AN - wow. was completely not expecting to upload this, just stumbled across it, and thought hey, why not?! so now I am! :D yay!

this isn't related to any of my other fics (although they're good too, you should go and check them out! ;D)

ahem, apologies for the shameless self advertising (not)

anyway, hope you enjoy this!

Disclaimer - *looks on desk. looks under bed. looks on shelf. rigorously searches whole house* damn. I can't find that piece of paper saying that i own Harry Potter anywhere. must have lost it. oh well, then for now, since I have no proof, I'll just have to say that I don't own it *pouts*


A Way To Relieve The Tension

Harry Potter was currently sat, at Hogwarts, in the office of the greatest headmaster that the school had ever had, Albus Dumbledore. After telling Harry that there would be no more meetings for a while, the headmaster had suddenly come across another memory that he believed he had lost many years ago. At the current moment in time, they had just finished viewing that memory.

"So" said Professor Dumbledore "There is another clue to the solving of the mystery that is Tom Riddle, or as he is better known now, Lord Voldemort. I hope you understand what you have just seen, Harry, and know the importance of it."

"Sort of" said Harry. Then he decided to bring up something that had been troubling him for a while.

"Sir" he began "We need to do something. The whole school is on edge, all of the time! It's driving everyone mad!" he paused, and then added "Especially now that Quidditch has finished for the year."

"I had noticed as well" Dumbledore admitted "But a bit of fear in these times is good, don't you agree?"

"Well, yes." Harry agreed "But this is all of the time! Something has to be done."

"Very well." the Professor agreed "I take it you have an idea?"

Harry leaned forward conspiringly. "Here's what I think we should do…"

That night, after everyone was asleep, and carrying a special pass from Dumbledore, in case he ran into anyone (even though he had the Cloak and the Map), Harry made a trip to the kitchens. When he got to the portrait of the bowl of fruit, he removed the Cloak, and tickled the pear until it turned into a door handle.

With a quick glance in either direction, he opened it and stepped inside. He was greeted in the usual way - by Dobby. He quickly explained what it was that he wanted the elves to do, and they were more than happy to help him with his plan.

When he left, half an hour later, and weighed down with the food he had been unable to refuse, he grinned to himself in anticipation of the next day. This was gonna be good.

Harry arrived at lunch the next day hand in hand with Ginny. The last few weeks with her had been amazing, almost as if they were part of someone else's life.

As they took their seats at the Gryffindor table, next to Ron and Hermione, who were having an argument, as usual, Harry made sure that he had a good view of the headmaster. When Harry saw him looking, he nodded that everything had gone to plan last night, and that he was going to start in a few minutes.

As Dumbledore looked around the room, he realised that Harry was right about the tension - it was so thick in the hall it could almost be cut with a knife. When the food arrived, people looked a little confused at the amount of soups, jellies, pies and soft, squishy foods that there were, but accepted it and began eating. After a few minutes, Harry stood up. Ginny looked at him in confusion. He gestured to her that he was alright, then pointed his wand at his throat and intoned loudly "Sonorous."

Everyone stopped to look at Harry. He glanced around, and picked up a cherry pie, and began slowly walking up towards the head table, carrying the pie. He spoke as he walked. "Around the school recently" he began "I have been noticing the extraordinary amount of tension that seems to be in the air." He was still steadily walking along the room, carrying the pie. He continued "I have decided that something needs to be done about this. Yes, war is tense, but this is getting almost to much." He glanced around the room "For all of us." He reached the steps up to the head table and climbed them carefully, still carrying the pie. " I decided, as I said, with the permission of the Headmaster, that something needs to be done about this."

He stopped in front of the Headmaster and faced the hall. "May I stress again" he said "That I have the full permission of the Headmaster to do this, and that I would not do so otherwise." He walked over and stood in front of Professor McGonnagle, the pie steady in his hands. "His only stipulation was that the first move was this, and that I do it as he couldn't."

He glances at the Headmaster to check that this was still what he wanted, and upon receiving his affirmative nod, calmly leant over and squashed the cherry pie he was holding right into professor McGonnagle's face. "From the headmaster." he said sweetly.

There was a stunned silence in the hall. No-one could believe that Harry had just done that. Then very calmly, Professor McGonnagle picked up a jelly in each hand, and pushed one into Harry's face, the other into Dumbledore's.

