A/N: A multichap fic. I wonder if I'll update regularly. I'm a very good procrastinator. :nervous laugh: This chapter is for Burakku's Shadow for getting me started on it. Please enjoy! And feel free to flame me or tell me my writing sucks, but just be good about it and tell me how exactly do I suck and I'll try to work on it. A/N end

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The morning sun filtered over the autumn leaves, while the fresh breeze sighed past chirping birds looking for breakfast.

Everywhere else, people were getting out of bed, with a warm cup of coffee between their hands, wishing each other a good morning, smiling and telling themselves that this will be a good day-

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!!" The green-haired teenager yelled, throwing his alarm clock into the wall. The alarm clock smashed into pieces and lay quietly in the disturbed cobwebs, not saying anything, which irritated the teen even more. Muttering curses under his breath, he slid out of bed and tumbled into the bathroom, splashing cold water over his face in an effort to wake himself a bit more.

"Stupid school waking us up at this ungodly hour..." He snarled at his own reflection, violet eyes staring angrily at the mirror, which could do nothing but stare back.

He turned and stomped over to his closet, pulling down random articles of clothing, mostly black, though there were some hints of dark forest green and silky violet.

Snatching up his usual 'school attire', which consisted of a cropped top and skort, he changed hurriedly and snatched up his bag, turning off the lights as he went out.

He crossed the landing and pounded on a peach-colored door.

"WRATH!! Get your lazy arse off that bed and WAKE UP ALREADY!!"

Wrath replied with a growl and a ruder version of "I was already up by your yelling!"

Envy moved away from the door and fixed a look of horror and disbelief onto his brother's door.

The door slammed open, and fast as lightning, Envy's hand was slammed down onto Wrath's head. The younger boy yelped, and turned big, round eyes onto his older brother, wondering for a moment if he'll kill him.

"Where did you learn so many words?" Envy questioned, raising one eyebrow.

"Um... I'm guessing you mean the morning swearing? I saw it on the net." Wrath replied, a little embarrassed.

Envy blinked and grin. "That's it, kid. Keep those up and you'll survive pretty well. Now, what do you do if a girl irritates you?"

Wrath grinned. "Tell her she looks like something the cat dragged in and then spit on her."

"Ah... Good. You're ready, kid." Envy smiled as the pair made their way downstairs.

-----

Roy Mustang, at that moment, was in his convertible, a dark blue Mercedes that was purring softly as he drew his car to a stop in front of a large white house. A blonde emerged from the house, throwing her head back and said a 'goodbye' to her dad, before locking the door and making her way to the car.

Roy grinned a 'good morning' to her, and checked his hair. He wasn't called a ladies' man for nothing, with a inky dark hair that contrasted with his white features, dark eyes that 'you can just lose yourself in' and his lips, always curled up into that smirk for the ladies.

Riza handed him his cup of coffee and told him to hurry up, or else they'd be late.

-----

They made it in time, with girls gasping and giggling when they saw Roy, clearly taken by him charing smiles and corny lines.

He strutted through the hallway, with people on all sides parting to give him way. He smiled at each of them and sometimes even waved. Roy relished in the popularity. He was happy with his life as it is now- girls, power, mini-skirts. Although he wouldn't mind having someone out of his sight, he thought as he growled and narrowed his eyes at the skinny green-haired teen walking down the hall towards him, talking to a younger version of Envy, complete with forest green hair in a tangle. Roy cringed inwardly. He needs conditioner.

But really, he thought, eyeing the two up and down, he could swear the family were from a different planet. What with the weird names and cross-dressing fetishes, crazy hair color -they said it was natural- and inhuman fighting strength and speed, they have to be from otherworldly origins, possibly from outer space or North Korea.

Violet eyes clashed with ebony black ones, and Envy narrowed his eyes. He muttered something into the younger teen's ear and pointed at Roy. The young teen looked at Roy, surprised, and stuck out his tongue. Roy couldn't help the look of disgust that flitted across his face. But, no. No, he has to keep his face in a smirk, for all the ladies. He gave the two teens one last glance-over, and turned down the hall.

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"Now that," Envy said to Warth, "Is the biggest bastard you will ever meet." Wrath blinked and zoomed in on a tall senior with a gaggle of whores stringing off his arm. "That's the Flaming Pony?"

Envy smirked and ruffled his brother's hair even more.

Wrath took that as a yes.

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"AL!! Where's my shirt?" screamed a very hysterical blonde teen, clothed in a pair of leather pants and his long hair tied in a braid.

"Here, brother." Alphonse threw the shirt at his older brother, sighing inwardly at his childish behavior. Did he really need to scream? And when he was just in the next room, in this dinky cramped apartment?

Edward grabbed his bag and snatched up a piece of toast, munching on it as he did his boots. Alphonse has no idea why Edward put up with those killer boots, it took at least 5 minutes to get all the complex strings tied up. Edward said it was handy for kicking people, but Alphonse suspected that he wore it only to look taller.

"C'mon, Al! We're going to be late."

Alphonse gave a sort of dry chuckle.

"Usually I'm the one screaming at you to wake up, brother."

Edward scowled.

"Only because today is the first day of school and I don't want to get side-tracked. That has happened enough."

"Side-tracked? Brother, we're always late on the first day of school because new kids will call you short and you just have to resort to violence every time."

Edward gave Alphonse a blank stare.

"And so I'm up early today. I expected a nicer acknowledgement from you."

Alphonse sighed and locked the door behind him.

"Okay, brother. Let's go." He grinned at the older boy.

