Eos

If thou be'est born to strange sights,
Things invisible to see,
Ride ten thousand days and nights,
Till age snow white hairs on thee,
Thou, when thou return'st, wilt tell me
All strange wonders that befell thee,
And swear
Nowhere
Lives a woman true, and fair.

"Song" (John Donne)

The King can send messages through to other worlds, and evidently he can send people as well. When Kairi clumsily asks if he can take her to the place she once lived, he points her to the secret place and grins, a little like Sora. "Why sure, little lady! Just hop on down with me and I'll take you. I can take your friends there, too, if you'd like."

"No... I think I'll go it alone for a bit. I don't know exactly what will happen, but I'm sure I'll be all right."

"Well, if you say so." Mickey holds a hand out expertly and a keyblade appears, just like that. "But only if you let me come with you, at least--I don't think you've learned how to open doors quite yet. And anyway I don't feel right, leaving people alone. Do you remember what happened when--"

The sudden abruptness of the (not-so) secret place may have cut him off, but Kairi senses another reason, too. He knows that they both once knew about something, but he may have cut himself off; so maybe he knows she can't remember as well. But how does Mickey know either of those things? Most importantly: How does he know she can't remember anything when she hasn't seen him since she was six?

"It'll only take a minute," the king assures her. "Here we go!"

...Yes, yes, she remembers--!

-break-

"D'aww," Mickey says, upon arrival to Hollow Bastion. "I was hoping they'd be finished with the place. But it's still as gloomy as before!"

"Gloomy," Kairi muses, looking at the castle's turrets and feeling a slight stir in her slow-beating heart. But just that; Hollow Bastion is still too... well, hollow to send much of anything through her already empty memories. Nothing besides the dull click that she has seen this castle before--or something like it--drawn onto the walls of the secret place. Only for that. Nothing from before she was six.

"Do you remember anything yet?" the king asks her.

"Unfortunately not, your Highness."

"Ah, just call me Mickey. Royalty to royalty, you know--even though that's not really why I--"

"Right, right! I guess I can just call you Mickey." Kairi laughs a little bit nervously. The empty roads and still-fading darkness in this humongous sprawling place are not something she enjoys much at all. She wants to go back home, to the place she feels safe in. Even if it is a little small...

"Hey there--hey!" A short, black-haired, star-wielding young woman greets them as they traverse the lowered drawbridge together. She waves from a window, yellow scarf flowing in the wind and shuriken glaring. "Are you new here?"

"Sort of!" Mickey calls back. "Just taking a tour of the place."

"Allow me, then!" The bright scarf girl vanishes into the castle for a moment and then comes trumping across the wooden planks to meet them in the middle. "My name is Yuffie Kisaragi, at your service. Who might you two be?"

"Mickey," the king answers.

"Kairi." She notices the lack of title.

"Kairi..." Yuffie smiles a little--it must be her thinking face as she tilts her head up to the faded blue sky, darkening into twilight very quickly. "That's weird; you look so much like a Kairi! Ah, the red hair... blue eyes... or maybe I'm being a weirdo. Well, come on--grand tour of the former Radiant Garden straight away! We're going to have loads of fun!"

-break-

There's not much to Hollow Bastion-Radiant Garden (Hollow Garden? Since it doesn't feel like radiant anything...) and the emptiness only makes it worse. Empty walls, empty halls--not a picture or person in sight as the three of them walk, walk, walk. But the library is different from the echoing corridors--once Yuffie opens the door the sound is swallowed up and two brown-haired people who could very well be brother and sister, if not twins, are sitting quietly. Researching... something that involves a lot of books and fragile parchments scattered around.

"Hello, Yuffie," says the older woman, cordially enough. But she is clearly engrossed in her reading and only registers Kairi and Mickey after a few moments. "Oh! And hello to you two as well! Ah..."

"Kairi," Kairi supplies helpfully.

"Mickey," the king supplies as well. His high-pitched voice is enough to make the other person lift his head a little.

