR: Black or bright green FAVORITE ANYTHING ELSE I THINK OF: FAVORITE ELEMENT: Spirit RANDOM FACTS: WARNING!!! DON'T EVER FOLLOW IN MY FOOTSTEPS! I TEND TO JUMP OFF TALL THINGS! QUESTIONS ABOUT YOU: Name without vowels- Real name: bny jde. Pen name: Phnx Mrtnz-Rd You single?- yes Favourite number?- 14 Colour you wear most?- black Least favourite colour?- pink Favourite candy?- POCKY!! What do you smoke?- nothing Are you happy with your life right now?- HELL YEAH!!! Anyone ever said you resemble a celebrity?- no What is/was your favourite class in school?- the time the final bell rings How do you make money?- I don’t have a job Are you outgoing?- nope One word to describe you?- Fan-girl Favourite pair of shoes- my grey leather lace up boots (even though i'm against wearing leather. my mum always says 'if you eat meat then whats the issue? why waste the skin?' well i'll tell you what the issue is! the issue is that meat is part of a healthy diet, wearing leather is not) Do you own big sunglasses?- yes Where do you wish you were right now?- In my bed HONEST SECTION: Honestly, what are you doing right now?- this Honestly, have you done something bad today?- duh Honestly, who is the last person you spoke to on the phone?- mum Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now?- Nope Honestly, what makes you mad most of the time?- anti-choice assholes on tumblr, anti-lgbtq people on tumblr, Honestly, do you bite your nails?- yes Honestly, do you want to see someone this very moment?- no Honestly, do you have a friend you don't actually like?- No, if i didn't like them, why would they be my friend? THE CANS: Can you blow a bubble?- yes Can you dance?- sure , but my own dance I made up Can you do a cartwheel?- I think so ... Can you tie a cherry stem with your mouth?- never tried… ok I just tried, managed to do it, but then nearly chocked to death. Can you whistle?- yes Can you wiggle your ears?- No Can you wiggle your nose?- no Can you roll your tongue?- Yup! Can you make a clover with your tongue?- what? ANGER SECTION: What do you do when you're mad?- I need to hit something Ever made anyone cry when you're mad?- yes , heaps of times, mainly due to the fact that if you mess with me, I turn into a massive bitch CRYING SECTION: Ever really cry your heart out?- very very rarely Ever cried yourself to sleep?- yes Ever cried on your friends shoulder?- yes Ever cried over the opposite gender?- yes Ever cried over the same gender?- yes Do you cry when you get an injury?- no , I have had so many accidents that I'm actually used to it Do certain songs make you cry?- Depends. Sometimes in sad movies the backing song cry even harder. Like the beach scene in My Sister's Keeper, which is set to 'Feels Like Home To Me' Do certain movies make you cry?- yes. Here's an incomplete list HAPPY SECTION: Are you usually a happy person?- Yeah What makes you happiest?- at the moment? HTTYD Does being with your friends make you happy?- Yeah Do you believe in yourself?- HELL YEAH!!!!! Do you wish you were happier?- it's impossible Is being happy overrated?- No Does music make you happy?- sure HATE SECTION: Do you actually hate anyone?- YES YES AND YES Ever made a hit-list?- yup Have you ever been on a hit-list?- yes, unfortunately, but doesn't happen too much anymore (hmm wonder why *evil laugh*) Are you a mean bully?- if you mess with me, yeah Do you hate your President?-no, but if don't particularly like my Prime Minister CURRENTLY WEARING?: What shirt are you wearing?- awesome studded leather jacket Shoes?: black graffiti print converse Necklace(s): lucky four-leaf clover one. HAVE YOU EVER?: Hugged someone?- Yes,friends , family etc. Laughed so hard you cried?- no Kissed someone?- duh THE LAST: Person you spoke to in person?- my auntie Evelyn Person you talked to online?- Some stupid anti choicer on tumblr Person you hugged?- My sister RANDOM: Do you like surveys?- yes Do you get along with your parents?- mostly Do you have mental breakdowns?- rarely CURRENT: Current mood?- Normal Current hair-style?- messy Current windows open?- fanfiction.net , gmail Current desktop picture?- a tree THE DIDS: Did you ever get into a fist-fight in school?- yes Did you ever run away from home?- No Did you ever want to be a doctor?- I wanna be a writer and a psychologist Did you ever want to be a firefighter?- nope THE DO'S: Do you know how to swim?- YA!!! Do you like roller-coasters?- HELL YEAH!!!! Do you own a bike?- yeah Do you think you could handle the stuff on reality shows?- depends which reality show you mean… THE DOES: Does hair loss run in your family?- Nope Does you car get good gas mileage?- no idea Does your family have family picnics?- no THE HAVES: Have you ever been on a plane?- Plenty of times Have you ever been to the ocean?- yes Have you ever painted your nails?- yes THE HOWS? How tall are you?- a bit over five foot How much money do you have right now?- no idea THE LASTS: The last person you hung out with? My sister Last thing someone said to you?: when my aunt rang she wanted to know how much my mum was spending on a tent Last thing you said out loud?- bye THE WHATS?: What are you listening to?- Some stupid show on TV What is the weather outside?- cold What radio station do you listen to?- I don’t know GOTHIC X Black is one of your favourite colors. X You wear chains. X Your hair was/is dark.(Naturally) Total: 3/8 PUNK X You can skateboard Total: 6/8 GEEK You love the computer. X You always do your homework. Total: 5/10 ATHLETIC X You watch/watched the Super bowl. (I watch AFL, that counts, right? Well I’m saying it does) Total: 2/9 Here's what ya do: mark your answers with a little 'x' in the () if its true, but BE HONEST (I was)!! Then copy and paste it onto your profile! 1 (x) Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were talking 3 (x) You have ran into a glass/screen door 4 () You have jumped out of a moving vehicle 5 (x) You have thought of something funny and laughed, then people gave you weird looks 16 () Your hair is blonde/dirty blonde 18 (x) You have accidentally caught something on fire (this one time, i was at my family friend's house and i was making pasta, but the pot had no handle, so i had to hold it with a tea towel. It was going fine, but then i was like *sniff sniff* 'hey, what's burning?' and it was the tea towel, because i caught it on the flame from the stove) 20 (x) You have caught yourself drooling 21 (x) You've fallen asleep in class 22 (x) Sometimes you just stop thinking 29 (x) You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn't realize it 30 (x) You've looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand or pocket(in some cases on your head!) 31 () You sometimes post bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen to you if you don't even when you know it won't happen to you, like on a myspace... 