Hey everyone! Okay, okay, I know I should be working on Meet the Parents. But I've been re-reading Harry Potter and this annoying idea won't leave me alone. Besides, I gave you guys four chapters of Meet the Parents in ten days, what more do you want?

But anyway. I know that Jo said that she herself had considered this but then decided that magic DNA wouldn't be able to get through Vernon, but whatever. I also know that canonically, Dudley has two kids, but still.

Also, I must credit hp-headcanon on tumblr, because this story is based on number 149 from their blog. (Only I switched the gender of Dudley's kid.)

Dudley's daughter is entirely my creation. Her name is Alexandria, or Ali, for short, and she is the same age as Lily Luna.

Alexandria's POV

I was watching cartoons with my dad and eating cereal when I heard the mail come in.

"Ali, get the mail please."

I got up and put my cereal bowl in the dishwasher before collecting the mail and returning to the lounge room. I sat on the couch and filled through the letters as my dad sat next to me, drinking a cup of tea. One of my friends was on holiday in Australia and she had promised to send me a postcard. Today's mail was all bills, except for one. It was large and yellow and thick. Whoever had written it had used bright green ink.

Miss Alexandria Dursley,
12 Brennan Court,
Mayfair,
London.

I turned it over, frowning. The back was sealed by a blob of red wax, with the letter H on it. As I was about to peel it open, my father glanced down at it. He gasped and dropped his tea, the mug smashing of the hardwood floors.

He put his hand to his mouth. "Oh my god."

I gave him a questioning look, but before I could speak, he held up his hand and silently reached for the phone, dialling a number by heart.

"Hello, Harry?"

I could hear a women's voice on the other side. Dad's face fell.

"Oh. Well could you please tell him to come to my house as soon as possible? It's really, really important. Thanks, Ginny."

"Dad? What's going on?"

"You can't read that letter yet, Alexandria. My cousin Harry will be here to explain everything soon."

This just made me even more confused. Harry? What could my letter possibly have to do with him? I hadn't even seen him since I was a toddler and from what I knew, him and my dad never got along when they were little.

"Dad, please can I just read it? Please?"

"Ali, I'm sorry, but no. He will be able to explain it better than I ever could."

"Fiiine."

"Look, honey, why don't you do something else while we wait for him? You could practice your violin, I know you love that."

"But… What about school?"

He sighed and rubbed his forehead. "You don't have to go today. You can stay home. I'm not going to work either."

I bit my lip. Whatever it was, it had to be serious, or else I wouldn't be allowed to skip school.

An hour later, there was a knock at the front door. I put my violin down on my bed and practically flew out of the room, down the stairs and to the door. I flung it open. A man with messy black hair, green eyes, round glasses and an oddly shaped scar was wiping his feet on the welcome mat.

"Hi Harry."

"Hello Alexandria."

"Um… Come in. You can call me Ali, by the way."

He grinned. "Sure thing, Ali. Is your father around?"

I nodded and led him into the the lounge room, where dad had been pacing for the last hour. I was then sent out of the room, but instead of leaving, I looked in through the crack between the door.

"Harry! Thank God you're here! I know we're not exactly close, but I really need your help right now. Something… Something came for Ali in the mail this morning." He handed the letter over.

Uncle Harry stared at it, and chuckled. "I'll help Dudley… If I can be in the room when you tell Vernon."

"Sure, anything, just please, I don't know what to do!"

"Has she opened it yet?"

My father shook his head. "I thought it would be better to wait for you to get here. You know, in case she has any questions."

Harry nodded. "That makes sense. And I'd be happy to talk to her and explain everything."

I quickly ran to the kitchen and pretended to be rummaging through the pantry.

My dad's voice came from the lounge. "Ali, can you come here please? Harry has some things he wants to talk to you about."

I entered the lounge room and sat on the couch, facing my second cousin.

"Ali, have you ever made anything strange happen? Things you can't explain?"

"What? No, that doesn't make any sense!"

But as I thought about it, I realised that I had made some strange things happen. Like the time I badly broke my leg a week before we were supposed to go on holiday to Disneyland and had woken up in hospital the next morning completely healed. Or the time the school bully had tried to smash my violin against a wall and instead of breaking, it had bounced off the brick like rubber and smacked him in the face. He'd had a broken nose but my violin wasn't even scratched.

"But I didn't make them happen, that's not possible! It's not like I can do magic, that's just stupid, magic isn't real!"

He bit his lip. "Well…"

I looked at him, gaping. Obviously, he was crazy.

My father shook his head. "Just show her Harry."

"What should I show her?"

"What? I don't know, anything!"

Harry shrugged, reached into his coat and pulled out what looked like a wood stick. He made a circle motion with its do said something that sounded like 'expect oh patrol numb' a silver mist shaped like a deer came out of the end of the stick. I gasped.

"you're…you're…"

"A wizard, yes. And you Ali, are a witch."

I looked at my father. "Does that mean you're one too?"

He shook his head. "No, just Harry and his mother, my aunt Lily."

"But… what's in the letter, then?"

He handed it back to me. "It's your acceptance letter from Hogwarts, a magic school for wizard and witch children. I got one when I was your age."

"But how can I go to a school like that? I don't know anything about it!"

"You'll be fine, a lot of kids don't know about it before they get their letter. And I'll teach you everything you need to know before you start."

"Well, okay. But I won't know anyone there, I'll be all alone" But I was still terrified.

"Don't worry Ali. My daughter Lily, your cousin, is the same age as you are. She got her letter yesterday. She'll look after you. And will all your other cousins."

"Really?"

Harry nodded and turned to my dad. "Listen, Dudley, it's going to be hard traveling all the time. I think it might be best if you guys stayed at my house for a few days, at least. Just till we get this sorted you. You can have the guest room and Ali can sleep in Lily's room, so they can get to know each other before school starts. It that okay?"

My dad nodded vigorously. "Sure, sure. Anything you need, just help Ali."

So that's that! I will probably write more, like hanging out with Lily and going to Diagon Alley and going to Hogwarts. But don't be upset it it takes a long time. I'm trying to stay on top of my Zootopia fic, and starting another one with regular posts doesn't sound like the most helpful thing at the moment.