After the Episode: Schemer Goes Camping

Notes: Here's a lighthearted one. Hope you have fun reading! As always, reviews are greatly appreciated.

"Hey Schemer." Billy greeted his friend as he casually walked up to the arcade. All day, Schemer had been keeping quiet and busying himself with his machines. He had, as Ginny would have said, eaten a slice of humble pie with his camping trip last weekend. Billy was certain that's why he was keeping a low profile.

"Oh hey Billy, what's going on?" Schemer greeted him back. If his ego was bruised he didn't show it outright. That being said, Billy had noticed as time went on, Schemer had become overall mellower while only orchestrating the odd scheme to keep it interesting around the Station. The schemes themselves became less frequent and less dramatic as time went on. It actually seemed that Schemee's flare for dramatics increased as his Uncle's decreased. However, if Billy was being honest sometimes having a "normal" Schemer was a welcome change.

"Not a whole lot, but I was wondering what you were up to this weekend. I have an exciting proposition." Billy offered, knowing full well that Schemer could never resist anything that sounded like it had the potential for chaos, despite his apparent increase in maturity.

Schemers eyes glittered with interest. "Go on."

"My brother has a cabin, it's just outside the Indian Valley. He's offered it to me anytime I want to use it. It's available this weekend, but I can't make it up until Saturday. I was wondering if you wanted to go up a day early with Schemee to get some enjoyment out of it. I asked Stacy as well but she's busy, so instead I can meet you up there later this weekend with my nephew, Kit, to give Schemee has some company as well." Billy explained

He expected to be turned down, but was hoping Schemer might take it. Not just so that Schemer could learn that getting acquainted with the outdoors took time, patience, and practice. A cabin was the perfect place to start on that point. But it also gave Schemer a way to spend quality time with his nephew, and in a setting where he might not feel that he had to show off. It seemed to Billy that most of Schemer's actions were to get people to like him, and he was hoping this would help Schemer understand that they liked him all the same. Not to mention, while Billy may not be raising his own nephew, he was beginning to feel that Schemee might just want his uncle to spend time with him, not show off to him.

To Schemer's credit, he only contemplated a moment. Leaning casually on his jukebox, he drummed his fingers absentmindedly while looking towards the ceiling. "Alright Billy, that sounds great, thanks!"

Billy smiled in response. "Perfect, I'll get you the directions and keys."

The drive up wasn't terribly long and Schemer filled it with chatter. Schemee nodded along, not adding too much to the conversation but listened to his Uncle companionably. Schemer had a weekend full of activities planned by the sounds of it, but Schemee had also been able to glean that from the fact that the trunk was packed to the brim with stuff. And it was random stuff, at that. Schemee had also deduced, judging from his Uncle's camping trip, that Schemer had about as much experience with cottages as he did with camping. Which is to say, none.

Schemee was a bit surprised that his Uncle hadn't been more upset about being "abandoned" in the woods. Granted, his Uncle often played up situations if he thought it might get a laugh or amusement, especially for the kids at the Station, but Schemer hadn't said much beyond the confrontation at the Station with Schemee. In fact, Schemer had seemed somewhat glad that Schemee had left for safety. This made Schemee feel mildly guilty, but also wary of this weekend. What antics would Schemer come up with this time?

They arrived without incident and Schemer stretched languidly as he exited the car, taking in the natural beauty that surrounded them. The cottage was a small but well maintained log cabin situated on a fairly large property. Trees surrounded them on all sides and there was a footpath leading to a private beach on the lake.

Schemer noticed a brick and stone fire pit and his look of wonder was replaced with that of a hunter spying his quarry. There was no redemption for his tent pitching skills after the initial tent disaster, but he would master the art of fire like a true man of the woods. Schemee followed his Uncle's gaze and understood how the gears were turning in his head at that moment. He tried to mask a grimace, but failed.

"Have you ever had s'mores, Schemee?" Schemer asked with a hushed voice.