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Only ten minutes into campus and three people have told Edward that the preschool is across the road. Alphonse had to drag the ranting and furious teen into the building, murmuring into his brother's ear that he was making a fool of himself. Not to mention the humiliation.

Knocking on the door of the school office, Alphonse gripped Edward and stared hard at him, promising that if he didn't stop right now, Al will torture him-in many ways.

Edward cringed. Al was a very nice person. That is, until one has been through the Torture. Not physical torture, no. Al wouldn't hurt a fly. But he will put milk in your coffee, refuse to clean up your room, and purposefully stash your class notes somewhere else before the day of the test. "Yes, Al." he said, meekly.

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He was late!! Late!! And why was he late when he actually took the pains to wake up in time for this whole 'first day in school' thing? Well, ask the secretary, who had their timetables and school map with her. I mean, it isn't polite to ask her to stop eating the headmaster's face -who was balding, by the way- just to give two new students their timetables and smile fake smiles at them, asking if they had any questions and expecting the usual shake of the head as an answer.

No, by the time he got his timetable and worked out the map -which was extremely complicated and had coffee stains on it- the bell had rung. Then he noticed his class was at the top floor of another building, pretty much all the way across the whole area of the school.

Which explained why he was running and grunting profanities under his breath, skidding around corners and scaring teachers.

It doesn't help that he knew Al's class was just across the hall from the principle's office, and the secretary had offered to bring him there, because he was younger. And because he smiled at you and called you a miss, you old hag. Edward seethed. Now Al won't get into trouble and all will be happy for him, while his older brother was left to sprint across the school to get to his lousy class.

Karma is a bitch.

Skidding into a halt in front of an old classroom, he wondered briefly if this wasn't some kind of sick joke some idiot played on him. Central High had been full of promises, newest technology, smart teachers, nice students and a 'healthy, exceptional studying environment for the academic advancement of our students'. Instead, Edward had been thrown in with rude students, a scathing secretary, an unhelpful teacher and now, a worn down, paint-peeling battered classroom which, judging by the ruckus, was nothing like a 'healthy, exceptional studying environment'. This kind of environment weren't even for studying of any kind.

Poking his head cautiously into the classroom, he coughed quietly into his hand to get the attention of his teacher. Unfortunately, his teacher's attention was secured by a group of young boys throwing their text books around. Golden eyes flashed helplessly, not knowing how to act in these kind of situations. Of course, one should yell out, as politely as one could when yelling, for the teacher. But poor Edward had grew up in a small, enclosed world where children -but he's not a kid!- are supposed to be seen, not heard, and yelling at an adult is like digging one's own grave.

It wasn't until one kid sitting in the front row noticed Edward that the teacher was made known of his presence.

Mr. Tucker hurriedly straightened his glasses and flashed Edward a tired smile. He shuffled -shuffled, not walked- to Edward, and frowned at his class, as if asking them to 'be quiet while I see what this kid wants'.

Edward had hoped against hope that his teacher won't mistaken him for a kid-again, for the 14th time in two hours- and then he won't have a valid reason to blow up in the teacher's face. But Edward knew a lost cause when he saw one. The slightly insane look in his eyes, those chapped lips forming that never-to-be-uttered-again damned sentence.

"Hey, kid. You lost?"

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Envy looked at the new kid, a little displeased. That shrimp sure had quite the lung capacity. In fact, he was so loud, Envy was getting a throbbing headache. And when Envy got a headache, he was murderous.

-----

Roy Mustang was happily ignoring Mr. Tucker and have girls swooning over him when he suddenly heard a very loud and rude shout. He looked in shock as a short blonde -who had the tightest ass I've ever seen- started hurling insults at Mr. Tucker and the Asian kid in the front row for mistaking him as a kid.

Man, he's pretty.

And that leather pants make his ass look so damned rapable.

Bad thought, bad thought.

It wasn't that he'd done it with boys too, but the fact that this boy looked like those kind of people who hung on to relationships, if he were ever to get into one.

Roy grimaced.

That's too bad then. But maybe he should go for him, an ass like that doesn't just walk into your class accompanied by a pretty face and loud screaming everyday. It'll teach him that relationships are never 'forever'. Once he's got his heart broken, he'll get over that fairy tale.

But first, he's got to do something about the screaming.

That and Envy is nearing breaking point.

-----

Things happened all at once. Edward stopped screaming, Envy jumped up and yelled at him to 'shut his pie-hole' and Roy very suavely walked downed and pulled Edward into an empty seat beside him, glaring at Envy who flipped him the bird.

The class resumed its chaos and Mr. Tucker threw his hands up in defeat and slumped onto the teacher's desk.

Edward was mobbed by curvy blondes and flirty brunettes all bent on running their hands through his hair and messing up his braid and flinging comments like 'He's so cute!' 'Aww, his hair is so soft!' and some not so innocent high-pitched whispers like 'His ass is so gorgeous!' 'Hot bod!'. Seriously, did they think he wouldn't hear?

Roy was lounging in his hair, taking in the scene in front of him with barely concealed laughter. Edward was looking like a cornered rabbit, the expression on his face screaming 'OH GROSS THEY'RE TOUCHING MY HAIR!!'. He let out a small chuckle. Edward gave him a scandalized look and silently promised that he will kill him at break. This made him chuckle again.

"Don't even think about it, shorty."

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Yay! I finished it! The line about karma being a bitch? I don't hate karma, but it seemed fitting. :D Please review, people! It's not so hard to click that green button, is it? Get into the Christmas spirit and give me some happiness! Merry Christmas!

Next chapter: Lunch break, Ling, and Wrath. Throw a ranting shrimp and a homicidal palm tree into the mix and you'll get complete chaos.