Funnybusinesspersonhide bio
 Author has written 6 stories for Maximum Ride, and Book X-overs. If I offended you, feel free to SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS. I confess to you, humble passer-byer, that I have fallen from fanfiction grace. As I continue into my second year of high school, I've had to give up several of my loves, such as diving and fanfiction. HOWEVER! Some of my original writing is available at my DeviantArt: http:/// Peace & Love |
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My Waking Nightmare by God-of-goats-loves-books reviews
Set after MR3, Max accidentally causes Fang to leave the flock one night but after 4 years they find each other again. How will the flock react? How will Max and Fang deal? FAX
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 70 - Words: 134,286 - Reviews: 1177 - Favs: 249 - Follows: 214 - Updated: 7/5/2013 - Published: 7/5/2007 - Max, Fang
We Go Anywhere But To The Ground by wincasters reviews
John's face crumples in on itself and the hurt that's been rattling around between his bones suddenly erupts into a painful bloom, and he falls. Sherlock Holmes, even in death, remains the only man capable of bringing John Watson to his knees.
Sherlock - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 25,571 - Reviews: 412 - Favs: 1,961 - Follows: 237 - Published: 2/1/2012 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
Could I Lie Next To You? by Givin' Em Hell x reviews
MCR Frerard. After the Revenge tour, the guys head to Hawaii for vacation, where Frank and Gerard must face their feelings offstage. But the real world-and their relationship-doesn't take it as well as a crowd of excited fans. Rated for sex and violence
Marching Band - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 34 - Words: 66,490 - Reviews: 162 - Favs: 201 - Follows: 62 - Updated: 8/11/2011 - Published: 6/7/2007 - Complete
The Seduction of Haruhi Fujioka by Names Are Hard reviews
Tamaki has a plan that involves Haruhi in a most mature way. She is the unsuspecting prey of our lucid Tamaki. Watch the progression of their hearts, careers, and friendships, as Tamaki pulls Haruhi to him in an interestingly well made web. Tamaki/Haruhi
Ouran High School Host Club - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 18 - Words: 27,625 - Reviews: 190 - Favs: 172 - Follows: 197 - Updated: 6/15/2010 - Published: 7/30/2008 - Tamaki S., Haruhi F.
A Twisted Fate by EverlyYours reviews
The untouchable concept of love is the restraint, the chains that hold them back. When thrown into the darkest of nightmares, when will salvation pull through? But the question that burns within them is: where is love, in a world filled with chaos? Host.
Host - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 18 - Words: 42,677 - Reviews: 275 - Favs: 78 - Follows: 83 - Updated: 8/31/2009 - Published: 8/10/2008
Vampire Bites by iluvzuzu reviews
Takes place in City of Ashes. Alec goes for a walk and runs into someone he may have neglected to phone... What on earth could possibly happen? Alec/Magnus. Oneshot.
Mortal Instruments - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,925 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 173 - Follows: 26 - Published: 6/13/2009 - Alec L., Magnus B. - Complete
10 Things: Twilight Style by a little erratic reviews
Lists of 10 things such as: 10 Things the Volturi Frequently do, 10 Things Edward Does while Bella Sleeps, and 10 Cullen Nicknames! Which Twilight character bought a Snuggie? Find out in Ch. 7! Companion to 10 Things: Harry Potter Style. More to come!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 7 - Words: 6,076 - Reviews: 404 - Favs: 219 - Follows: 145 - Updated: 1/31/2009 - Published: 2/18/2008 - Aro, Bella
Spoils of War by hyperoo reviews
Katara is kidnapped by the Fire Nation and used as a pawn in Azula plans. Zutara and Taang. Disclaimer: Don't Avatar: the Last Airbender, it is property of Viacom. I make no money off of this nor tangible profit. Only ego boosts.