"No, never." Schemee replied, and he was certain that his answer wouldn't change by the end of the weekend.

"Good, because be prepared to be blown away tonight when I make s'mores a la Schemer!"

"I can hardly wait." Schemee responded neutrally.

If Schemer detected a lack of excitement from his nephew, he didn't show it. "I know you can't. Now go unpack, and feel free to explore because I'm going to figure out how to make them!"

Schemee realized there was no rationalizing with his Uncle and promptly left to explore as per his suggestion. He gave himself what he felt was enough time before returning to his Uncle. He found his timing was accurate, as his Uncle was past his flustered stage and well into the pleading stage.

"Will you please just light?!" Schemer asked aloud to the barely-smoking pile of sticks in front of him. He then noticed Schemee and tried to save face.

"Oh hey Schemee, it might be a bit longer for dinner. The fire is just about to start roaring." Schemer said, sidestepping to try to block the fire pit with his body.

Schemee just shrugged, knowing that it was better to let his Uncle excuse himself instead of calling out his defeat. "It's okay. Could we… could we just cook inside? I'm getting hungry."

Schemer's face fell slightly but he quickly caught himself. "Yeah sure Schemee, okay. I didn't feel like s'mores anyways."

Schemee followed him inside with another minor sense of guilt that he tried to repress. The rest of the evening was relatively low-key. They played cards, trying to out-cheat the other of course, and it ended with them retreating to opposite twin beds. Schemee had to admit, his first feeling about the trip wasn't entirely wrong, and he much preferred it when his Uncle didn't try so hard. But at the same time, he had to consider that maybe this trip was as much about showing off to Schemee, as it was about proving something to himself.

Schemee rolled over, contemplating this over. Perhaps there was something they could do to meet half way.

Billy arrived with Kit in tow the next day. Schemee and Kit, both introverts who kept their distance to strangers, seemed to immediately recognize this within the other. They formed a rapport around this shared personality and while it didn't inspire boisterous play, they had no trouble getting along and wandered off to explore the area together.

"Do you know what's in a s'more? I want to make one." Schemee asked Kit carefully, not wanting to sound naïve or unaware of something so seemingly basic.

"Marshmallow, chocolate, and graham cracker. You toast the marshmallow first to melt it." Kit explained.

Schemee nodded along, pretending this was common knowledge that he was merely confirming.

Meanwhile back at the camp, Billy was patiently coaching Schemer on making a fire.

Schemer threw down the two sticks in his hands into the fire pit in frustration. "This is hopeless!" He cried angrily.

"You have to use kindling first. It'll start to burn faster and get hotter, and then you slowly add the larger pieces of wood that take longer to catch fire and burn. That's what gives you the long lasting flames. You can also build the larger pieces around the kindling." Billy said gently.

Schemer just grumbled in response but he gathered up the smaller pieces, the kindling as Billy had called it, into a pile. Billy handed him the matches and Schemer threw one down. To his utter amazement the pile started to smoulder, and then small flames danced along the twigs, leaving ashy trails in their wake. Schemer nearly whooped with glee and Billy gave a small, grateful smile.

"I did it!" Schemer exclaimed gleefully.

"You did, but quickly add more before it burns out!" Billy pointed out.

Schemer piled on more kindling and the flames grew quickly. He face split into a grin. Billy handed him the larger sticks and they propped them up around the small fire.

"Now once it gets hot enough to start burning the larger sticks we can add the logs." He said as he pre-emptively handed the logs to Schemer.

Once they were properly set into the fire Schemer raised his head wildly as he searched around. "Schemee!" He hollered while Billy winced at his sudden booming voice.

Schemee dutifully came up to the fire pit and his eyes widened at the sight.

"Voila! Fire!" Schemer gestured at the now soaring flames. Schemee had to admit he was impressed.

"Hey guys, not to break up the party but I'm thinking about going for a boat ride if you want to come along." Billy stood up, stretching out his arms.

