Clodia
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Joined 10-29-08, id: 1728556, Profile Updated: 03-14-15
Author has written 10 stories for Silmarillion, and Lord of the Rings.

I like alliteration. This is not a sin. I also like subtlety. One day I hope to achieve it. All of my stories are connected to some extent; it certainly shouldn't be necessary to read everything, but occasionally it might help

Some of my stories are also posted under the same penname at the Silmarillion Writers' Guild, Stories of Arda and A03; all of my stories, including some not posted here, can be found on my LJ: clodia_metelli. If you look around FFN, you may notice I have a frivolous twin as well; you might like to see what he has to say, especially if you're interested in Good Omens, but don't take him too seriously, will you?

Concrit, questions and general conversation are welcome everywhere, especially on LJ. I'm a friendly person, feel free to drop by. Feedback is love. But in any case, if you've glanced at my stories, thank you for reading!

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Pebbles From Arda by Virtuella reviews
A collection of shorter stories. Chapter 17: "The Tale of Arwen and Aragorn Part II" - a silly take on royal weddings. Ch 18: Rambling at Dol Amroth, a B2MEME photo prompt response.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 18 - Words: 16,124 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 8/14/2015 - Published: 7/6/2008 - Gandalf, Aragorn, Arwen U., Faramir
Ptribute to Pterry by Virtuella reviews
All stories have to happen somewhere. And so it emerges...
Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 820 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/14/2015 - Complete
The King And I by Rumpleteasza reviews
One Queen. Two Kings. Murder, treason, conspiracy... Well, what more could one expect from the royal family of Mournhold née Wayrest? The story of Bethesda's lost character, spanning all the way from Arena to Oblivion.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Mystery - Chapters: 43 - Words: 117,831 - Reviews: 118 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 2/12/2014 - Published: 6/6/2005 - Complete
Tripping by the ersatz diplomat reviews
"It's not flirting. It's witty repartee." Harry Dresden rejects your reality and substitutes his own. Rated for language, unintentional drug use and offscreen violence. Warnings for absurd premise, creative anachronism and mentions of David Bowie.
Dresden Files - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,627 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 108 - Follows: 20 - Published: 2/29/2012 - H. Dresden, K. Murphy - Complete
Crutches by Musafreen reviews
"...it wasn't their fault she was slightly insane and he was a life-force devouring creature of the night." Thomas and Justine. Twenty-six themes, A to Z.
Dresden Files - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,104 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 7/14/2011 - Published: 9/13/2010 - Thomas R.
Guidelines by Morrigan's Wings reviews
For the sanity of everyone involved, learn the rules.
Dresden Files - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 797 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/4/2011 - Complete
Oh No! Another Lord of the Rings Parody? by Kitt Otter reviews
'Fraid so. Frodo's a stinker and Bilbo's worse. Sauron's beard is pointy and his minions wield chainsaws. Aragorn couldn't find his nose in the dark. And the worst of it…? Gandalf owes me money. MEFA 2010 nominee; thanks Clodia!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 24,177 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 1/17/2011 - Published: 6/12/2008 - Frodo B.
Within a Shadowed Forest by Gogol reviews
AU. Adam… succumbs to his inner Son of Satan, when the time comes. Adam being Adam, this still involves a little rewriting of the Plan. Written for the 2010 go exchange.
Good Omens - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 29,187 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 1/16/2011 - Published: 1/4/2011 - Adam Young
Lobelia Sackville Baggins Is Dead by Virtuella reviews
A Shire Murder Mystery in three parts.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Crime/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,389 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 10/2/2010 - Published: 9/23/2010 - Samwise G., Meriadoc B., Peregrin T. - Complete
Saving Grace by Gimme Mocha reviews
Grace Bowden is still a small-time witch, but that's enough to put her square in the sights of a serial killer whose path of destruction has brought him to Chicago. White Night spoilers!
