Apologies for the lack of umlauts in 'Eyjafjallajokull'.

"Iceland!", yelled Switzerland. "You'd better clear up this damned ash cloud unless you want to be eating bullets!"

Iceland crossed his arms. How long was it going to take for the other countries to realize that this wasn't his fault? Didn't they realize that he was suffering too? Still Iceland knew better than to ignore Switzerland's threat. "My apologies. We're doing the best we can", he said.

Switzerland scowled, but moved away as Iceland felt a hand on his shoulder. "Do not threaten Iceland again, da?"

"Hello, Russia", greeted Iceland.

"You should clear up the ash before someone hurts you."

"I wish I could. I've already got Poland and England breathing down my neck." And Belgium, and Ireland, and Scotland, and Austria, and Denmark, and Lithuania, and Estonia, and Hungary, and Finland, and France, and Germany, and Norway, and Sweden... he continued mentally.

"Really? Perhaps I should pay them a little visit as well." Russia wandered off and Iceland started to cough. Damn that ash cloud!

"Heyy... Iceland..."

Oh, and look! Another country that wanted to kill him.

"Look, I'm working on it. The stupid cloud is-"

"Scotland cut him. "I don't give a bloody damn what you're doin' about the cloud."

"You don't?", asked Iceland hopefully.

"Look, I just need to borrow some cash for the bar, so..."

Iceland's spirits fell again. "From the look of things, you're already drunk, so no."

"I hate Iceland! I hate Iceland!" Scotland stumbled off, still shouting.

"Hello, Iceland."

"Hello again, Russia."

Russia's face darkened into a frown. "It's not good to have so many enemies. I'll have to deal with all them when you become one with me. But soon you'll all be united under Mother Russia!"

"Of course", agreed Iceland, not wanting to risk gaining yet another enemy.

"How nice! You agree that everyone should become one with me!" Russia pulled Iceland into a tight hug. Iceland struggled to breathe until he was released, then he staggered a few feet a away, coughing hard. Ordinarily, that wouldn't have hurt him at all. Add that to the list of reasons to hate that stupid cloud from that stupid volcano. Stupid Eyjafjallajokull. With a grim look, Iceland straightened himself up and started to walk. "Iceland! Where are you going?", called Russia.

"To find a pick axe." That volcano was going down.