Disclaimer: THIS IS THE ONLY ONE YOU GET NOW LISTEN… ALL THE CHARACTERS ARE GOING TO BE OCC (out of character) BECAUSE ONE: I DON'T OWN THEM AND TWO: I DIDN'T MAKE THEM SO HOW COULD I EVEN KNOW HOW THEY WOULD REACT IF I PLACE THEM IN THE SITUATION I PLACED THEM IN THIS IS AND AU FYI OF SIXTH YEAR AND THE SUMMER OF FIFTH YEAR… DO NOT QUESTION ME!
I was given this
story by SaveMe so don't give me crap and telling me this isn't
mine I'm totally aware of that seeing as how SaveMe gave this story
them selves… so if you don't like it you can go and find some
thing else to read NO FLAMING
Summery: Something has happened over
the summer and has caused him to distant himself from the other 2/3's
of the golden trio. Draco is the only one who seems to notice some
thing wrong on the way to school and in turn calls on his godfather
to help. Can the two Slytherins get through to the distraught and
suicidal teen before the final battle…? Do they even want to?
Thank you my betaer: grimreaperprincess666
WARNINGS: MENTIONS OF RAPE, SUBSTANCE ABUSE (DRUGS ALCOHOL), CHILD ABUSE (OF ALL KINDS), LEMONNESS, SLASH, GAY SEX, CUTTING (AND OTHER FORMS OF SELF-MUTILATION), ATTEMPTED SUICIDE, POSSIBLE MPREG, AND POSSIBLE CHARACTER DEATH (I DO NOT KNOW WHO YET YOU PRAT!) IT WILL HAVE SOME DESCRIPTIVE PARTS IN ALL OF THESE IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT DON'T' READ IT
If you manage to
read this far thank you, I will only show this once ever other
chapter so it will be easer on me.
Kitty Thanks you
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Harry once again
woke up only to stumble on more reasons to cry than yesterday. So he
cried for hours and hours, this may have seemed dim-witted but they
were soundless tears. He had learned that if he was silent, if no one
noticed him, he would be left alone and not hurt again…for a while.
He could feel every bruise on his skin; he felt that all the cruel
words spoken were accurate; he felt his will to live drop away. He
also felt dirty, deceived, and vulnerable.
Many of you may be
wondering what on Earth could have broken the spirit of
The-Boy-Who-Lived, the boy that used to be so full of life, and the
boy that used to trust almost everyone unreservedly. Now he trusted
no one, now he wanted to die. The simple answer is, of course, his
Uncle. The complicated answer is too repulsive to write
down…yet.
After Harry had cried until he had no more tears left,
he got out of bed silently and walked to his desk, there he found his
knife. His gorgeous, devoted knife that was so sharp and teasing, it
offered release for all the pain he could feel, had ever felt. It was
his one invariable friend throughout all of his pain.
Harry walked
back over to his bed and slowly started the process of cutting one
wound into his right arm, he felt pleasure and a rush, like
everything was pouring out of that cut. When he was still able to
feel the emotions he wanted to rid himself of he started to cut all
up his arm, it still had not left him. He became impatient and
started to scream, he cut up his other arm, when that still didn't
work he cut ever inch of his body that wasn't already bruised or
bleeding, and then he stared to re-cut every wound he had ever had,
but one. Nothing was working; he screamed and screamed thinking
nothing about how his Uncle was going to react. It was not 'til
just before he slipped into unconscious that he realized that he
wasn't screaming at all.
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Draco Malfoy got
onto the Hogwarts Express desolately. Many may have thought that
Malfoy would be very contented to be going back to Hogwarts; it was
another year for him to ridicule people, another year to plan revenge
on Harry Potter, another year to be with his Slytherin friends and
bullies. However, no, that was not the case this year; this year was
diverse from the others. This year Draco was Lord Malfoy, this year
his Godfather Snape had enforced him to grow up, this year his mother
had died, this year he wanted to be alone more than ever
before.
Draco walked down the train carriages until he got to the
one at the end; he figured there he would have the most privacy. This
was not the case; as soon as he walked in, he found Harry Potter
squashed into the corner all alone.