"And I'm Aerith," the woman says. Kairi likes Aerith already; even while distracted and busy she's still nice enough to acknowledge complete strangers, while radiating some sort of soothing aura. And also she's wearing pink and white, which Kairi takes as a very good sense of style. The other person, who hasn't spoken or introduced himself or even acknowledged the presence of anyone else besides himself--he is someone who Kairi feels a bit wary about.

There is an unsheathed sword leaning on the arm of the couch, obviously ready for anything. Almost entirely black-clad and sharp, he can't help but look commanding; even with several books around him, stacked and closed neatly in small piles.

"Geez, Leon!" Yuffie hammers at him. "Social, much?"

"Sorry." But he's not looking at Yuffie, he's looking at the king and Kairi--revealing piercing gray-blue eyes and a long scar across his face. "I was busy." Kairi wonders where he got that scar. He didn't have it...

Before...

"Do you remember yet?" Micky whispers as Yuffie hovers around Aerith and Leon, bugging them with questions just like Sora does.

"Why are we being quiet?" Kairi whispers back.

"Because we're in a library."

She decides that makes the most sense even though she knows it's not the real reason. She knows she used to live in this world (back when it was Radiant), and she knows these people did, too... so why doesn't she remember?

"Oh, we're in a library! Right!" Yuffie's exclamation is swallowed in pointed glances and even a glare, from Leon.

"I think I'm going to stay here for a while," Kairi tells Mickey, no longer whispering. "I've never seen these books."

"I think you have," the king tells her, still quiet. Then, a little louder: "Well, if you don't mind, everyone--I'm going to explore some more."

"The tour!" Yuffie bounces back to Mickey's side and leads him through another door, way on the other side of the library. "This next room is a good one--it's the torture room!"

"Please, Yuffie, don't play on the rack!" Aerith calls. "It was hard enough getting you out last time when you--"

"All right, okay, no rack!" Yuffie yells, overpowering Aerith's concern. "I can crack so many jokes about that it isn't funny. So I won't."

"Gee, thanks a lot," the king tells her. Rapidly their voices fade away as Kairi pulls out a dusty hardcover and flicks to the table of contents. One Thousand and One Nights...

-break-

The clever queen has just started to tell her tale when it ends abruptly--not with the end of the story, but with Aerith excusing herself and following the path which Mickey and Yuffie took, to the torture chamber. "I just have a feeling that something is going very badly back there," she tells them. "I probably won't need any help, but if I do... well, I'll call you, Leon. Or maybe Cid. Depends on which door I'm closest to."

"I hope it's Cid," Leon replies evenly.

"I'll see you in a minute, Kairi," Aerith adds, as a courtesy. "I hope..."

Brow furrowed, Aerith leaves in a swish of petticoats and hair, Kairi notices, which didn't look so long from the front. When she casts a glance at Leon his hair is also quite long in the back, a veritable mane of brown hair (like Riku's?). That, along with the bangs, adds to the similarity in appearance; but their personalities are so markedly different that Kairi thinks twice about labeling them siblings.

"I know what you're thinking, and we're not." Kairi nearly drops the book as that is the first time Leon has spoken directly to her. But she recovers as he goes on indifferently, "We are neither twins, nor siblings, nor cousins, nor anything of the sort. We just look similar and tolerate each other for extended periods of time."

"Convergent evolution?" Kairi asks, the first thing that comes to mind. Like sharks and dolphins...

"Entirely."

Yes, and Leon would be the shark.

-break-

Sinbad is buried with his wife by the time Aerith comes pattering back into the library. "Leon! Have you seen Cid?"

Leon shakes his head. "Well, I'm right here so I might as well--"

"No, it kind of has to be Cid." An awkward pause. "I checked and he's not in his room--do you know where else he'd be?"

Leon checks the humongous brassy clock on the wall, all showy engravings and feathers. "Ah, four-thirty-seven... I'm guessing it's about time for Cid's cigarette break."