"No thanks! I want to stay here and watch my creation!" Schemer said proudly while Schemee nodded fervently.

Billy shook his head in a good-natured way. "Suit yourselves, enjoy!" With that, Billy and Kit descended upon the dock to the small aluminum fishing boat and roared away into the open water.

Schemer and Schemee sat in silence, watching the flames. The crackling and popping of burning wood was mesmerizing and the level of heat that was given off impressed Schemee.

He was struck with a sudden thought. "Uncle Schemer!" He grabbed his Uncle's arm, shaking him out of his own reverie. "I know how to make s'mores!"

Schemer turned to Schemee with equal excitement. "You do?!" His face suddenly dropped into a stoic expression. "I mean, I do too!"

Schemee ignored this claim, and continued on. "Yeah, you need marshmallows, graham crackers, and chocolate."

The two raced to the kitchen and after raiding the cupboards all three ingredients were recovered. However, they ran into their first dilemma.

"What kind of chocolate should we use?" Schemer asked, forgetting his claims of knowing how to make s'mores.

Schemee shrugged, his knowledge only went as far as the key ingredients. Schemer held three types in his arms; chocolate chips, a chocolate bar, and baking chocolate. "I'm not sure. All three?" Schemee shrugged and hazarded a guess.

Schemer nodded sagely. "Good enough!" He declared as they raced back to the fire.

Now that they had their ingredients, they encountered their second problem.

"How do we put it all together?" Schemee asked out loud, examining the crackers and marshmallows.

Schemer pondered this for a moment. "Well, you always see people roasting marshmallows on a stick when they're camping on TV. I think we should do that!" He declared as he fumbled around, looking for an appropriately sized stick.

"Kit said we had to toast the marshmallow first to melt it!" Schemee said in agreement, not caring that he had given away the source of his information.

They each plunked a marshmallow onto a stick and got to work. It didn't take long for them to see a colour change to a golden brown, however neither realized the problem with putting a marshmallow so close to a direct flame until Schemee's marshmallow caught fire.

"Ah, ahhhhhhhhh!" Schemee cried, swinging his flaming marshmallow stick around. Schemer ducked to avoid impact with the now hazardous food item, and the flames just singed the very tip of his curl. He patted his head in a panic and was immediately relieved to find his curl still intact. Grabbing the stick, he stomped the marshmallow out.

"Let's not try that again." He suggested and discarded his own marshmallow to the fire.

Schemee nodded in agreement, pretending that he didn't notice a small twist of smoke that resulted from the marshmallow contacting his Uncle's curl. That was a close call that he didn't want to repeat.

"Okay, so marshmallows are out. Let's figure out the chocolate." Schemer suggested. He grabbed a piece of baker's chocolate and sampled it without hesitation.

"Blech! This stuff is awful!" He cried, pushing the bag away. "That's not chocolate, it's too bitter!"

Schemee tried a few chocolate chips, and fortunately they tasted fine. "Maybe these will work." He suggested as he looked around, thinking about what to do with them.

He placed a few on top of a marshmallow, and when they fell off he pushed some into the marshmallow so that they stayed put. He looked at the creation thoughtfully, knowing that it wasn't right because he hadn't toasted the marshmallow first. He shrugged, figuring that the equation was close enough to the answer, and placed the marshmallow and chocolate hybrid onto a graham cracker and set it near the fire.

"Okay, now we're getting somewhere!" Schemer exclaimed excitedly.

The marshmallow began to melt, but only on the side closest to the flames, resulting in an extremely lopsided concoction of chocolatey-marshmallow and raw marshmallow.

"I think it's ready!" Schemer said impatiently as he reached towards the mess. Schemee felt a rush of panic and went to snatch it. "It needs rotating!" He cried out.

They collided in the middle and Schemee's hand squashed the half made s'more in the chaos. In horror, they both gapped at the massacre.

"It's ruined!" Schemee exclaimed angrily.

