"And just what the hell is that supposed to mean?" Annabeth asked shrilly.

She and her boyfriend, Percy, had been living together for a few months now, and ever since they'd decided to take that step, Annabeth had found herself absolutely perplexed by Percy's behavior.

In public, he was outgoing. He laughed and smiled and joked around with no problem. Percy Jackson could light up a room with nothing more than his mere presence.

When he was at home, however, he was different.

The smile that Annabeth had fallen in love with would slide off of his face, replaced with an empty, vacant expression. All the life would seem to just drain out of him, and he would sit on the couch, content to do nothing for hours. The chores around their apartment went undone. His college homework was ignored until the very last minute. He just sat there, absorbed in the TV or his video games. To Annabeth, it felt as though he were as useful and energetic as a statue.

At the moment, though, the couple was arguing for the second time that week.

Well, Annabeth was arguing. She had just thrown Percy's prized minotaur horn through their bedroom window, shattering the glass. They listened as the horn hit the ground outside, and unless Percy was mistaken, the horn had broken with a piercing CRACK.

The daughter of Athena breathed heavily through her nose. Percy was sitting on their bed, his elbows on his knees, his hands clasped as he stared at the carpet beneath his feet.

"It means exactly what I said," he muttered tiredly, "I just… don't feel anything."

It had taken several minutes of intense yelling for Annabeth to coax this confession from him, and even then, he didn't bother to tell her the whole truth. He omitted how tired he felt, and how fed up he was with everyone's expectations of him. He didn't tell her how hanging out with all of his old friends exhausted him to no end, nor how college just seemed to eat away at him. In fact, between juggling his education, his relationship, and his responsibilities as a demigod, Percy found himself worn pretty thin.

Annabeth crossed her arms. She looked so upset that Percy thought she might start crying… or she might just skip a few stages of grief and hit him. It was hard to be sure. If he was honest with himself, he couldn't blame her. Most days he felt like kicking himself for being such a slave to the stress.

"But I've seen you with Jason and Frank," she insisted, "and Nico, and Leo, and everyone else! You're always cracking jokes and laughing! You only act so sullen when you're around me!"

Without even meaning to, Annabeth had begun yelling again. Percy scowled, choosing to ignore all the little problems with his girlfriend's argument. There was no 'acting' involved, he was sullen because he was so gods damned tired all the time. And it wasn't just around Annabeth, either, he felt it every day when he woke up, every night when he laid down to rest, and every single hour in between.

But he chose to ignore this. He couldn't burden Annabeth with his pointless sadness. He rubbed a hand over his face, feeling a prickle.

'I have to shave again,' he thought.

It was just another thing to add to his already overwhelming to-do list.

After taking a deep breath, Percy tried to focus on the conversation with Annabeth, but her yelling only put him off. For a moment, he was tempted to tell her everything, but the idea made his throat tighten uncomfortably.

How was he supposed to express his frustrations over losing his entire young adulthood to his demigod responsibilities? How could he get Annabeth to understand how hard it was for him to process all but the most intense emotions? And even then, could he explain that his witty sarcasm was little more than an impromptu coping mechanism?

No, he couldn't tell her any of that. She wouldn't understand… and what if she hated him for it? Would she leave him if he revealed how truly weak he was? It was a risk he couldn't take.

"That's not true," he replied.

Annabeth studied him carefully. Percy could see the tears in her eyes, but the anger behind them was harder to look upon.

"I suppose I just don't understand how you can be so callous," she murmured, wrapping her arms more tightly about her person.

As much as Percy wanted to refute that statement, he couldn't. She was already crying, and something of her words rang true. Of course he was callous. After saving the world a bajillion freaking times, anyone would grow a little tempered. After facing down a million life threatening scenarios, who wouldn't become a little… numb?

He bit back a bitter smile. Somehow, he got the distinct impression that smirking would only make the situation worse.

"It's pretty damn easy," Percy sighed carelessly, "you just have to constantly fight for survival for almost a decade, and push the crippling fear of a painful death onto the backburner, where it can turn you into a cynical, hollow shell of the person you thought you would."

In an instant, Percy realized that he had said too much. Annabeth stared down at him, wide eyed and astounded, as though her entire view of him had been skewed since they'd first met, and she was just now getting a clear picture. All of his cynical jokes, and all of his obliviousness now seemed different. It wasn't quite as funny and endearing as it once was. Now it was touched with a cold disregard that she had never seen before.

"So what? You wish you were never a demigod?"

A single tear fell from the corner of Percy's eye, but otherwise, his face was a blank mask. Slowly, his expression twisted, pulled into a humorless grin that made him appear to be an entirely different person.

"Yeah," he realized, "I wish for that every day."

Author's Notes:

Well, ladies and gents, it is currently real sad boy hours. I had this realization that Percy, while ideally a well adjusted and healthy young man, may not have ended up that way. What if everything he'd been through took a toll on his relationship with Annabeth? What if, in some deep, dark part of our beloved hero, he wished his responsibilities weren't his?

Here's a ton of sad music to listen to while you think about sad stuff...

Time In A Tree- Raleigh Ritchie

Slow Dancing In The Dark- JOJI

hopes up- nothing, nowhere

Wither-Jake Hill

hiccup- versache

Low- Lund

Mr. Rattlebone- Matt Maeson

I never thought you'd be my enemy- vaboh

again- timmies ft. Shiloh

I'm not coming home- Brennan Savage

the broken hearts club- gnash

forever/over- EDEN

Don't let the sadness keep you down, guys. Thanks for reading.