Dresden Files - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16,146 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 16 - Published: 9/17/2010 - Thomas R. - Complete
Withered Tree by Altariel reviews
A penny for the Old Guy... An AU set in Minas Tirith.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 16,456 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 3 - Published: 9/8/2010 - Denethor, Faramir
Rest, Recuperation, and Reanimation by Gogol reviews
After leaving the minds of men whereto they were banished, and making their way back into the world, the Horsepersons camp out at the Tadfield Manor Conference and Management Training Center.
Good Omens - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,906 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/30/2010 - Sister Mary Loquacious - Complete
Dead Man's Witch by Gimme Mocha reviews
Grace Bowden, small-time Chicago witch, is contacted to help with a ghost problem. She just wants to help the boy-ghost, but when her path crosses that of Harry Dresden, she'll need more than good intentions to get out of it alive. Set during Dead Beat!
Dresden Files - Rated: T - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 23,585 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 123 - Follows: 33 - Published: 6/29/2010 - Complete
Mountain Guards by Malicean reviews
"In place of a Dark Lord, you would have a queen, not dark but beautiful and terrible as the dawn! Treacherous as the sea! Stronger than the foundations of the earth! All shall love me and despair." Love… not exactly. Despair… like hell! 2010 MEFA Nominee
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Angst - Chapters: 6 - Words: 25,497 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 4/19/2010 - Published: 4/20/2006
Orcs in Hobbiton by The Lauderdale reviews
AU. Two years after Sauron won the war, his Orcs come to a Shire under Saruman's dominion. The hobbits who dwell there are caught in the middle. Told in drabbles & drabble-increments. ADDED: "Apple Time." Amelia Chubb is picking apples for the first time.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Drama - Chapters: 13 - Words: 4,579 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 4/18/2010 - Published: 3/28/2010 - Saruman, Grima W., Orc, Fredegar B.
Lord of the Facebook: Return of the Friend Request by aotearoan reviews
The Return of the King told through the characters' Facebook accounts. The third instalment of the Lord of the Facebook Statuses follows on from The Two Notifications and the Fellowship of the Facebook Status . Yes, Tolkien is spinning in his grave.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 11,852 - Reviews: 280 - Favs: 145 - Follows: 62 - Updated: 3/3/2010 - Published: 12/11/2009 - Aragorn, Frodo B. - Complete
Orcs At School by Virtuella reviews
Because little orcs need to learn, too. MEFA 2010 First Place.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,876 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/15/2010 - Complete
Valkyrie by Cinnamon Plum reviews
Even the Dispossessed have their rescuers in death. Conceptual, technically AU. A drabble in 100 words.
Silmarillion - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 125 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 3 - Published: 1/29/2010 - Complete
The Ottyssey by Kitt Otter reviews
After a freak accident involving a tongue and a voltmeter, I find myself facedown in Arda dirt, in the body of a water-weasel. And with nothing better to do, I take on the burden of making the Fellowship's lives miserable.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 34,283 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 11/16/2009 - Published: 1/29/2009 - Frodo B., Gandalf - Complete
Solidarity by anactoria reviews
It's 1992 and this isn't Utopia. Dan/Adrian, SLASH.
Watchmen - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 45,707 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 11/12/2009 - Published: 6/6/2009 - Adrian V./Ozymandias, Dan D./Nite Owl - Complete
Knife's Edge by Rumpleteasza reviews
What about the Orcs' story? Who tells that? And what if, when Saruman was mixing Orcs and men to make his perfect Uruk Hai, he let some good in with the bad?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,901 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 9/23/2009 - Published: 7/28/2009 - Uruk-hai, Orc, Saruman - Complete
Within a Dark Wood by Marchwriter reviews
"The tale of Túrin is known to many of this company… but…tonight is not the night to tell it. So I will tell you another tale. One that, perhaps, not even the eldest amongst our little company has yet heard." So the storyteller began…
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,155 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/15/2009 - Complete
Shades of Black and Grey by Min Daae reviews
Does Huan ever think of his first master?
