Hihi!! I know I haven't posted in a while '. I have a bunch of stories, but I never finish them, so they never get uploaded.

I don't usually write chapter stories, 'because I usually go back to the beginning and tweak things when they don't add up. And when I post them, I can't tweak :(

Each chapter is named after a song from a certain group. Anyone who can tell me what group wrote them gets a cookie!! And don't cheat. The cookies can smell cheaters...

Rated for language and subjects. I will have no lemons, only limes w I think...

On with the story! And I don't own Lucky Star. If I did, it would be kawaii yet kowai!

"You like that, don'tcha, bitch!" she snarled sadistically, the corners of her mouth twisting into a feral grin as she lashed the whip again. Her black and pink whore shoes dug into his naturally tanned back.

"Akira-sama… p-please don't…"

She sighed. "What's with you?" she whined in a low voice.

"I already told you! I'm not the masochistic type! And I'm not the type who goes around screwing every girl he sees!"

"You're gay?"

"No!! Ahhh, gomen, Akira-sama. My point is, I don't want to do this!"

"…Y-you're serious?" her voice lasped back into her actual voice, somewhere in between her false innocent screen voice and her deep monotone. "You really don't want me…?"

He couldn't help it. His heart began to melt. "A-akira, don't…"

"SO!?" she snapped, screaming at the top of her lungs with tears in her eyes. "WHICH ONE OF THE LITTLE BITCHES IS IT!? I BET IT'S THAT DAMNED TAKARA!! EVERYONE FUCKING LOVES GIRLS WITH GLASSES, DON'T THEY!?"

"Akira-sama, I don't know wha-"

"The only guy who doesn't want to fuck me is one who already has his eyes on another girl. So is it Takara-senpai, or are we gonna have to get busy with the whip?"

"I don't know those hard-"

SNAP!

Akira's handprint glowed so brightly on Minoru's face, one could probably see it if they turned the light off.

"It's Hi-" he muttered.

"Ehhhhh?? Speak up!"

"Hiiragi-san! Tsukasa Hiiragi-san!"

"Tsu-ka-sa?" Akira murmured, truly stunned. "You're in love with… that CHILD!?"

"Akira-sa-"

"Out."

"But… Akira-sama! This is my ro-"

"I SAID GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!!"

Minoru grabbed his shirt and jeans on the way out the door. As he shut it and started pulling his clothes on, he heard soft sobbing from inside the room.

'Akira-sama…' he thought, about to cry himself. Even though the middle-schooler continuously put him through grief like the world had never seen before, he still couldn't help but care deeply for her, like a murderous little sister. He couldn't stand seeing her like this. At one point, she had genuinely been the innocent girl she tried so hard now to portray. She had no reason to be the chain-smoking has-been who only gets her jobs through sex that she is now. All it took was one failed audition…

-Flashback-

"I… I didn't get the part…?" The 7-year old was stunned.

"I'm so sorry, Akira-chan…" her mother said. "The director explained to me that they were looking for someone a little… younger."

"No way!! I want to talk to the director myself!"

"But… Akira-chan! He's a very busy man-"

"So I'll make him make time!" The little girl stormed back in the direction of the auditorium.

Auditions for the part in the children's toothpaste commercial were already over. Akira burst through the doors with surprising strength (however, the doors were also surprisingly light…) for such a little girl. The director was the only one left in the room, packing papers into a cardboard box.

"Hey, you!" she yelled in her high-pitched voice. "Why didn't I get the part in the commercial!?"

"Ahhh… I'm sorry… Maiko-chan, was it?"

"Akira!! Kogami Akira!!"

"I'm sorry Akira-chan, but me and my colleagues simply believe you look a bit too… mature for the job."

Akira didn't have a comeback for that. So she did what all little kids do. She tried something she had seen in a movie.

She walked up to him determinedly, and grabbed him right between the legs, squeezing hard. "Can I have the part now…?"

The man grunted. But not exactly with pain…

"But that was supposed to hurt…"

"I'll tell you how you can get the job, Akira-kun." He grinned, undoing his belt buckle…

-End Flashback-

'Akira-sama… you really have to pull your life together…'

It should get better from here on out. Or at least I'll try! I WILL GANBATTE HARIKITTE!!

Next chapter should be up in a few minutes. Please give it a chance!

Paz out,
Rabid Shikime Uber Yaoi Fangirl Katon-chan