"There" she said "a return gift." Suddenly Harry was hit in the back of the head by another pie, chicken this time. He looked round to see Ginny standing there, a grin on her face. "I take it this means a food fight then? That was your plan?"

"Problem with that?" he asked her.

"Not at all" she replied, and smoothly scooped up a cheesecake and flung it across the hall into the surprised face of Malfoy. The look on his face made Harry burst out laughing.

"Miss Weasley" came Snape's smooth voice across the hall "50 points from Gryffindor for throwing fo-."

"50 points to Gryffindor" cut in professor McGonnagle "for an excellent shot. Oh, and a further 20 for hitting Mr. Potter."

"Headmaster" began Snape "you cannot let her do that. She is blatantly undermining me, not to mention the favouritism she is showing-"

"Oh, be quiet" she snapped at him "and have some pie." She picked one up and threw it around the headmaster, hitting professor Snape square in the face, leaving him looking as equally gob smacked as Malfoy. This just made Harry laugh harder.

Meanwhile, a war of sorts had broken out between the Gryffindor and Slytherin tables. There appeared to be a sort of free-for-all, with a few Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws joining in as well, most of who were previous members of the DA. Then Professors Sprout and Flitwick, who had clearly been planning among themselves, started throwing food at the students of the other's house. Very quickly everyone was throwing food at everyone else.

As Harry watched this, he smiled at a job well done. He had gotten them to relax a bit, and have some fun. Even the usually shy and timid Hufflepuffs had joined in. it had been a great success. All of a sudden, he saw a cake flying his way. He quickly ducked and went to join in the fun.

Half an hour later, and it was all over. The great hall was a mess. There was food all over the walls and floor, and the occupants of the paintings weren't too happy. The enchanted ceiling didn't look so enchanted any more, as you could clearly tell it was just a ceiling from the amount of food stuck on it. The hall's occupants weren't much better. You could hardly tell who some people were, let alone what house they were in, from the amount of flour, eggs, cake, and jelly all over them.

Everyone, however, was smiling gleefully, having just had had more fun in that half an hour than they had had in a long time. At some point, one of the tables had been turned on it's side and used as a shield to block incoming food, and students were flopped all around it. After a few minutes of watching this, Harry called "Dobby!" Dobby popped in beside him, glanced at the mess, and said "Did it work, Harry Potter sir? Did yous all have fun?" Harry smiled at the over exuberant house elf.

"Yes Dobby, it did work. Thank you for all of your help making the food." Dobby beamed at him in reply. Hermione, however, had overheard his conversation. "You mean to tell me" she began "That you had the house elves make extra food - just for this!" she was crackling with fury.

"Yes, Hermione" said Harry calmly "I did. And they enjoyed doing it. In fact, they were ecstatic that I asked! They wanted to do the extra work, Hermione! When will you open your eyes and see that they enjoy the work that they do? That they don't want to be free? And, in fact, they see being freed the same way we would see being disowned from our family! Shameful and dishonouring!"

Students who had been watching this heated exchange between the Boy Who Lived and the bossy know-it-all Gryffindor gasped as each and every house elf employed at Hogwarts popped into the Great Hall and started applauding Harry's words. Hermione stared at them as they clapped, and, after a few minutes, turned to leave with tears in her eyes, furious at Harry. Ron, however, caught her arm.

"Hermione," he began "Harry doesn't mean anything by that, and you know it. But truthfully, Hermione, you know what he said was right, deep down, don't you?"

Hermione looked down shamefully, before looking up again, tears pooling slightly in her eyes. "I'm sorry." She said, talking to both the house-elves and Harry now. "I'm sorry for how I've treated you. I'm sorry I didn't listen to you when you tried to tell me, and I'm sorry that what I did was disgraceful to you. I'm sorry."

Dobby quickly ran over to her. "Don't be sorry, Harry Potters Grangy!" he told her happily. "Yous was only doing what yous thought was right."

Suddenly, all of the house-elves were gone, and Hogwarts was left slightly stunned at the whole exchange that had just happened. Finally, Harry spoke up, dispelling the moment.

"Right, now that's all over, we all need to get cleaning." he announced to everyone. "We've got a lot of work to do if we want to get this clean by dinner time."


AN - Tada! what did you think? please review and let me know! :D