Note: For a while I wasn't sure if I'd actually post this or if I'd just rework the first part and leave it as a one-shot, but the title comes from this part so it had to stay. I can already hear the confusion: "But Mnemosyne's Elegy/Mnemosyne/Elegy/M.E./hey-you-author-girl-with-the-unpronounceable-pen-name, why would you write something weird like this that doesn't have anything to do with the prompt? And when you were actually doing surprisingly well at keeping the boys close to canon in the first part too..." To which I say: Bah, have you seen what canon has been giving us lately? -smh- But in all seriousness, I felt like writing something a little different and sometimes I get oddball ideas out of nowhere :)

Natsu wasn't exactly sure what had woken him up, but he was definitely awake now. Taking a second to stare blearily up at the ceiling, he quickly ran over the previous day's events in his head until he got his bearings and figured out what he was doing in this unfamiliar room. That was right, he'd followed Gray all the way up to Isvan. And a hellish trip that had been.

He sat up and swept his gaze across the shadowy room, his keen eyes squinting in an attempt to pierce through the darkness and figure out what had woken him. Nothing moved or made a sound other than Lyon breathing softly in his sleep over by the other wall. Gray, however, was nowhere to be seen.

Natsu didn't know if Gray getting up was what had dragged him out of his slumber or if it had been something else entirely, but he was fairly certain that his friend wasn't expecting to be disturbed. Therefore, he could happily go back to sleep, no harm done. He entertained this fantasy for a few seconds before sighing and standing up, careful to be quiet so as not to wake Lyon. After how clearly upset Gray had been earlier, maybe it wasn't such a great idea to leave him alone to brood. And yes, maybe Natsu was a teensy bit curious about what he might be doing so late at night. One of these days that curiosity of his was going to get him into trouble.

But for now he just tiptoed across the room, wincing every time a floorboard squeaked under his foot or he bumped into something. Since the cabin was small, it took him all of about two minutes to ascertain that Gray was not inside at all. Fantastic. Well, this would be a great time to go back to sleep. It's not like Gray would ever know that anyone had realized he'd left, so Natsu could just play dumb tomorrow like nothing had happened. After all, he had no intention of going outside at night in these frigid conditions

Cursing quietly under his breath, he crept over to the door to retrieve Gray's coat from where it was still hanging on a hook on the wall—of course the idiot had gone wandering out in arctic temperatures without a jacket—and tugged the garment on grumpily. Sadly, he actually did have a functioning conscience, contrary to popular belief. Gray might never know that he had chosen to leave him alone on a night like this, but Natsu would know and it might bother him for all of about half a day before he happily forgot about it. He'd risk venturing out in the cold to avoid half a day of regret.

Slipping outside, he closed the door quietly behind him and grimaced as a gust of icy wind swept past him. And he'd thought it was cold earlier. Ha. He quickly calculated that half a day of regret was worth about three minutes of this frozen hell. If he didn't find Gray in three minutes then it would be bedtime again.

Natsu pulled the borrowed jacket around himself more tightly and set forth with grim determination, the snow crunching quietly under his feet as he trudged onward. He was just about to give up and call it a night when he almost tripped right over Gray. Hissing in surprise, he quickly jerked back, his foot coming down half an inch to the side of his friend's head.

"What the hell are you doing?" he sputtered, scowling down at Gray and wondering how he could possibly think it was a good idea to lay flat on his back in a snowbank in the middle of the arctic night without even a jacket. "You're going to get sick and die, and I'm going to laugh at your funeral since you were dumb enough to get yourself killed by hypo–hypo–"

"Hypothermia?" Gray suggested helpfully, making no move to get up.

"It would be pretty pathetic for an ice mage to die of hypo–whatever." Natsu nudged him with his foot. "You know, you can just as easily stare at nothing inside as outside."

"Yes." Gray sighed and kept his eyes resolutely fixed on what appeared to be nothing in particular. "If I was staring at nothing then that would be true."

Natsu frowned and tilted his head upward, trying to figure out what he could possibly be looking at. "What, the stars?"

"Mhm."

"Never took you for a stargazer." He prodded at Gray with his foot again, but his friend just swatted it away irritably. "Come on, it's freezing out here. You can look at the stars some other time."

"Go back inside before you freeze whatever few brain cells you have left," Gray said, the amusement in his voice not quite disguising the underlying melancholy. "I'll come in when I feel like it."

Natsu hesitated, trying to figure out the best course of action. Then he sighed and moved over to Gray's side so that he could settle himself down in the snow next to the other mage. Wincing as the icy wetness immediately began to seep through his clothing and chill his skin, he decided that this benevolent act would count as his good deed for the year. He could already tell that this was going to take longer than three minutes.

Gray sighed again. "It would be pretty pathetic for a fire mage to die of hypothermia too. Go back to bed, Natsu. I don't need company."

"Maybe not, but you look like you could use some anyway," Natsu said, vainly trying to ignore the arctic conditions. "So, why stars?"

Gray turned his head to the side to study the dragon slayer silently for a few moments, but either he thought this was a fight he couldn't win or he needed the company more than he let on, because he just looked back up at the sky again with a faint frown.

"When I was a kid, I had trouble sleeping," he said after a few seconds. "Either my thoughts would keep me up or I wouldn't want to go back to sleep after the nightmares woke me up. And let me tell you, it gets really boring staring at the ceiling night after night, so eventually I started coming outside instead.

