A.N. This is Pinky to all who don't know. . . back again, with another lovely fic! Only... tis no drama. . . in fact, it mocks drama in this. . . heh heh, tis a humor story! And Joon's in it again. . . and. . . yeah. This takes place the summer after 'Emotion Sickness'. . . JUST READ IT! . . .and you will. . . have read it. . . and then you can ignore me trying to tell you what's coming up in the chapter. . .
The First Chapter of Doom-
Lurving and Mooshing
"Oh Joon! Come out and face me!"
Joon is terrified. He locks the door as quickly and as quietly as he can, then rushes across the room and types into the computer, connecting a transmission to Earth.
Tak's face fills the screen.
"Who is it?" she demands harshly, but then upon recognizing the caller, smiles. "Oh, hey Joon! What was up with your last transmission? You suddenly cut it off and-"
"An interference," Joon says hastily, casting a quick glance to the door. He takes in a short breath, then turns back to Tak, "So, how ya been, kid?"
"Haven't really changed in the past hour since you called," Tak says.
"Heh. Yeah well. . ."
"I'm fine, Joon. You don't look so great though. . ."
"Fine, fine. . ." he seems distracted, but then says quickly, as if to change the subject, "So, you and Zim tie the knot yet?"
"Geez!" Tak's eyes are a little bugged out. "Why do you always ask that!"
"Well, I'm just curious, Tak. . . "
"Don't be!" Tak snaps. "Why would Zim and I 'tie-the-knot'? We're barely even a couple."
"Aw, but you lurve him, don't'cha?"
Joon grins innocently, as he watches his childhood friend spaz on the screen.
"First of all," she shouts, "What the hell is 'lurve'! Second, assuming you meant 'love', my answer is 'absolutely not'! I don't even think Irkens are capable of love. So there."
Joon coughs sharply, and he makes out a voice coming from the other side of the door, saying, "Joony Baby, are you in there?"
Joon twitches slightly, but tries his hardest to ignore the voice.
"Oh, cut the crap," he says to Tak, "Irken are capable of love and you know it."
"Yeah, well. . ."
"C'mon. Admit that you lurve him."
"I do not lurve anyone, Joon."
"Fine, admit to liking him."
Tak sighs.
"You see," she says, exasperated, "You always get into this. . . it's irritating. . ."
"Admit it."
"'Liking' and 'lurving' are two entirely different things. . ."
"Tak. . ."
"Fine, Joon, I-"
The door blasts open, and flies straight into the computer screen, breaking it instantly and cutting off the transmission. Joon stares in a mix of terror and dismay, as he looks to where the door once was, and sees. . . well, someone he'd rather not.
It's been two weeks since skool ended.
When Zim first discovered that his grade was the graduating class of the skool, he couldn't have been happier; that is, until he realized that the upcoming September he'd have to attend Jr. Hi Skool. Which was right across the street from skool, but he had never really noticed it before that. Oh well.
And now it's hot. Even in the base, and Zim is sticky with sweat, which he thinks feel kinda gross. The heat's sort of dulled his mind, so he's just sitting on the couch with Gir, staring at the television screen.
"What're you doing?"
It's Tak. She's talking from the kitchen.
Zim mutters, "Watchin' TV..."
"Oh," says Tak. As she searches the cabinets for foodm she continues, "Ya know, I was talking to Joon before. . ."
"Hehm."
". . . only the transmission got cut off again," Tak says, not really caring whether Zim's listening or not, "but before that he was acting a little funny. Kinda distracted. My guess is, he screwed around on the Massive, and now he's in trouble. . ."
"Uh-huh."
Tak enters the living room, holding a soda, takes a sip, then says, "Zim, you know the TV isn't even on. . ."
Zim blinks.
"Oh," he says. He sits up, grabs the remote, and turns on the television.
"Hey! I was watching that!" Gir protests.
Zim slumps back on the couch. Gir shrugs and stares blankly at the screen.
