WARNINGS: L/Light shonen-ai, spoilers for up to Chapter 58/ Episode 25

#1- Clock

At first, he tries to keep track of the days by use of the clock on the wall of his cell, thinking that if only he knew how long he'd been imprisoned here, he'd be able to maintain control somehow; L must have sensed this strategy, because after eight days the clock is removed; it is a senseless move, and Light can't help but see it as yet another subtle means of insulting him: to withhold this information purely for the sake of seeing him powerless.

#2- Know

The texture of L's clothes, the layers of shadow beneath his eyes, the way his shoulders angle when he stands and sits, even the scent of his hair and the taste of his mouth, all these are things Light knows well- but it is not enough; he wants to slide into the detective's head, sit in his mind, dissect him slowly from the inside out, until all his mysteries lie open and tender on the floor around his feet.

#3- First

Their first kiss- if one can call it that at all- is a vicious struggle, heedless of breath, mindless of pace, bypassing thought and heading straight for lips and tongue and perhaps too much tooth; they fight at first, for territory, for possession, but in the end they both simply hold on tightly to whatever part of the other seems most accessible- arms, neck, shirtfront, hair- and ignore their better judgement for as long as they can.

#4- Tidy

L stops short as he catches sight of his desk: the bowls and plates, carnage from the late-night sugar session he had the previous day, are now stacked up neatly, the empty packets and wrappers have vanished, the teetering pyramid of sugar cubes has been dismantled and returned to its rightful home in the sugar bowl, and there is a note taped to the computer monitor that reads "Would Kira clear up your mess?"

#5- Cleanse

L glances across at Light yet again, drawn like a magnet to his brown-glass eyes, and for the first time ever he can almost see Kira, shining darkly in their depths; he looks away, shocked but not surprised, and makes a silent resolution to work even harder at cleansing the murderer from the face of the world, if only for the sake of seeing that frenzied spark vanish from the young man's eyes, and watching the cold fire be extinguished from his mind.

#6- Blood

There is a twitch, a slight gasp of pain, and Light stares as he sees the first trickle of blood swell at L's fingertip; the detective apologises later, securing a bandage over the cut, and explains that he was not being careful with the cake knife; Light nods numbly, wondering in silent horror just why the sight of L's blood, shockingly bright against his pale skin, would cause his breath to falter, and his heart to twist in his chest.

#7- Look

Perhaps he is just paranoid, but L is certain that Light has been watching him more intently than usual today: it is as if Light is simply incapable of looking anywhere else, much less concentrate on his work; it makes L nervous, as any unexplained change in Light's behaviour is liable to do, and it is only later- when Light's hands are in his hair and his lips are tracing a long line down the young man's throat- that L understands what that look means.

#8- Revenge

One day, when Light is tired- which always makes him volatile and petty- he decides that it would benefit everyone if L were to change his eating habits, and takes measures to hide whatever sweet foods he can lay his hands on; he comes to regret it later, when L takes his own unique form of revenge: kissing him, on the side of the mouth, in front of the whole task force; Light shrinks down into his chair under the collective stare of four shocked pairs of eyes, and makes a mental note not to interfere with L's lifestyle ever again.

#9- Change

It is inexplicable that being held bound in a cell for fifty days would cause such a profound change in Light Yagami, but all the same it is undoubtedly the case: his eyes appear brighter, his brow smoother, and his whole bearing has been transformed; L has no idea why the confinement would have such an unexpected side effect, but decides, after less than ten minutes with this new version of Light, that it is by no means a bad thing.

#10- Rebirth

There are countless words that can be applied to Light at the same time and in the same breath- rival, enemy, lover, friend- L is entranced and intrigued, repulsed yet unable to look away; he wants to leap upon Light, tear him down, pluck him from his pedestal and demolish him- and then rebuild him with his own hands, carefully, piece by piece.

#11- Attraction

Thinking about it, Light has to conclude that L is nowhere near as attractive as some of the girls he dated in the past, in conventional terms, at least: the detective is skinny and pale, with an appearance that screams of basic bodily needs long neglected, and a perpetually unreadable face: although he is by no means ugly, he rarely smiles, and it is almost impossible to hold his gaze for very long; despite this, he possesses a strange magnetism, some compelling aura, that makes Light want to try.

#12- Trust

L knows that Light is a brilliant actor: he himself has observed the processes turning inside the student's head as he works out exactly what behaviour is expected of him in his current role, and as a result, L is absolutely certain that no matter how convincing Light may appear, it is impossible to trust that image he projects; all the same, as Light smoothes his hands down the detective's chest and whispers low words in his ear, L can't help but hope that this, at least, is genuine.

#13- Sweet

L was not joking when he told the task force that he needs sugar to be able to think clearly, but it is clear from their sceptical, and in some cases downright accusatory expressions that they do not believe him; Light knows him better, knows that the story must be true, if only because of its sheer improbability, and as he holds another strawberry up to the older man's mouth, he murmurs under his breath that he once heard that sweet foods can become an addiction; L dips his head, snatches the fruit between his teeth, and agrees.

#14- Chain

By the third day, the handcuffs have been rendered almost redundant: Light is entirely convinced that L would be by his side constantly, observing his every move with that wide-eyed, mildly questioning gaze, even if they were not shackled to each other; the chain is just a symbol, a constant weight on his body and mind that will never vanish as long as he can feel L's presence beside him and his unblinking stare on his back.