Silmarillion - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,795 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 12 - Published: 8/15/2009 - Complete
Dispossessed by Min Daae reviews
Shortshort AU; in which Dior did give the Silmaril back to the Sons of Feanor. And it's already too late.
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 355 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 12 - Published: 8/9/2009 - Complete
July 1st by Celixir reviews
The Star of Elendil disappears under suspicious circumstances during a dinner party, and it is up to Gandalf to finger the guilty.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Mystery/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,000 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 8 - Published: 8/1/2009 - Legolas, Gandalf - Complete
Monty Python's 'The Hobbit' by Morthoron reviews
A perfectly punctuated Python parody of JRR Tolkien's beloved The Hobbit. Join Bilbo Baggins' quest to free Erebor from Smaug the dragon before a lethal strain of comedy kills him. 3RD PLACE, 2009 MEFA AWARDS, with the top two spots left purposely blank.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 28 - Words: 50,214 - Reviews: 85 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 7/4/2009 - Published: 12/21/2008 - Bilbo B., Gandalf - Complete
Ships That Pass In the Night by Thranduil Oropherion Redux reviews
You think you've got troubles? Two strangers meet in a little tavern on the island of Tortuga and swap stories.
Crossover - Silmarillion & Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,845 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/2/2009 - Will T. - Complete
The importance of index cards by A.A. Pessimal reviews
Following a magical accident at the Library, Sergeant A.E. Pessimal of the Watch is sent to where nobody has ever returned alive. Can Pessimal become the first to return from the grip of a denizen of the Dungeon Dimensions? Apologies to H.P. Lovecraft...
Discworld - Rated: K - English - Horror/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,035 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 6 - Published: 6/14/2009 - Complete
Mandos by Min Daae reviews
Going slowly mad. A much less cheerful afterlife than my other one. In which death sucks even more than life did.
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,118 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/14/2009 - Complete
The Ape and the Angel by InsanityInside reviews
Apparently the place where the ape meets the angel is... some sort of library.
Crossover - Discworld & Good Omens - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 797 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 5 - Published: 5/26/2009 - The Librarian, Aziraphale - Complete
Like Gravity, Like Love by Lyra Ngalia reviews
Justine reflects on how the events of Turn Coat have changed the man she loves. Spoilers for Turn Coat.
Dresden Files - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,441 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/5/2009 - Complete
Happy Birthday by A.A. Pessimal reviews
well, Terry Pratchett started it... when a character suspiciously like Gollum slithered into a cameo role in "Witches Abroad". And after meeting Discworld witches, probably wishes he hadn't. Gollum's further adventures on the Discworld.
Crossover - Discworld & Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 249 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 11 - Published: 4/30/2009 - Gollum
Six Things You Never Knew About the Discworld by Merlin Missy reviews
On wishing, dating, literary pursuits, kingship, and Large Bubbling Baths With Water Pumped Through Jets And Attached Loofa .
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,286 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/29/2009 - Complete
Let Them Drop Dead by The Divine Comedian reviews
Monstrous Regiment. Of all the battles, one has got to be the last. Mal, Polly, OCs.
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,312 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Published: 3/27/2009 - Complete
Dress Up by Qualapec the She-Wolf reviews
Molly plays dress up. Because we all know the duster is the coolest part of the outfit.
Dresden Files - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,261 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 187 - Follows: 42 - Published: 2/6/2009 - Complete
The Vetissey by Virtuella reviews
Through the petty revenge of a jilted opera singer, Lord Vetinari and his new wife find themselves lost at sea. It looks fishy, and Vimes decides to find out the truth. Sequel to A Winter's Tale, set post-MM.
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 16 - Words: 57,863 - Reviews: 144 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 1/6/2009 - Published: 8/6/2008 - Vetinari, Sam Vimes - Complete
Love By Numbers by eruthiel reviews
Oneshot. Drumknott comes to work and find a half-conscious Moist von Lipwig outside the Patrician's study. They end up discussing the new girl at the palace.