"Before I figured out where all the creaky boards were, I accidentally woke Ur up a couple times. Sometimes she'd follow me out, but she knew that I didn't want to talk about…everything…so she started teaching me about the stars and constellations instead. I was a fast learner because I needed something to take my mind off things and that did the trick. I think she knew that. Sounds strange, but I know an awful lot about stars, believe it or not."

"Oh…"

Natsu wasn't sure what to make of that. Yeah, the star thing was unexpected and kind of sad. It did, at least, explain what Gray was doing out here in the middle of the night. Maybe it wasn't surprising that he was recreating something that he had shared with his master, so close to the anniversary of her death. Natsu wasn't sure if this made his presence here better or worse. He was obviously the wrong person for this and he couldn't replace the person who should be here, but maybe he was still better than nothing.

"I haven't been back here in a long time," Gray said quietly, "and I don't know if I'll ever come back again. So I want to do this here one last time, just for tonight. Yes, I can look at the stars anywhere else too, but it's not the same."

Natsu stayed quiet for a moment. "They all kind of look the same to me."

"They all looked the same to me too, at first," Gray said with a tired laugh. "And none of the constellations look like what they're named after. But I certainly don't have the patience to teach you. You'd make a terrible student."

"Did I ask you to teach me?" Natsu huffed, rolling his eyes. "You'd be better off talking stars with Lucy. You should've told her about this and you two would have hit it off right away."

Gray shook his head slightly. "It's really…personal. It's not something I go around sharing."

Natsu bit his tongue, still not quite sure what to make of the fact that he was sharing this now. If he'd caught Gray at any other time, he doubted he would have ever learned any of this. He just hoped that his friend didn't end up regretting it once he returned to a more normal mood.

"Because of Ur?" he suggested.

"Not exactly."

"Then why?"

"Because…" Gray's voice trailed off, fading to nothing in the silence of the night, and Natsu had the momentary feeling that he wouldn't answer. "Have you ever heard those people who say that their dead loved ones look down on them from the stars or sky or whatever? I don't know if they actually believe it or if it's just supposed to be a pretty metaphor."

Natsu stared at him blankly. "You think that dead people are watching you from stars?"

Then he winced, belatedly realizing that maybe he should be more tactful about what he said while his friend was like this. Even if the idea still seemed kind of dumb to him.

"Of course not," Gray said dismissively. "It's not that. But… God, this is going to sound silly. When I was a kid, I went through and picked out certain stars for everyone who was important to me, both alive and dead. And it was a habit I never really shook—I still end up choosing stars for everyone I care about. It's not that I think they're actually up on those stars or whatever. It's just…a reminder, I guess."

"A reminder of what?"

"Of… Well, if I'm out here looking at the stars, it usually means that something's bothering me, you know? It's really easy to get lost in the pain and forget everything else. So the stars I chose are kind of like a reminder of everything I've lost, but in a less morbid, more optimistic way. But they're also a reminder of everything I still have, of all the people that are still here, because sometimes it's easy to forget about all the good I've still got left. And it helps put things into perspective. The loss seems so big and consuming, but I look up and see that it's really only a few small pinpricks against all the rest. I know, I know, it sounds totally lame, but I started it as a kid and just never let it go."

'Lame' wasn't the word Natsu would use, actually. It was a little odd, definitely something he wouldn't have expected from Gray of all people, but it was strangely sweet and obviously meaningful.

"So…you have stars for everyone important?"

"Yeah."

"Fairy Tail?"

Gray huffed out a soft laugh and pointed at a spot in the sky. Natsu couldn't honestly tell which particular star his friend was indicating—they all looked exactly the same and there were so many—but he kept his mouth shut.

"That one is Erza's. It's part of the Phoenix, because nothing can keep her down and she can always overcome the odds even when everything seems lost. She's good at not giving up hope so that she can rebuild anything that's been burned down and rise from the ashes." His finger traced across the sky, coming to rest on another star. "That one is Lucy's. Hers is in Virgo."

"Whoa," Natsu interrupted before he thought better of it. "That weird, masochistic girl?"

"It has nothing to do with the spirit," Gray grumbled. "And anyway, it was a sort of tongue-in-cheek choice, to be honest. Lucy has the outer appearance of a silly girl, or maiden, in this case, but she's tougher than she looks and there's more to her than meets the eye."

Natsu eyed him curiously. He was a little surprised at how much thought Gray had put into this, but maybe that was what made it so meaningful.

"Do I have a star too?"

"Of course."

"What constellation am I? Something really cool, right?"

Gray's face lit up with a beatific smile, softened even further in the moonlight. His finger travelled several inches away from Lucy's star.

"That's yours. It's part of Lacerta."

Natsu racked his brain, but he barely even knew the most well-known constellations. "What's that? Something really powerful, yeah? Ooh! A dragon?"

Gray's smile widened. "The lizard."

Natsu stared at him blankly. "…What?"

"Well, a lizard is kind of like a really wimpy dragon, right?" Gray asked, snickering.

"What?"

"Look, I picked it out way back when we hadn't known each other for long and I still hadn't gotten used to your annoyingness. You can't possibly have forgotten that our friendship had a rocky start."

"Why give me a star at all if we weren't even friends yet?" Natsu muttered mutinously, still smarting from the lizard slight. "I thought they were only for important people."