32 (x) You break a lot of things 33 () Your friends know not to use big words around you 34 () You sometimes tilt your head when you' re confused 37 () The word 'like' is used many times a day 38 (x) You called a friend and then completely forgot what you were gonna say 39 () You have spelled your name wrong Fake vs. Real FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Never ask for food. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Never seen you cry. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Know a few things about you. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Are for awhile. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours. Friends: Tell you that you look nice. Friends: Say "see you later!" Friends: Bail you out of jail. Friends: Forgive you. Friends: Politely refuse food. Friends: Are only through school. Friends: Laugh with you. Friends: Tell jokes with you. Friends: Tell you that you're the most annoying thing on earth. Friends: Would knock on your front door. Friends: You have to tell them not to tell. Friends: Will be there to take your drink away when they think you’ve had enough. Friends: comfort you when you fight with your boyfriend. Friends: bail you outta jail. Friends: tell you to forget it when you say you want to vandalize a guy's house. Friends: Think your insane for jumping off a roof onto a trampoline. Friends: come over every couple of months for a sleepover. Friends: are offended when you make fun of them. Friends: are shy around your boyfriend. Friends: don't see you if you're sick. Friends: dare you to scream into the street. Friends: call you retarded for running threw bleachers yelling "IT'S PICKLE TIME!" Friends: Will pick out a cute chick-flick to watch with you on movie night. Friends: Meet your boy/girl friend and say nice to meet you. Friends: Ask why you're crying. Friends: Annoy you. Friends: Forget you. Friends: Like you. -95% of teens would cry if they saw Justin Beiber standing on top of a sky scraper about to jump. If your one of the 5% who would sit there eating popcorn saying "DO A FLIP!!" Put this on your page [X] You have screamed at an inanimate object for "hurting you" so far: 5 ] you know that it IS possible to lick your elbow. so far: 8 ] You have seen the Matrix and still don't get it. so far: 12 [X] You have fallen asleep in class. so far: 16 [X] You use your fingers to do simple math. so far: 21 ] You have posted bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen if you don't. so far: 24 ] The word "um" is used frequently. Total: 26 % crazy... Cool. You Know You're Obsessed With Maximum Ride When... 1. You're friends think you're crazy for being obsessed with six flying kids and their talking dog. 2. You see someone in a white lab coat then run off screaming. (I think they a creeper...) 3. You've called one of your siblings/friends/family members Max, Fang, Iggy, Nudge, Gazzy, or Angel. 4. You refuse to talk to anyone who's named Ari. 5. You claim you have wings. (I DO have wings... Fake ones for cosplay...) 6. You drool when you hear the word 'Fang'. 7. You daydream about meeting the flock. 8. You've reread Maximum Ride about 3 times or more. (The forth one sucks) 9. You look for the flock's theme songs and get excited when you find one that fits perfect 10. You study about birds. 11. You hate science class/refuse to dissect any type of animal. (Disgusting... Makes me freak out and feel bad for the animal...) 12. You have a crush on Fang 13. You read Fang's blog daily. 14. You're waiting for your 'Nick Ride' 15. You are counting down the days for the next book. 16. You will go to the first opening for the movie, even if it's at midnight. (Who won't??) 17. You look in the mirror cautiously to make sure your reflection is not an Eraser. (Every once in a while) 18. You hate dog crates. (even DOGS hate dog crates) 19. You think scientists are evil. (Well, THEY ARE!!!) 20. You argue with people if Max is a girl's name or a guy's. (It's a non-gender specific name people, like ALEX or TAYLOR!!!) 21. When you’re spending the night at a friend's, you say you'll take first watch. 22. You've found a new respect for blind people. (Always respected them. But never pitied them) 23. You think MR is the best series ever 24. You say 'U and A’ a lot. (Specially with my friends) 25. You think you have a Voice like Max. 26. You've gotten your Online Friends hooked on it. 27. You use sarcastic remarks from MR. (I use threats from it too. I will rip out your spine and BEAT YOU WITH IT!!!!) 28. You know what 'Fax' is. (I LIVE FOR Fax) 29. You were one of the characters from MR for Halloween 30. You claim to have brain attacks. (I get a lot of head aches) (I do get them) 31. You protect your thoughts. Angel might be reading them. 32. You give a crazy look to people who don't know what MR is. (You don't know what MR is, you stupid in my books) 33. You daydream flying. 34. You love chocolate chip cookies. (doesn't EVERYBODY???) 35. You seriously felt like you were in the book. 36. If you want to become a writer because of MR. (It wasn't because of MR, but MR helped...) 37. If they make a poster, shirt, key-chain, button, anything MR you will buy it. (Where's my wallet, I saw a MR key-chain!!) 38. If you love Fan-fiction. (the MR part of it) 39. In school, it's hard to concentrate because you're thinking of Maximum Ride. 40. You want a talking dog. Girl Comebacks! Man: Where have you been all my life? Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Man: Is this seat empty? Man: Your place or mine? Man: So, what do you do for a living? Man: Hey baby, what's your sign? Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Man: Your body is like a temple. Man: I would go to the end of the world for you. Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together Man: Your eyes they're amazing. If you repost this you will get a phone call 37 minutes after you repost GIRLS REPOST THIS AS "female comebacks" If you have pulled a Max: You have made a snap decision and decided to do it without thinking it through first. If you have pulled a Fang: You have sneaked up behind someone without them noticing, making it seem like you came out of nowhere. If you have pulled an Iggy: You have run into an inanimate object without realizing it was there. This could include, poles, wall, doors, tables, etc. If You have pulled a Nudge: You have chattered endlessly without even realizing it. If you have pulled a Gazzy: You know who you are... If You have pulled an Angel: You have said what a person was about to say, almost like you read their mind... Truthfully, I've done all of these. If you have pulled any of these things, copy and paste it to your profile (x) Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were talking. (x) Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were NOT talking. (x) You have run into a glass/screen door. () You have jumped out of a moving vehicle. (x) You have thought of something funny and laughed, then people gave you weird looks. (x) You have run into a tree. () It IS possible to lick your elbow () You just tried to lick your elbow. (x) You never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star have the same rhythm. () You just tried to sing them. (x) You have tripped on your shoelace and fallen. (x) You have choked on your own spit. () You have seen the the Matrix and still don’t get it. () You didn’t notice that in the last question “the” was spelled twice () You just looked at it. ( ) Your hair is blonde/dirty blonde/has blonde in it. () People have called you slow. (x) You have accidentally caught something on fire (x) You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose/eyes/cheek. (x) You have caught yourself drooling. (x) You’ve fallen asleep in class () If someone says “fart” you laugh. (no, that’s Gazzy ur thinking of) () You just laughed. (x) Sometimes you just stop thinking (x) You tell a story and forget what you were talking about () People are often shaking their heads and walking away from you (x) You are often told to use your “inside voice”. (x) You use your fingers to do simple math. (x) You have eaten a bug. (x) You are taking this test when you should be doing something important (x) You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn’t realize it (x) You’ve looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand, pocket, head, etc. () You sometimes post bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen to you if you don’t even when you know it won’t happen to you. (x) You break a lot of things. () Your friends know not to use big words around you (x) You sometimes tilt your head when you’re confused (x) You have fallen out of your chair before (x) When you’re lying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture of the ceiling Death of an Innocent I went to a party, Mom, I remembered what you said. You told me not to drink, Mom, So I drank soda instead. I really felt proud inside, Mom, The way you said I would. I didn't drink and drive, Mom, Even though the others said I should. I know I did the right thing, Mom, I know you are always right. Now the party is finally ending, Mom, As everyone is driving out of sight. As I got into my car, Mom, I knew I'd get home in one piece. Because of the way you raised me, So responsible and sweet. I started to drive away, Mom, But as I pulled out into the road, The other car didn't see me, Mom, And hit me like a load. As I lay there on the pavement, Mom, I hear the policeman say, "The other guy is drunk," Mom, And now I'm the one who will pay. I'm lying here dying, Mom... I wish you'd get here soon. How could this happen to me, Mom? My life just burst like a balloon. There is blood all around me, Mom, And most of it is mine. I hear the medic say, Mom, I'll die in a short time. I just wanted to tell you, Mom, I swear I didn't drink. It was the others, Mom. The others didn't think. He was probably at the same party as I. The only difference is, he drank And I will die. Why do people drink, Mom? It can ruin your whole life. I'm feeling sharp pains now. Pains just like a knife. The guy who hit me is walking, Mom, And I don't think it's fair. I'm lying here dying And all he can do is stare. Tell my brother not to cry, Mom. Tell Daddy to be brave. And when I go to heaven, Mom, Put "Daddy's Girl" on my grave. Someone should have told him, Mom, Not to drink and drive. If only they had told him, Mom, I would still be alive. My breath is getting shorter, Mom. I'm becoming very scared. Please don't cry for me, Mom. When I needed you, you were always there. I have one last question, Mom. Before I say good bye. I didn't drink and drive, So why am I the one to die? I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian. I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman. I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights. We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time. I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room. I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me. I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again. I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear. We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men. I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me. I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman. I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman. I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male. I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men. I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that. I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual. I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me. I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind. I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love. I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male. Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it 93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile. i AM a freak though, WINGS, rebemmer/ (that was ment to be REMEMBER. god, my spellings worse than usual 2day) If yoo cant spel too sav yoor lyfe then putt thes in yoor profiele If you ever heard voices in your head, copy and paste this onto your profile. ((Its okay, most of them are pretty nice!)) If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile "A best friend rides in your car no matter how many times you nearly kill them." mostly cuz i make them :P Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an s in it? Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect to get it back! Do illiterate people get the full benefit of alphabet soup? Wouldn't it be fun to make the sticky stuff on envelopes taste like chocolate? If something goes without saying, why do people say it? Please note : Christmas is cancelled - apparently you told santa you were good this year ... and he died laughing Everything here is edible. I am edible, but, that, my children, is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies. "It's always in the last place you look" Duh! If you had already found it, why would you keep looking? I've got ADD and magic markers. Oh, the fun I will have! Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and then the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up. Whoever said "anything is possible" never tried to slam a revolving door. Confusion is a term for the stupid. I am NOT saying your stupid...I'm just implying it. I was gifted but the psychiatrist took away my powers Come to the dark side, we have cookies! Me: are they chocolate chip? Dark side: Uhh...sure... Me: COMING THROUGH! I ran with scissors and lived! ( i seriously think that one should be put on a t-shirt) You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff ... I laugh even harder I only have PMS on days that end with a Y I'm going on a quest, to the deepest, darkest corners of my room, in search of what some would call a "floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me my friends, wish me luck, for I may not return alive Life isn't passing me by - it's trying to run me over! Boys are like trees - they take 50yrs to grow up. It was a case of life and death - now that he's dead I have a life. Here's the rules: Get your Ipod, put it on shuffle and hit next to get the answer to each question, just put the title of the song, and no cheating, put whatever comes up. What's your name? Katy Perry- Waking Up In Vegas
What kinda people are you attracted to? Death Cab For Cutie- Meet Me On The Equinox Whats your style? Ladyhawke- Dusk till Dawn (well the artist's NAME is perfect, dont know about the song name though) What do you think about? The Noisettes- Sister Rosetta [2011 version] What's your goal in life? Katy Perry- Hot N cold What do you dream about? Futatsu no kodou to akai tsumi {Vampire Knight theme song] What kinda food do you like? Mia Maestro- Llovera Where do you live? Jennifer Rostock- Thunderclap What do you do when you wake up in the morning? The Pussy cat Dolls- Stickwitu What do you do on vacation? Adele- My Same What is your job? Anya Marina- Satellite heart If Obama called you on the phone what would you talk about? Katy Perry- I Kissed a Girl If you were the president of the United States? Natalie Bassingthwaighte- Someday Soon (does that mean i will be the president 'someday soon'? What's your motto? Fregie- Clumsy YOUR GUY SIDE - You like baggy clothes - Greasy food is your favorite -you love wearing hoodies - You watch sports and gripe at the Refs - You hang with friends and could care less of what people think - Your favorite color is either blue, red, green, black, or grey - You hate flowers - You love onion rings cuz come on, who doesnt like onion rings? - You go to your Dad for advice - You say, "Fun first, homework later" - You think dogs are better than cats - You have tons of hats (any kind) - You love action/comedies - You like watching your school's sports team - You think hunting and fishing should become an actual sport, and that cheerleadering is NOT a sport - You won't carry a purse for anyone - You're not afraid to show your sensitive side every now and then - You find your emotions cause it's none of your effin' business - You sleep with socks and shorts and a longsleeve shirt - You like Tommy Boy and Dumb and Dumber - You think Justin Bieber's gay - You laugh when people mess up - You help old women whenever they need it You play vidoe games still - You say "Suck it!" whenever someone ticks you off - You stand up for the people you like - You don't like it when people randomly stare - Girls who giggle and point freak you out - You eat with your hands sometimes - You talk with your mouth full - You laugh whenever you want - You don't care what people think - You eat relish on your hotdog - You snort like a hog when you laugh - You're stubborn as a mule, and don't stop till you like it - You love funny things - You hate shopping - You're so smart that you know how to act stupid, and you do - You love to make the people you love laugh YOUR GIRL SIDE - You carry a full bag of make-up around - You say "Ehmygawd" every two freakin' seconds - You love to shop - You wear pink all the time - You hate dark colors - You spend most of your time at the mall - It takes over an hour for you to get ready - You wear shorts that say "Juicy" on the butt - You stalk guys for no reason You can't stand to have someone outshine you You gossip WAY too much -You suck up to teachers so you won't get in trouble - You pay other girls to do your homework You hate action movies, and detst comedies unless there's a hot guy involved. You skip lunch to keep skinny - You wear make-up 24/7 - You're on the phone/computer 24/7 - You hate hamburgers - You think small things are cute - You make the guy you like jealous by flirting with his best friend - You love romances - Tall, dark, and handsome turns you on! (Only cuz that's how Fang is .) You jump around your room singing to Taylor Swift It makes you mad when bigger people where Dasiy Duke shorts You cry on sad songs total: 1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 81, Line 4. "your tattoo"explained the blonde. i must have still looked- bloodlines, Richelle mead 2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What can you touch? 3.What is the last thing you watched on TV? 4.Without looking, guess what time it is. 5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time? 6.With the exception of the computer what else can you hear? 7.When did you last step outside? What were you doing? 8.Before you started this survey what did you look at? 9.What are you wearing? 10. Did you dream last night? 11. When did you last laugh? 12. What is on the walls of the room you are in? pictures, the a.c, an old dried flower arrangement thingie and me and my sis's heights 13.Seen anything wierd lately? 14. What do you think of this quiz? 15. What is the last film you saw? 16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight. What would you buy? 17. Tell me something about you that I don't know. 18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do? 19. Do you like to dance? 