"Oh. Right. Well, I hope he's on the drawbridge like he usually is or else..." Aerith trails off. "I-I'll just go."

"See you, Aerith."

"Er, bye--" And off she goes.

Leon doesn't bother to look like he's trying to look like he's wondering what's going on. A dozen different scenarios would have flashed through Kairi's mind if she had known what exactly Cid was so good at doing that Aerith would have to go to him instead of just Leon. But nosy questioning can wait until later, after the presumed life-threatening situation is past.

For now, Kairi reads, and decides she hasn't seen this before. Not really...

-break-

"You can sit down, you know."

Kairi's ankles are aching but she can't seem to put the book down--so she memorizes the shelf and the books to the side of it before allowing herself to walk to the plain red couch Leon is sitting on, and sitting at the very opposite end of it. She likes propping her elbows on something while she reads, and she doesn't feel like moving all those fragile-looking parchments spread out on Aerith's couch. Although, now that she's sitting relatively close she can't continue stealing furtive glances at Leon without being incredibly conspicuous about it.

Something struck Kairi as familiar about Leon. It might have been the bangs, or the masculine silence, but she thinks that the deja-vu sensation she's getting is because of her friends. Leon definitely has Sora's hair color and something of Riku's personality--Kairi recognized his wry humor immediately after seeing it in action for years. But... there is something else. Something chilling her to the bone after being here for as long as she has; something that has nothing to do with either of her boys.

She thinks...

She remembers this place.

-break-

"How did you get here, by the way?" Leon asks, as if they've been talking for hours.

Someone less quiet than Riku would have been put off by the sudden start, but as it is Kairi looks up a little and shrugs. "Mickey brought me here."

"Hmm." The swordsman muses over that (like a shark muses over something alive in the water, kicking and struggling but delaying the frenzy by not bleeding). Something dangerously ambiguous is in his voice, either recognition or memory or suspicion--Kairi knows there is a reason for Mickey not introducing himself as king to these people and she is alarmed by Leon's silence. But then he says something else entirely: "Have you ever been here before?"

"Me?" Kairi fumbles and loses her page as she does. "Um... I don't remember ever being here, actually. But I..."

"Look at me." Kairi looks at him for a moment, and then averts her gaze. He always seems to be scrutinizing the things he sees, at the very least. Even the books he reads, as Kairi had already found out, are not safe from his stare. But gradually she looks up, and finds him simply peering at her with little of the steel she had noticed; only curiosity. "You don't remember being here, do you?"

"No..." She smiles nervously and brings her book down to her lap in order to have something to look at, though she is unwilling to turn completely away from him.

"Well, I'm sure there are other red-haired, blue-eyed girls lingering around this world."

"What?"

"I think I remember you," he states plainly.

"Well..." Kairi tries to find her page. "That isn't your fault. See, I honestly don't remember a thing from before I was six, and by then I was already on a different world. So, who knows what could have happened?"

"Oh?"

"Yes. And I'm really only here because Mickey thought it would be a good idea for me to see... what happened. To everything."

There is a question about to escape into the air, she can see that. Something along the lines of 'What exactly is Mickey's importance, that he knows these things and takes you from other worlds to here?' Which distresses Kairi because she would have to explain that Mickey is a king. But Leon forgoes that in favor of: "You are quieter now than you were."

"I am?" Kairi feels heartened by this and feels like asking more questions.

"Yes. But you also talk more easily. You could be that redheaded girl; the one who disappeared before everything happened; the one who never came back when things changed again. We looked for that girl back in Traverse Town--Aerith especially--before the years stretched out and we gave up. But I don't know if it's you. Like I said, there could be others."

Leon returns to his perusal of the books in front of him. They are clearly old books and expressly not for pleasure. Kairi does not feel as excited as before and instead averts her eyes to the book, feeling scrambled up and simply waiting for Mickey to come back. From wherever he is, whatever he's doing. Something that requires someone else to help Aerith get him out of trouble...