"Yeah." Gray let his arm fall back down to rest across his stomach as he frowned up at the star thoughtfully. "And I wasn't very good at getting along with people back then. But you were still part of the guild and I was finally starting to dislike you less and I thought that…I don't know. I guess I just thought that maybe it would be nice if we were friends, so I picked out a star as a reminder that one day I wanted you to be someone important enough to me to have a place up there."

Natsu's glower slowly faded away, along with most of his irritation, as he tried to bore a hole into Gray's skull with his eyes. It was kind of weird to think of that same angry little kid who seemed to hate everybody also having a side like this. But it was also a little humbling, just thinking about the chance Gray had extended to someone he hadn't even seemed to like much, and all the effort he must have put in to make things work out.

Natsu cleared his throat. "But a lizard?"

The corners of Gray's lips twitched upwards. "It was really, really satisfying, especially when you were at your most irritating. Actually, it's still pretty damn satisfying."

"Can't I get a new star? There has to be something cooler out there. Is there like a dragon or something? I wanna be a dragon."

"You can't just switch stars," Gray protested, scandalized. "I pick them all for a reason, and there's too much meaning to just throw it out. Although yes, there's a dragon. But someone's already got Draco and I don't like to double-up on constellations unless I run out of good ones or there's a really good reason for it."

"Wait, you gave someone else the dragon?" Natsu demanded. "Who is possibly more dragon-y than me? It had better not be Gajeel. I'm a way better dragon slayer than him!"

Gray shifted uncomfortably in the snow, a reluctant look spreading across his face. "Not Gajeel."

"Then who?"

Gray just shrugged halfheartedly, clearly not enthusiastic about sharing. But whatever reservations Natsu might have about pushing him on a night like this were eclipsed by the pressing need to know just who had stolen his rightful constellation.

"Who?" he repeated.

Gray sighed, but slowly lifted his arm again to point at some nondescript patch of sky. "That one is Igneel's."

Natsu started in surprise, wondering what he had just misheard. "Excuse me?"

"I know, I know, it's not really my place." Gray's gaze drifted as far away from Natsu as it possibly could without the ice mage actually turning around. "I mean, I never met him and he's not an important person to me. But he's a really important person to you and I went with you on some of your quests to search for him and… I don't know. He was important to you and you were important to me, and I guess I thought that if you didn't have a reminder in the stars for him then I'd keep one for you."

A melancholy smile ghosted over his face as he lifted his arm once more to trace over what Natsu could only assume was a constellation. "Big lizard," he murmured. He moved his hand off to the side and traced another shape. "Little lizard."

When Natsu finally remembered how to breathe again, he sucked in a lungful of air and stared at Gray with wide eyes. That was… He swallowed hard past the lump in his throat and Gray stayed silent, still looking uncomfortable as if he was half-expecting Natsu to call him out on overstepping his boundaries.

"Can you show me again?" the dragon slayer asked finally, his voice smaller than he wanted it to be.

Gray turned his head just enough to finally look at him, and studied him uncertainly for a moment. Then he nodded and traced out the constellation again, emphasizing Igneel's particular star.

"I'll never remember that," Natsu said with a sigh.

"Stars are my thing, not yours." Gray smiled a little and reached over to tug at Natsu's scarf gently. "You've already got your own reminder, haven't you?"

"Yeah," Natsu mumbled, unconsciously reaching up to wrap his fingers around the scarf and adjust it more securely against the chill night air. He cleared his throat. "But I think you meant to say 'big dragon, little dragon'."

Gray smirked. "Big dragon, little lizard."

Natsu groaned in defeat but didn't push it. He couldn't really be irritated about the lizard thing anymore, not after this.

"Oh, and there's Happy's star in Pisces," Gray added, clearly ready to get out of awkward waters.

"Pisces?"

Gray rolled his eyes. "The fishes."

Natsu couldn't help but laugh. "Man, he'd love that. Fish."

"Yeah, I thought so too," Gray said, smiling a little.

"Better than a lizard."

"Whatever."

"Hey, what about Lyon?" Natsu asked, remembering the other mage still asleep in the cabin.

Gray groaned, immediately looking embarrassed again. "Yeah, he's got one too," he muttered noncommittally.

"Where?" Natsu asked, a predatory smirk easing across his face. He had a feeling there was a good story here.

Gray reluctantly pointed upwards. "That one."

"And what constellation might that be?" the dragon slayer asked when his friend made no move to elaborate.

"Gemini," Gray grumbled, after a long pause. He rubbed his hand across his face. "The twins."

"Whoa, does he have a secret twin? Oh crap, I don't think I can deal with more than one of him."

"No, he doesn't have a twin." Gray rolled his eyes and poked at the snowbank beside him with sudden interest.

"So why did you pick it then?"

"It's stupid," he muttered.

"So are you," Natsu replied cheerfully. "But you might as well tell me, because now I'm curious and I'll bother you until you do."

"I was just a kid," Gray said defensively. "Kids think silly things."

"Uh-huh…"

He sighed in defeat. "It took me a while to warm up to him, but eventually I started seeing him as something like family. He was kind of like that annoying big brother I'd never had."

Natsu blinked at him blankly for a second and then smiled a little. "I bet he'd love to hear that."

"Maybe there was a time way back as kids when he would have wanted that, but I never told him then," Gray said moodily. "And God knows I was too stubborn to really show it either. And then things changed, and it's not the same anymore. It doesn't matter now. It's silly."

"I wouldn't call it silly," Natsu said honestly. He grinned. "Cute, maybe."

Gray scowled. "I'm not cute."