Tak sighs, disgusted.
"This is pathetic," she says, "You haven't done a thing since skool let out. It's annoying. Don't you miss terrorizing Dib?"
Zim grunts in response, so Tak shuts off the TV.
"Hey!" Zim and Gir shout in unison, "I was watching that!"
Tak yanks Zim off the couch by the arm and pushes him toward the door.
"Get out," she says.
"What?"
Get out, remind yourself how much you hate Earth, come back and think of ways to destroy it."
"But-"
"GO."
She closes the door in Zim's face, and smirks to herself.
"It's about time he got out, instead of just watching TV all day," she mutters. She pauses and looks back to Gir, who just turned back on the television. "Hey. . . what're you watching?"
"Stupid Tak," Zim mutters under his breath. It's later. "It's not even her house. . .she can't kick me out. . . I WON'T STAND FOR IT!"
Although there's really nothing he can do about it. And while Tak does irritate him when it comes to her pushing him around, Zim decides to do what she says (although he convinces himself he was planning to do it anyway).
He tries to think of the one place he detests the most. . . well, anyplace with Dib, he guesses, but with the heat and all, Zim is not in the mood to start up with him. Because that usually requires excessive yelling, and usually ends in an epic chase, and he is just too tires.
Next place in mind. . .Bloaty's Pizza Hog.
Zim shudders slightly at the thought. But decides to go there anyway, because if he's going to hate Earth, it has to start somewhere.
It doesn't take him long to reach Bloaty's. A huge banner is hung outside, labeled 'Dress-up-like-a-different-species-week'. Zim enters, and all the humans inside are dressed up as various farm animals or woodland creatures, although there are a feww hippos, and even a panda.
He stands for a few moment in horror, then decides that's enough for one day, and turns to leave. Unfortunately for him, he is stopped by a rather large squirrel.
"Hello small child," says the squirrel monster, "This week is 'Dress-up-like-a-different-species-week' at Bloaty's! If you're dressed up as anything other then a human, you get a free pizza!"
"Away with you, fur beast!" Zim shouts, waving his arm around wildly, to scare off the Squirrel Human.
He fails.
The squirrel smiles disturbingly, and Zim is about to run, when suddenly he is tackled to the ground. And not even by the squirrel.
"Zim! I finally found you!" says the thing on top of him. It's hugging Zim rather tightly on the ground, and he can't really escape, seeing as it is mooshing its body against his. It feel really weird to him, and for the quickest second, he thinks the thing is Tak, because he's just realized that it's a female. And Irken.
But then, the Irken doesn't look like Tak at all, and Zim can't seem to remember ever seeing this female before.
Besides, Zim thinks quickly, Tak would never squish against me like this, at least not on purpose. She has more. . . dignity.
(Although his heart, or whatever emotionally-connected organ an Irken has, sinks at that thought.)
"Get off of me," Zim groans, and the female looks at him with shiny eyes.
"Oh, my sweet Zim!" she exclaims, and tightens her hold on him, "Aren't you happy to see me?"
Zim just says in desperation, "Who are you?"
"Zim. . ." the female sits up (though she doesn't get off of him), and looks crushed. A weird hiccup escapes her, and she says, "It's me...Pleecy!"
End of Chapter 1. . .
Gasp! Who is she? No one knows. . . but me. . . yeah, um. . . just so ya know, Pleecy is. . . annoying. She's meant to be. She's hyperactive. And deeply inspired by one of my friends. Well, you'll get more on her next chapter. . . (next chapter is 'Heads in the Freezy Box'!), where there'll be:
-a rushed explanation
-a surprising revelation
-melted ice
I bet you all can't wait!
Random Crap:
Last week, I had a dream I was talking to Jhonen Vasquez on the phone, only I kept calling him 'Mr.Vasquez', and he made fun of me. I was sad.
Review my dearies! (advances on all of you)