Another new story. Remember, I'm starting all these new stories to raise interest in my work! If I can get enough people excited about my writing and willing to become donating patrons, I'll be able to write all of these stories and finish all my old works as well! And I have a TON of story ideas! For more info on that, just check my bio here! And remember; Patrons get all sorts of bonuses! So support my work today!

This story is a bit of a weirder one. And, unlike a lot of my stories, this one is rated for mild language. Just thought I'd give a heads up.

Also, I actually intended to have the first big plot point occur in this chapter, but it wound up making it FAR too long. So it was split up into two parts. The next one will include the first major event. This one still has all the important set up stuff to help start us out on this crazy tale!

Remember to leave me a review! It's my only way to know if you're enjoying what I'm writing! And be sure to take a look at my bio when you get a chance! Enjoy!

Chapter 1: A Perfect Night

"See, what did I tell you? You just let Kenny get killed again."

Stan watched Kenny's lifeless body flop over in a pathetic heap as a 'told-you-so' sort of smirk spread across his face and he nestled himself deeper into the pillow behind him, pleased with his correct prediction.

Kyle, who sat just beside Stan with his weight leaned back on his hands, laughed in response. "Bastard." He jokingly accused.

"Yeah, thanks a lot, dude." Kenny added, most of his mumbled voice absorbed into his thick coat. Despite his sarcastic words, his tone was that of a more playful teasing rather than actually angry or upset.

"Hey! I'm doing the best I can!" Cartman, who was seated atop the old, somewhat discolored couch, snapped in mild irritation. "It's not my fault that Kenny's impatient and keeps going towards the turrets I haven't gotten to yet!"

Kenny giggled quietly at the accusation, knowing it was true but still more than willing to poke fun at the larger boy nonetheless. In the end, though, no real harm was done, as Kenny's robotic avatar reappeared on his side of the screen in only a few seconds time, good as new.

"Why don't you just shoot a portal on the floor beneath each turret?" Kyle curiously questioned, rearranging his feet in front of him. "That way, you can take them out faster and Kenny can cut through to the end and hit the switch."

Cartman, who's character had just wandered into the line of fire of an enemy, jumped slightly in his seat and deftly manipulated the controller firmly held in his grasp, guiding his avatar back to safety. "It's not that easy, Kyle!" He growled. "Can't you see the gray floor below them? You cant shoot portals on gray, stupid."

"Well, then just shoot a portal behind them all." Stan suggested, watching Kenny's side of the screen as he opened up some portals on the walls around Cartman's character and rejoined him in the main room of the current puzzle. "You can knock em all over at once."

Having been stuck on this particular level for a while now, Cartman was surprisingly open to his friends suggestions. Trusting Stan knew what he was talking about, he shot a portal across the room and behind the army of sentry turrets that guarded the far switch.

By the time he noticed what he had just done, he was too late to take it back. The positioning of his portals along with the ones Kenny had just used to reenter the room had strung themselves together and provided one of the sentries with a clear view of the two 'intruder' players. The turrets quipped a brief warning before mowing both targets down in a hail of bullets. Cartman and Kenny's characters, now with more holes than Swiss cheese, crumbled to the floor like rag dolls. They would be forced to both re-spawn to start the puzzle over.

Thankfully, the entire situation proved more humorous than frustrating. All four of the boys gathered around the basement tv roared with laughter, amazed at how perfectly all their moves had come together to create such a disaster.

"Man, screw this game, you guys." Cartman tried in vain to repress a chuckle, callously tossing his game controller to the floor near the other boys. "I'm gonna grab another soda."

Kyle, having gone the longest since his last turn, didn't hesitate in claiming the thrown device. "I'll take a sprite." He called out, taking control of the robotic avatar and heading off with Kenny's towards the puzzle.

"Yeah, me too." Stan added flatly.

"Jesus, what am I, everyone's moms?" Cartman growled, yanking open the door to the mini fridge beneath the stairs.

For this group of snarky and mischievous fourth grade boys, special nights like these were the best parts of their young lives. Nights where they could all be together, doing what they loved without any unwanted adult intervention. Though few and far between, they were moments where all four of the ten year old's could get along, too distracted by pizza and video games to quarrel.

This particular night had been made possible by Eric Cartman's mother. After hurriedly passing off her son to the Marsh's household a week prior, claiming a particular 'client' of hers had suddenly requested her appearance in a town several hours away, she felt as though she owed the other mothers of the boys for always being willing to lend a helping hand. So she had allowed Eric to invite Stan, Kyle, and Kenny over for an impromptu party that weekend. It was nothing much; she bought the boys their favorite pizzas and snacks, stocked the downstairs mini fridge, and helped her son to set up all his video game consoles with the big flat screen tv in the basement. Simple enough, but exactly what made for a perfect night in the children's minds.