-break-

What feels like ages later: Mickey, Aerith, and Yuffie along with a fourth person (the Cid they've been talking about, Kairi presumes) open the door to the library looking messy and flustered and generally adventure-swept. Kairi stands up and the king gives her a sheepish smile. "Ha... I think we'd better get going now, Kairi. Sorry we couldn't stay longer, you guys!"

"No problem!" Yuffie answers. "Hanging out with you is a blast, Mick! I'd pick you over stuffy old Lionheart any day." There is a slight twist in Leon's forehead as a muscle brings up one straight eyebrow. Then the swordsman scoffs and returns to his book. So much like Riku... That Kairi is distracted a little when she and the King get back to Destiny Islands to find Riku sitting quietly, waiting for them.

"Hey there," Riku says calmly, with no trace of worry in his clear, clear eyes. "Something important happen?"

"Yes," Kairi says.

It doesn't feel important enough for a lie... and anyway Riku can take it. She is right in the second count, at least, because Riku nods and reaches one pale hand out to help her up the last few steps. But Kairi still feels a little bit guilty about something, and she wonders what sort of stain would remain on a Princess of Heart who has not lied. She tries not to think about the fact that she was counting on Riku not to ask for anything else; tries to ignore the sinking feeling in her chest as she walks upwards into the bright sunshine flanked by her best friend and a king.

She tries to ignore the fact that before she went back to Hollow Bastion, Riku was Riku and Sora was Sora. Now Kairi sees little bits of Leon whenever Riku reads quietly; flashes of Yuffie when Sora smiles. Kairi wonders...

If she grew her hair long enough and waited ten more years, would she fit into Aerith's shoes?

-break-

"I am sure that there are other redheaded girls who left and never came back."

That's what Leon had said, or something like it. And Kairi tries to ignore that, too, as best she can. But it's hard; Kairi has lost her memories twice and whenever she goes to sleep she has to try and keep things in her head for the longest time possible, repeating things over and over. She only has the present to abide by and she has developed an iron-clad grip on these days, so much that every detail of Hollow Bastion is etched into her mind and she can't stop thinking about Leon.

Perhaps that is what she's so guilty about: Her foundation (whatever foundation an amnesiac has) is slowly crumbling now, being replaced with new things. But what's worse is that Kairi will never forget this place, for as long as she is able. Unlike when she was six and arrived at the Destiny Islands in a shower of light, she will remember every brick as she chips it out of the ground, one by one. Selphie's cheerfully gravity-defiant hairstyle, Tidus and Wakka drilling each other in blitzball practice for the game, Riku and Sora themselves...

Kairi wants, suddenly and so fiercely it surprises herself, to not remember anything again, to start over like she did so long ago. Easy, right? Kairi steels herself under the covers and resolves not to remember anything about Hollow Bastion from this point forth--even if it goes against the grain of everything she's worked for these past years.

-break-

Kairi is dreaming, but not about emptiness or seagulls snatching ice cream from her cone this time. She dreams about wandering aimlessly through a castle which she knows is called Radiant Garden; and it is radiant, radiant. Tapestries on the hallways are flush with rich color and mark her passage through the halls as she ambles, picking things up and putting them down again. Or not. There are beautiful things on the walls, on stands next to doors--but still not a person in sight.

Then, suddenly, she is in the torture room, which she has never seen. There is not enough room in Kairi's waking life pockets to fit a fraction of the things Kairi keeps, but in the dream world anything goes. So when she hears precise, quick, muffled steps across a floor that hasn't been walked on in years (but it's still bright, the floors have been polished to a sheen), Kairi's hands are empty and she feels naked. Defenseless.

A young man is standing in the doorway, fierce and leather-clad like Leon. "You are not supposed to be here," he says sternly, sounding uncannily like Leon. But everything is wrong: This young man is stern, but Leon is not stern. (More like observant and cutting.) Young, a little past Kairi's age perhaps; but Leon is not young.