"Aw, it's so cute how you just want to be family but you're too scared to tell him except through stars," Natsu cooed, before sobering a little. "He's here now, you know. Whatever you didn't say then, you can say now."

"It was a long time ago, and things are different. It's too late."

"Of course it's not too late. He's not dead, is he?" Natsu immediately winced, regretting that he had brought up the subject of death so flippantly, given the occasion.

Gray stayed quiet for a moment, but then pointed at the sky again. "That one right there, Polaris, the North Star, is Ur's," he said quietly. "It's a guiding star, you know? The one you can use to navigate and all that. She's been leading me for most of my life. At first it was just that her death was a defining moment for me, pushed me to take certain paths and haunted me with the guilt, but even now I still use all those things she taught me to show me the way. I've spent half my life chasing after her, and the other half running away even though I knew I couldn't escape. But in the end, no matter how far I run, she always guides me back."

Natsu swallowed hard. "Gray–"

"Those are my parents' stars. And over there I have stars for all the people I knew back in my hometown, before Deliora destroyed it. I was just a kid and it's been so long that I can't remember all of their faces anymore, can't remember all of their names, even. I just have little snatches of things—a name or the sound of a voice or a glimpse of the face of a child who never got to grow up. But they've still got stars because they were my friends once, even if I only half-remember some of them. So many stars."

He sighed heavily. "No matter what else I've forgotten, I keep reminders so that I can't forget entirely. It's not all bad. Sometimes it feels good—or cleansing, at least—to remember everyone who's gone too, because I still loved them. Love them. And all the rest are here to remind me that I'm not alone and I've still got a lot to be thankful for. Maybe it seems silly, but sometimes I need that reminder."

The two friends stared upwards in silence for what felt like an eternity. Natsu didn't know what to say to that and suspected that maybe Gray didn't really want a reply at all, but he had to say something.

"And where is your star?" he asked finally, shattering the stillness.

"My star? Why would I need a star? Do you really think I need a reminder for myself?"

"I don't know." He shrugged. "Sometimes that's the most important reminder of all, isn't it? To remind you of yourself and all the good in you too. And it seems kind of sad that you have a whole sky full of the people you care about, but you aren't up there with them."

Gray stared at him and, as the silence dragged on, Natsu suddenly realized exactly how stupid he sounded. He was glad that it was dark because he could feel himself flush, his face heating up despite the chill.

"Forget it, I–"

"Shh." Gray looked upwards again, his brow crinkling in concentration as he searched the sky. After a couple minutes, he pointed at something or other. "That one."

Natsu gazed up at the sea of twinkling lights, finally feeling that vague sense of awe that he supposed Gray must feel. "Which constellation?"

Gray studied his star with a calculating look. "Cygnus."

Natsu wanted to ask which one Cygnus was and why he had chosen it, but Gray stood up suddenly, brushing snow off his clothing.

"We should go in." He quirked an eyebrow and smirked lazily at Natsu. "Before we get sick and die of 'hypo–whatever'."

Natsu rolled his eyes and gratefully jumped to his feet, tugging the coat closer as if that could stop his shivering or the chattering of his teeth. "Please."

Gray laughed and headed back for the cabin.

"You've had enough stars for tonight?" Natsu asked cautiously, before his friend opened the door.

"Yeah." Gray sighed and smiled tiredly. "It's enough for now. Sometimes I get more important, and annoying, reminders than stars. I'll go to sleep, if that's what you're worried about."

Natsu smiled a little. "Goodnight, then."

"Goodnight."

They slipped back inside quietly and Natsu quickly slithered underneath his blanket and snuggled into it as much as he could in an attempt to overcome the damp chill. Something came whizzing through the air and whacked him in the face, and he had to muffle a startled yelp before realizing that it was just a blanket. Gray must've found an extra for him. Natsu pulled that one over himself too and settled down to sleep, although the night's conversation seemed to play over and over again in his mind. But eventually exhaustion won out and he slipped into sleep.

Normally Natsu didn't mind mornings, but he was tired after such a late night and really just wanted to roll over and go back to sleep as soon as he woke up. Instead, he reluctantly abandoned the relative warmth of his blankets and grimaced as the cool air hit his skin. Gray was still sleeping over on the other side of the room, and Natsu rolled his eyes as he realized that his friend didn't even have a blanket. Apparently he hadn't found an extra blanket last night at all, but had given Natsu his own. Ice mage or not, that seemed kind of dumb after lying out in the snow.

The dragon slayer returned one of the blankets to Gray, briefly considering waking him up but quickly dismissing the idea. He had been able to tell from Gray's breathing that he had still been awake by the time Natsu fell asleep last night, so he could probably use a few more minutes of rest.

Natsu headed for the kitchen to scrounge for breakfast, keeping an eye out for Lyon, who was obviously already awake. Sure enough, the older mage was seated at the kitchen table, reading through a sheaf of papers as he absently sipped at the contents of a mug.

"I'm surprised you're awake so early," he said without looking up. "You had a late night."

Natsu started in surprise. "What? Did he wake you up leaving?"

"You woke me up. You must have stepped on every squeaky board and bumped into every piece of furniture on your way out."

"Oh… Sorry."

Lyon shrugged. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised. Gray used to go out a lot at night when he couldn't sleep. He woke me up a couple times too. I'd always wait up for him to make sure he came back."