20. George Bush: 21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her? 22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him? If at least 3 of your favourite characters have died, turned evil or left, copy this into your profile and add your name to the list along with the characters. SiriusDoctorWhoHoney329 (Sirius, Remus, Fred, Tonks, Murtagh, Lex Luthor, Riku, Spike, Atem, yeah, I'm really cursed, I'll update if I think of more), XObeautifulXdisasterXO (Charlie Pace, Adam, Will Turner, Cee, Claire Littleton, Sun, Rachel, Desmond?) Obiwanlivesforever (Padme, Shmi, Qui-Gon, Boba Fett, Beru Lars, Owen Lars, Bultar Swan, Kit Fisto, Anakin Skywalker, Boromir, Norrington, Governor Swann, probably Gillette, Edinburgh Trader dudes, Cedric, Colin, Lupin, Cypher, Warlock, Illyana (left and died), Prim, Cinna, Foxface, Madge, Maysilee, Finnick, Lavinia, Darius, Castor, Wiress, Bonnie, Twill, Boggs, Cecelia – but not Obi-Wan, ‘cause Obi-Wan lives forever) InkWeaverabc (Sirius, Remus, Tonks, Fred, Anakin, Murtagh, Will Turner, Farid (sort of left) I may think of more) TheOnlyMarauderette (Sirius, Remus, Tonks, Fred, Dobby, Brom, Murtagh - NOOO! Murtagh, how could you?- Prim, Rue, Finnick, Cinna, Qui-Gon, Padme, Silena, Beckendorf, Luke, Mr. Bliss, Tanith -you fans know what I mean *nudge nudge* end of 5th book *nudge nudge*-)bonifacio16, SymetricallyObsessed (Sirus, Remus, Tonks, Fred, Prim, Rue, Cinna, Will Turner, Elizibeth Swan, Flosam, Himalaya, Quentin, Anakin, Padme, Boromir, Boba Fett, Tanith Low (Way to piss me off Derek Landy) and too many others to count) the epic bookworm (Rue, Foxface, Cinna, Finnick, Madge, Prim, Tonks, Remus, Sirius, Fred, Boggs (What! I like Boggs!), Gavin, Coulter, Gale, and way too many others to count.) TheBeatlesFan4eva (Finnick, Rue, Prim, Tonks, Sirius, Remus, Fred, Snape, Dumbledore, Lavinia, Wiress, Bonnie, Twill, Mags, Dobby, Thresh, Cinna, and more), Kgirl235 (Finnick, Tonks, Fred, Foxface, Madge, Colin Creevey, Silena, and so many more), fallinghigher (Fang, Dobby, Dumbledore, Sirius, and more :'() Da Real Bella Cullen: Charlie Buckton (from Home and Away) Fang (tecnically he died once) and Nicole Franklin from home and away i hate the human id thing when u log in... im not human, im a BIRD KID!!!!!!!!!!! READ. You’re sitting in your room door locked with if you have a heart, u will re-post this 1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out 43/100 wow. 1. FIRST NAME: If I told you, I would have to kill you. 2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?no... OH WAIT yes! i named my last name after sally Ride 3. SIBLING NAMES: Iggy,Fang,Ella,Gazzy,Nudge,Angel 4. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY? Goodness, I don't know! 5. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDS? no? 6. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCHMEAT? ummmm 7. KIDS? wat do you think? 8. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? yes 9. DO YOU HAVE A JOURNAL? Kinda. but i never use it 10. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? No, of course not. 11. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yes. Useless things, they are. 12. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Hell to the yeah! 13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? dont eat it. i usually havr 2 minuet noodles for breakie. yum. yeh im weird like that. 14. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU REMOVE THEM? Nope. Mah Converse only. 15. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? umm?bird kid? remember? 16. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR? cookie dough from ben and jerrys 7. SHOE SIZE?idk 18. RED OR PINK? Red. 19. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOU? my hair. 20. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? my friend bree from the school 21. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO PUT THIS IN THERE PROFILE? Don't care. 22. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? no shoes light denim-y shorts 23. LAST THING YOU ATE? an ice block. i like ice blocks. is it possible to be addicted to them? 24. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?up 25. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Black. Because the black crayon is badass. 26. FAVORITE SMELL? idk. 27. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? My mum's friend/ friend's mum Cathy 28. FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE YOU ARE ATTRACTED TO? weather or not they have wings. 29. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Got it off the profile of a chick. Stalker, much? ;) 30. FAVORITE DRINK? lemonade! 31. FAVORITE SPORT? LOL, me, sport? 32. EYE COLOR? brown 33. HAT SIZE? What the h 34. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Nein! 35. FAVORITE FOOD? kfc. 36. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDING? Not bothered. 37. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED AT THE MOVIE THEATRE? alvin and the chipmunks 3 38. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING? My black dress thats got sort of a lacy pattern on the top and a mesh skirt.of my fave shirts: the say 'i didn't slap you i hi-fived ur face' 39. SUMMER OR WINTER? SUMMERSUMMERSUMMER. 40. HUGS OR KISSES? Not bothered. 41. FAVORITE DESSERT? ice cream. wait no CHOC CHIP COOKIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.) I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash. I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy. I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too. 1. What is your occupation? nothing 2. What are you listening to right now? Futatsu no Kodou to Akai Tsumi by on/off (its japanese and the vampire knight theme song) 3. What was the last thing you ate? cheese 4. How is the weather right now? sunny? 5. Favourite Drink? it's Coke! I'm addicted! 6. Favourite Sport? I'm not really in to sport 7. Have you ever dyed your hair? Yes, but only like, streaks and countless coulers... purple, red more red again and than blonde 8. Do you wear contacts or glasses? no 9. Pets? guinea pigs 10 what's your favourite T.V shows? simpsons futurama stoaked total drama vampire knight good game spawn point POKEMON 11. What's your favourite films? final destination bring it on mean girls... 12. What was the last movie you watched? idk 13. Favourite day of the year? idk 14. What do you do to vent anger? listen to my ipod. or bash an enemy... or a tree, or wall, or whatever 15. Fall or Spring? Uh, i don't know. 16. What's on the floor of your closet? Clothes 17. Favourite Smell? Hmmm. 18. What inspires you? People who have gone through a hard time and still do the right thing and get on with their lives. 19. What are you afraid of? Fear. 20. Favourite car? black lamborghini 21. Where are you? My bedroom. 