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,235 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/29/2008 - Complete
Divine Intervention by A. Meril reviews
For you are goddesses, inside on everything, know everything. But we mortals hear only the news, and know nothing at all. --Homer
Silmarillion - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,033 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/22/2008
Whom They Fear by teh Michiru reviews
Thingol warns that Morgoth has used seemingly escaped prisoners to his advantage before. Fingon does not appreciate the implications.
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Angst/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,438 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 7 - Published: 8/5/2008 - Complete
The Perils Of Smoking Out Back by Gogol reviews
It wasn't even as if Vimes liked cigarettes. But, well, you had to respect the timing. And after all, nicotine was nicotine. Right? *This fanfiction sponsored by Pantweed's Slim Panatellas -tm-*
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,613 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 6 - Published: 7/1/2008 - Complete
The Unsung Sorrow by Virtuella reviews
The War of the Ring is over, but all is not well. A look at the losses of the unnamed and unknown. 2008 MEFA 2nd place in combination with Tales of Promise
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,563 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 5/23/2008 - Published: 5/16/2008 - Complete
Pencils by Goonlalagoon reviews
Random story about Drumknott and his rapidly diminishing supply of pencils. Set after Making Money.
Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 844 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 3/30/2008 - Published: 3/18/2008 - Drumknott, Moist von L. - Complete
Cirdan's Beard by Lalaeth reviews
Did you ever wonder why Cirdan, alone of all the Elves of Middle-earth, had a beard? You would not be the only one.
Silmarillion - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,043 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 4 - Published: 2/11/2008 - Complete
Wings by CarolingianTortoise reviews
The real explanation for two of Middle-Earth's most pressing mysteries.
Silmarillion - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 243 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 14 - Published: 1/31/2008 - Complete
Leave It to Beavers by Erestor reviews
A concussed elfprince, a bored ranger of the north, and a disgruntled beaver are pitted against each other in a battle of... well, not wits, in this case. Forest fires rage, tomatoes hurtle through the air, and Erestor really couldn't care less. A parody.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,756 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 7/30/2007 - Published: 7/23/2007 - Aragorn, Legolas - Complete
When Summoning, Please Watch The Wording by Ryuuza Kochou reviews
Dean and Sam fall into the hands of Satanists, who, naturally, want to use Sam as the vessel for the Golden Eyed Demon. Well...they do get A Certain Golden Eyed Demon. And an avenging Angel. And a serious posterior whooping. Good Omens Crossover
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Humor/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,447 - Reviews: 241 - Favs: 2,195 - Follows: 304 - Published: 5/20/2007 - Dean W., Sam W. - Complete
The Most Beautiful by A. Meril reviews
Melian has reasons for staying.
Silmarillion - Rated: K - English - Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 691 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/6/2007 - Complete
Letters to Granny by Anidori-Kiladra reviews
AU. This series of letters detail the life of Sméagol after the events of Return of the King as he struggles with his multiple personalities and attempts to find happiness in Mount Doom by marrying an orc and opening a Bed and Breakfast.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 10,572 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 9 - Updated: 1/30/2007 - Published: 1/1/2007 - Smeagol, Gollum - Complete
A Measure of Tyranny by TheMidgetBee reviews
A barbarian hero has arrived in a city under the thrall of an evil tyrant with the intention of freeing it once and for all. Unfortunately, he picked AnkhMorpork...
Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 13,735 - Reviews: 93 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 1/24/2007 - Published: 11/29/2006 - Complete
Comes Now the Plaintiff by EdorasLass reviews
The Ringbearer has filed suit against those who, by action or lack of action, cause him to come to grievous mental & physical harm
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,494 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/10/2006 - Frodo B. - Complete
A Taste of Disaster by Nili reviews
Elrond is fed up with all the catastrophes and has come up with a solution. It does not really work, and so the next kidnapping is inevitable. Now Elrond is annoyed, Aragorn and Legolas are bored – and the kidnappers quickly see that they made a mistake.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 37,576 - Reviews: 164 - Favs: 306 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 9/21/2006 - Published: 8/28/2006 - Aragorn, Legolas - Complete
MY Silmaril! by sistertotherain reviews
The children of Amon Ereb invent a new game, to the dismay of the Sons of Feanor.
