"I did the same thing you would have done."

"I don't want you to be me! That's my job! Your job is to be you!"

She hadn't said a word since he began to yell at her. Her whole body had become tense, but she had forced her eyes to keep focused straight ahead. She only looked up when her sergeant's next words came out.

"Hailey, I'm starting to wonder if you can do it."

She had managed to keep her tears at bay, even though they threatened to fall the whole time she was in his office. He had left her with the slightly ominous words that her flight leaves tomorrow.

Tomorrow. She held the word in her mouth, like if she could somehow separate it from its meaning it wouldn't be real. Then by consequence, neither would her flight to New York City to work with the FBI task force.

But she knew life didn't work like that. Especially not hers. It never had. She was always dealt the worst hand, or the wrong side of the proverbial coin. Maybe she shouldn't be surprised she ended up here, with this punishment.

Because that's what it was, right? Forget Voight's notion that the FBI does "things differently" and that "the lines are real clear." She knew what it was: a way for him to ship her off until she came back to her senses.

Maybe he had good intentions, or the right idea, but why did she feel like the very thing that was supposed to bring her back into herself was going to make her feel more disconnected than ever?

With the time she had left – barely 12 hours until her 8AM flight – she knew she had a few things to take care of. Two were people, one of which she knew she had to talk to in person. At least, that would be the ideal way to handle it. She checked her watch: 10:28PM. Shit.

She knew Jay had already gone home for the night, and she didn't know if he would want her showing up on his doorstep unannounced. She carefully grabbed her phone before she felt a tremor in her hand. She knew if she opened up to him that everything would come spilling out. The good, the bad, and the ugly. And she wasn't strong enough to handle it right now. So, as much as it pained her, at least she knew she could suffer through more pain and survive. That's what she had been doing all damn day. What was one more?

With that in her mind, she turned her phone off, and headed home. She needed to pack. She needed to do a lot more than that, she knew. But, she brushed it off. She was getting good at pushing nagging feelings down until she couldn't feel them anymore.

Jay hadn't gone to sleep yet. He couldn't. He had downed a couple whiskeys, and typed and retyped the same message to his partner about 10 times. He knew he should call her, to make sure she was alright. But, he knew if it was anything like the last time he had surprised her, she wasn't too happy with him about it.

Course, she had opened up to him a couple weeks ago about her parents. He knew how difficult that was for her. He was glad she trusted him enough to share that darker part of her life. But, he couldn't help but feel like she was still holding back. Not just in the negativities either. But, with a lot of her feelings.

He had hoped that she was going to confess one such feeling at the hospital all those months ago, but it hadn't happened. Nothing really had since then. Well, nothing near as significant in Jay's mind anyway.

He had wanted to stay behind at the station and wait for her, but he knew better. She could handle herself. Her words from a while back echoed in his head: I'm okay, Jay. Go home, okay? So, with those words in his head, that's exactly what he did.

When he had arrived home, he had gotten the alcohol and hoped it would make it easier to check up on her. It didn't. And yet, he kept drinking. He was on his third when he let out a long sigh, wondering what in the world he was doing. Drowning his sorrows in booze. Great coping, dude.

He ran a hand through his hair, wondering if he should just pick up the damn phone and call her. He really did just want to make sure she was okay. And you wanna hear her voice if you can't see her, his mind reminded him. He pushed the thought away, hoping it would stay away so he could eventually go to sleep. But first, the phone.

He tossed it around in his hands, almost wishing the numbers would dial themselves. He groaned in frustration, wondering when he and his partner became so awkward, and very unlike themselves. They were usually at ease with one another, not walking on eggshells. But a lot had changed since that one day at the hospital. Every so often, he caught glimpses of who they used to be…who she used to be.

Like when he had to pay $30 for those damn red roses at the floral shop. And Hailey's bright smile in his peripherals made it all worth it. Or when she said that she told him "we're good together," and he had held onto that longer than he'd ever admit.

Because deep down, he knew they were. And she knew it too. He knew she did, or else she wouldn't have asked Voight to make the switch back. So, then why did he feel like there was something in their way again?

He was brought out of his thoughts by a text message. He couldn't help the smile that came across his face at the thought of it being from Hailey. It faded just as fast when he saw who the sender really was. And was replaced with confusion at the nature of the message. Well, he definitely didn't see that coming.

"Vanessa? Are you here?"

Hailey had called out when she stepped inside, praying her roommate would be home. She really needed to get this conversation out in the open…and over with.

"Yeah, what's up?" She heard Vanessa's reply from the kitchen, where she was more than likely making a late-night snack. The girl was fit, and yet had the appetite of a teenager. Hailey couldn't help but chuckle at her predictiveness.

"I need to talk to you about something," she began, shrugging out of her coat and shoes. She sat down on the sofa, and Vanessa followed suit.

"What is it?"

"I'm going to New York."

"What? When? For what? How long?"

"Woah, woah, woah, slow down," Hailey said, stopping Rojas' bevy of questions. "It's not by choice. Voight's sending me on loan to the NYC FBI task force. Special assignment for a couple weeks. My flight leaves tomorrow." She didn't look up from her feet as she spoke, as she feared Vanessa's reaction.