"What are you doing in here
Potter?" Draco asked nicely enough, he did not even scoff. Harry
turned his head towards the speaker.
"You have pleasant
eyes."
"Thank you?"
Draco was very confused and even a
bit scared right now, this escalated when Harry just slumped back
into the seat, staring out of the window and did not say another
word.
"Harry...Harry…Harry are you alright?"
Draco moved
over to Harry and stood right in front of him, still Harry made no
reply. This cannot be good, this is not good,
Draco thought. He started to get nervous and began to rush around
the small compartment looking for…something, he did not know what.
He pulled down Harry's trunk and started to go through his stuff,
maybe he's been drugged he thought, but he couldn't find
anything incriminating there. He never slowed down until he picked up
a knife, Harry's knife.
"Ahh, there you are. I was scared
you'd left me but there you are, teasing me. Come here."
Draco
was getting freaked out and looked up just in time to see Harry
coming towards him with his hand held out for the knife. Draco,
though scared, had enough sense to hold the knife out of Harry's
reach and hold his other hand up to keep him from coming any closer
to the knife.
"Have you lost your mind?!" Draco almost
screamed.
"Come back, I need you knifey. I need to feel empty
again."
"Look I'm going to get you help ok? Stay here I'll
be right back. No, I'm taking the knife with me." Draco said to
the clearly insane Harry who sat back in the chair crestfallen and
started to cry.
"But I need it!"
Draco practically ran from
the room, he had no idea what was going on with Harry, he guessed
that he wanted the knife to do some kind of harm, but to himself or
to him Draco had no idea. If only he knew.
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Harry was there on
the seat crying, he could still feel all of the pain, why wouldn't
it leave him? Why hadn't Draco given him his knife? Why had he
taken his only means of release? Clearly, Harry wasn't thinking
that clearly now, he just wanted his knife and nothing else mattered
to him.
Harry was still crying when he felt someone coming close
to him. He pushed as far as he could back into the chair to get away
from them
"Harry I need you to stand up and hold my arm so that
I can help you." Harry didn't realize whom the man was that was
speaking. All he realized was that the man was wrong and that Draco
was back and he had his knife.
"You can't help me, only my
knife can help me now."
"No Harry that will only make you hurt
more. Come on Harry; please do as I've asked."
"NO!! I want
my knife, I want my knife. It hurts too much without my knife!!"
Harry was screaming now and jumped up, rushed over to Draco and
started to make a grab for his knife. Draco backed away from him with
eyes wide with terror.
"Help, help me, he's coming after me!"
Draco called out to the other man.
Harry didn't even hear the
spell they used to knock him out. All he saw was his knife and then
endless black. Though this might have been a forced sleep, it was the
best one Harry had in a long time. No dreams and no reservations that
his Uncle would come in at any second or be waiting there for him
when he woke up.
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Draco was relieved
to be sitting with his Godfather, Snape beside Harry's bed; this
was a lot better than having Harry trying to pull the knife out of
his hand like a maniac.
"This is even worse than I thought it
was." Severus said, pulling Draco out of his thoughts. He jerked
his head over to look at Snape, confused as to what he was talking
about.
"How is this worse?" Draco asked, clearly he had no
idea that Snape was referring to Harry.
"Well clearly the abuse
that Harry is suffering from at home is even worse than what any of
us thought it was if he's started to harm himself." Severus said
making Draco even more confused than before.
"He's being
abused at home?!"
"Where else do you think he got those
bruises, from falling down the stairs?" He said with a sneer.
"So
he's cutting himself?!" Draco asked with a look of horror on his
face.
"Yes, what else would he have meant by 'I want my knife,
I want my knife? It hurts too much without my knife'?"
Realization
finally dawned on Draco, and he didn't like it, in fact it down
right scared him. So was Snape, he had no idea what he was going to
do with Harry, clearly he needed therapy, clearly something terrible
had happened to Harry this summer and he intended to find out what it
was.
Neither of them had any idea of how bad it was, how bad it
could possibly be.