#15- Human

Light remembers feeling strangely taken aback to discover that L actually has skin: at first, when he knew nothing except the single letter, the stark black and white insignia, and the scrambled voice challenging him to a death match, it was hard for him to see L as a person, and even now, although he knows that there is nothing supernatural about the man- that L is just as human as anyone else- it is difficult for him to connect the idea of the great detective, his arch-enemy L, with that face- and that skin- he knows so well.

#16- Plan

It is evident that L did not think this plan all the way through, Light reflects, resting his elbow on the towel rail to prevent his arm from becoming numb; the chain- stretched to its limit now- extends away from his wrist, over the rim of the bath and up again, out of sight; a slim, bare arm reaches out from behind the shower curtain and feels around for a towel, and Light scowls in annoyance- right up until L emerges, towel around his hips and dripping onto the tiled floor; Light looks at him, then at the shower, then back again, and it is only now that he realises just how meticulously this scheme has been planned.

#17- Rain

It is cold on the roof, and the rain drenches him in an instant, soaking through his hair and making his clothes cling like a second skin; he makes no attempt to shield himself from the weather, and as he walks out into the storm L watches him, a trace of that strange smile hovering over his lips; out here they are totally exposed, totally alone, and if they shiver, they make no mention of it.

#18- Friend

There is a moment of complete silence as Light, along with the rest of the team, turn to stare at L; he is facing away from them, but his movements display no signs of embarrassment at revealing such a personal piece of information, and eventually Light feels compelled to make some sort of reply; later, he wonders just what the remark meant, what the reasoning behind saying such a thing could possibly have been, because surely there is no way, absolutely no way, that L would really see him as a friend.

#19- Attack

Light is on his feet, fists at the ready, and it would be the easiest thing in the world to knock him down with a well-timed kick- but just this once, L decides that it would be pointless to fight; Light tenses as the older man approaches purposefully across the carpet, but before he can swing a punch, L closes the last distance between them and slides his hands up under the teen's shirt; all the aggression drains from Light's body in an instant, and he stares in shock as L's fingers run gently along his stomach and sides; seeing the look on Light's face, L nods to himself in quiet satisfaction, deciding that surprise tactics are, after all, the most effective.

#20- Respect

As soon as Light tastes the drink, he realises his mistake: the tea is so sweet that he can almost feel the cavities forming as the sugar begins its malicious work on his teeth, and as he tilts the cup from side to side in an appalled sort of fascination, he sees that there is a thick layer of viscous syrup at the bottom, where the sugar has refused to dissolve; his disgust is evident in his eyes as he slides the cup along the desk, but L does not seem offended, saying mildly that he usually eats that part with a spoon; from then on, Light treats the detective with a renewed respect, along with a new-found, wary admiration.

#21- Kiss

Light can't sleep; he stares at the ceiling replaying the day's events in his head, and still he does not understand: he had no reason to let L kiss him again, and although the detective is undoubtedly stronger than he looks, Light is certain that he would have been able to force the older man to stop, had he tried; but he did nothing- even, if he is honest with himself, wrapping his arms around L's shoulders and kissing him back just as fiercely; Light groans and buries his face in his pillow at the memory, and Ryuk's dark, steady chuckling does nothing to help his mood.

#22- Attention

Mobile phone in hand, computer on the desk in front of him, and a plate of cake balanced on his knees, L is hard pressed to give each object the attention it demands; glancing over to confirm that the older man is still staring blankly at the same area of ceiling which he has been regarding for the last forty minutes, Light realises that the effort required to divide his mind between the three tasks has left L with very little room in his brain for much else; although it does not make sense, Light has to fight the urge to march over and pin L to his chair with a long kiss, simply to earn the questionable privilege of having L's thoughts- and his intent gaze- fixed solely on him.

#23- Sleep

Light is engrossed in his work, his fingers tapping out dance-like rhythms on the keyboard, and it takes him a long time to realise that L's chin has descended to rest on his knees, and that he has not stirred from this foetal position for a long time; taking care not to make too much noise with the chain attached to his wrist, Light stands and moves across to peer at L in confusion- and then almost falls over in shock when he realises that of all things, the detective is asleep; he has never seen the detective's eyes close before, and quite apart from the rarity of such an event, he is stunned by how different L's face looks: as if he has nothing to hide, as if he is truly at peace.

#24- Danger

It is a unique sensation, a mixture of fear and excitement: to have Light, the one person whom he trusts the least, standing so close, to feel the heat of his skin and gentle scrape of his teeth; Light's hands, the hands which could kill him so easily, are like vices on his upper arms, and as Light knots his fingers into the loose fabric of the detective's shirt, L moves closer, rendering the young man immobile with a combination of forceful energy and lingering kisses; it is breathtaking: sensual, intimate, and so very, very dangerous.

#25- Death

Light kneels beside him, holding his upper body off the floor, and gazing up, L can see the red emergency lamps pulsating nauseatingly on the ceiling over his head, the empty screen of the dead computer casting grey shadows around the room; his fingers tighten on Light's shoulder as he watches the student's face settle into the image of Kira; he hears screams, but the world is retreating, dissolving in crimson checkerboard shapes until all that remains is that smile, those eyes, and the arms like ropes around his chest.