By The Fetus of Death

AN: Ed's not exactly OOC in this, he's more, well, OOC'd by someone else. Being a fan of Nullmetal Alchemist (ie. FMA the Abridged Series), I wrote a fic about what happened when Ed became a cannibal.

"Mum, you're... You're beautiful!" Ed breathed. The gruesome, decayed-looking body of the failed human transmutation stared at him. Its eyes were inhumanely wide, with no pupils or whites. Just a bright, terrifying hue of purple.

Ed stared right back, shivering. But then he remembered. Al. He'd been taken away. By what, exactly, Ed had no idea. He'd watched his body disintegrate, and-
The pain suddenly hit him. Ed screamed, involuntarily letting tears run down his face. Not only had Al been taken from him, but so had his left leg. All that was left of it was a bleeding stump.

Ed would never be the same. All he knew was the pain; the pain of losing his mother, of losing Al, of losing his leg, of his father leaving them all to fend for themselves.

Ed needed Al. If he couldn't have his parents, he at least needed the last member of his family. He had no one else to live for.

Still crying, Ed turned to look for something, anything he could save his brother's soul with. Through his blurry vision, he saw it. A suit of armour. Trying not to scream, trying not to collapse, he made the agonising crawl over to it. And with his own blood, drew the symbol he needed to get Al back, sacrificing his right arm for Al's soul. Equivalent exchange, huh...?

When Ed woke up, he was hungry. He was hungry for something he had never been hungry for before. Something... Raw. But what?

Ed tried to sit up, but gave up when his missing arm and leg made him unstable and he nearly fell out of the bed. He looked around, taking in his surroundings. Granny Pinako's infirmary...?

That was when he noticed Pinako sitting on a chair in the corner of the room, face grave. That was when he figured out what his hunger was for. Flesh. Human flesh.

"I'm hungry," Ed said. Pinako looked at him. "You're finally awake, pipsqueak. I suppose I'll go get something for you to eat."

"No, don't," Ed said quickly. "Could you come over here?"

Pinako, somewhat warily, got up and stood next to Ed.

A moment later, Pinako was being gored alive. Ed ripped and teared at her flesh with his teeth, only pausing to swallow the raw meat and blood. Soon she was just a pile of bones and, well, hair. Ed wasn't screwed up enough to want to eat that stuff.

Feeling satisfied, Ed relaxed and closed his eyes. Then he realised that Pinako's bones were all over the floor and someone could walk in at any given moment. Ed started, and with much difficulty got out of the bed and threw the evidence quite literally out of the window.

A moment after Ed had struggled into the bed, Al entered the room. "Brother!" he called happily. "You're awake!"

Ed stared at him. A walking, talking, empty suit of armour was really quite a sight. Especially if it's your brother.

"I thought Granny Pinako was in here," Al said, breaking Ed out of his thoughts.

"I- I haven't seen her," Ed lied.

"Hmmm... Maybe she went out for a while. Anyway, how are you feeling, brother?"

"Great, actually, for having lost an arm and a leg and having been horribly traumatised," Ed replied, in a tone that suggested the whole thing had been no big deal. He laughed lightheartedly, grinning at Al. "I guess human flesh is pretty good for humans, huh? We were probably made to eat each other. You know, free for all, fatties die first. Absolutely filled with protein. Huh, maybe I should've gone for Winry instead, in that case."

"Brother, that's not very funny!"

"Oh, sure it is! Come on, it's not like you have to worry about it, with that metal body of yours and all. I don't think that'd be all that good for me."

Al sighed. "Well, I suppose it's good you're okay, brother." With that, he walked out, and could be heard a moment later calling, "Winry, Ed's been acting weird! He's talking about cannibalism!"

"Oh, that's perfectly normal for someone who just got mind-effed by that sort of thing," Winry yelled back. "He should be back to normal in a few days!"

However, Ed was only 11, and his young mind was flexible to learning new things. If he was ever to cease being a cannibal, it would be a dark and difficult path there.

Oh-ho-ho, Winry's totally next! Ed thought, smiling brightly to himself. But then the smile faded. Actually, I think I'll just transmute her into something that's actually useful and less annoying. I don't want to go around ruining my body eating dirty whores! Who knows where that thing's been!

Ed had seen the light. And so, he'd been converted. Permanently. Ed would continue to eat raw human meat for the rest of his life - and enjoy it.