This is my attempt at a comic version of Knights of the OldRepublic: The Sith Lords. I'll do more if there is an interest so let me know!

Disclaimer: I can claim no ownership of any of the Star Wars universe and their games.

Prologue: The Ever Hunk

The space worn freighter, Ever Hunk, has seen better days and a better looking crew. Its engines offline and the starboard hull half blown away; it is adrift in a dangerous asteroid field and things couldn't seem more pathetic.

Suddenly a lone astromech, T4-U2, sputters to life in the cockpit. He realizes that there is no pilot and his droid tea warmer arm explodes in fear, damaging his top unit and making it tilt clumsily to the side. The situation is even more dire as he realizes the ship is floating among an asteroid field. Rolling to the nearby galaxy map, T4-U2 notices that the nearest place to dock for repairs would be the Perilous Mining Facility. But how to get there?

T4-U2 scans his memory core. He believes that at one time he was more than just a tea server. At one time he actually used to fix things. Ah ha! Yes, T4-U2 has found the almost obscure data.

Rolling down the hall, he can't seem to get the door to the main tea room open. Making for the kitchen off to the left he finds the communications console and rams into it until the lounge music begins to play over the com system throughout the ship. T4-U2 tries banging on it again until the door to the main tea room finally opens.

Staggering through the door he notices a dead old hag lying on the floor. Apparently she must have fallen off her chair when they were attacked. Her teacup is still clutched in her boney hand and the front of her drab brown robes are still wet. A small metal flap opens on T4-U2 and a napkin on a metal arm extends out, dabbing at the foam on the old woman's chin. It's then that he notices a locker key sticking out of her pocket. The resourceful droid decides that she certainly doesn't need whatever she was stashing in that locker anymore and lifts the key.

"Statement: I am unable to open the door," said a voice from behind T4-U2. Loud banging could be heard from the pantry door. The curious astromech droid tries to open the pantry door but an annoying computer voice tells him that it is impossible.

"Deet reet doo bop doo bop!" says T4-U2 to the trapped occupant in the pantry.

"Exclaimation: Blast you!" comes the answer from the pantry. "Veiled Threat: When I get out of here I'll see that you never work a floating tea room again!"

"Bee boo deet ree!" answered T4-U2.

"Smart Ass Answer: Up yours too!" answered the voice from the pantry.

T4-U2 rolls away from the pantry door and scavenges for any spare parts he could find. When he passes by the security terminal he stops to check out the damage on the cameras. He notices that half the garage is missing and there is a man lying in the med bay. His need to serve is strong and he rolls south to the med bay to check out the injured man.

"Bee bop bee bop," T4-U2 signals. He shudders in surprise when the man's hand shoots out and grabs his metal arm.

"Med… pac!" the man manages to rasp out before he falls back into unconsciousness. T4-U2 has 0 treat injury points and has no idea what the human asked for. The only type of 'pac' he knows of is an ice-pack. Yes! That must be it. He rolls back to the kitchen and fetches an ice pack from the ice box. Rolling back to the man, he places it over his forehead and decides to continue his scavenging.

He rolls to the engine room, but the annoying computerized woman's voice yells at him once more and tells him that he'll need a mine to open this door.

"Bee root deet ree!" he yells back.

The voice responds back saying, "Watch your language or I'll start the self destruct sequence of the Ever Hunk."

T4-U2 continues his searching and comes upon another astromech droid, FU-2U, broken in the cargo hold. The lazy bastard, thought T4-U2, leaving me to do all the work around here. Pulling up his droid sock arm he punches FU-2U on his top unit and watches as the droid sputters to life.

After much rude beeping at each other, the two droids raid the cargo hold for all parts. They open the locker with the old woman's key only to find that the hag had stolen a large supply of their tea bags. The tea fell to the floor and T4-U2 let out a string of curses aimed at the dead old woman.

The annoying computerized woman's voice came over the com system and said, "I heard that! I will now start the automatic self destruct system of the Ever Hunk. The Ever Hunk will self destruct in T-minus 30 minutes."

"Deet boo reet dee," said T4-U2.

"What was that?" said the annoying voice. "There is no primary power?"

"Bee reet!" came the mocking answer.

"Then I will resume the countdown when you have restored primary power," the voice concluded. "I cannot destroy the ship without power."

"Tee hee tee hee," the two little droids laughed.

Finding a blaster in one of the containers, T4-U2 sends FU-2U around to blast any com speakers inside the ship. Meanwhile T4-U2 takes the lift to the outer hull and rips more parts from the torn ship. He also finds the mines that he needs to blast the engine room door.

T4-U2 takes the lift down to find FU-2U pointing the blaster pistol at the unconscious man in the med bay.

"BEE REET!" screams T4-U2, stopping the level one droid from his folly.

"Ree too bee?" FU-2U asks.

"Beep ree deep dee," answers T4-U2 and hands FU-2U a mine, pushing him towards the engine room door. FU-2U rolls to the door and stands there in confusion until BANG! The idiot droid blows to bits along with the door to the engine room. Better him than me, thinks T4-U2 as he rolls in to fix the hyperdrive and restore primary power.

He scans his memory core for how to do this and tries to rig something up. POW! Ooops, I've blown the starboard engine. He tries again and this time finds success with the port engine as it hums to life again.

As he rolls back to the galaxy map in the cockpit he realizes that he still needed FU-2U if he wanted to explore the garage. Oh well, screw the garage, thinks T4-U2, I just want to get to the Perilous Mining Station. Perhaps they are in need of a tea serving droid, he hopes.

He hears the muffled voice coming from the shot up com speakers as the annoying woman's voice tries to speak again.

"Tee hee, tee hee," laughes T4-U2 as he presses the travel button set for the Perilous Mining Station.

Miraculously the ship maneuvers itself through the asteroid field and into the landing dock of the Perilous Mining Station. When they land T4-U2 hears the sound of a door opening and flames crackling.

"Beep?" he calls out. He shivers as the clanking sound of metal feet approach the cockpit and a dreaded voice says:

"Statement: Foul mouthed tea cozies must be punished."

T4-U2 felt his systems shut down as the HK assassin droid fired his ion blaster, knocking his spare teapot across the room.

Phew! It's hard to write comedy when your characters are droids! I hope it was o.k. I'll continue with the Exile at the Perilous Mining Station next if there is enough interest. Please review and let me know!