22. Look up, now look back, what did you see? uhhhh the roof? 23. Stand up, close your eyes, spin around three times, open your eyes, what do you see? the door. 24. What's your personality like? Funny (so i hear), kind, friendly, helpful 25. Who do you have a crush on? noone. 26. You have a million dollars, what do you do? buy lots of stuff 27. Grab the closest thing to you, what is it? maximum ride book two 28. What are you eating/ drinking right now? nothing 29. Get a book, flick to page 57, line 19, and word 9. What does it say? I picked maximum ride book 2 "was" random... 30. Have a conversation with the closest person beside you, other than yourself. my little sis says 'Hi.' If you have your own little world, add this to your profile. If you can't read the word,djytshkyrshfusd, copy this to your profile If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile. I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do... If you have a tendency to talk to your self, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever walked into a room then forgot what you were doing, then started walking away and remembered copy this into your profile If you realize that copying and pasting stuff into one's profile is completely pointless, yet do it anyway, copy and paste this into your profile. A large percent of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're". If you're one of the ones who does know and wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile. i know the diff and i don't even go to school! If you think that people on commercials talk funny or use phrases no human beings would ever say, copy this into your profile. If you talk back to the TV, copy this into your profile. (Screaming does count.) If you've ever tripped over nothing, copy this into your profile. If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile. If you're against animal cruelty, copy and paste. If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the hell of it, copy this into your profile If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer. If you are obsessed with fan fiction copy this into your profile. If you have ever fallen up the stairs, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile. If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this into your profile. If you like chocolate as much as I do copy this into your profile. 98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you’re one of the 2 percent who hasn’t, copy & paste this into your profile. If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile If you have ever cried when your favorite character in a movie, T.V show, or book died, copy and paste this into your profile. 1. Your real name?: ebony jade 2.Your GaNgStA Name: (first 4 letters of real name)ebon 3. YOUR SPY NAME: (fav color and fav animal) blackdragon 4. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name) suteb 5. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (Your 2nd favorite color, and favorite drink) green cherry 6. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (parents middle names) Bridgete Andrew 7. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one of your pets) blacklolly If you have a story in your head, copy and paste this into your profile. If you like animals, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are a virgin, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think your insane because you say so, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think being random is screaming out common household objects, animals and foods, copy and paste this into your profile. If you only give reviews so people will review you, copy and paste this into your profile. If you only use examples from your own story, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think you go against the status quo, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever hated humanity as a whole, copy and paste this into your profile. Are you laughing? Isn't it funny an emo can be quiet all through the week, but gets more shit from everyone than the girl who sleeps around and sells her virginity? ISN'T IT FUNNY that you dont mind your friends drinking & smoking, but the minute someone mentions emomusic you can give them a lecture on melodramatic teenage outcasts? I'm not laughing. IT'S SO FUNNY that you and your friends can make a girl's life hell and not know anything about the silent battle she might be fighting. ISN'T IT FUNNY that you can call emos, punks, goths the retards, but still manage to get through your day without an inch of guilt in your heart? Are you still laughing? HOW YOU CAN CALL A GIRL A POSER, HOW CAN YOU SAY "YOUR NOT EMO" OR "ATTENTION SEEKER" WITHOUT SPENDING A SECOND TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHY THERE ARE CUTS ON HER WRISTS AND WHY SHE SPENDS HER LUNCHTIMES CRYING INSTEAD OF LAUGHING WITH HER FRIENDS? Isn't it funny you can say and do all this without any idea of what is going on in this persons life, without knowing her situation with her friends, or her family, or her LIFE? Keep on laughing. BRAVE ISN'T GOING UP ON STAGE AND STRIPPING. BRAVE IS NOT SAYING A SPEECH. OR DUMPING YOUR BOYFRIEND. BRAVE IS: GOING TO SCHOOL ON MUFTI DAY AND NOT FOR A SECOND CARE WHAT THE WHORES AROUND YOU ARE SAYING ABOUT YOUR CLOTHES. IT'S LISTENING TO YOUR OWN MUSIC AND BEING PROUD OF IT. IT'S GOING THROUGH EVERY DAY WITH THE THINGS PEOPLE SAY TO YOUR FACE AND BEHIND YOUR BACK AND YOU STILL KEEP QUIET. IT'S KNOWING WHAT YOUR "FRIENDS" ARE SAYING ABOUT YOU AND STILL CALLING THEM YOUR FRIENDS. BRAVE IS KNOWING THAT TOMOROW ISN'T A BRIGHT AND HAPPY FUTURE. IT'S ANOTHER DAY OF BITCHING AND DODGING RUMORS. KEEP ON LAUGHING! If you agree, copy and paste into your profile. A true friend I am not afraid of the dark, I am afraid of what is lurking in it. I am not afraid of heights, I am afraid of falling. I am not afraid of falling in love, I am afraid of not being loved back. 9 Things I Hate About Everyone: 1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.. I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is? 2 People who are willing to get off their butt to search the entire room for the T.V.. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually. 3 When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it? 4 When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it?! Do people do this? Who and where are they? I'm Gonna Kick their asses! 5 When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid 12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor. 6 People who ask "Can I ask you a question?". Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine? 7. When something is 'new and improved!' Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new. 8 When people say "life is short". What the heck?? Life is the longest darn thing anyone ever does!! What the fuck can you do that's longer? 9 When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass? Find a guy whos calls you beautiful instead of hot, Who calls you back when you hang up on him, Who will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead, Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats, Who holds your hand in public and in front of his friends and family. Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he loves you and how lucky he is to have you. If you think that describes Fang copy it into your profile. Girl: Do I ever cross your mind? Boy: No Girl: Do you like me? Boy: No Girl: Do you want me? Boy: No Girl: Would you cry if I left? Boy: No Girl: Would you live for me? Boy: No Girl: Would you do anything for me? Boy: No Girl: Choose--me or your life Boy: My life The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says... The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind. The reason why I don't like you is because I love you. The reason I don't want you is because I need you. The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left. The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you. The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you. The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life. If you find this incredibly cute and touching, copy and paste it into your profile A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle Girl: Slow down, I'm scared! Guy: No, this is fun. Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared. Guy: Then tell me you love me. Girl: I love you, now slow down! Guy: Now give me a big hug. She gives him a big hug Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me. In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she could live. If you would do this for a loved one copy and paste. The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism Girls 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. 2. My mother taught me RELIGION. 3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. 4. My mother taught me LOGIC. 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. 7. My mother taught t me IRONY. 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. 11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. 12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. 13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. 14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. 15. My mother taught me about ENVY. 16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION . 17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. 18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. 19. My mother taught me ESP. 20. My mother taught me HUMOR. 21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. 22. My mother taught me GENETICS. 23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. 24. My mother taught me WISDOM. 25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE. Funny Stuff Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up. Friend's will always be like “well you deserve better” but best friends will be prank calling him saying “you will die in seven days” Boys are like trees-they take 50 years to grow up. EMO kids have cool hair. EMO=Extravagantly Made Origami BEARS=Butt Extremely Annoying Retard Scientists “Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you’re a mile away from them and you have their shoes.” Excuse me... have you seen my sanity... I think I lost it. Why is Donkey Kong called “DONKEY” Kong if he’s a monkey? If your name is Mr. Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch? 364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried slamming a revolving door... No, I don’t have PMS. I just really hate you. My mind works like lightning, one brilliant flash and it’s gone. Stupidity is not a crime so you’re free to go. “Hey guess who this is? You guessed it. Guess what you have to do now? You “Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.” “An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.” Life isn’t passing me by, it’s trying to run me over. Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it. Was that an earthquake, or did I just rock your world? My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil. Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary. Did you know Sarcasm is your body’s natural defense against stupidity? Never knock on Death’s door, ring the doorbell and run away, he hate that. Paper may beat rock, but cannon ball make big hole in paper. The pen may be mightier than the sword, but my keyboard can crush your crummy pen! Therapist = the/rapist... scary thought. Don’t call me emo or I’ll cry big juicy tears of blood and pain and then I’ll die and it will be ALL YOUR FAULT. Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out. I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it! Last night I looked up at the stars and matched each star to a reason I loved you. I was doing fine till I ran out of stars. To the world, you are just one person, but to one person, you are the world. Charm is a way of getting the answer yes without asking a clear question. Some minds are like concrete; thoroughly mixed and permanently set. The town was so dull that when the tide went out it refused to come back in. Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. Tell the truth and run. Don’t follow me, I’m lost too. This is Bob. Bob likes sharp things. I suggest you run from Bob. Definition of Your Mom: How to answer a question when you’re bored Definition of homework: Some form of crude mind control still used in some primitive areas. One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions. WARNING: Do NOT walk in my footsteps... I tend to walk into walls, and off the occasional cliff. I’m not afraid of Death, what’s it gonna do kill me? I’ll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter. When life gives you lemons, chuck them at people you hate. It doesn’t matter whether the glass is half empty or half full just drink it and get it over with. It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone. The world is full of crazy people. THEY MADE ME THEIR LEADER. So what if we act like immature idiots? We’re having fun. If at first you don’t succeed skydiving isn’t for you. Those who throw objects at crocodiles will be asked to retrieve them. Set sail in a general that way direction. It’s always the last place you look. Of course it is why would I keep looking after I’ve found it? I’m sick of following my dreams, I’m just gonna ask where they're going and hook up with them later. Do I have to spell it out for you or scream it in you face? All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative. When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear. Education is important, school however, is another matter. What happens if you get scared half to death twice? I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound as they go by. Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic... Music is love in search of word. Are children who act in rated ‘R’ movies allowed to see them? Whose cruel idea was it for the words ‘lisp’ to have an‘s’ in it? How is it possible to have a civil war? When French people swear do they say pardon my English? Aren’t the ‘good things that come to those who wait’ just the leftovers from the people that got there first? If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later? Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out”? Who was the first person to say, “See that chicken over there ... I’m gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt”? Isn’t Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse? If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible? Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse? “Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?” Isn’t it funny how the word ‘politics’ is made up of the words ‘poli’ meaning ‘many’ in Latin, and ‘tics’ as in ‘bloodsucking creatures’? Why isn’t chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from cocoa Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin? Why is it when some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down? Why do people say, “You can’t have your cake and eat it too”? Why would someone get cake if they can’t eat it? “When life hand you lemons, throw those lemons right back at it and tell life to make its own dang lemonade” Assassination is an extreme form of censorship. The sun has set, the moon has risen, today’s the day we get out of prison!! You say I’m not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I’m not cold, I’m hot. I know I’m hot. Thanks for embracing it. Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much. If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something. Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, and then kill them. Don’t mess with me I’ve got a stick. He said I love you, I sneezed and said sorry I’m allergic to bullshit. I’ll be rich and famous when I invent something that will stab people over the internet. You’re just jealous because we act retarded in public and people still love us! Darth Vader- "Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!" I smile because I have no idea what’s going on! Life was so simple when boys had cooties I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends Boys are like slinkies, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs. I ran with scissors, and lived! You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder I’m the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday. When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n’ slide. I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love. I don’t obsess! I think intensely. Of course I’m talking to myself. Who else can I trust? Let me know if anything I say offends you, I might wanna offend you later. One way to figure out how things work, push all the buttons! I’m so gangster, I carry a squirt gun. When I say LOL I’m not laughing out laud. I just have nothing better to say. When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Ask Harry if his scar senses are tingling When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Sing “I’m Off to See the Wizard” when sent to the Headmasters office. I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers. All the good ones are gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies. The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you. “When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.” “Those who don’t learn from history are doomed to repeat it.” “Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else” “Real girls aren’t perfect, perfect girls aren’t real.” “I’d rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I’m not.” “What is easy is not always right, and what is right is not always easy.” “Guns don’t kill people. I do.” “A good friend bails you out of jail. A great friend is sitting there next to you saying ‘Man, that was fun!’” “If you can’t see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.” Bush gave an interview and he said people will vote for him because ‘They’ve seen me weep, they’ve seen me laugh, and they’ve seen me hug.’ These are the same qualifications for a Tickle Me Elmo. A recent survey stated that the average person’s greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you’re telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy. I’m not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? Death is God’s way of saying “You’re fired.” If ya can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. Unfortunately, you can’t die of a broken heart. Heaven doesn’t want me, and Hell’s afraid I’ll take over. “He who stands on a windowsill to see how far out he can lean without falling is a moron.” “If you know me, chances are you hate me.” “I’m the kind of person your parents warned you about.” “Why are some girls so naive? He didn’t unbutton your shirt to see a better view of your heart.” “When you’re down I may not be able to pick you back up but I promise I’ll be willing to lay down right next to you” “Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but words will hurt my inner child” “Don’t judge a book by its cover or a person by their scars” “It’s not until you’re broken that you know what you’re made of.” “Tired of living and scared of dying.” “It requires MORE courage to suffer than to die.” “You said that you would die for me, you must live for me too”. “To die is nothing but a long goodbye.” “This isn’t just goodbye, this is I can’t stand you.” “I hear your silence loud and clear.” “The past is only the future with the lights on.” “Shut up voices or I’ll poke you with a fork | |||||||
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