Title: You Don't Know

Authors: Alexz Recoro

Summury: The title says it all. Oh all right! Umm, song fic, Mulder and Scully romance (is there any other kind?!), but mostly Mulder thoughts. That's it.

Authors Notes: Okay, listen. I want REVIEWS! Or e-mails at [email protected]. Especially if you want this to continue.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters. I just like messing with them. And please, do you really think I'm doing this for money? No! I'm doing this for my own amusment. Also, I don't own this song. It's 'You Don't Know' by 98 degrees. It's on the album Revelation. I was listening to it once when I was kinda sorta watching the old X-Files on FX. Enjoy!



Fox Mulder sat back in his chair, staring at the ceiling. He listened carefully for footsteps in the hallway outside. Hearing none, he sat back up, his feet hitting the floor with a thump that echoed through the small basement office. Mulder sat there silently for a few moments, listening carefully, straining every muscle in his body to make sure that Scully wasn't coming down the hallway towards their tiny offce.

*Who could know the emptimess inside
Every time I see your face
Too many feeling left behind
Do you wonder why*

Sure that Scully wasn't coming, and sure in the knowledge that he would hear her if she was coming, Mulder relaxed. Then he reached for his bottom desk drawer. He told Scully that it was locked, the key lost long ago. But that was a lie. In face, the key was around his neck, on a thin silver chain. He always had it tucked down in his shirt so that she couldn't see it. He didn't want her to ask questions that he didn't want to answer.

*I turn away when you look at me
Never wanting your eyes to see
This desperete heart that knows
How perfect we could be*

Mulder now pulled the chain off his neck and fitting the tiny key into the lock. He opened it and paused once again to listen for sounds from the corador. Nothing. Good. He reached inside the drawer and pulled out a gold picture frame. Anyone who looked at the picture would see a small women with bright blue eyes and dark red hair, a beauty certinally, but nothing terribly remarkable about her. Nothing that made her stick out in peoples minds. But one look at Mulder, and those thoughts would go unspoken. It was clear by the way he gazed at the picture that he was in love with the women in the picture.

*Baby cause you don't know, how I feel
Livin' my life without you
Baby and you don't know what it's like
Lovin' you all this time*

Mulder stroaked the face tenderly through the glass. He had been in love with Scully from that first mission. The way she always refused to belive what he was saying. The way she never complained about doing an autopsy for him, or finding a medical condition that he wanted to know about. How she never complained whenever he wanted to just jump on a plane to the middle of nowwhere to investigate some strange reports. He loved the way she looked when she was arguing with him, or that one time she had tried to scare him on the roof, saying that the door was locked. She had had him there for a moment, but he'd never admit that.

*I'll give you all my love, heart and soul
Riskin' it all on a chance
Now when I need you the most, you don't know*

Mulder sighed and put the picture back, setting it down tenderly on the strips of fabric that kept the glass from getting chipped or broken when he pounded the desk in fustration. He heard Scully's heels clicking down the hall, and shoved the drawer closed, locking it and tucking the key back into his dress shirt. She entered with her usually bright smile and chipper "Good morning Mulder."

*All I ever wanted in this world
Baby I found in you
I never felt this way before
But I can't break through*

"Morning Scully." He responed looking at his computer. "I got you some coffee."
"Thank you." Scully said, obverouly pleased. Mulder couldn't help but smile at her. Scully was everything to him. His doubter, his best friend, his partner, his backup, his confidate, and the love of his live. But she didn't know that last part. And left up to Mulder, she probably never would.

*And now I lie awake, alone at night
So afraid now to close my eyes
Just one more dream of you
I'll carry here inside*

Mulder sighed to himself. He could face down monsters and bad guys without blinking, and would chase an alien ship to the ends of the galaxy if possible, but he couldn't get up the nerve to tell Scully that he was in love with her. And right now, sitting there in a comfortable silence, in their office, it didn't seem to matter. But it did.

*Baby cause you don't know, how I feel
Livin' my life without you
Baby and you don't know what it's like
Lovin' you all this time*

As Mulder stared blankly at his computer, a thought came to him. If someone had, right at that moment, offered him the truth, the complete truth, and the only payment was that he could never see Scully again, he would turn them down flat. As Mulder rolled that idea around and around in his brain he realixed with a jolt that it was the truth. The only truth he needed at that moment in time.

*I'll give you all my love, heart and soul
Riskin' it all on a chance
Now when I need you the most, you don't know*

"Mulder? What's wrong?"
"Hmm?" Mulder looked up at the sound of his name, and saw Scully looking at him with careing on her face. "Oh, nothing. Just thinking."
"Okay." Scully said, not convened. "If you want to talk, I'm right here for you."
"I know." Mulder said, giving her a small smile. She went back to looking at her computer and Mulder studied her for a moment. "I know." He whispered.

*And I would hold you all through the night
I would stay right by your side
And I'd give you the world if your love was mine
But baby could it be I'm only dreamin'
Don't let it pass me by*

'I wish you were here for me.' Mulder thought despertly. 'I love you so much, but you don't know. You don't know how I every night I go to sleep, wishing you were there with me, in my arms. But that could never happen. I could never tell you. It would only put you in danger, like everyone who cares about me is.'

*Baby cause you don't know, how I feel
Livin' my life without you
Baby and you don't know what it's like
Lovin' you all this time
I'll give you all my love, heart and soul
Riskin' it all on a chance
Now when I need you the most, you don't know*