okay so it's the real ending this time! Thank you all for so many great reviews! You were so amazing i sat at my laptop all day and just churned this one out. So sorry if there are mistakes, as usual. This is just a little quip of their own special happily-ever-after. So there's gunna be a whole hellofalotta corn. Warning you now. That's what happens when i write too much happiness at one time.

Enjoy!

Epilogue: Of the Five Year Old Family

"Damn-"

"Dang," Sasuke added from where he leant on the wall, arms crossed, still looking at the defiant children before the blonde. Naruto glared at the man for a second before continuing.

"Dang it, Haku! Why, why do you keep doing this stuff?" He threw up his hands just for emphasis. A little chortle behind the little blonde boy and blue eyes locked on narrow, thickly lashed black.

"You too, Ryuuko!" The girl was instantly serious, a slight blush coloring her round cheeks. "Don't think you're not in trouble too! I know you had just as big a part of this as Haku!" A whimper came from behind the girl and dark, almost black blue eyes peeked out. The little boy was quivering, clutching his big sister tightly from behind.

"Ushio, you're in trouble too; you shouldn't just follow what your brother and sister tell you to do!" The boy whimpered again, nodding furiously and Naruto gave a sigh. How many times had he yelled at Haku for stuff like this?

He looked back the result of the 'incident' or 'prank'. The kids, led by Haku once again, had spray-painted arrows on the streets and on walls, advertising free stuff and easy to win gambling and such. They then set up a small shop where they cheated all (not to mention adult) customers out of every penny they had.

Naruto looked at the huge pile of cash on the table, out the door where the victims sat shivering in their underwear, then back at big black eyes and pale yellow hair. How could one five year old cause so much trouble? Ryuu elbowed her little brother with a coy smirk and Naruto changed his previous assessment. How could two five year olds cause so much havoc? The blonde shook his head, sighing exasperatedly.

A little chorus of angel voices sounded below him and Naruto glanced down to see them all at their usual cherubic apologies. "We're sorry Daddy; we won't do it again." They only called him dad when they wanted something.

Naruto scoffed, knowing the only real apology came from the Ushio, who stood a few inches shorter than his siblings, quickly losing his battle with incoming tears.

Sasuke pushed up from where he leant against the wall, away from the situation, looking seriously at his children. Maybe when Sasuke got involved they would listen. The raven-haired man knelt, still serious, in front of the triplets and sat one hand heavily on Haku's shoulder, the other on Ryuu's on the opposite side. His eyes glittered as they moved from one little face to the next, encompassing them all in a tense little bubble.

"You're all very sorry?" All children nodded furiously. His pale face broke into a small smile and all the kids rushed to embrace him, their little arms wrapping tightly around the tall Uchiha's alabaster neck, kissing and snuggling. Naruto sighed; what was he expecting?

Sasuke's low satin voice whispered to his children after awhile. "Now, go apologize to Naruto again. Make it real this time."

And suddenly they were all gone from the raven, rushing to crowd their mother's knees, clutching his pants and nuzzling their faces in the cloth. Ushio had lost his battle long ago and was now squeezing fat tears from quickly swelling eyes. Naruto didn't miss the little victorious smirk that decorated Haku's handsome face and Ryuu's beautiful one.

The blonde gave in, kneeling down to hug and kiss each chubby cheek before getting up and assigning punishments; mainly just that they give all the money back. He didn't miss Haku stuffing a few bills inside his shirt and Ryuu shoving an entire wad down her pants. Then she turned and held Ushio's shaking hand supportively, smiling at the boy.

Naruto glared at Sasuke and walked into the kitchen, grabbing some dishes and dumping them in the dishwasher. The raven followed suit, but he wrapped an apron around himself and stared the dishes.

"You're too easy on them you know. They're spoiled rotten." He only got a smirk from the tall man.

"And you're too hard sometimes. Who would have known you'd be the strict one, dobe."

Naruto ignored the chuckle and punched the raven in the arm. "It was just my turn tonight. And only with some stuff. But I mean, how do five-year-olds get into these things? A rigged gambling house?" Blonde hair shook in the florescent lighting as the boy scratched his head exasperatedly.

Sasuke only shrugged. "They are our kids after all; of course they'd be so smart. I think Ushio's close to developing his sharingan. I saw it flash when we were training earlier."

"So soon?" The raven nodded. "Ryuu too, but hers might take a while longer. Haku will as well."

"Incredible; just think of the messes they'll cause then." Naruto leant back against the counter as Sasuke finished up, wiping large pale hands on the pastel pink apron before untying it and setting it on the counter. He stepped towards Naruto and the blonde felt heat flash through his chest as long arms wrapped around his waist. He rested an aching forehead on the stony chest, eyes fluttering closed. A little ripple of excitement had him shivering.