And he has no scar on his face like Leon.

"Leon?" Kairi asks uneasily, feeling for her thalassa shell charm in the midst of all the things she picked up and feeling nothing. She edges towards the open door.

He turns and looks around. "Leon?" (As he turns, she can see his hair is short in the back. Immaculate, even, though a different sort of perfect from Leon's.)

"Yes... Leon."

"That is not my name." Leon is not stiff like this person, either. "I should ask Ansem if civilians are allowed in here."

"No!" Kairi fumbles. "No, I'm leaving--see? Right now!"

"If I don't take you out, how will I know you won't come back?" Before she can protest at all, Not-Leon has her wrist in a very tight grip.

"But wait!" Confused, and a little annoyed (he is even ruder than Riku can be at his worst, and Riku can get plenty discourteous), Kairi attempts to pull away and explain herself. But no matter how much she pulls, he does not release her. A strange thing about the young man is that no matter how much Kairi struggles, it doesn't hurt either. She is just being pulled in a direction she does not want to go. "I'm lost!"

He stops pulling at last, though he still does not let go. "You are?"

"Yes; I don't know where I am. I have never been to that room before--I was trying to get to the library."

"Hmm." He turns completely and peers into her face. Leon or not, this person has the exact same gray-blue eyes and it distracts her. After scrutinizing Kairi intently for any signs of dishonesty, he releases her wrist at last. "Well, why didn't you say so? The library has moved from where it usually is; but I know where to go."

"Er..." This helpfulness is not familiar, either. Kairi knows Riku likes helping people out if they haven't irritated him recently. However, Riku uses contractions in his speech and he would not have held on so tightly. "Thank you."

"My name is Squall," the boy says. He opens the library door to a room full of bright light and fresh colors, and people. More people than she has ever seen in one place, being quieter than she could imagine. "Here is the library..."

Kairi notices the pause and fills in her name.

"Kairi?" Squall is surprised.

"What?"

He gestures, pointedly refraining from pointing, to a dot of red in the corner. "There is another Kairi here, but she is younger than you. I think it is odd that you would both have red hair." Kairi follows with her gaze, watching as the little Kairi giggles and bounces in glee, in response to something the old woman in the rocking chair tells her.

"Kairi..." she muses, feeling her name connect to the smaller person as well as herself.

"Do you know her?" Squall asks. "That is her grandmother in the chair, by the way."

"I..." Kairi squints a little. The little redheaded girl is cowed a bit by her grandmother's warning and her bounces from then on are rather subdued. Kairi shakes her head slightly and answers, "No. I don't know her."

She doesn't bother to get any closer.

-break-

Kairi wakes up and is immediately distracted by the light pouring into her eyes. She'd been so preoccupied last night that she'd forgotten to close her curtains and the broken day streams in unabated. Is it Monday? Tuesday? Perhaps it is Saturday after all, but she is torn between being busy at school and having the whole weekend at home to think about things, like these very strange feelings awakening in her. These very strange... dreams...

"L... Leon? Squall..."

"Hey, Kairi! Hey!"

But Kairi doesn't have time to think about this. She finishes tying her tie, grabs her bookcase, bids her father goodbye and is out the door to catch up with Selphie and be in time for school. She feels stiff and unwieldy; and she sorely wants time to think instead. But that's always the case with these things, Kairi thinks.

No matter what you choose you will always want the other, as long as you are unsure that it is right.

-break-

The King is not there when Kairi shakes the boys away with some sort of flimsy (valid) excuse and opens the door to the secret place. She hadn't expected him to be here anyway; but she does wonder how Mickey managed to open the door. He is a King, but he opened it using a keyblade, and Kairi just happens to have one all riddle with flowers across the handle, so there must be something she can do with it.

Something... like...

Kairi steps further down into the murky blue walls of the secret place and feels her keyblade appear. She wonders if Sora had to do this, or something like it during his year long absence from the Isles.