Avatar: Last Airbender - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 18,709 - Reviews: 84 - Favs: 122 - Follows: 109 - Updated: 10/5/2008 - Published: 6/10/2007 - Zuko, Katara
Stained Glass Windows by BlueBlood359 reviews
A sequal to The Seduction of Edward..... When Edward finally gives in will Bella finally get what she wants or will the road she's taken lead only to heart ache?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 23 - Words: 53,597 - Reviews: 2193 - Favs: 1,073 - Follows: 678 - Updated: 9/22/2008 - Published: 7/19/2007 - Complete
The Seduction of Edward by BlueBlood359 reviews
Alice gets a vision about Bella that leaves Edward stunned. Will he get what he has secretly wanted. Or will he be too stubborn to do something for himself for once. But when Alice tells Bella of her vision, Bella becomes determined to make it happen.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 13 - Words: 27,903 - Reviews: 916 - Favs: 1,305 - Follows: 498 - Updated: 9/22/2008 - Published: 3/30/2007 - Complete
Fire & Crystals by ghostlygreeneyedgirl reviews
Sarah's limbs flared to life as Jareth's lips caressed her own, "Mine" he breathed. She awoke with a start-body taunt, her heart racing. & To stay with Toby, Sarah accepts Jareth's offer, but do either know the full terms? And why are the walls whispering
Labyrinth - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 21 - Words: 31,121 - Reviews: 182 - Favs: 241 - Follows: 110 - Updated: 9/12/2008 - Published: 5/27/2008 - Complete
First by somakeitcount reviews
Jacob and Renesmee finally get to go on a date on their own. What will their time together lead up to? As told by Jacob Black. One-shot.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,593 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 8 - Published: 8/27/2008 - Jacob, Renesmee C./Nessie - Complete
A Valium Incident, A Valium Plan by rom.gurl.anna reviews
A silly story about what Angel does when she finds out about the Valium incident in MR3. FAX. Slight Niggy if you use a microscope. POVs from all Flock members, none of whom I own, and maybe even Total, I don't own him either, Read and Review.
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 15,939 - Reviews: 183 - Favs: 84 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 8/24/2008 - Published: 8/17/2007 - Max, Fang - Complete
Tanked by hideunspoken reviews
From Stephenie Meyer's The Host. Ian wakes up and finds Wanda has probably gone to Doc until Wanda wakes up in the hospital in Pet’s body. In other words, the time while Wanda was in the cryotank. Chapters switch from Ian and Melanie’s points of view.
Host - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 10,829 - Reviews: 130 - Favs: 91 - Follows: 80 - Updated: 8/22/2008 - Published: 5/24/2008 - Complete
Washing Up by Madeline693 reviews
Wanda hears an intruder again while taking a bath. Wanda/Ian fluff so far. Rated T just for safety.
Host - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,955 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 76 - Updated: 8/1/2008 - Published: 7/26/2008 - Wanderer/Wanda, Ian O.
Touched by jaded image reviews
One-shot. Ian's thoughts on touching Wanda. Nothing dirty, minds out of the gutter, please.
Host - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,276 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 123 - Follows: 24 - Published: 7/28/2008 - Ian O., Wanderer/Wanda - Complete
Condoms by jaded image reviews
Wanda can get anything they need during raids. Well...Mel needs some condoms. WandIan, implied MelJared.
Host - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,389 - Reviews: 109 - Favs: 215 - Follows: 44 - Published: 7/7/2008 - Complete
Acceptance: A Fanfiction For The Host by three.hills reviews
Ian and Wanderer spend some quality time together. Set after The Host ends. Quality time. Lemons...Graphic. Reviews are always great, I respond to every one of them.
Host - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,012 - Reviews: 164 - Favs: 363 - Follows: 68 - Published: 6/23/2008 - Ian O., Wanderer/Wanda - Complete
Reactions by efficacious humorosity reviews
The Host" by Stephenie Meyer. Wanderer misses Ian while he's gone on a raid. When he returns, she welcomes him warmly and he revels in his new ability to make her react to him physically. Fluff. One-shot.
Host - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,741 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 105 - Follows: 29 - Published: 6/13/2008 - Complete
Blush by jaded image reviews
The Host fic. Ian loves to see Wanda blush. Just a one-shot, full of much needed fluff for all WandIan lovers! Beware of sugar overload.
Host - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,186 - Reviews: 156 - Favs: 281 - Follows: 46 - Published: 6/8/2008 - Complete
Welded by hideunspoken reviews
Ian's point of view in chapter 56 of Stephenie Meyer's The Host.
Host - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,079 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 11 - Published: 5/22/2008 - Complete
Fifteen Years Gone by tanyart reviews
Saving the world is more of an obligation than a passion. Duty; not pleasure. Destiny; not choice. Maximum Ride unexpectedly finds herself fifteen years into the future during her Antarctica escapade. She has doubts. The future never included her.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 16,155 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 4/6/2008 - Published: 1/25/2008
An Unexpected Life by tekhne reviews
Jacob stopped Bella from jumping. Edward eventually returns, but has some trouble finding Bella. AU, BxJ
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 45 - Words: 49,252 - Reviews: 1604 - Favs: 1,036 - Follows: 919 - Updated: 4/5/2008 - Published: 5/9/2007
The Playlist by piperchick reviews
Max discovers a secret of Fang's on his computer. FAX changed TWO SHOT
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,365 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 92 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 4/1/2008 - Published: 10/21/2007
Simple Math Is Not So Simple by Nightwingstar reviews
How exactly does one plus one in the end equal zero? Fang POV Fax WARNING! Set after MR4! Click if you dare!
