Buffy is owned by Joss Whedon
Puppet Master is owned by Charles Band
6 Puppet Master movies for $6 put this in my head.
Dawn was excited she knew it was Tuesday which meant Willow and Tara were coming to visit today. Xander and Anya visited yesterday which was nice because of well...Xander but bad because of Anya. She waits like a lion on the prowl and hears a knock on the door. She bolts for the door and opens it and instantly clutches the two witches in a bear hug.
Willow just smiled. "O-okay Dawnie we're excited that we're here too."
Dawn just stood back and saw a case in Willow's hand. "What's in the case?"
Willow just held the case out. "Inheritance from a distant uncle they wig me out big time so you'll probably love them."
Dawn wasted no time and laid the crate out before opening it. Dawn looked inside and saw toys. "Dolls I'm 14 guys."
Willow just looks at her. "Not dolls, puppets if you believe my great uncle these guys helped stop Nazi zombies from ever being made."
Dawn just started unloading the puppets one at a time. Up first was a puppet that had a drill bit stuck on his head and was dressed up as a soldier. After him was a big chunky puppet with brown pants a big red shirt human sized hands and a little tiny head. Dawn pulled out another puppet this one was a six armed cowboy. After him came a jester straight down to his little hat. Dawn looks at the last one and smiles at the little black coat with the hook and knife for hands. "Aw it's Spike in a little hat."
The two witches laugh at that and Willow is kicking herself for not seeing that earlier.
Dawn's mood instantly changed she liked these guys they were her kind of puppets. "Can I keep these guys?"
Willow nods. "They're all yours."
The three goofed around watched TV and had a couple of thumb wrestling tournaments. The witches left and Dawn was left alone with Joyce. Dawn went upstairs and looked over her new…objects not toys. She grabs the crate but tips it over and a book falls out of a secret compartment. Willow might have thought they were just toys but she found the mother load. Chemistry notes this is the book of a genius. There's even a way to bring these guys to life. Most of the ingredients are ready and available at the magic shop. Buffy won't let her buy anything but that's what Spike is for. There's only a problem with one ingredient. A drop of blood from two virgins well she's one maybe Spike will have an idea for two. People at school think she's weird enough already.
Spike was sitting there and listening to Dawn's idea. "You really think those little buggers will come to life because I might have some magic beans for you?"
Dawn shrugged. "I'm curious enough to find out for myself but I can't get what I need because Buffy won't let me buy anything at the magic shop."
Spike just pouts. "Bloody priceless Big Bad to courier so what happened with these guys that made them famous."
Dawn just held the big one in red. "If you'd believe it these guys stopped Nazi zombies from showing up in World War 2."
Spike just laughed. "Oh I believe it. When I get back I'll tell ya about me and Poof's yellow submarine ride."
Dawn just stopped him at the door. "Spike the spell needs one more ingredient."
"What's that?" Spike asked.
Dawn blushes a little before she whispered into Spike's ear as his eyes lit up.
"And here I thought the evening would be dull."
Spike was in the magic box and rounded up everything Dawn would need except one. The drop of blood doesn't the Niblet know if he could get virgin blood he'd be feeding right now, damn chip.
Buffy just rolls her eyes. "Spike are you done yet?"
Spike turned to the slayer. "You know I'm a paying customer what happened to me being always right."
Buffy rolled her eyes. "Just get what you need and make sure I don't have to slay you for it."
Spike had everything but the blood. Slayer's blood is no good Poof took care of that. Watcher had slayer's mom. Xander couldn't even be a nerd right. Maybe he can find a little kid that scraped his knee from falling on a bike. The door opened and Spike thinks he might have found the answer as Willow and Tara walk in. the wolf got Red but Glenda might be useful. She's technically still one.
Tara looked at Spike. "W-what?"
Spike just smiled. "Remember when I said you owe me one when I punched you in front of your family."
"N-no" Tara answered.
"Oh, well remember when I said I was cashing in." Spike replied.
Spike came back to the Summers' house with everything needed and Dawn made the cocktail. She had the syringe ready and started giving them shots.
Spike just looked at her. "So what are you going to call these blokes? And if you say Spike Jr. for the albino I'm going to find a way to bite you."
Dawn just smiled she read the book so she knows they already have names. "The cowboy is Six Shooter, your double with the hat is called Blade, The soldier's name is Tunneler, the big guys name is Pinhead, and well the jester is…Jester."
Dawn waits for them to come to life but nothing. Spike never being patient went downstairs for some blood.