"Dear heart," something whispers to her. Kairi turns, but sees nothing and feels edgy with unused mental energy stirring into action. "Dear heart, you look just like a princess in that dress..."

Royalty to royalty.

Kairi takes a deep breath and stands up straight, smack in the middle of the cavern. Then on a hunch she looks up and points her keyblade to a single scratched star on the ceiling, something even Riku could never reach with height alone. She wonders why she never saw that before.

Well, we never thought to look up...

-break-

It feels strange, being alone at Hollow Bastion. All of it pointy tiers and dark towers, looming over Kairi's fingers like a leviathan's jaws. But she has been here before, at least once, and she makes her way to the drawbridge with no problem. There, however, she is surprised by Aerith waiting for her.

"Hello, Kairi," Aerith greets her kindly. "I thought you'd be coming back here; but, I didn't think you'd be alone."

"Mickey has... things he must do," Kairi falters, abruptly feeling like an idiot for bringing it up.

"Don't worry--I can tell you're looking for something. Come on in--I'll make some tea. Or lemonade, if you want to pretend that it's hot instead."

"Lemonade sounds fine."

Aerith smiles, friendly but a bit enigmatic as well. Kairi wonders why.

-break-

The table is as full as it will ever get. Leon, Yuffie, and Cid are waiting quietly in their seats as Aerith comes in, with Kairi following. "Hang on, I'll get the lemonade ready."

Leon blinks. Cid chokes on his cigarette and Yuffie looks downright alarmed.

"Whoa! Hang on there, little white mage, you said you'd give us tea!"

"I'm giving you tea!" Aerith assures Cid calmly, getting some lemons and starting to slice them expertly. "But Kairi said she wanted lemonade."

"Aerith!" Yuffie caterwauls. "It was a three-to-one victory! Tea, not lemonade! That goes for last-minute voters as well--it doesn't count, and we're all having tea!"

"Gosh, you all really like my tea..."

Leon stands up. "Aerith."

"Yes, Leon?"

"Give me that."

"Why?" The brunette seems genuinely puzzled. Kairi at this point has no idea what on earth is going on and she's just going with the flow. "I don't mind making just one more glass..."

"Let Leon make it!" Yuffie counters. "He is good! At doing things! Many things! Lemonade-making included--just sit yourself down, back away from the knives, and relax!" A humongous, nervous gasp of air, and then: "It's not like Leon can anyway!"

"Yuffie," Aerith reprimands softly; though she does sit down after a moment. Leon quietly slices the rest of the lemons in half as Kairi drags herself out of her confused stupor to actually make some small talk with the others. There is some sort of crisis, she reasons out fruitlessly, that has something to do with Aerith's ineptitude at lemonade-making; something so important Leon had to step up instead.

Yuffie is looking much less sickly-pale and Cid is smoking a cigarette in regular puffs by the time a glass is set down quietly in front of Kairi's hands (which are folded on top of the table). "Here," Leon says." He sits down and the knot of tension in the middle of his shoulders loosens bit by bit, as if to tell everyone silently:

Crisis averted.

-break-

Halfway through drinking their drinks and conversing quietly, Yuffie slams her cup down and clutches her torso. "Oh, ow--my stomach hurts! I... I think I'm going to throw up!" She clambers out of her sitting position as Cid stands quickly and, not quite faster than the eye can see, tips his teacup over.

"Hang on, Yuffie... I'll, uh, hold your head or something."

"...You what now?" Yuffie asks. Even Kairi is surprised at this flimsy excuse.

"Yeah, uh... moral support or some crap like that. Right? ...Right?"

Yuffie doesn't take it for a second. She points with one gloved hand and declares bluntly, "Cid doesn't like your tea!"

"What? Sure I do! I--" Cid fumbles for words as Aerith looks somewhat crushed at the revelation. "I just knocked my cup over in my attempt to assist Yuffie in her... Ack. Fuck. I'm getting it, aren't I?"