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,764 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/20/2008 - Complete
50 Ways for Emmett to Annoy His Family by Melody Cullen reviews
Here is a list of 50 things Emmett a.k.a. The Master of Annoyance has done to annoy his family! Not good at summaries! Please R&R!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,508 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 3/10/2008 - Published: 3/5/2008 - Complete
In Sickness or in Health by turquoise.seas reviews
FAX... Fang has a fever, what does Max do? Oneshot.. cutesyness.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,559 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 125 - Follows: 23 - Published: 1/15/2008 - Complete
Bio Class by C Nelson reviews
Fang, Max and the rest of their Bio class gets locked out of the classroom. So what is there do do, play would you rather. FAXNESS!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 830 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 7 - Published: 1/3/2008 - Complete
10 Ways To Annoy Edward and Others by harryedwardgirl93 reviews
I first started with 10 Ways to Annoy Edward but I got a lot of people who liked that list so I have now decided to do ones for other characters too! There is currently a Edward, Jacob, and a NEW Bella list!
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 751 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 12/28/2007 - Published: 12/21/2007 - Complete
Come Back to Me Bella by CGEclipsed16 reviews
Jacob sees Bella and Edward from afar. Author's Note Explains it all.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 450 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/26/2007
Toward the Moon by 3Es Queen reviews
When Bella's relationship with Edward ends, she finds herself returning to the last place that felt like home. There, she finds that not all relationships end just because someone changes. BELLA x JACOB. Enjoy and review please.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 34 - Words: 73,668 - Reviews: 1060 - Favs: 762 - Follows: 249 - Updated: 12/6/2007 - Published: 8/22/2007 - Bella, Jacob - Complete
Eight, Left Bracket is a Sad Emote by tanyart reviews
Fed up with reading bad summaries, the flock tries to save the MR fandom by teaching a lesson on writing teasers. Yet, things start to look grim when they are bombarded with horrific displays of bad grammar, lack of punctuation, and fourth wall narrative.
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 556 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 6 - Published: 10/9/2007
40 Harsh Things Max Could Say to a Naked Fang by EdwardAddict reviews
Just a little list of things Max might say to Fang if he didn't measure up. HumorParody Oneshot Faxy
Maximum Ride - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 398 - Reviews: 125 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 16 - Published: 9/23/2007 - Max, Fang - Complete
Wolf's Sigh by HentaiHanyou reviews
My own version of what should happened at the end of Eclipse. BellaJacob. Mature rating for love scene. Don't be a hater, it's really quite good. Reviews equals love!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,949 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 12 - Published: 9/21/2007
Loyalist by party.every.day reviews
JacobXBella:Then his mouth fell on the sensitive skin just below my jaw. I could feel the steady deep ‘thump’ of his heart speed up as the air around us suddenly got thirty degrees hotter.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,954 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 19 - Published: 9/6/2007 - Bella, Jacob - Complete
Heightened Awareness by Maesdream reviews
Why exactly were the other club members late getting to the clubroom? Was it all part of her master plan? Haruhi x Kyon oneshot. Warning for Lemon and adult content.
Haruhi Suzumiya series - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,534 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 310 - Follows: 72 - Published: 9/4/2007 - Haruhi S., Kyon - Complete
Nano Conscience by tanyart reviews
Everyone knows you can’t spell slaughter without laughter. Omega only gets half of the joke. [drabble]
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 485 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/30/2007 - Complete
It's 34B by tanyart reviews
[oneshot] Max walks in on Fang while he’s secretly doing the laundry. He screws up and now he’s thinking about more than just a pile of dirty clothes. [fax!fluff]
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,100 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 12 - Published: 8/26/2007 - Complete
Triangles With Linear Qualities by rcaqua reviews
Jacob doesn't even like geometry.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,234 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 95 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/17/2007 - Complete
ways to torture jacob by twilightlovr reviews
Spoilers for eclipse, i really dislike jacob so i decided to make a list on all the things that i hate about him. i am sorry if i offended people in this, so read ch.7, it is a apologize ch. to all of the people i have offended.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 4,019 - Reviews: 273 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 8/14/2007 - Published: 8/9/2007 - Complete
Minimum Walk: The Failed Parody by tanyart reviews
Max meets her counterpart, a flamingoavian hybrid named Mini. Jeb is livid, the Flock is baffled, unicorns don't exist... and quite predictably, things go horribly wrong. So what else is new?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 21,513 - Reviews: 101 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 8/5/2007 - Published: 4/1/2007
As Our Lips Touched by Mari's 6636 reviews
What would have happened if, on page 376, instead of freezing at Edward’s voice in her mind, telling her to be happy, instead, Bella DID turn her head to touch her lips to Jacob’s shoulder…?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 3 - Words: 930 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 7/2/2007 - Published: 6/29/2007 - Complete
A Nudge in the Right Direction by Anglerfish reviews
While Max was on her date with Sam, Nudge was having a little talk with Fang. Threeshot, Fax fluff.