"Oh, wow. I didn't know it would be so soon. But, I'm happy for you Hailey, I really am. I just hope it's not because of this case or what happened earlier with Voight and me. Is it?"

"No," she honestly replied. "It's not that, I promise. It's all me. He uh, he thinks I need some new training ground, I guess."

"And he thinks you need the Big Apple for that?"

"Apparently." She shrugged her shoulders, trying to feign nonchalance. "So, listen, I'm sorry I like, sprang all of this on you. I just obviously needed to let you know since we're living together and everything. Plus, I don't want you getting into any trouble…and you've gotta keep Jay out of trouble for me, okay?!" She chuckled at that last part, before she realized what she had said. It had spilled out all too easily. At things regarding him usually did. Dammit. Nice going, Hailey.

"Speaking of," Vanessa attempted to segway. "Have you told him about this impromptu NYC trip? I mean, he is your partner, after all," she bit her lip, and Hailey knew she wanted to say something else.

"Out with it," she demanded.

"Oh come on, Hailey. Do I really need to spell it out for you again?"

"Yeah, you do." She sassed back, standing up as she decided to get a head start on her packing.

Vanessa followed her down the short hall to her room. "Hailey, wait a second. Please."

"Yeah?" She didn't turn around to face her roommate, instead grabbing her suitcase from the top of her closet.

"Hailey, look, as I've gotten to know you…and Jay…over these last few months, I know how similar you both are. I know you both play things pretty close to the vest, and I know you guys only really open up with each other. Which is why I'm thinking you need to talk to him about this."

"I–" Hailey willed her voice not to break. "I appreciate the thought, Vanessa, I do. But, I can't. I've gone through a lot these last few weeks, and Jay knows that. He knows I'll reach out soon. I just can't right now."

"But why–" Vanessa began, but Hailey's sharper tone caught her off guard.

"Please, Vanessa. Just leave it alone."

"Okay," she said quietly, before turning on her heels to leave Hailey alone to pack.

She pulled out her phone from her pocket, typing in the one number she knew would know what to do.

Jay stared at the text message for an insanely long time. Why the hell was Vanessa texting him? It just didn't make any sense. Maybe his alcohol-infused brain couldn't put two and two together. Who knew, but either way, he was confused.

Jay, I need to tell you something. It's about Hailey. But, I don't know if she'd really want me to.

He didn't know what to do with that information. What in the world could Hailey not want to tell him? They told each other everything…or at least, he thought. His mind went back to that nagging feeling he had moments earlier though. He knew she was different, or at least, had been acting different. He just didn't know why.

He knew the case with Vanessa had thrown her for a loop. Hell, it had thrown all of them for a bit of one. But Hailey especially, as she wanted to protect Vanessa as best she could. Jay knew that, and he was proud of her for that. He knew her heart was in the right place. It always was.

What is it? He typed back, not wanting his mind to think the worst.

Voight's sending her to New York. For two weeks. She leaves tomorrow.

He stared at the message across his phone screen, the letters becoming jumbled in his vision. New York? Was this a joke? He'd already lost one partner to the Feds, he wasn't going to lose another. Not Hailey. She was too important to him. Yeah, he had a thing with Erin way back, but she hadn't fought for him. He was ready to propose to her, and she left without a word. He couldn't even imagine Hailey doing the same thing.

He ran his hands through his hair in frustration. He let out a groan, one of anger and grief, for someone he had yet to lose, but was going to no matter what. He had to do something, he couldn't just sit here. He quickly typed something back to Vanessa before getting up off the couch for a minute.

He needed another drink, and he was almost out of whiskey. Tequila would have to do, he reasoned as he rifled through his cabinet for another bit of liquid numbing.

When he brought the drink back with him, he noticed his phone had chimed again, signaling another message.

What, I mean why? Vanessa, is there something else I need to know? He had typed back to her. Her response awaited him, so he snapped open his text messages again, preparing himself to read whatever Hailey's roommate had written.

She won't tell me, but she will listen to you. Just call her, please. See if she'll talk to you.

So, albeit with shaky fingers, he found Hailey's number, which was the first on his speed dial. It rang…once, twice, three times, before his hopes that she would pick up were dashed. The slightly naïve part of him wanted to say that she had just fallen asleep; but the wiser part knew better. She wasn't ready to talk, and while he could understand, that didn't mean he wasn't going to try and get through to her.

Hailey had dozed off accidentally, having fallen asleep on top of her suitcase. She woke up randomly with a slight start, until she glanced at the clock in her room. It read 4:30. Great, I have to be up in an hour, so Vanessa can get me to the airport by 6. She sighed, deciding to put on her airport clothes while she was still half-awake.

She plugged her phone in to charge, as it was on 55% battery. She hadn't bothered to open it, only turning on her alarm, leaving it so she could find an oversized t-shirt and leggings. She picked up an old University of Chicago tee, and slipped it on. The same was done with a pair of black leggings. She ran a hand through her messy waves, deciding she'd deal with it in an hour, when she had more energy to wrangle it into a ponytail. For now, sleep was taking over every fiber of her being. So, she let it.