Aerith scowls as her green eyes well up. And she still manages to make it look pretty. "You sure are! Why didn't you just say something instead of knocking your cup over and pretending it was an accident? You hate helping Yuffie! A-and evidently you hate my tea as well--"

"Agh, it was a bad batch or something! Rotten leaves--it's not all the time I..." Cid sputters to a halt as Yuffie stealthily sneaks away and Aerith looks closer to tears than Kairi has ever seen anyone. The only blond in the room casts a vicious glance at Leon, sitting quietly. "You! Leon! Help me out here, why don't you?"

Leon's response is to calmly drain his cup of tea.

Cid turns and runs. "Yuffie!"

Aerith runs after him, furious. "Don't you dare run away from me--Cid! And don't hurt Yuffie, either!" Still unsure of what just happened, Kairi finishes her average-tasting lemonade and watches Leon out of the corner of her eye. He takes a napkin and wipes his mouth before convulsing suddenly and coughing.

"Uck."

Kairi looks up.

"I'm sorry you had to see that," Leon tells her.

She shrugs and swirls the half-melted ice cubes around in her lemonade, rounded edges making soft clinks in the midst of the drink. "It was kind of like watching my friends fight over things. They've been friends for a very long time."

"So have they." Leon gestures, pointedly not pointing to the door. Kairi sips quietly as the yells and sounds of running decrease, wondering if just outside the edge of her vision Leon is watching her intently and wondering if she is going to finish it. After the silence becomes good and unbearable she takes one final swallow and shoves it quickly into the middle of the table.

"I-it's good. You're good at doing things, like Yuffie said."

"Thank you."

"But I don't think I'm going to finish it. Too cold outside for that."

It sits, liquid sloshing to a halt as she avoids looking at Leon and shouldering the fierceness of that gaze. Then Leon reaches out with a creak of shifting leather and asks her, "Do you mind?"

She shakes her head quietly, and perhaps a bit nervously. "Not at all."

Leon takes the glass and downs it all at once. Kairi watches him and marvels: What a man. What a man. He doesn't even shiver as the ice cubes slide through.

-break-

Gradually Kairi gets the sense that her two best friends are getting further and further away, or a glass wall is coming between them; so one day she takes Riku over and asks, "Riku? If I tell you something important will you promise not to hate me?" Her silver-haired friend takes this moment to pause and think about his reaction. Then, as usual, he sets his face in a carelessly nonchalant expression and deadpans, "Fire away."

So she tells him. About hom--Hollow Bastion. She trembles as she speaks and her nerves are like trip-wires, but she tells him, and when all is said and done Riku stands quietly, adjusting his tie. They have not gone home yet, not even halfway there. Sora is still at school with blitzball practice, so Kairi can be alone with Riku for a while.

She falls into the trap of adjusting her tie as well when Riku doesn't say anything for a while. Then he sighs. "Let's get home, Kairi. We'll talk about it there." Kairi quietly shuffles into place a bit behind him and to the side. It never gets this quiet with Sora around, and she always wonders why.

"It looks like you're going on an adventure of your own, little bit." Riku ruffles her hair playfully, but Kairi does not miss the guarded tone behind the action. The hair ruffle is what Riku does with Sora, not her. They are still in uniform, in fact they are even still holding their book bags, so today feels decidedly formal. Something is not lining up.

Kairi sighs.

"I don't hate you, Kairi."

"What?"

"It's just a little hard," Riku elaborates. "I don't have any adventures of my own to distract me from missing you like when Sora was in the glass pod. Unless you count doing homework every day an adventure..." Riku is pulling mere above average grades right now, but before... he used to be stellar. "In a way, though, I'm sort of relieved. Now we can have balance."

"What do you mean, balance? You Zen master, you."

He smiles. "I thought it was weird. You, the girl, not having any adventures besides waiting... it's downright misogynistic."