Natsu eyed the other man, wondering once again what exactly he wanted from Gray now. The disconnect between the person on Galuna and the person here now and from the childhood stories was jarring, and Natsu wasn't sure what to make of it.

Shrugging it off, he drifted over to the stove where there was a kettle on the heat, drawn by the promise of something potentially edible. The brown color and bitter scent suggested strong coffee, which was probably exactly what he needed right now.

"The mugs next to the stove are clean," Lyon said. "You can use one if you want."

"Thanks." Natsu grabbed one of the indicated mugs and poured his drink into it, before sitting down at the table across from the other mage. He took a sip and immediately spit it back out as an odd flavor assailed his tongue, something bitter and burnt and unpleasant. "What the hell kind of coffee is this?" he sputtered, glowering at the drink in disgust.

"It's not coffee," Lyon snapped, scowling at him indignantly. "It's hot chocolate."

"Hot chocolate? There's nothing chocolate about this!"

"I like to use dark chocolate," Lyon said, turning his nose up as he gave Natsu a contemptuous look. "It's not as sweet as what you might be used to."

"I don't think that's the problem," Natsu grumbled. Either there was no chocolate in the drink at all, or the other man had somehow managed to destroy its flavor beyond all recognition. But it was probably better not to pick a fight, so he just pushed the mug away and dropped the subject. "Whatcha reading?"

Lyon eyed him suspiciously for a moment longer before shrugging. "Just some reports and things. I have some business to take care of up here once Gray wakes up and you two leave."

Natsu was pretty sure that Gray wouldn't want him to share anything that had happened last night, but he still had serious questions about Lyon's motives and future intentions.

"And when we go our separate ways, what are your plans for the future where Gray is concerned?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that I have no idea why you suddenly contacted him and aren't acting like a jerk after everything you pulled on Galuna, and I want to know if that's a permanent change or if you're just going to disappear and never show up again."

Lyon's gaze dropped to the tabletop and he frowned at it unseeingly. "I don't know. I haven't decided yet."

Gray would be super pissed if he ever found out that Natsu had done this, but…

"Did you know that he has a thing for stars?" the dragon slayer asked conversationally.

"Uh… No?"

"Apparently he knows a lot about stars. As a kid he even picked out individual stars for everyone he cared about, and the constellation they're in says something about the person. He uses them as reminders of the things he cares about."

"That's what he kept doing at night?" Lyon sighed and rubbed at his face. "I wouldn't have expected it of him, but he was always kind of a mystery."

Natsu kept his voice casual, but watched the older mage carefully to gauge his reaction and to decide how far to take this. "His star for you is in Gemini."

Lyon frowned. "The twins? Why? I don't have a twin."

"Oh, you don't?" Natsu asked casually. "I don't suppose you have a brother either?"

"Huh? Of course I don't–" Lyon broke off, eyes widening slightly as he glanced towards the other room where Gray was still sleeping. "Oh."

"He seems to think that it's too late, but I suppose that's up to you, isn't it?" Natsu's feigned nonchalance melted away and he gave Lyon a hard look. "Figure out what you want from him and where you want to go from here. Don't lead him on if you're not planning to stick around."

Lyon stayed quiet. He gazed at the empty doorway a little longer before picking up his mug and swirling its contents around slowly as he stared down at them blankly.

"I'll think about it," he said finally. "I don't know exactly where we should go from here yet, but I'll think about it."

It wasn't a real answer, but it was better than nothing. If nothing else, he was at least aware of the situation now and had a better understanding of how important his next move would be. Natsu wasn't really surprised that he'd need some time to decide what to do. After all, Gray and Lyon's relationship was rather uncertain right now and they still had some things they'd need to work out.

In the meantime, Natsu was dying to figure out the answer to another question entirely. He was even getting desperate enough to ask Lyon for advice since he clearly wouldn't be able to figure it out on his own and Gray wasn't offering any help.

"So, it seems like the only person he didn't have a star for was himself," he added, ignoring Lyon's look of exasperation at the constant jumping about. "I said he should pick one so he did, except he didn't tell me what the constellation was besides the name, and I want to know because it could be important. I think it started with an 's'. Sig…sig…signal? No, that's dumb. Sigmus? Wait, I think it was actually signus."

"Cygnus?" Lyon suggested dryly.

"That's what I said."

"It starts with a 'c', not an 's'."

"Whatever." Natsu narrowed his eyes at the other man. "You know what it is then? What, you're a star expert too?"

"Hardly. I'm not even entirely sure that Cygnus is a constellation, but that sounded like what you were trying to say."

"Wait, so you don't know what it means?"

"It means 'swan'," Lyon said impatiently. "Like how a baby swan is called a cygnet."

Natsu stared at him blankly. "I thought a baby swan was a swanling." Lyon threw him a disbelieving look, and the dragon slayer hurried to defend himself. "You know, a baby duck is a duckling, a baby swan is a swanling?"

"…You have got to be kidding me."

Natsu was not, in fact, kidding. It seemed like a perfectly sound leap of logic to him, but then again, logic had never been his strong suit. Whatever the case, he'd rather talk about what Gray's choice of star might mean rather than about his apparent stupidity.

"So, why would he pick a swan?"

Lyon shrugged. "I have no idea."

Real helpful, this guy.

"Um… He likes swans?" Natsu suggested. Lyon raised an eyebrow scornfully, and the dragon slayer tried again. "Or he's actually a closet birdwatcher along with all this secret stargazing stuff?"