"Are you nervous?" The raven whispered in his ear, hands rubbing circles across the man's back. Yes, very much.

"No. I'm the one who proposed anyways; you should be the nervous one." Naruto thumbed the white-gold band that warmed his skin. It was tomorrow. He repressed another shudder.

"Hn." They just sat there for a while until Haku walked in, they both turned, seeing him make a face of pure horror and run back out. Sasuke chuckled and Naruto sighed, his head falling back to the cradle of his shoulders.

Pale fingers reached his jaw to pull him into a deep kiss when a few cries could be heard from deep in the Uchiha Compound mansion. Naruto groaned and Sasuke sighed. Ryuu came bounding in, looking nervous from the news Haku brought about their parents getting nasty.

"Um…the twins are up, daddy." Sasuke pushed back from where he had Naruto pressed against the counter, going over to rub his only daughter's silky black hair.

"I know, Ryuu. I'm going to check them now." She beamed and Naruto felt something pull in his chest at how incredibly soft Sasuke's expression got, he'd practically melted to butter with just his daughter's smile. It was a very nice thing to see. She would soon become the biggest brat. Naruto smiled in defeat and closed his eyes for a moment, popping them open to watch the rest. It was addicting, cheesy as it was.

As if to add to the effect Ryuu leaned over and planted a big kiss on her father's cheek; Naruto watched through curious eyes as the raven became a collective puddle on the floor. More urgent cries from the other end of the house woke the man and he stood again, turning to face Naruto for a second, features still soft before walking to tend to the twins.

Ryuu looked after her dad before turning to her mother, beckoning with thick little fingers for him to lean down. She cupped her hands around the boy's ear and tried her best to whisper.

"Everybody thinks daddy's scary, but me and you know the truth," She giggled before continuing "He's really squashy inside like Ushio."

Naruto snorted a laugh before nodding and the little girl followed suit, then planted a kiss on his cheek and running off to enjoy her last few conscious moments before bedtime. He really hoped she wouldn't be so liberal with her kisses in the future; with her looks, she would have the entire academy, no, the village at her feet. He smiled, watching her run down the hall in a whirl of long, spiky black hair.

The crying from across the house had stopped but Naruto walked up the stairs anyways, hand resting on his stomach out of habit. When he reached the second story he made his way to the twin's room, where he saw Sasuke rocking one to sleep in his arms.

The blonde leant against the doorframe, blue eyes watching the rare tender scene. The twins had happened like their older siblings; on accident. Sasuke, a six month mission and a broken condom just don't make for smart decisions. He smiled at the memory. Unlike their older siblings, the twins were identical whereas the triplets were fraternal. They looked exactly alike except for one thing; one was blonde.

It had mystified even Tsunade, who had acted as OBGYN this time. So far they were blaming it on Kyuubi's ever present influence. Said influence was very carefully marked on each little miracle face it had produced; very faint whisker marks became apparent on each child after the age of one, visible only against direct sunlight. The two-year-old twins had them too.

Naruto pushed against the frame to walk into the room, touching his fiancé on the shoulder to announce himself. Sasuke smirked at him from around the little raven haired child he held and the man smiled back, looking into the walled bed. The twins would not sleep unless in the same bed; they had learned that out of experience and many sleepless nights in the beginning. Inside, big stormy blue eyes stared up at him and Naruto smiled. Youuji smiled back. Yuuki grunted in Sasuke's arms.

"Daddy," The boy's small voice came, still very groggy. "Youuji kicked me." Obviously the cries had come from Yuuki. The boy stared impassively from the bed, pale features smooth of guilt. Naruto picked the boy up, loving it as those chubby little arms wrapped around his neck.

"Youuji, is that true?" He murmured and the boy nodded, still not looking the least bit affected. "Then you need to apologize to your brother." Gray-blue eyes stared at Naruto's for a long moment before the boy faced his twin.

"Sorry, Yuuki." The raven grinned, instantly forgiving his blonde counterpart.

"It's okay."

Naruto sighed in relief. "Alright, now that this is settled, you both need to get some sleep. We all have a very big day tomorrow." He looked animatedly at each knowing little face.

"Can you tell me what's happening tomorrow?" The twins looked at each other before answering simultaneously. "Mom and Dad are getting married." They'd heard about it so much it was an unexcited statement. Naruto broke into a grin and Sasuke smirked as the boys giggled.

