Author's Notes: This little chapter was kind of an afterthought, which is why it's so short and separated from the main bulk that was chapter two. I guess since chapter one was really a teaser, you could call this the other half of the bookend. As for content, I really don't feel like this is a crossover. Though one NCIS character gets a mention here as a direct result of involvement in Rule 52, it's not really significant, so I'm going to call it cop!verse only. However, there is a distinct possibility that there will be a companion NCIS-only story if my muses let me get to it. (But, with the way my muses are, that's a really big 'if'.) Anyway, enjoy the ending of this one! As always, thank you for reading, for the comments, and I hope you've enjoyed it.

Disclaimer: Not mine, sadly. Please don't sue! I do this for fun and I make no money from my writing.

Chapter 3

Jim was not familiar with the term, "Curiosity killed the cat."

Because curiosity never killed him.

Well, at least not yet.

Kirk did acknowledge the small chance that, if caught, he would be murdered, probably in a horrific and public way that would garner approval from half the police department and good chunk of the criminal element. But still, there were just some things that were worth it. He weighed the risk against the reward, factored in his probability of being netted red-handed and decided to go for it. His opposition had neither the awareness nor the skill set necessary to trap him. And besides, when had he been the type to do anything that was safe? Yeah, never. Easy answer.

Operation: Hack McCoy's Email was about to commence.

Ever since Jim was all but booted out the door of his partner's apartment, he wondered why McCoy would willingly confess to reading cheesy romance novels in favor of protecting whatever was on his phone. Kirk understood that being sick did strange things to normally sane people (not that his partner was all there to begin with, but hey, he was trying to give the man the benefit of the doubt), but that kind of action was approaching a new level of ludicrous.

Kirk snagged his laptop off the kitchen table, gently pulling the power cord from the adapter in the computer. He wandered barefoot into the kitchen and grabbed a beer from the fridge before he parked himself on the couch in his living room. Firing up the piece of technology, Kirk entered his password and waited for his system to boot up.

Bringing up the Google Mail homepage, he clicked on the 'username' field and stopped. Tapping his fingers against his face, Jim took a sip of his beer and pondered his options. He could do this one of two ways: play the guessing game on McCoy's password, or he could attempt to hack Google's server. A loud yawn that seemed to come from left field gave him sudden answer. Kirk popped in the McCoy's user ID, and with a silent prayer heavenward for both his luck and his safety, entered the password he knew Bones used for just about everything. After a second of processing time, Jim was pleasantly surprised when the system logged him right on.

Making a mental note to talk to McCoy when he was Ebola-free about predicable passwords, Jim licked his lips and began snooping. Part of him felt dirty and guilty about nosing through his partner's personal emails, but the other curious part really didn't give a shit. He scrolled down about half a page until he hit paydirt. When he saw one name in particular, Kirk rubbed his hands together in anticipation, his suspicions confirmed. Clicking on the email, Jim took a swig of his beer and sat back in his chair.

To: bonesmccoy
From: mossadninja
Subject: BRAAIINNSSS!

Len,

Have you murdered Jim yet? If you feel you are nearing that point, please call me. I can be of assistance in order to keep you from getting caught. I have…experience. :)

Though you've had the pleasure of meeting a handful of my coworkers, there are several people in this agency whom you have not made acquaintance. Among them is Special Agent Timothy McGee. He is our computer expert extraordinaire, all around smart guy, and absolutely the reason I have not yet injured Tony. I do not wish to set a poor example for our Probie. But that, however, is beside the point.

While we are very proud of Tim and all he has accomplished at NCIS, what is not advertised is that McGee has gained fame as author Thom E. Gemcity. I do believe you are familiar with Gemcity's work, and it is for that reason I come to you now.

I found the attachment rather entertaining and I thought you would, too. I am sending it to you with Tim's blessing in hopes he can secure your help. He is looking for another set of critical eyes, and we thought you would, what is the saying, 'Fit that mold,' yes? Thom Gemcity is branching out from police procedural novels to the ever-popular zombie genre, and McGee would like to borrow your brutal honesty.

(Incidentally, I might have also told him that you're a fan of books with gore and brains, so apologies if that was not something you wished to be common knowledge. McGee has sworn an oath of secrecy, however, so that little tidbit is in good hands.)

Tim sends his thanks in advance, along with a request that he be allowed to meet you the next time you come to Washington. You have earned his instant adoration, with your ability to ignore Tony and not fear Gibbs. It's almost…cute. But don't tell him I said that. He should fear us. It's only proper. ;)

Hope all is well in Iowa City. We need to have lunch again sometime – I have recently discovered some new techniques that could be beneficial to you in order to gain compliance while on the street, and I would love to show you. Whether that compliance is from the people you arrest or your partner, I will let you decide on the proper application of force.

Always,
Ziva

Jim finished reading the email, and shoulders drooping, fell back against the couch and groaned. He threw one frustrated arm over his face. He wanted to yell out loud, but instead, Kirk settled for a simple agonized groan. "Oh, Bones," he moaned, shaking his head. "We gotta get you laid, buddy."

McCoy, who practically had Ziva David eating from his palm in no time flat upon their initial meeting, was not engaging in a long-distance relationship with the NCIS agent and Mossad assassin. All was not right in the world. Beside the fact that his partner just cost him a C-note, Kirk thought there was something intrinsically wrong with the fact that the two LEOs hadn't hooked up. He thought it was a sure thing after their romantic dinner two at Ribisi's the winter prior, but now he wasn't so sure. Either way, Kirk knew he had to at least attempt to rectify what he saw as a grave injustice.

But, he couldn't do it without help, and Jim knew just the man to call. Resolute, Kirk fished his cell phone from his pocket. He dialed Pike's house, and while he waited for Lynn to find the lieutenant, Jim printed the email and took a couple of screen captures. He closed out of McCoy's email in time for Chris to pick up the phone. "Lieu," he said simply. "Check your email. We have a new mission."

-FIN-