"…Right." Lyon shook his head in weary exasperation. "I doubt it's going to be anything that simple. Gray might act dumb most of the time, but he's a lot smarter than he lets on. If he was looking for something with meaning then it would actually be something meaningful. Think more abstractly."

Natsu sighed. He much preferred simple things. Meaning and abstractness almost always flew right over his head.

"A swan is…white?" His face lit up. "Like ice!"

"Ice isn't white, you fool."

"A swan is white like snow?"

"…I don't even know what to say to you right now."

Natsu scowled. "Well maybe if you'd stop making fun of me and actually help…"

"I already said I don't know. It's much easier to see how stupid all your ideas are."

"Hey, at least I came up with ideas. Now it's your turn."

Lyon stayed quiet for a long moment, his brow wrinkled in thought. "Swans…fly?" he said uncertainly.

"Ha, and you say my ideas are stupid!" Natsu crowed. "Gray can't fly."

"Of course not." Lyon glowered at him in exasperation. "Not literally. But it could be…symbolic."

"Symbolic of what?"

"Um, well, flight sometimes symbolizes…freedom?"

"I dunno, seems weird." Natsu sighed. "I suck at all this symbolism and meaning and crap."

"I'd noticed that, actually."

"You aren't doing so great either."

"I want to say that you two are so far off the mark that it isn't even funny, but that would be a lie," Gray said, snickering. Natsu and Lyon both started in surprise, somehow having missed the fact that the object of their discussion had made it all the way across the kitchen to peer doubtfully at the kettle without being noticed. "It's still pretty funny."

"Gray, you're awake!" Natsu said stupidly.

Then he winced, realizing that Gray now knew he'd been sharing the whole star thing. Surprisingly, his friend seemed more amused than upset right now, but that could definitely change.

"So I am," Gray said dryly, pouring himself a mug of so-called hot chocolate. Natsu thought about warning him, but he already seemed wary of the liquid and only took a hesitant sip before scrunching his face up in disgust. "It's been a decade and you still haven't learned how to make hot chocolate properly?"

"I use dark chocolate," Lyon grumbled, glowering at both Gray and Natsu.

"I do too, sometimes," Gray replied, unimpressed. "But at least I can still tell that it's chocolate. This tastes like really bad coffee or something."

Natsu started snickering, until Lyon shot him an extra-venomous look. He might have still snickered some more anyway, but he was still focused on the swan thing and didn't want to be distracted despite Gray's best efforts.

"So, why a swan?"

Gray stared at him silently, face unreadable, before sighing and dumping the rest of the 'hot chocolate' down the sink. "Have you ever heard that dumb kids' story about the ugly duckling?"

"…What?" Whatever Natsu had been expecting his friend to say, it had not been that. "No."

"Really?" Gray arched an eyebrow and smirked. "Everyone knows that one."

"I was raised by a dragon," Natsu huffed, crossing his arms. "I heard way cooler stories than ones about ducks."

Gray snorted. "Well, it's not my job to educate you. Anyway, there are a couple things I want to do while I'm up here, in case I don't come back. Give me a few minutes to take care of them and then we can go."

Without waiting for Natsu or Lyon to say anything else, he headed for the door. Pausing, he turned back to give the dragon slayer one last look.

"Oh, and Natsu?"

"Huh?"

"That whole star thing? I'd prefer it if it stays between you and me. You caught me at a bad time, yeah? Don't make me regret telling you." His tone was casual, maybe even faintly amused, but there was just enough steel in his eyes to let Natsu know that he was serious.

"Yeah," Natsu mumbled, dropping his gaze. "Sorry."

"Well, I'll be back shortly," Gray said cheerfully, disappearing through the doorway. A moment later, they heard the front door open and shut.

The two remaining mages stared at the empty doorway for a few seconds before looking at each other again.

"So… Do you know the duck story?" Natsu asked finally.

"Did you miss what he just said?"

Natsu waved off the older mage's concern. "He doesn't want me sharing this stuff with anyone else, but he knows that I already told you so I'm sure he expects us to keep discussing it. If he was that against it, he wouldn't have given us a clue."

Lyon hesitated a little longer before sighing and giving in. "It's a story about this duckling who's, well, ugly. He doesn't look like the other ducklings so he gets teased and picked on a lot and his life pretty much sucks. But when he grows up, it turns out that he's actually a swan and the story makes a big deal about how he's now way cooler and prettier than the ducks."

Natsu waited to hear the rest of the story, but Lyon just stared at him and made no move to continue.

"Wait, that's it?" he asked in disbelief. Lyon nodded. "What a dumb story."

"Still, something about it must have meaning for Gray."

"All I got out of the story is that the swan was pretty. I don't know, maybe he can be kind of vain sometimes, but…"

"Have you ever heard the expression 'too dumb to live'?" Lyon asked, rolling his eyes.

Natsu spent a few seconds trying to figure out what that had to do with swans, before finally realizing what the older mage was talking about. "Hey!" he protested, scowling. "Why don't you come up with a better theory then?"

Lyon sighed and rubbed at his face wearily. "It's a transformative story. The whole point is the transformation from bad circumstances to good ones, through an internal shift. Do you remember Gray's reaction last night when I told him that he'd changed since he was a kid? My guess is that this is a representation of Gray's shift from being someone he didn't particularly like into someone he's prouder to be, or even just a reminder that he wants to continue to improve and hopes to be someone better in the future. It might embody other transformations too or be a reminder that he's finally found a place where he feels like he belongs, but I'd bet there's a definite internal element there."

