Uhm… hi. So… This… may be where we run out of marvelous ideas to entertain… Uhm… you wanna sell something?
Well because you interrupted me quite rudely last time, I don't remember what I was going to sell! Here, I'll go look in my closet for something.
And while she's gone… I'll think of a title… So this chapter's title should be…
How do you think they'd like a stuffed animal bear with a camera in its head? Fun at parties!
They wouldn't! Who would want that?
Okay, how about… A sheep wrangler!
A what?
Ya know, a sheep wrangler! It wrangles sheeps!
No, I don't think they're interested in that either... The title should be simpler than our past titles, don't you think?
Oh! How about this!
Uhm… What's a this?
A pencil that you never have to sharpen yet you can't erase!
That's called a pen, Penguin.
How about this dried piece of gum?
Chaos!
What?
That's the chapter title, chaos!
Okay, it'll work.
Okay then, Chapter 6: Chaos
Wait, are you sure they don't want this dried piece of gum? It's antique! Worth millions!
*ends author's note*
"Lily, I really don't think we should leave yet. I mean, look at all the people still at the restaurant!" James pleaded with his wife.
"No, James, I miss my Harry, and we've already been here for three hours. I'm definitely ready to go now." Lily responded.
"But Lily, we really shouldn't go yet… It's been such a great evening!" James was begging.
"No, James I'm ready to go now." Lily summoned the waiter. "Check please."
"Wait! Don't you want some dessert?!"
Meanwhile…
Remus had walked out of the bathroom while fixing his uneven shirt only to be met with screaming. He looked up immediately to see what had happened…
"Remus!! Help!!"
"Sirius?! What's going on?!"
"Who's got the beer?!"
"Sirius, where'd all these people come from?!"
"I don't… WILMA WHY ARE YOU NAKED?!"
"Where's Harry?"
"Last time I saw him…"
"WHEEEE!"
"DUCK!"
Meanwhile…
"James, I really want to go now."
"But Lily, this park is just so beautiful at night! Don't you want to look around some more?"
"We've walked around this park twice now, James, it's not that amazing."
"But, I don't think that you're taking in the true beauty of the nature and the scenery…"
"James, I'm leaving now."
"Okay! Let's side along apparate!"
"James, I know how to apparate—" James grasped her arm and with a pop they were gone.
Back at the house…
"From what?!"
"No! I found a duck in the bathtub!"
"Hey! A goat!"
"Who's the fat dude?!"
"Who are any of these people?!"
"Wilma! Put some clothes on!"
"Where's Harry?!"
"WHEEE!"
"Get off the chandelier!"
"Since when was there ever a chandelier?!"
"REMUS!!!"
"What?!"
"I'm being eaten!!"
"By what?!"
"The goat!!"
"What goat!?"
"It's eating my hair!!"
"Sirius how long was I gone?!"
"A few minutes—OH MY GOD!"
Meanwhile…
"James, why are we in India?"
Meanwhile…
"What?!"
"There's an elephant with dancing girls on it!!"
"How did an elephant get in here?!"
"Hey!! What punk took my drugs!? Was it you?!"
"Me?! What? No! I've never done drugs in my life…"
"I KNEW IT WAS YOU! YOU GET BACK HERE PUNK!"
"AHHH!"
"WHEEE!"
"I found Harry!"
"Smush! Smush! Smush!"
"AHHHH!"
Meanwhile in India…
"I thought we'd look at the culture and beauty..?"
"James, we're in a dark ally filled with sketchy people who probably want to rape us. I don't know what's wrong with you, but I'm going home."
"No! Wait!" But with a pop she was gone.
"Hey mister! Want to buy a kitten?" The man with the accent opened up his trench coat which was filled with, well, kittens... James apparated seconds later with another pop.
"Lily!!" James screeched as he watched his wife open the door to their house. "No!" James bolted for the door and when he got in there, looking wide eyed and disheveled, he saw that everything was just perfect…
"Lily, darling, how was your evening?" Remus asked.
"James, you do look like a wreck." Sirius interjected.
"Daddy!" Harry flailed happily.
"I… I… I…" James was lost for words. "I knew I could trust you! Here's your wand back, Sirius."
"I have to admit, James, I'm impressed that the house is burned down or anything."
"Amaze you, Lily-flower?" Sirius asked smoothly.
"Yes, actually, you did. Tonight might actually be relaxing… Wait, lemme see the closet." Lily started toward the closet.
"Lily, there's a funny story, really. It's just… You might not find it funny until later."
Lily reached for the door handle. "Remus, why is there no door here?"
"Wh-what do you mean?"
"This is a painting of a door. What happened to my house?"
Sirius laughed hesitantly. "Just a little joke Lily… Did we ever mention how much we LOVE that you clean up our messes?"
"Sirius Black WHAT have you done this time?"
"Oh… I need a drink…" James said walking to another door. "Remus, this is a painting too. Where's my house?"
"Wait a second! All the walls are paintings!"
"Erm… Well…"
James kicked one of the "walls" and they all came crashing down.
"SURPRISE!" Harry yelled happily.
"Remus… Sirius… What is this?!" Lily screeched as she looked into what was her house. It was now fire and people and parties and was that a goat?!
"Harry got rid of the elephant…" Remus tried to say as though it were a great thing.
"No! It was a tornado!! And then a tsunami hit!! And then a hurricane followed by an ice storm and concluded by global warming taking over and melting all the ice to create this disaster!!"
"Sirius… Black…" Lily said under her breath.
"Awh come on Lily, Remus was a part of it too!" Sirius tried to plead.
"Well, it's been nice chatting, I hope you have a lovely evening, bye!!" And the two boys apparated away.
Lily turned to James. "Never again."
The end.
With a possible sequel?
Review please!