I own nothing. All those lovely characters belong to the amazing Stephenie Meyer.

I am from Germany, so my English isn´t perfect, but I hope I tried my best.

I wrote this for a good friend of me.

Hope you enjoy it!


Promises are the uniquely human way of ordering the future.

Hannah Arendt

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He had promised. All those years ago. Promised to leave my mind, my thoughts, my memories the moment he stepped out of my life, taking me with him, leaving my body as a shell, empty and broken, all alone. Weak and vulnerable, unwilling to let go of the precious memories which were, though he'd promised the opposite, still in my head.

Life had meant little to me those days. I lived only because I knew how much it would hurt my parents to loose me.

But there had been another reason for me to keep on breathing, letting my heart beat and violently pushing myself out of bed every single morning to face another day instead of just staying there, immobile, and waiting for my time to pass.

Apart from all the pain and emptiness I felt inside of me, there was still hope. And it kept me going. The hope that he might change his mind one day and return to me.

Hope was black and white. I hoped, but I knew at the same time that he would not come back. He was gone. In the truest sense of the word, gone forever.

It had taken me a year of my life before I finally started to feel the need to breathe again, the value of every single heartbeat. A year and Jacob. After all I finally started to consider the possibility to find something else worth living for. And I did.

Another six months of doubt, frustration and the endless feeling to have to find someone better than me to love Jacob just the way he deserved.

But in the end I finally realized that he wanted no one else but me, that he knew I would never love him the way I once loved Edward, that the remaining pieces of my old self were enough for him. All that made me love him in return. More than I had once thought possible.

I was happy again.

And with each passing day Edwards promise seemed to finally come true. He left me, a little bit more every day. I let my mind erase what hurt me, something I had so desperately tried to prevent before, afraid to completely forget him, afraid he would one day just be something about which you have to wonder whether it had been a dream or reality. But now, I knew I had to.

I realized that my life had never been bound to Edward. That was just what I had felt. But I had been wrong. This was my life and I was the only one in control of it.

I was alive again. And I was suddenly ambitious to make up for what I'd lost, the year I had wasted. Graduation went more than well, college was set, my time with Jacob and my family planned, a visit to Florida in the making. Everything suddenly started to work out just the way I wanted it to.

Still, there was a shadow above all my sudden luck. And it was red-haired and vicious. Victoria.

She, along with fading memories and a scar at my wrist, was the last reminder of my past.

For three years she haunted me, visiting me in my dreams, forcing the pack to chase her, keeping me in unbearable fear to loose any one them, especially Jacob. He was most important to me now and I couldn't stand the thought of loosing him because of my past. It would again be my fault.

He always tried to soothe me. Whenever he visited me or I was in Forks over the weekends he attempted to impress me with his strength, showing me how nothing could ever brake him.

He never convinced me. But he made me smile. And smiling always makes things easier.

Then one day, she vanished. Suddenly my countless nightmares of the red-haired beauty climbing through my window like a cat were gone. No more cursed dreams in which I saw Jacobs lifeless eyes. She was gone.

And nobody could explain why. We were all worried, afraid it was another of her diabolical plans to catch me. But after another year had passed without any sign of my living nightmare we all settled with the thought that some force had crossed her path, whatever it was - we couldn't explain -, which had stopped her or at least distracted her.

So for the time being, nothing inflicted my happiness.

And nothing had really changed about that peace - until today.

It had started out to be a day like every other, still, a little sunnier and brighter than days usually were in La Push, but on the whole, average.

Jacob woke me with a soft kiss on my nose and a whispered "Morning, honey." And so another day had started with blushed cheeks and a shy smile on my face.

Breakfast was a long procedure, just like every day.

Jacob went off to his garage and I was left with getting the kids ready. Just like every other day.

I dropped Emma off at school, kissing her head, covered by thick, black hair, and waved her goodbye, feeling the familiar agony to see her leaving. Just like every day.

Noah denied me a kiss on his cheek in front of his friends when I dropped him off at his nursery school, but still whispering a "Love you, Mum." into my ear. Just like every day.

My eyes lasted on the horizon, far away over the ocean, when I passed First Beach on my way to Forks. Just like every day.

The one slight difference was that I wasn't heading to work today. It was Charlie's house I planned to go to. He had renovated my old room, which had been a guestroom ever since I moved out. Well, for the most part it had been me choosing the colours and Jacob repapering the walls.

So today, it was my turn again to arrange the furniture and decorate. And I was looking forward to do so. A day off - I really needed that.

My thoughts were calm and nicely easy to think at first while I drove at a steady pace toward my old house.

Mostly I was planning the rest of my day. What would do after finishing the room? Lunch for Charlie? Some clean-up at home? A walk on First Beach? Helping Jacob in the garage? Maybe I could visit Emily again before I picked up the kids and made their lunch…

I was totally lost in my thoughts and couldn't quite follow them anymore after a while. By the time I approached Charlie's house I had landed on a blue summer dress and asking Jacob about a trip to Canada this winter.

There were road works in front of Charlie's house, so I stopped the car around a corner and stepped out into the soft breeze of the wind….


Well, I know the first chapter is kind of boring, but there will me more exciting stuff during the next chapters. Please review and tell what you like ord what you didn´t like so I can improve my writing.