Well, Natsu wouldn't have guessed that. He wouldn't admit it, but apparently Lyon was way better at all this symbolic crap. His theory was kind of sad, but maybe also kind of positive and hopeful because it pointed to a better present and future. Gray had said that the stars were reminders, and Natsu had suggested that he pick his own star to remind himself of, well, himself. If what Gray needed a reminder of was how far he had come and how far he still wanted to go… Well, maybe that wasn't such a bad thing.

"So, what do you think?" Natsu asked, arching an eyebrow. "You knew him as a kid. Ugly duckling or just a swanling? Cyg-thing. Whatever."

Lyon sighed, not even bothering to make a sarcastic comment. "He's far from perfect—he had problems then, and I'm sure he still has them now. But he was always a swan. I just hope that maybe he's finally starting to realize that."

Natsu hoped so too.

"I'm sorry I told Lyon about the stars," Natsu said, giving Gray a sidelong look as they sat in the station waiting for their train.

Gray just sighed and shrugged. "I should've known that if I didn't tell you what I meant, you'd go to him for help. You like sticking your nose into things. And let's be honest, you would have needed his help. I don't know or care what theories you came up with after I left, but I can almost guarantee that he was closer than you."

"Hey," Natsu protested halfheartedly. But it was true, so he let it go.

He kind of wanted to ask what Lyon had said when he'd pulled Gray aside just before they'd left, but he had the feeling that his friend would brush him off. Plus, he'd already been awfully nosy these past couple days and he didn't want to push his luck. He did hope that it had been something good though. He still wasn't entirely sure what he thought of Lyon, still found him kind of annoying and remembered what had transpired on Galuna, but he'd also seen a different side of him. And Gray might be happier if he could work things out with his one-time brother.

"That being said," Gray added, interrupting Natsu's thoughts, "I really would prefer it if this didn't leak out to anyone else. It's just… I don't know. I don't really want it being spread around."

"It's okay," Natsu said quickly. "I understand that. I can totally keep secrets."

Gray eyed him skeptically and he tried to look innocent. The ice mage just shrugged, his gaze wandering away again as he returned to studying their surroundings with that hungry yet melancholy intensity. Natsu had noticed it first when his friend had just arrived in Isvan yesterday, it had cropped up for a good portion of the time they had been here, and had been virtually nonexistent before arriving. It didn't take a genius to put two and two together. Which was good, since Natsu wasn't exactly a genius.

"Are you sure you don't want to stay longer?" he asked cautiously.

Gray pulled himself out of his reverie long enough to frown back over at Natsu. He stayed silent for a long moment before shaking his head.

"No, I don't want to stay. Yes, it was my home once and it will always be a special place to me, but there was enough heartache here that it hurts too. I want to be here, but I don't. There have definitely been times when I've missed it over the years, but I never came back until Lyon interfered. I might not have ever returned if he hadn't stepped in, honestly. Even when I miss it, it's really hard to convince myself to come back."

"If…if you ever wanted to come back, you could always ask me and I'd come with you. You know, if that would make it easier." Natsu flushed and shifted uncomfortably. "I mean, only if you want me to."

Gray stared at him silently for what seemed like an eternity, before clearing his throat and looking away. "Thank you."

It wasn't a real answer and Natsu knew that he would be too proud to ask for that kind of thing under normal circumstances, but this was, if nothing else, an acknowledgement. Hopefully if Gray really needed that company one day, he'd know that he could ask for it.

Not knowing what else to say, both mages stayed quiet, lost in their own thoughts. Thankfully the train arrived a few minutes later, before things got too uncomfortable.

"I never thought I'd say that I missed this, but this is definitely better than how I had to ride these trains on the way up here," Natsu remarked, sinking down into a seat next to Gray and mentally preparing himself for the coming torture.

"And just how did you ride the trains on the way up?"

"Well, I started off sitting on top, but I almost got scraped off onto the roof of a tunnel so I managed to find a luggage compartment to pass out in."

Gray laughed. "Oh man, I'd pay good money to see you riding around on the top of a train."

"Yeah, yeah. I–" Natsu broke off as the train lurched into motion and his stomach roiled uncomfortably. "Oh God," he groaned, "it never gets better."

Gray snickered a little bit but then left the dragon slayer to his nauseous daze, instead turning away to gaze out the window and watch the scenery of what had once been his home speed by. Natsu stayed lost in his own misery for several minutes before groggily wondering how Gray was actually doing. His friend had been acting normal enough to deflect suspicion, but it wouldn't be surprising if he was still upset. Natsu sucked at the whole comforting thing to start with and had an even harder time caring when his brain was mush and he was just trying not to puke everywhere, but he felt that maybe it was his duty as a friend to at least try.

"Hey Gray?" He paused as another wave of nausea hit him and Gray looked back over at him, smoothing his expression out as he wiped away any lingering traces of melancholy. "Are you, you know, okay?"

Gray blinked at him blankly for a moment before nodding. "Sure. If anyone's not fine, it's you. I think I can help with that actually, but I have something interesting to show you first. Look here."

He rummaged in his pocket and then held his hand up, fingers curled into a fist to hide whatever he was holding. Natsu had no idea what to expect, but unslouched a little to peer at his friend's hand uncertainly. As he uncurled himself from his huddled position, Gray's fist slammed into his solar plexus painfully and he only had the time to think 'sneaky bastard' before passing out.