"Alright, now give your mother a kiss goodnight." Naruto glared and Sasuke effectively ignored it, leaning his charge in so the boy could plant a wet kiss on his cheek, tiny arms wrapping around his neck for a second before they switched and everyone ended up with two wet spots. Putting the boys back into their bed and switching off the lights, Naruto strode from the room to be almost knocked over in the hallway by a train of running toddlers.

"Hey," Sasuke barely called and all three stuttered to a halt, turning back half-fearfully. "No running when your mom's like this. You know the rules." The raven-haired man came from behind; ignoring Naruto's rolling eyes and burning temper to weave a hand under the other man's arm, massaging his overheated stomach. All three heads nodded and they kept running again.

"You," He looked at Sasuke seriously, blue eyes burning "Mom my ass. Call me Daddy." Sasuke raised one eyebrow and the blonde growled. Sasuke broke the tense moment with a kiss and no promises.

"Five minutes before bed!" Naruto called, shaking his head with a wide grin; his hand rested over Sasuke's on his stomach. Their latest and final. This one had been after a particularly dangerous mission coupled with Naruto's becoming the next in line for Hokage.

There hadn't even been a condom this time, thinking stupidly that Kyuubi would be more than satisfied with five kids already. They were very wrong; but at least this one was a single. That and, although it was too early for an ultrasound, Naruto had a 'feeling' it would be a girl. It would be a girl and she would have flaming red hair, like so many of the older generation said Naruto's mother had had. He smiled, playing with the band on Sasuke's warm finger.

Thinking about it all always made little nervous shivers crawl up his spine. So much had happened in the past five years, it was hard to keep it all in check. He took a deep breath and stretched, walking into the kitchen to turn off the lights.

Leaning against the wall, Naruto took a deep breath. This was his life; blissfully happy to the point of it being scary. One person wasn't meant to be this happy all at once; it had to mean that something bad was going to happen soon. A bubble of nerves shivered up his spine, sending steel butterflies ricocheting off his chest.

"There's nothing to be nervous about, dobe." Sasuke walked in, already changed into some black sweatpants to sleep in.

Naruto only glared "I'm not nervous, teme." Narrow black eyes glittered in the moonlight and Sasuke smirked. "Hn."

Blue eyes closed in a foxy grin as Naruto tried to make himself feel better "Let's go to bed; we have a big day tomorrow." He reached out, wrapping tan fingers around pale to lead the man down the hallway to their bedroom. Faint crayon drawings marked the whitewashed walls.

Yes;

Six kids.

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His stomach was about to burst out his mouth; he could feel the acidic stain burning the back of his throat. His collar was choking him. The small crowd of people they stood in front of stirred and Naruto stopped walking, coming to a halt in front of the alter arm in arm with the guy he would spend the rest of his life with.

He gulped, hands twitching. Sasuke looked as impassive as ever, pale features not giving anything on his feelings. Black eyes were just as blank. Naruto's mouth was dry; he felt his tongue stick to the roof of it as he wriggled it around. Tsunade looked radiant and professional in her dark blue dress, her hands busy with book of her lines. They both wore white. It had been a game of rock-paper-scissors, one that would decide whether they wore all black (Sasuke's idea) or all white (Naruto's idea tweaked from orange by Sasuke).

Initially Sasuke was about to win and Naruto, feeling a defeat he could and would not agree with, thought quickly and tackled the man, beating him into submission. They ended up wearing white. He raised a hand to tug at his collar and Sasuke whispered across the space between them.

"Quit fidgeting," Naruto glared at him nervously, and Sasuke gave a little smirk "It's going to be fine."

The blonde nodded once and took a deep breath, looking out over the people. He couldn't look at Sasuke or he'd break out sweating even more. The raven-haired Uchiha was stunning beyond measure in his all-white tux, and Naruto could practically hear every woman in a several mile distance's drool puddle on the floor below them in awe. Imagine being less than a foot away from such glory; the damn bastard.

So instead of blinding himself looking at Sasuke while Tsunade talked, the blonde grazed blue eyes over the audience. It had been entirely Sakura's fault they were having a real wedding, both men had just wanted a courtroom and the legal document. Oh, and the week off from missions that constituted their honeymoon. But hell, life never comes quite the way you want it to. A little hand waved from the front row and blue eyes were drawn to Haku, who was sitting looking supremely satisfied with himself snuggled deep in Sakura's silver dress-clad lap, his little playboy blonde head resting comfortably on the pillow of her breasts.

Naruto grinned at him, then at his other children who sat in various seats and laps in the front row, watching attentively as their parents finally got married. He was brought roughly back to the present when Sasuke announced something, grabbing the surprised man's hand with a smirk, pushing the white-gold wedding ring on. Black eyes stared through him intensely and Naruto cleared his throat. It was his turn already.