Schemer recoiled, but then a frown took over his face. "I thought you said yesterday you didn't even want a s'more?"

"Yeah! But we worked so hard!" Schemee retorted.

Schemer looked shocked but then his face broke into a grin. "I knew I'd catch your interest eventually! You wanted to learn what a s'more was with me!"

"I don't think you know what a s'more is." Schemee confessed. "And I don't either for that matter."

"Sure I do! I just wanted to see you try your version first. Now watch!" Schemer turned on his heel to grab the bag of marshmallows, forgetting he had stomped out the earlier flaming marshmallow mess. He slipped and fell arm first into the remainder of Schemee's s'more attempt, sending marshmallows and chocolate pieces everywhere.

It was at this moment that Billy and Kit returned. "We're back, what did we… miss?" Billy trailed off as he surveyed the scene.

Schemer and Schemee blinked at them stoically from their positions, in the midst of the sugary mess. The fire flickered innocently in the background.

"Dare I ask?" Billy finally broke the silence.

"Uh, s'mores?" Schemer responded haughtily. "Haven't you made them before Billy?"

"Yes, many times, but I don't usually end up wearing them." He said with an exasperated look. "Go to the lake and wash up, it'll be easier than dragging this mess through the cottage." As he took notice of Schemer's pout he rolled his eyes. "And then I'll show you how to make s'mores." He relented.

Schemer and Schemee trudged down to the water like a pair of scolded schoolboys. Neither spoke immediately, instead they scrubbed the sticky substance off their skin as best they could. Schemer soaked the sleeve of his shirt and tried to pick the larger pieces off.

Schemee turned to look at him incredulously. "You've never made s'mores before in your life, have you?"

Schemer stammered, trying to think of an excuse before he heaved a deep sigh. "No, I haven't." He admitted.

"Why did you say you had?" Schemee asked. He wasn't judging, he was merely curious.

"Because I thought it was what you're supposed to do when you go camping or to a cottage. You make a fire, and you make s'mores." He said dully. "I couldn't get the camping part right so I figured if I took all the other stuff out of the equation I could start a bit smaller. Looks like I wasn't prepared again." He gave a half-hearted smile.

Schemee didn't immediately understand. "Why is it something you're supposed to do? Who says that you have to do it?"

Schemer shrugged. "I don't know, it just reminds me of what I've seen on television. Families going camping, or scout leaders leading their tropes on an adventure." He trailed off.

It then struck Schemee what his Uncle wanted. He smiled because it was so simple, and it wasn't just because his Uncle wanted to show off and get attention.

"Well, I had fun." Schemee said simply as he stood up from the water.

Schemer's face brightened. "You did?"

"I did, and we'll even get to learn how to make s'mores together." Schemee replied happily.

Schemer's face split into a grin. "Good, I'm glad. I had fun too. Let's head back to the fire." He turned to Schemee suddenly. "Oh, and before I forget…" He trailed off suspiciously.

"What?" Schemee asked, concern spreading over his features.

Schemer didn't respond but instead grabbed Schemee by the shoulders, who could only screech in disbelief of being tricked, and threw him into the lake. Schemee surfaced, sputtering angrily.

"Hey!" He hollered. "What was that for?"

Schemer crouched down, hands on his knees and a devious grin on his face. "That, my dear nephew, was for leaving me behind in the woods with only dangerous wild animals for company." He turned on his heel to walk away, gloating internally for getting the upper hand. His victory was short lived when two hands wrapped around his ankle and he found himself being yanked down towards the water.

"Not fair! I'm the adult!" He cried as he floundered about. Schemee splashed him in response, with Schemer immediately retaliating with a splash aimed at Schemee.

Billy watched the scene from a distance with a grin and slow shake of his head. As much as he could see how the two had grown together and formed a family, and he was truly happy for them as he watched them mature, he had to admit that he truly hoped that the light-hearted and chaotic parts of them never changed. It kept life around the Station energetic and interesting.