A/N: Hey guys! Here's another Hetalia fic... and there's more coming in the future... something is wrong with me, I can only write for this fandom... Help me... O.O Anyway, this is a birthday fic for one of my great friends, Ginae (aka Finland). Oops! This is a couple days late. Oh well! She probably won't mind ;) So, courtesy of my friend's birthday, have some fluffy Nordic family stuff with some America, Prussia, and England for free!
Oh, and on request of Ginae, here are the human names:
Matthias- Denmark
Gilbert- Prussia
Alfred- America
Lukas- Norway
Emil- Iceland
On with the show!
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Hetalia. Sadly...
The Nordics were really just like any other family. They had inside jokes, embarrassing stories, and shared moments that they would never forget. Like that time that Denmark got roaring drunk and proposed to Norway (Norway turned him down… that time). Or when Sweden and Finland first adopted Sealand, and Finland had come to Norway asking for parenting advice. And all of them especially remembered the time when Iceland walked in on Norway and Denmark kissing and Iceland had run out screaming about trolls and evil spirits possessing his brother. In his defense, he was still just a small colony at that time.
The Nordics also knew plenty of things about each other. For example, always make sure you have a large supply of butter when Norway comes. If you run out, there will be consequences. Mostly involving curses. When you're with Denmark, prepare to either go drinking with him or haul his drunken self back to his house. Finland loves gossip, so never say anything around him that you want kept a secret. He will share it with everyone.
Not to say that the Nordics don't keep secrets from each other. They do. All people do. But they always share the big things with each other. Or so the others thought.
It all started with chocolate. It was Valentine's Day, and Norway was coming home from his date with Denmark. He was carrying a bouquet of roses in varying shades of red and white. Iceland was lounging across the couch when he walked in, texting on his phone.
"How was your date?" Iceland called without looking up.
"Fine. Just like every year. We went to a nice restaurant, ate ice cream after, and shared embarrassing stories about when you were little," Norway replied, smirking.
"What?! Tell me you didn't!" Iceland yelped, jumping up. Norway just laughed in response. Iceland fumed and stomped across the room to smack him on the shoulder. When Norway just laughed harder, Iceland smacked him again.
As Norway walked towards the kitchen, he paused. Something seemed different. After a few seconds of observation, he found the thing that seemed out of place. A box of expensive looking chocolates rested on the countertop, a silky white ribbon untied next to it. Norway frowned. Denmark typically didn't send him chocolates, knowing that Norway wasn't a huge fan. So…
"Hey, Ice? Did someone send you chocolates?" Norway asked, confused. Iceland wasn't in a relationship, as far as he knew.
"Oh, yeah. They're a present from my boyfriend. He was too busy to visit me today," Iceland answered. Suddenly, his eyes widened and he snapped his mouth shut. Everyone knew how Norway reacted to news involving his baby brother, especially when it involved relationships.
An ominous aura chilled the room, and Norway turned around to fix Iceland with a glare. "Your boyfriend?" he asked in a deceptively calm voice.
"Y-yeah," Iceland responded, deciding that it was probably best to just be truthful.
"Who is it? And how have I never met them?" Norway asked, placing his hands on his hips. Iceland gulped. Here it comes…
"Um… because I knew you'd react like this…?" Iceland answered, bracing himself for the explosion.
"Fair reason," Norway responded, the ominous aura dissipating. "Anyway, it's late. Shouldn't you be in bed?"
Iceland blinked in surprise. Norway wasn't going to kill him? What was going on? Maybe he was in a good mood because of Valentine's Day…? Yeah, that must be it.
"Okej. I'll see you in the morning, Norway," Iceland replied, exiting to go to his bedroom. Well, that went surprisingly well. Hopefully he'll drop it, Iceland thought.
Norway did not drop it. He decided that, to solve this mystery, he needed to call in some reinforcements.
Denmark picked up his phone to Norway's panicked voice. "Iceland has a boyfriend that he never told us about and I need help figuring out who it is!" Denmark blinked. Ice had a boyfriend?
"Okej, Norge, slow down, calm down. I'll be over as soon as I can," Denmark promised.
"No, I'm coming to you. Iceland could walk in on us if we're at my house," Norway replied before hanging up. Denmark sighed. He'd better make some hot chocolate.
An hour later, Denmark opened his door to Sweden and Finland.
"Hej, I'm assuming Norge called you too?" Denmark guessed as he escorted them inside.
"Yeah, he did. I didn't catch much, though. Something about Iceland and a secret boyfriend," Finland replied, shrugging.