The next hour flew by faster than she would have liked, but nevertheless, her alarm woke her up on time. She rolled over onto her back, turning the alarm off before flipping her phone to airplane mode so it could finish charging. She forced herself to sit up in bed, finally pulling her hair back into a ponytail.

She heard a knock on her door, so she told whomever it was to come in. It was Vanessa, holding a plate with pancakes. "Apology breakfast," she said, handing the plate to Hailey.

"You really didn't need to," she paused, looking up at Vanessa, who seemed a bit shier in the doorway. "If anyone needs to be apologizing, it's me. I'm sorry I snapped at you last night."

"It's okay, Hailey. I get it…it's been one hell of a 24 hours," Vanessa drily laughed. "So listen, just eat up and yell when you're ready to roll, okay?"

"Okay," Hailey agreed, digging in to the breakfast. She was hungry, as she really didn't eat dinner last night.

A little bit later, she had zipped up her suitcase and slipped on her shoes. "Vanessa, I'm all set!" She called down to her roommate.

"Okay, I'll go start the car!" Vanessa called back, and Hailey heard their front door open and close. She shook her head, smiling a little as she carried her bag downstairs.

She got it out the front door, before Vanessa insisted on putting it in the trunk for her. She thanked her, before hopping into the passenger seat. "Thank you for taking me," she looked over to Rojas as she pulled out of their parking space.

"Sure thing, Hailey."

The drive to O'Hare was 20 minutes, most of which Vanessa and Hailey just made small talk. No big subjects needed to be broached right before she headed off. They both knew that much. When they pulled up to the drop-off zone, Vanessa unloaded Hailey's suitcase from the trunk, and gave her roommate a big hug goodbye.

Hailey hugged her tightly back, as she was really gonna miss having her around for the next two weeks. It would be weird to wake up alone again. "I'll call you when I land," she promised. She gave Vanessa one final wave before she checked in her luggage.

She watched as Vanessa nodded in her direction, before getting back into the car and driving away towards the exit. And probably towards work, Hailey reasoned, shaking her head sadly as she watched the car go. She wished she was going into that workplace too. She sighed, attempting to steel her resolve. She knew Voight's intentions were good, but she still hated being away from everyone she held so close to her heart.

Yeah, some more than others, her mind taunted. Hailey scoffed to herself, pushing the stupid thought aside. She was not going to think about those feelings right now. No, the only emotions she was going to let herself feel were a slight sadness at missing her whole team, and a little bit of anger at her boss for forcing her to do this. She didn't think her body and mind could handle anything else right now.

She made her way through security in a fairly timely fashion, and she pulled open her phone once she found her gate. The clock read 7:20, which meant she had about half an hour until they began to board. A coffee sounds lovely right about now, she thought, looking around for the nearest Starbucks.

She spotted one at the other end of her section of gates, so she took the few minutes to walk to it. She had kept her wallet and phone in her pocket, those were her only "carry-on" items. She had never really been a purse girl.

"Hi, one tall Americano please," she told the barista as she stepped up in line. While she waited for her order to be made, she finally took her phone off of airplane mode. She had 3 texts, all of which were from Vanessa, filled with a multitude of emoji's and I ALREADY MISS YOU's. What stood out to her though was the one voicemail from midnight yesterday.

She opened up her voicemail box, and listened to the message.

Hey Hailey, it's me. I know you probably aren't ready to talk yet…to me, or to anyone I imagine. I'm glad Vanessa's okay after everything she went through today. But, what I don't know is how you're doing…if you're okay. And, well, we're partners Hailey. Your pain is kind of mine as well, no matter what. Remember when I said good or bad, right or wrong, what you do concerns me? Well, it was true then, and it's still true now, because I'm concerned about you. Please, just call me back. I know it's not the same thing as doing the thing that works between us face-to-face, but you were the one that said we'd feel better about things after we talked. It's helped me, and I know it's helped you too, because I saw the old Hailey come back a little bit over these last few weeks. Anyway, I'm here. And we're always gonna be good, Hails. I'll see you when you get back, okay? Bye.

She had been still the entire time the 2-minute message played on her phone. She hadn't even noticed that her coffee was ready until the barista was in her direct line of sight again.

"Oh, I'm sorry," she whispered, coming out of her daze only to retrieve her coffee. She still moved slowly, not really sure of what to do from here. She carefully made her way back to her gate, her coffee in one hand, and the other wiping a stray tear that had fallen from her eyes.

Dammit, Jay.

A/N: Long time, no write guys! I've seen a few stories based off of Hailey's leaving for New York to do the FBI task force gig, and decided to write my own version of it. Hope you guys liked it so far. As I said in the description, it's a little more Hailey-centric than my other fics, as she's gone through a lot this season, especially in 7x12 and 7x18. I think she'll be changed for the better when she returns to Chicago, but, in the meantime, I'm going to be writing about said changes she goes through in this story. Hope that makes sense!