The man took hold of his love's pale hand, his own calloused tan one singling out the boy's ring finger. Sasuke's hands were shaking. The blonde looked up to Sasuke's impassive face, wide blue eyes searching. So Sasuke had been just as nervous as him. He grinned, pushing the ring unto the Uchiha's finger.

"I do." He shuddered; those were ominous words. But Sasuke chose that second to break into a tiny smile and all doubts Naruto had festered flew away swiftly, Tsunade uttering something about kissing but the blonde already had his hands gripping the handsome raven's face, bringing their lips crashing together in their first marital kiss. It was a good kiss. It was a binding kiss.

The crowd roared to life from the chains of boredom and the couple stared at each other; Naruto grinning, Sasuke smirking. All five kids rushed up the steps to the altar, grabbing and pulling at their parents to look at the new rings or steal Tsunade's book or yell their congratulations.

Far away from the commotion, sitting on a pale blanket in the mid-spring sunshine sat a dark haired man who smiled lightly from where he sat, looking at the backs of his eyelids as the blonde next to him described the ceremony.

"And now they're all bloody messes, there's limbs everywhere, hangin' off the arch, the alter covered in gore. A sight to see, un." Itachi chuckled and Deidara huffed.

"Look like ants, un. I wonder what they look like exploding from way up here, hm?" Itachi only smiled at Deidara, hearing his heart speed up.

"That would not be a good idea, Deidara." The little boy at their side quipped in, grinning.

"Yeah, that'd probably send Daddy's moody little brother into a depression." Deidara growled at the boy, smacking him hard upside the head.

"You shut up, un! Who said ya could talk, eh? I still haven't forgiven ya, ya little brat." The boy whimpered and rubbed his head. Itachi reached to squeeze Deidara's fingers, then extended a hand to his adopted stray son.

Below them, inside the Uchiha compound the reception had started. Naruto grinned wider as Iruka made his appearance, then the grin disappeared into a look of recent trauma when Kakashi appeared behind the teacher, whispering something in his hear that spread a wide blush across his cheeks.

Naruto shuddered at the sight; he'd visited Iruka spontaneously a few months ago and well… there was nothing more to say other than that he'd left running. It would be a while before he could look either man in the eyes without blushing or itching to run. Beside him Sasuke sighed deeply, running pale fingers through black silk locks in social exhaustion. Sasuke didn't like people, and all these people coming up to congratulate them were obviously getting on his nerves.

The people were all tentative in their well wishes, the ones who didn't know the couple very personally anyways. No one wanted to risk upsetting Konoha's most powerful Anbu captain to date or his new spouse, the next in line soon to be Rokudaime. He grinned a silent encouragement to the brave supporters, shaking their hands and such.

Something crashed in the distance and Naruto tensed, blue eyes flashing up to view something he really rather not have. All their kids- He groaned loudly, Sasuke chuckled behind him as the blonde pulled them to the crime scene.

Their wedding cake was now a whitish blanket coating two giggling two-year-olds who played in it like it was snow, rubbing frosting into each other's faces, one black-eyed blonde who was stuffing his face, grinning and high-fiving his older sister, who grinned equally widely, long black lashes fluttering their new sugary white coating, and one blue-eyed, tan little boy who chortled with his siblings in the cake bath.

Naruto felt large fingers intertwine with his and he looked back, exasperation clear in his eyes. Sasuke only chuckled at him and the blonde man sighed and smiled impishly, leaning over to do the unthinkable.

Long tan fingers scooped off a large chunk of frosting, grinning and hurling it to his husband's shocked pale face. He giggled, followed by a very unmanly snort as Sasuke wiped his face, looking seriously at Naruto as he swabbed the man's tan face with the remnants.

He laughed aloud, watching amusement sparkle Sasuke's eyes as the children learned the new game and started flinging cake at the various guests, from Tsunade to Sakura to Iruka to Gaara, everyone ended up with a little cake in the face. Naruto's face and tux were covered by the end, as was Sasuke's, but neither noticed, too busy taking the first savor of their cake. Naruto grinned at his new husband, leaning in for another taste.

He'd never seen Sasuke so excited over something so sweet.

END.

(AN) That's right; END. I have sucessfully self-produced enough corn in this chapter to feed all the hungry in the world. Again i say ah, the wonders of the human brain elude me.

So sad. V.V

Thank you all for reading and reviewing my story! I love you all forever.

Love.

Bright Eyed.

btw. Look out for my new story coming soon! ^^