"Iceland has a boyfriend that he never told us about, and I need your help to figure out who it is," Norway chose that exact moment to walk in, throwing his set of keys to Denmark's house into the dish next to the door.
"I made hot chocolate. I'll go get it while you guys get settled in," Denmark called as he entered the kitchen. He came back with a tray of four steaming mugs. After handing them out, he sat down next to Norway, wrapping an arm around his shoulders in a show of support.
"Start from the beginning, Norway," Finland coaxed. Norway took a sip of his hot chocolate before he started.
"I saw a box of expensive chocolates on the kitchen counter. When I asked Iceland about it, he said they were from his boyfriend. He clammed up before I could find out any more."
"You don't know who it is?" Sweden grunted. Norway shook his head.
"No. That's why I called all of you. I need your help to figure it out."
"Oh! I have an idea! What if we tied him up in the basement and not let him out until he tells us!" Finland cried in triumph. The icy glares he got from Norway and Denmark quickly squashed that plan.
After a minute or two of silence, Sweden spoke. "I have an idea. It may not work that well, but it may be a good start."
"What do you have in mind?" Denmark asked.
STAGE ONE: SWEDEN
Sweden's plan was simple: Sit Iceland down and talk about it.
Sweden asked Norway to arrange a Nordic family get-together at his house, thinking that Iceland would be more likely to talk in a comfortable and familiar environment. After a couple hours of ridiculous games (courtesy of Denmark) and embarrassing stories (Finland and Norway), Sweden "just so happened to" find himself alone with Iceland.
"So, Ice, you're getting to a certain age… Got your eye on anyone?" Sweden asked, attempting to be casual. Iceland choked on his Coke and stared at Sweden with wide eyes.
"H-how'd you know?!" Iceland sputtered.
"Intuition. So, who's the lucky person?" Sweden continued. Iceland flushed, so Sweden decided to go with a different question.
"What're they like?"
"He's super kind and caring. He's so sweet and always thinks about me. He can be a bit frustrating at times, and incredibly sarcastic, but in an endearing way. He's… perfect," Iceland replied, smiling softly. Sweden internally smiled. Who knew Iceland could be such a sap?
"What does he like to do?" Sweden decided this question was the least likely to make Iceland suspicious.
"He loves to cook. He likes going on the Internet, and programming, and watching anime. He also likes cute, fluffy things. When I went to visit him in-" Iceland cut himself off quickly, shooting Sweden a suspicious glance.
"You're trying to figure out who he is, aren't you?" Iceland asked.
"No. Just curious," Sweden replied. Iceland glared.
"I'm going to go find Norway," Iceland ground out, standing up and leaving Sweden on the couch.
Sweden sighed. While they were a step closer to figuring out who Iceland was dating, they still needed more information.
"Ice didn't tell me who it is," Sweden reported after Iceland had gone to bed. Everyone else groaned in frustration.
"Any other ideas?" Norway asked.
After a few minutes of thinking, Finland spoke up.
"Well, we got some information when Iceland was relaxed. I have an idea that might work."
STAGE TWO: FINLAND
Finland decided that taking Iceland shopping might work. After all, most people relaxed when they were shopping, and when people were relaxed, they tended to share information more easily. And, really, Iceland needed new clothes. Finland had weeped when he'd seen the state of his closet.
"Why do I need new clothes?" Iceland asked nervously. Finland almost cried out of pity for the poor thing. Norway really had deprived him as he was growing up.
"Because your entire wardrobe consists of clothes that make you look like either a nerd, a Goth, or a punk. You want to impress your boyfriend, don't you?" Finland responded, browsing through a rack of button-up shirts in Iceland's size.
"He doesn't really care what I dress like. He dresses pretty much the same way," Iceland shot back, shrugging. He made a face at the white button-up Finland held out for him, and Finland sighed and went back to browsing.
"Oh, he does? How did you two meet, exactly?" Finland asked, feigning a mild interest. Inside, he was screaming with delight. Learning how they met would lead him to the mysterious boyfriend's identity!
Iceland chuckled fondly. "We met at a World Meeting. His brother was annoying him, so I hid out with him, along with Canada and Japan."
Well, that crossed two people off the list. Not that Finland had actually considered Japan and Canada. After all, Japan was dating America, and Canada was married to Prussia. Hm, though… who else had annoying siblings…?
"Eventually his brother found us, though. But we managed to exchange numbers, and a couple years later… here we are!" Iceland continued, oblivious to Finland's deductions.
"Who's his brother?" Finland asked, foregoing all sense of subtlety. Iceland stiffened.