Dawn watches as slowly they start twitching hands first then feet. Soon each puppet arises and gives a salute of respect to their newest Puppet Master. Dawn just nervously waves. "Umm hi guys."
Spike came in downing the last of his blood. Spike put the cup down and had his game face on from sucking blood. Six Shooter became alert for Dawn's safety and pulled out six mini revolvers and quickly emptied each gun into the blond vampire.
Spike buckled in pain thankfully little bullets just sting vampires. "Little bugger shot me!"
"What was that?" Joyce asked from downstairs.
"Watching a western" Dawn and Spike replied at the same time.
They both smile having the same idea and quip.
Dawn made formal introductions and swore Spike to secrecy. She spent the night with her new friends. Spike is just taking the scene in leave it to the Niblet to beat the laws of death in 6 hours. They all seem harmless enough Spike just wanted to make sure she didn't raise any puppet demons. Spike actually thinks this might actually be a good fit for the little bit. She has friends that aren't here for the slayer and if what Spike reads from the book is true these little guys would lay down their lives for her as long as she doesn't mistreat them.
A couple weeks later Buffy was on babysitting duty. Joyce was in a bad way and Dawn refused to leave. Buffy was downstairs doing the dishes. Dawn heard Joyce scream but Buffy didn't thanks to the radio.
Dawn ran into the room and was attacked by a slug like demon that was above Joyce's bed. Jester followed Dawn around he had a habit for doing it. Dawn went to jump on the creature's back but it knocked her aside. Jester's three heads spun repeatedly until they stopped with the puppet in a scare and he went to get the others. Dawn was knocked down and the Queller demon went to attack her. However before the Queller could get very far it fell flat on its stomach. Dawn looked behind it and saw that Blade had cut the tendons to his feet. The demon tried crawling to Dawn but was stopped by six bullet holes in his back by Six Shooter. The demon kept struggling until it was hit by a pink T ball bat across the back 3 times wielded by Pinhead. Dawn just smiled and Mom passed out. All the puppets had what Dawn thinks was smirks as they all turned to Tunneler. The top of Tunneler's head started spinning like a power drill and he ran right into the side of the Queller's head not stopping until it reached the brain killing the creature.
Dawn gathered up her tiny guardians and went straight for the bathroom Buffy is never going to believe this so she starts removing the evidence off the puppets. Halfway through cleaning she heard the front door open and Buffy shouted out frantically. Dawn speed cleaned and rushed to her room. The puppets hopped in their crate and Dawn ran into bed, the old pretending to sleep card. She heard four voices from the other room.
"Whoa someone had quite the party." Buffy quipped.
"Buffy do you have any idea what can kill a demon in the slayer's house without her noticing?" Riley asked.
"Does it really matter the sodding thing is dead." Spike added.
"Yeah but someone went to town on it." Buffy said. "Thing has been shot, carved up like a thanksgiving turkey, whacked with a blunt object and had a hole drilled into his head. I'll have Giles look into it in the morning."
"Buffy is everything OK?" Joyce asked
"Demons we're dealing I'm sleeping in here tonight and Spike is sleeping in Dawn's room." Buffy answered.
"Why Spike?" Riley asked clearly upset even if Dawn can't see him.
"I don't want another I don't like you incident." Buffy responded.
Spike just walked into Dawn's room and saw the scene. "Bloody hell they don't actually fall for that bit do they?"
Dawn got out of bed and shrugged. "Sometimes"
Spike just smirked. "You're friends know how to throw quite the party you should let big sis take them on patrol one night."
Dawn just opened the crate and let the puppets out. "Hey Buffy has her friends and I have mine. Speaking of my friends you mind holding them down I gotta give them shots and I haven't got it down like Andre Toulon yet apparently."
Spike looked at her they've done this once before and he was fine until the last one. "Fine but you're holding down ginsu boy."
"That just meant Blade likes you." Dawn responded earning a laugh from Six Shooter.
Dawn came downstairs missing everyone she knows. Apparently today is Scoobies vs. the British according to Giles. She comes downstairs with Blade and Tunneler following her. Dawn comes in and sees Buffy talking to another blond this must be that Glory chick she warned her about. Buffy gives her a look saying to get out of here before Glory sees her. Dawn goes for the stairs but Glory calls her back. Dawn moves slowly giving the puppets time to get upstairs and listen from there. Six Shooter, Pinhead, and Jester walk out and join the listening in. Dawn just walks into Glory's view.
Glory just looks Dawn over. "And you are just the darlin'-est thing I ever did see in my life. What's your name, honey?"