Silmarillion - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,360 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 8 - Published: 9/20/2006 - Complete
Wise Counsel by Ghyste reviews
What? You thought all that stuff at the Council of Elrond just happened by itself?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 589 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 90 - Follows: 14 - Published: 3/4/2006 - Elrond, Erestor - Complete
The Paths of the Dead by Laiqualaurelote reviews
LotR meets Discworld. Oneshot based on a dream of my sister's. Aragorn enters the wrong world on the Paths of the Dead and has to make do with a very unexpected army.
Discworld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,465 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/31/2005 - Complete
Hador by fanged geranium reviews
Fingon wants to know why Fingolfin has taken Dorlómin away from him and given it to Hador instead. Complete.
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 1,126 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 5 - Updated: 11/8/2005 - Published: 10/21/2005 - Complete
On All Hallow's Eve by Avalon Estel reviews
Halloween in Rivendell is usually a time that Lord Elrond dreads. But this year, it's going to be different. Very, very different. Cowritten with Erestor. [Oneshot: Complete]
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,655 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 15 - Published: 10/31/2005 - Glorfindel, Elrond - Complete
Welcome to Valinor by fanged geranium reviews
The Valinorian Immigration Department can't let just anyone in.
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 1,594 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 10/28/2005 - Published: 10/7/2005
So You Want to Write a Tolkien Fanfic? by SickleYield reviews
Humorous guide to writing like a neurotic misogynist Englishman. Not that I think all Englishmen are neurotic misogynists. I freely admit that all the neurotic misogynists I know are American. Complete with one or two expansions.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,331 - Reviews: 85 - Favs: 125 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 9/15/2005 - Published: 9/13/2005 - Complete
All About Elrond by Erestor reviews
Elrond, saddened by the lack of meaningful angst about him, asks Erestor to write a tragic vignette. Pain, suffering, and gratuitous amnesia ensue. REVISED August '06.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,244 - Reviews: 79 - Favs: 88 - Follows: 11 - Published: 4/23/2005 - Elrond, Erestor - Complete
Comfort Me Not With Cookies by Raksha The Demon reviews
Being the condensed version of an epic tale that I would never, ever write! Faramir Angst! Legolas-passion! A plucky OFC! It's a movie-verse AU parody, for your viewing pleasure. Complete.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,387 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/31/2005 - Faramir - Complete
Morgoth's Notebook by Arandil reviews
Found in the ruins of what was once Angband. The original Dark Lord had quite the knack for badfic writing (and apparently a little "thing" for Fëanor). This is his notebook of ideas. Read at your own risk. Transcribed by Arandil for the HASA Challenge: Confessions of a Dangerous Mind. Winner: "The Merry and Pippin Award (Humor 2nd Place)" MEFA 2005
Silmarillion - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 13 - Words: 7,426 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 10/27/2004 - Published: 8/25/2004 - Morgoth, Fëanor - Complete
Silmarillion: Owner's Guides & Maintenance Manuals by Tenshi Androgynous reviews
Are now in story format! Join the quest of our heroine as she seeks the Lost Scrolls, but finds something unexpected along the way! Complete guides featured: Finrod, Túrin, Eöl, Maedhros & Fingon. MAEDHROS and FINGON now up at long last!
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 4 - Words: 12,481 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 4/12/2004 - Published: 4/9/2004 - Complete
The Ghostly Ones by Le Chat Noir reviews
The strange love story of Nimloth and Dior, with a certain twist... to be blamed *all* on Silmfics. Sheesh, these persons have ideas which are really too good. On the occasion of Tolkien 111th birthday!