"Norway put you up to this, didn't he?" Finland panicked. How should he respond to this?!
Iceland sighed. "He did. Listen, there's a reason I didn't tell him about my boyfriend. Norway makes him nervous, and I'm respecting his wishes. Please stop trying to figure out who it is." Finland nodded, and they continued on their shopping trip, eventually picking out a few nice outfits in a few different colours, and a few casual outfits.
On their way back to Norway's house, however, Iceland paused in front of a toy store with a wistful look in his eyes. Finland followed his gaze, and saw a stuffed puffin nestled between a few other stuffed animals.
"That reminds me of him…" Iceland murmured quietly, thinking Finland wouldn't overhear. Finland did overhear, however, and he quickly snapped a picture in order to use it later.
"Anyway! I promised Norway that I'd have you back before it got dark. Come on! We've got to get going," Finland exclaimed, dragging Iceland behind him.
"I've made a list of potential suspects!" Finland exclaimed. They were all meeting at his and Sweden's house this time, and Finland had pulled out a whiteboard in order to organize all of this information.
"Iceland said that they met when they were hiding from his brother. So… here's all the nations I could think of that are male and that have male siblings!" Finland cheered, gesturing to the board. The list was as follows:
Romano
Italy
Hong Kong
China
Germany
Prussia
Canada
Japan
America
England
Scotland
Ireland
Wales
Australia
New Zealand
Romania
Moldova
"But we need to narrow that list down even more," Norway pointed out. "Many of the people on that list are already in other relationships."
"Oh, okay. Here, let's cross out the ones that are taken," Finland responded, erasing some of the names. When he was done, the list looked like this:
Hong Kong
Scotland
Ireland
Wales
Australia
New Zealand
Romania
Moldova
"My money's on Romania. Iceland said that he and his boyfriend dressed similarly," Finland added, smiling proudly.
"Hm… this is much better than what we had before. May I see the picture you took?" Norway asked. Finland handed Norway his phone. After scrutinizing it for a few minutes, Norway shook his head.
"I think this list is as good as we've got at the moment. Without knowing exactly what Iceland was staring at, this picture doesn't do much. Any ideas on how to narrow down this list?"
"I have an idea. I'm not gonna go through with it until I get your permission, though, Norge," Denmark spoke. Norway shot him a suspicious glance.
"On a scale of 1 to 10, how much am I going to regret this?"
STAGE THREE: DENMARK
Denmark's plan was also simple, yet it could potentially be pretty dangerous. After all, poor Ice had never been exposed to it before, so who knew how he would react? Even with Denmark there to protect him (for the most part), who knew what could happen?
Of course, Denmark's plan was to get Iceland drunk and have him spill the secret that way.
Surprisingly, Norway did give his permission for this plan. Well, as long as three conditions were met.
One, nothing stronger than beer, and no more than five beers MAXIMUM. Preferably closer to three. Denmark agreed to this one without an argument. Beer itself was alcoholic enough; no need to give Ice the hard stuff. Two, keep an SOBER eye on him at ALL TIMES. Denmark had a plan for this one. He just needed to make a couple of calls. And three, have him home before 1 am. Denmark also agreed to this one without much of an argument.
So, with Norway's grudging permission, Denmark called his two best friends (aside from the Nordics) and told them about his plan.
"Vhat? Icey's got himself a boyfriend?" Prussia exclaimed in surprise when he was told.
"Ja, we know. We're trying to figure out who it is, and I need your help," Denmark explained. Prussia chuckled.
"Of course I'll help. Just tell me vhen und vhere," Prussia replied. Denmark told him, and Prussia agreed to be there before hanging up.
America took the news in his usual fashion.
"Dude! That's so rad! Are you experiencing the typical worried-parent syndrome?" he blurted as soon as Denmark told him about the situation.
"Nej, I'm not. Norway is though. That's why I need your help," Denmark responded.
"Any way I can help, dude! What do you need the hero to do?" America cheered. After Denmark told him the plan, the location, and the place, America assured him that he'd be there.
Denmark grinned. Two down, one to go. Now for the hard part.
"Hej, Icey! I was wondering if you'd like to come out with me and my friends," Denmark asked, sticking his head into Iceland's room.
Iceland gave him a suspicious look. "You're trying to find out who my boyfriend is, aren't you?"
"Nej, nothing like that! I just thought you might want to have some fun!" Denmark lied.
"Okay. When are we leaving?" Iceland replied. Denmark smirked. Score!
"In an hour or so. I'll come get you when it's time."