Cartman returned a moment later, chucking one can of soda each onto Stan and Kyle's backs, eliciting small exclamations of surprise and discomfort. In a rare show of human decency, Cartman had even grabbed an extra drink for Kenny, knowing he would most likely want one despite not having asked for it like the others. Kenny acknowledged this act of kindness with a muffled 'thank you', knowing not to make a big deal out of it if he ever wanted little things like this to happen again.

Making sure to avoid allowing his portals to line up with Kenny's, Kyle successfully transported himself behind the wall of baddies. Out of their line of fire, he deftly picked up one of the turrets and used it as a battering ram to knock the others to the floor like a chain of dominoes. The downed sentries fired a frenzy of panicked shots before finally deactivating, allowing Kenny to safely traverse the area and the two players to reach the exit.

"Nice, dude." Stan complimented, reaching a hand out as Kenny passed his controller to the boy seated on the floor.

Kyle took a quick moment to flash a smug smile towards the two sitting on the couch behind him, popping open his soda like a well-earned reward. Cartman rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, whatever." He grumbled. "It's easy when you don't get screwed over by Kenny's dumb portals."

The boys continued the game in this fashion, solving the steady stream of logic and skill puzzles and trading the two controllers off whenever one got frustrated or one had gone too long without playing. Whoever wasn't currently in control of the pair of video game robots would shout suggestions or inane insults at the others, happily munching on more pizza or curling up in the mess of pillows, blankets, and sleeping bags.

It was after the quartet arrived at a particularly difficult puzzle that they finally decided they had had enough of the current game. Cartman had backed the console into its main menu once more, then lifted himself from his seat to retrieve and safely put away the still warm disc that had just been playing.

"How did it even expect us to get past that level?" Stan took a moment to lift to his feet and stretch his stiff back.

"I think you were supposed to paint a ramp using that goo stuff." Kenny responded as he leapt off the couch and began to make his way towards the stairs. "I'll be right back, guys."

If not for the lack of a bathroom, the boys would never emerge from the basement during a night such as this. Liane would only catch brief glimpses of the boys as they emerged from the basement door, decorated with a "MOM STAY OUT" poster written in angry scribbles, and went directly into the bathroom, only sometimes offering a 'hey' or other form of acknowledgement as they passed.

Cartman had talked the remaining two boys into briefly switching consoles to play their next video game, as it was a console exclusive. With a knowledge built upon experience, the larger boy quickly deactivated and detached the many connections that tied the Xbox 360 to the television. The tv, free of the systems signal, returned to the all-day movie channel that it had been set to before the boys had started gaming. As Cartman grabbed the equipment needed to rig up his Nintendo Switch dock, Stan and Kyle couldn't help but watch the current film now playing on the large, flat screen.

A young boy attempted to control a small, withered looking creature through his home, as it did it's best to poke and prod at everything and get into all the stuff it wasn't supposed to. When being forcefully moved, the creature responded with ugly, goose-like wails, slightly extending its long, wrinkled neck for better vantage points.

"Geez." Stan commented with a smirk, taking a free spot on the plush couch behind him. "I guess I've never seen this movie in high def. I didn't realize just how ugly E.T. really is."

Kyle, momentarily recalling the director of this film and shuddering slightly, still not over some past trauma involving the man, nodded slowly and joined his best friend on the seat. "Yeah, I never liked him, honestly." He quipped. "He's ugly and stupid and whines a lot about nothing. And what kind of kid would bring an unidentifiable alien into their house?"

Beside him, Stan laughed in agreement, just as Cartman succeeded in connecting the new console causing the movie to disappear and the Nintendo Switch menu to take its place. "I know! I would'a called the cops! Or, like, the Men in Black or something. A kid shouldn't be handling alien life forms by himself! What if they turned out to be hostile?"

"I'd actually be more concerned about catching some sort of alien virus or disease or something." Kyle took another sip of his drink. "Who knows what kind of contamination that things got on it? It's probably covered in bacteria that our bodies would never be able to fight against!"

"Doesn't the kid wind up getting sick and dying because of just that?" Cartman asked, roughly forcing Stan over a few inches so he could take his favorite spot at the arm of the couch.

Having been Cartman's 'friend' for so long, Stan barely took notice of the forceful re-positioning. "He doesn't die, fatass. He gets sick when the alien gets sad or sick or whatever. But then he gets better and the alien goes home. The end."

"Pff, close enough." The larger boy was more than used to the mean spirited nickname and didn't give it a second thought. "The movie sucks anyway."

"Agreed." Kyle nodded.

"You guys!" Kenny shouted from the top of the stairs, trying his best to project his voice through the fluffy barrier around his face. "You gotta come up here! Eric's mom set up Make Your Own Sundaes!"

"No way!" Cartman immediately discarded the colorful joy-cons in his hands and bolted up the stairs much faster than the speed he usually moved at.

"Dude, sweet!" Kyle added, he and Stan following close behind the other two.

It truly was one of those rare, perfect nights for the boys. One they'd be sure to remember for many years to come. Nothing could spoil a night like this.

At least, that's what they had thought. But the strange, heavily armed vehicle beginning its descent through the layers of atmosphere above was about to prove otherwise.