When he stirred back to life sometime later, the train was still moving. His first thought was to get his friend back for pulling an Erza like that—sure, he was glad to have been passed out so that he didn't have to deal with the motion sickness, but that didn't mean that he wanted people going around punching him—but he paused and took a minute to watch Gray. The ice mage had slumped against the window, but although his eyes were closed, a couple silent tears stained his cheeks.

Natsu hesitated, but then reached out to touch his friend awkwardly on the shoulder. Gray started in surprise.

"What's up?" Natsu asked, subdued.

Gray swiped a hand across his eyes. "It's been a decade. You'd think that I would have found a way to really come to terms with things by now. I guess it's kind of pathetic that I'm still so screwed up, but it hurts anyway."

"I don't know, I think most everyone would have a hard time coming to terms with something like that," Natsu offered. "And that kind of thing leaves scars. I think it's normal that it still hurts sometimes. It might get better over time, but it doesn't go away completely."

Gray chuckled breathily, an unamused sound, and turned his face back towards the window. "It's not that it really gets better, exactly. People always say that it will get better or it won't hurt as much later. But you know, it's not that it hurts less, just that it hurts different. Some kinds of hurt are just easier to deal with than others. You learn to cope better, not to stop hurting."

Natsu considered that for a second. It was impossible to really think about such a statement in any real detail because his brain was still so foggy from the motion sickness, but he thought he might get the point. Igneel's disappearance had never really stopped hurting either, but the hurt had mellowed out a little over the years and Natsu had learned how to deal with it and push it aside most of the time so that it wasn't always on his mind. Maybe it wasn't that it hurt less, but that it had settled into a bone-deep ache instead of an acute agony. Not less, just different.

"I think she probably knew everything I never got to say," Gray whispered, his voice wavering slightly, "but I wish that I could have told her anyway."

"I'm sorry," Natsu said softly.

Gray looked back over and smiled a little, even though it didn't quite hide the pain. "I'm sorry too, flame brain."

Natsu opened his mouth to ask what he meant, but Gray's fist collided with his stomach again and he slipped into unconsciousness once more. Gray woke him when they reached the station, and Natsu was terribly excited until his friend reminded him that they were only halfway and still needed to catch a connecting train to reach the guild. Gray seemed cheerful enough, although Natsu had his doubts, and the two friends joked around and chatted about random things that had nothing at all to do with the past while they waited out their layover.

When they got back on the train Gray didn't bother knocking Natsu out again, so the dragon slayer spent the rest of the ride in hell. He glanced over at Gray occasionally when he wasn't too far gone to care, but his friend seemed perfectly fine. Gray had always been a good actor.

It was only when they reached Magnolia that he began to falter again. It was already dark, the train ride having taken all day, but Natsu's automatic assumption was that they'd stop by the guild to say hi and let everyone know that they were back. But Gray had picked up a strange reluctance almost as soon as he had stepped off the train, and his steps slowed to almost a crawl as he stared towards the guild unenthusiastically.

"Is everything okay?" Natsu asked, eyeing him.

Gray smiled wanly. "Yeah, it's fine. It just feels odd to be back here. Like, it was hard to go to Isvan, but it's almost just as hard to come back. It feels like I just stepped out of my normal life and took a break, like everything paused to give me time to take care of something that's part of an entirely different world. And now that I'm leaving that world and coming back to normalcy, it's almost just as jarring. I don't know that that actually makes any sense."

"Uh… We could always just go home tonight and show up at the guild tomorrow?" Natsu offered uncertainly.

Gray hesitated for a moment before shaking his head. "Nah, it's okay."

"If you're sure…"

"Stars are good reminders," Gray said, sighing and tilting his head to look up at the sky, "but they're nothing like the real thing. I said that I've spent most of my life chasing after Ur's star, and that's true. But you know, I'm always following after yours too—everyone from Fairy Tail. As long as I'm chasing them, I always know that they'll guide me right back to where I need to be. And right now, I really want to chase them."

He smiled faintly at Natsu before starting forward again, walking towards the guild at a brisk, purposeful pace. "Well, come on, flame brain. It's never too late for a good brawl, and I do believe that I owe you a fight."

Natsu hesitated, waiting almost until Gray had made it all the way to the end of the street. Then he smiled and took off running, his feet thudding loudly against the pavement in the still night air as he chased after his friend, following him back home.

Note: And you thought the title was just some weird metaphoric thing. ...Okay, it is some weird metaphoric thing, but there are actual stars too! Although I have to admit that I'm with Natsu on this one: I don't know anything about stars. I'm pretty sure that not all constellations can be seen at the same time in the same place, but that was more research than I was willing to do. And ha ha, ugly duckling. I'm half trolling you and half totally serious. And poor Lyon can never escape that hot chocolate thing—after "Stay" it kind of became a headcanon for me XD

emmahoshi: When Natsu said that Gray should have a star for himself, Gray picked one out right there :) Hot chocolate. We could have a whole discussion about it XD And yeah, every once in a while I need Natsu to grow a brain, ha ha. I tried to make sure he didn't suddenly become too smart, but he couldn't be entirely dense either. As for Cygnus, I knew that it was related to swans before I knew about the constellation, so it didn't seem too far-fetched for Lyon to make that leap. But idk, I could just be weird like that. Nah, you're not an idiot. Although you probably could've guessed it back when Gray was first talking about Ur's star ;)