"Oh... Right." The tension is broken apart. Only Riku can do this so... skillfully.

"I'm still going to miss you when you're gone."

He knows. Eyes suddenly brimming, Kairi throws her arms around his shoulders and holds. "I'm going to miss you, too."

"Eh..." He tries to make it seem like an afterthought, the way he allows his hands to rest at the small of her back. But the real reason is there, clear as day. He knows. Only Riku would know, and he can tell this entire world if he wants to because she wouldn't mind.

"Stay clean, Riku... Keep away from the darkness."

"And you--don't let anyone put you in a corner."

"I--I'm going to miss you...!"

"Yeah. I know."

-break-

Kairi runs home and changes clothes quickly. Gulps a glass of water to compensate for the extra energy she's spending; then she knocks on her father's bedroom door. "Dad?" The mayor, Tellah, pokes his head out from behind his book, looking as wise and venerable as ever with his pince-nez spectacles and white, white hair.

"Kairi! Are you going out, sweetheart?"

"Yes... For a while."

He shrugs. "Well, all right then! As long as you don't do drugs or have unprotected sex, we'll have nothing to talk about."

Kairi shifts a little in the doorway, nervous. Then she walks over and gives her father a hug. "Bye, Dad."

"Hmm?" He squints over his spectacles at her. "Now what's with the sudden affection? Did you do something bad and not tell me?"

"Just... Bye, Dad. I'll see you later."

"Very well! Go off, now--I'll see you too."

When she was six, Mayor Tellah had seemed like the most frighteningly intelligent person she'd ever come across in this small world. And... Kairi still feels that way. Only she has seen more than one world now. So. She holds on a little tighter before letting go at last.

-break-

"Sora!"

"Kairi!" Sora looks around, bewildered, his hair still semi-wet from blitzball practice yet spiky as ever. "I thought you'd be at Riku's house by now..."

Kairi is starting to feel compressed from all the goodbyes she's been giving. She will have to be quick from now on or she will never, ever work up the courage to leave this time. She runs across the last few sections of the block to give him a big hug, in compensation for the lack of explanation she'll give him. "Bye, Sora. See you." She then lets go, frantically feeling her way to the secret place, blinded by the rush of her own passing.

Sora is even more confused--she hears it in his voice, can practically see him looking hurt and reaching out a hand to stop her. "Wait--wait! Kairi! Where are you going?"

Home.

-break-

Defeated, Kairi slumps to her knees after getting to Hollow Bastion and stays that way, motionless in a great flat purple plain. It must have been gardens or something as the ground is very plain. It feels tended, faintly--if there had been grass or topiary hedges they would have been immaculately clipped. But all she sees is smooth dirt right now, with no footprints anywhere.

This is my adventure, she supposes, and doesn't feel like lifting a finger.

Boots crunch in the well-tended dirt after Kairi has remained still for a few moments. She looks up to see Leon, sword at the ready but still standing at ease, looking down with a hint of concern softening his eyes. "Are you all right?" he asks calmly.

"Yes..." Kairi nods and manages to lift herself up, brushing dirt away unconsciously. "I'm all right."

"Okay then." Leon reaches out with his free hand, the left, and turns her around as if to check for injuries. "You were very still and you had your weapon in hand... so I assumed you were hurt."

"It's just the way I get here." Kairi feels her keyblade vanish appropriately. Leon's silence as he starts walking to the entrance of Hollow Bastion makes her think that he noticed her honesty.

"You said Mickey brought you here." Bingo. Kairi nods. "Did you lie?"

Kairi thinks about it. "That was true the first time. But, I figured it out this time, and the last time. So I guess I don't need him to transport me here anymore."

"Why did you lie to Aerith?"

"I didn't want to look special. It's a key, which I use to open the door to this place. A big, ornamental, magical key which I just happen to have." She hopes that makes sense. And she also hopes... She hopes he doesn't hate her for avoiding the truth, like she did when she was here before.

-to be continued-