Maximum Ride - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,444 - Reviews: 92 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 6/6/2007 - Published: 5/30/2007 - Fang, Max - Complete
Loving by Tomo Potter reviews
What would have happened if Fang and Max had been alone on the beach when they kissed? Graphic Fax... I really prefer MANG. Full version complete with sex posted on my LJ. Fanfic100: The Flock. Prompt 23. Lovers
Maximum Ride - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,029 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 20 - Published: 5/29/2007 - Complete
Mon Ami by AndCaesarFalls reviews
In a dark abandoned hallway Haruhi becomes stubborn, and Tamaki learns that sometimes you must get physical in order to prove a point.
Ouran High School Host Club - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,263 - Reviews: 97 - Favs: 187 - Follows: 99 - Published: 4/22/2007 - Tamaki S., Haruhi F.
In All Your Fantasies by Supergirrl reviews
Max, like all teenagers, has interesting dreams.Fax
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 718 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 12 - Published: 1/6/2007 - Max, Fang - Complete
When Fan Girls Attack! by Ashley-Lampost reviews
When stopping for the night, Max and the gang run into rabid fangirls! Oneshot. ParodyHumor
Maximum Ride - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 831 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 5 - Published: 12/29/2006 - Complete
Blind Lover by Supergirrl reviews
There were many advantages to having a blind lover. Max knew this well.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,377 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 8 - Published: 11/28/2006 - Iggy, Max - Complete
Says You by killertrees reviews
A Zutara sillyfic. Answer to a challenge. Each part of the story is inspired by a random quote, each part leading closer and closer to Zuko getting laid. Teehee.
Avatar: Last Airbender - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,829 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 144 - Follows: 16 - Published: 10/20/2006 - Katara, Zuko - Complete
She's Human, Too by Pyronic reviews
Set during Max’s breakdown scene in chapters 101103. Fang’s protective, and slightly loving, thoughts on the whole ordeal.
Maximum Ride - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,587 - Reviews: 79 - Favs: 90 - Follows: 21 - Published: 5/30/2006 - Complete
Hide in the Dark by maliciousqueen reviews
OneShot. Zutara. Katara gets kidnapped by a mysterious stranger and held hostage in a cave... rated R for you know what...
Avatar: Last Airbender - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,337 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 173 - Follows: 28 - Published: 4/30/2006 - Katara, Zuko - Complete
Oasis by Vicki So reviews
Katara's learned more than just a few new tricks, and Zuko's loving it! What really happened to the two benders during their duel at the Northern Water Tribe? A Zutara oneshot, PG version.
Avatar: Last Airbender - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,263 - Reviews: 85 - Favs: 340 - Follows: 58 - Published: 2/4/2006 - Katara, Zuko - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .
Leeches, Birds, and Wolves reviews
Renesmee is going to high school. Oh joy! INSERT HEAVY SARCASM HERE And lucky her, the half-vampire had to get stuck with a REAL werewolf and a bid-kid! Twilight/MaximumRide crossover Set after BD and FW
Book X-overs - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,373 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 15 - Published: 8/13/2008
The Problem With Omega reviews
Fang left the flock two years back. What happens when an old enemy shows up and takes Max back to Itex? Some adult themes... OmegaxMax Fax
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 3,193 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 3/22/2008 - Published: 8/19/2007
Operation: Vacation reviews
Jeb takes the flock, plus Ella and Dr. M, to Disney World for a welldeserved vacation. But what's this? Fang likes some girl? Who is it! FAX
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 6,147 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 8/18/2007 - Published: 8/13/2007 - Complete
The UMRFGPA reviews
The United Maximum Ride Fan Girl Pairing Association. The flock meets some arguing fangirls! FAX VS MARI! Add a dash of Fax in there. Chapter 2 is up!
Maximum Ride - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,365 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 8/11/2007 - Published: 8/10/2007 - Complete
A Fangirl Fantasy reviews
Five fangirls meet the flock. What's their deal? And god how did they turn out to be so OBSESSIVE? Fax
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,097 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/9/2007 - Complete
Ten Years reviews
Ten Years after Itex fell. The Flock's seperated. Then Max gets kidnapped! Where's Fang? And what the hell is wrong with Sam and Lissa? SAX FASSA GADGE FAX I suck at writing summaries
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,611 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 5 - Published: 8/9/2007 - Complete