Silmarillion - Rated: K - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,743 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 5 - Published: 1/3/2003
The Official Fanfiction University of Middleearth by misscam reviews
The fic that spawned miniBalrogs, Elrond's Naturally Nine, the MorgothSauron feud, Urple, the WitchWall and finally, Gimli got the girl.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 64 - Words: 66,366 - Reviews: 3184 - Favs: 2,011 - Follows: 228 - Updated: 7/12/2002 - Published: 3/8/2002 - Complete
The Tale of a King by Arwen Imladviel reviews
This is actually a Silmarillion story, a King we all know reminiscing a loss of his. Quite funny.
Silmarillion - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 926 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/25/2002
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Loneliness of the Fishermouse reviews
In 2509, Celebrían wife of Elrond was journeying to Lórien... the rest, everyone knows. But this isn't about her. Not really. What remains for the bereaved but need and anger?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 5 - Words: 20,515 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 5/6/2012 - Published: 4/9/2012 - Erestor, Glorfindel - Complete
Down the Withywindle reviews
Tom Bombadil goes a-courting... unsuccessfully. Ficlets and drabbles from the Old Forest written for LOTR Community on LJ. MEFA 2011 Third Place in Fixed-Length Ficlets: Immortals and a Smaug's Treasure for the first ficlet of the set.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 857 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 1/17/2012 - Published: 7/19/2010 - Complete
Warping Arda reviews
A collection of drabbles, mostly written for the LJ community Tolkien Weekly. 10. Good as New. Glorfindel's father, his son and a piece of the past. One drabble.
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 10 - Words: 6,068 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 1/8/2012 - Published: 1/1/2010
Beneath the Sickle's Swing reviews
A collection of drabbles found in the ruins of Utumno during the years of Melkor's captivity. MEFA 2011 Third Place in Drabble Series: General and a Smaug's Treasure. 6. After the Manner: Orcs, one drabble.
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Horror - Chapters: 6 - Words: 1,544 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 6/26/2011 - Published: 2/10/2011 - Thuringwethil
A Beleriand Treasury of Childish Tales reviews
A collection of frivolous snippets. Number eight: domestic discontent in Lothlórien. MEFA 2010 Honourable Mention in Genres: Drama: Incomplete for ch.s 1-8.
Silmarillion - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 8 - Words: 16,809 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 2/10/2010 - Published: 3/21/2009
The Journal of Alatáriel, Missionary reviews
Being a fantastical account of the Lady Galadriel's journey to Middle-earth by an unknown author; edited and with critical comments by Erestor and Melinna of Ered Luin; preface by the Lord Celeborn of Lórinand &c. MEFA 2010 Third Place.
Silmarillion - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 11,388 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 2/10/2010 - Published: 1/17/2010 - Galadriel, Celeborn - Complete
Blood and Fire reviews
Fragments of falling Doriath, centred on Oropher. Dior will not give up the jewel... MEFA 2010 First Place in Races: Elves: General.
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 10 - Words: 15,869 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 9/18/2009 - Published: 7/17/2009 - Dior, Celeborn - Complete
Nightingales and Starlight reviews
For many years, Thingol's minstrel Daeron made lament for Lúthien Tinúviel beside dark waters... but not forever. A look at love, loss and the Lay of Leithian. MEFA 2009 First Place in Genres: Character Study: The Silmarillion.
Silmarillion - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 10,195 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/3/2009 - Daeron, Lúthien T. - Complete
Goldilocks and the Three Balrogs reviews
Ca. 1000 TA, Glorfindel finds himself unexpectedly alive and on a ship to Middle-earth in the company of five not-quite-Men. Where next? Imladris, of course... MEFA 2010 Second Place in Genres: Character Study: Silmarillion.
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 4 - Words: 25,647 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 1/17/2009 - Published: 1/4/2009 - Glorfindel - Complete
Wanderlust reviews
A brief history for Erestor, stretching from the ages of the stars to the foundation of Imladris. MEFA 2009 Third Place in Times: First Age and Prior: General.
Silmarillion - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,744 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 4 - Published: 10/31/2008 - Complete
Erestor (49)
Gogol (21)
Nili (8)