"Dawn"
Glory smirked. "Dawn? Did you know your sister took my key, Dawnie? And she won't give it back! I bet you know where she put it, don't you?
"She doesn't know anything." Buffy practically shouts.
Dawn looks at Buffy, annoyed. "I know some stuff." She can resurrect the dead if she wants.
Glory added fuel to fight. "I bet she takes your stuff all the time without asking, doesn't she? Where's my key, Dawn?"
"Go upstairs, Dawn." Buffy ordered.
Dawn shouts at Buffy. "You're always talking about stuff I'm not supposed to hear. I'm gonna figure it out, you know." Dawn leaves for the kitchen.
Glory grins. "Ooh, I like her. She's sassy." Glory's tone darkens. "And I'll kill her. I'll kill your mom, I'll kill your friends ... and I'll make you watch when I do. Just give me the key. You either have it or you know where to find it." Glory stands up. "Obviously, this is a one-time-only deal. Next time we meet, something you love dies bloody. You know you can't take me. You know you can't stop me."
She leaves. Buffy watches her go with a grim expression.
The puppets watched the scene they had a cruel reminder of Klaus the Nazi that they fought in World War 2. Jester was stuck in his scared face. Dawn took them to the magic shop once they saw Buffy train. If she can't beat the other woman, Dawn was their first master they've liked in a while. Blade wasn't going to let anything happen to her. Blade looked at the others and made a slitting throat motion with his knife across his throat showing his idea for Glory. Jester's face turns to a smile as they all the others puppets nodded grunted and laughed in agreement.
The puppets followed Glory all the way to the mansion she doesn't exactly blend in well with others. They work their way through the corridors in stealth making it past Glory's minions. They make it to Glory's room and everyone goes to hide while Six Shooter just falls to the floor.
Glory enters the room and shuts it stupid Slayer won't show her where her stupid key is. She looks down and sees a cowboy doll. Kind of a weird offering but it's the best the hell goddess has gotten recently. Six shooter laughs as his bandanna goes over his mouth and he shoots Glory six times. Glory glares and throws him at the wall.
All the remaining puppets come out of hiding and Glory stands tall ready to fight. "You little bastards are going to learn some respe…" Glory's thoughts are cut off as she feels him crawling to the surface. "No, not now you idiot!"
Glory changes to Ben and the intern looks around at the living puppets. "Um…hi?"
Blade runs up and slashes him across his foot with the hook on his hand. Pinhead grabs his other foot and pulls him to the floor back first. Blade stood on top of Ben's chest and stabbed him in the face with his knife. He started alternating between knife and hook for each swing. Jester found a nail file and stabbed him repeatedly in the stomach with it. Tunneler walked along his side until he got exactly where he needed to be and tunneled through Ben's chest straight to his heart. And the hell god's fight ended not with an epic bang against the slayer but a mere whimper at the hands of puppets.
Dawn was upstairs at Willow's computer it took a bit of detective work and draining her birthday money but the puppets Leech Woman, Decapitron, and Torch were found on EBay. Now if she could just find the others. Buffy rushed her and Joyce out of the house so fast she never got a chance to gather them. Dawn hears the faintest tap at the door. She opens it and sees all her puppets doused in blood.
"Please tell me it's not human." Dawn pleaded.
The puppets nod their heads as one.
Pinhead pointed to the chair Glory sat in and Blade did the cut his throat gesture. Dawn's eyes bugged. "You killed Buffy?"
Jesters head spins around to the scared face and he waves his arms in denial.
Dawn thinks it over no they had weeks to kill Buffy in her sleep they would have done it already. "No, not Buffy." Dawn's Jaw dropped. "Glory!"
The puppets once again nod and Six Shooter laughs.
Dawn held her hand to her head she wonders if this is what Giles feels once a week. "You guys...you could have gotten yourselves killed. But thank you for stopping her." Dawn will be the first to admit she was scared hearing how easily Glory whipped Buffy from Spike.
She took them all upstairs and cleaned them as Buffy came in. A god, Buffy's fought some tough things before but how is she supposed to fight that. Dawn came down the stairs as she crossed paths with her sister she got a strict don't leave the house. Dawn sighs like she'd leave the house at this point. She hears a knock and thanks to Buffy's training she stands behind the entrance way and opens it. She sees an army of robed demons.
"Slayer of the great Glorificus we pledge our servitude."
Dawn just silently nodded as she turned upstairs. "Buffy I have some things I need to talk to you about." Well she can take care of the puppets, and Buffy can take care of the demons and besides with how tiny these guys are they are the perfect scouts. Life on the hellmouth is about to get a lot more interesting.
THE END