Iceland nodded in agreement, and Denmark went to go in search of his wallet.
An hour and a half later, Denmark was walking into the bar with Iceland in tow. America and Prussia had already claimed their usual booth, and waved them over.
"Hey man! You're here!" America cheered, hugging Denmark as he sat down.
"Ja, ve vere starting to get vorried, Matthias," Prussia added, smirking.
Denmark laughed and rolled his eyes. "Gil, Al, when have I ever ditched bar night?"
"Once, for Lukas," America shot back with his Cheshire cat grin. Denmark slapped his shoulder. Iceland squirmed in his seat, looking uncomfortable.
"Well! Let's get this party started!" Denmark shouted, jumping up and going to get beer.
Two hours later found Iceland roaring drunk after three beers and America, Denmark, and Prussia mostly sober.
"How ya doing, Emil? Do you need to leave?" Denmark asked. Iceland shook his head drowsily.
"No, no, I'm fine. I'm just gonna go… find a bathroom."
"I'll come with you, kiddo," America offered, standing up. Iceland grudgingly accepted the help, and staggered off to the restroom with America guiding him.
"Vell, step one ist complete. Vhat now?" Prussia spoke up. Denmark grinned.
"Now, we wait and let Alfred work his magic. Trust me, Iceland will give up his boyfriend's identity any minute now."
Three minutes later, America stalked back to the table with Iceland in tow.
"We need to leave right now," America reported, grabbing his wallet and heading for the exit. Denmark and Prussia exchanged confused looks, but followed him anyway.
"Vhy? Vhat happened?" Prussia asked.
"Emil started hitting on an Asian guy, and now that guy's girlfriend is hunting us down to kill us," America reported, glancing over his shoulder. Denmark and Prussia's eyes bugged out. Iceland had done what?!
"So, Iceland's boyfriend is probably Asian," Denmark finished his report. Everyone glanced at the board with the list of possible boyfriends.
"That leaves us with Hong Kong. Anyone have any bright ideas on how to prove this?" Finland piped up. Norway pursed his lips thoughtfully.
"I have a way. It's going to require calling in a lot of favours, but I can manage it."
"What is it?" Denmark, Sweden, and Finland chorused, staring at Norway with wide eyes.
"I'm going to have to talk to Hong Kong's former caretaker, England."
STAGE FOUR: NORWAY
"Hong Kong might be doing WHAT?!" England's voice sputtered from the phone.
"Hong Kong might be dating Iceland, and I need you to call him and see if it's true," Norway explained again. England sighed in exasperation.
"Hong Kong's always been a stubborn boy. He may not tell me anything," England warned.
"I know. But could you please try?" Norway was almost to the point of begging.
"No guarantees, but yes," England answered before hanging up. Norway sighed and turned his phone off. Let's hope that England could get Hong Kong to talk.
Three hours later, England called back. Before Norway even had a chance to offer a greeting, England was speaking.
"Iceland and Hong Kong are dating. He was wondering if he could come over for dinner next week to get to know you and Denmark," England reported. Norway released a breath. Finally, all of the secrecy was over.
"Of course. I'd love to have him over," Norway replied. "Thank you for doing this, England."
"Anything for one of my friends. Now I've got to go, France just finished dinner," England answered, hanging up. Norway grinned. Oh, just wait until he shared this news with the rest of the Nordics…
"HONG KONG?!" Finland screeched. Norway flinched and pulled the phone away from his ear.
"Yes, Hong Kong. I figured you should know that he's coming over for dinner next week as well," Norway sighed.
"I'll be there!" Finland exclaimed. Sweden quickly took the phone, thanked Norway for calling, and promptly hung up.
"So, should we go talk to Ice?" Denmark asked, wrapping his arms around Norway's waist.
"Ja, we should," Norway murmured, untangling himself from Denmark and heading for the stairs.
Iceland took it pretty well, all things considered. Sure, he was pissed that Denmark and Norway had gone behind his back, but he was thrilled that they weren't mad, and that they'd even invited Hong Kong over for dinner. After they were done talking, they hugged it out.
"Now, please, no more secrets, okay Iceland?" Norway whispered.
"I'll try, stóri bróðir," Iceland murmured back.
Yes, the Nordics really were just like any other family. They fought, they shared embarrassing stories, they kept secrets from each other. But above all, they worried about each other. And when all else failed, they would always be there for each other. Especially when Iceland's boyfriend came to dinner. But that's a story for another day.
A/N: That's all for now, folks! Let me know if you want a sequel! For now, this is Neah, signing off!