Gasping for breath, Johnny sat up, sweating and panting, unable to shake the images from his mind. Shivering more from the memories than anything else, he leaned back into his bed and groaned.

Man, when will these memories stop? He wondered idly.

Trying to slow his breathing down, he grimaced as he felt the pain in his ribs and arms as he lowered himself down to a reclining position. Flashes of the last three and a half months came to him fast and furious: a home where a mom babysat five other neighborhood kids in addition to her child that was set ablaze by a seemingly unstoppable arsonist. After searching the home, Johnny and Roy finally found the last child, a young girl, just seven years old, hiding in a toy chest. Before they made it out of the home, she stopped breathing. Although they finally got her breathing again, it turned out she had been in the smoke too long and had suffered severe brain damage. She now was acting infantile and not much hope was held for her recovery…

Then there was that ten car pile-up due to slick surfaces and impatient drivers. Three squads had responded, but the lime green hatchback he was assigned to which had been crushed underneath a semi-truck. Seeing both the driver and passenger awake, though disoriented, gave Johnny hope. As he fought to free them, he learned they had married just a week ago. Hearing that made him rush faster, especially as both their vitals were dropping quickly from internal injuries. Calling out for help, Gage knew if he didn't get them out quickly, he'd lose them both. Unfortunately, his best hadn't been good enough. The girl had hung on long enough to make not only to the hospital, but also to surgery before the injuries became too much for her heart to cope with and she bleed out in the operating theater. Her fiancé hadn't even made it to the hospital and Doctor Early was forced to call time of death not long after John reached to hospital with him.

Shaking off that memory, Johnny tried to stop his mind from remember that all his efforts had been in vain. In fact, over the last few months, it seemed death had been mocking both him and Roy. Never before in his five years as a paramedic had things been so bad or seemed so helpless. There had been so much death and destruction lately; it didn't help he was stuck home for about three to four more weeks to heal from injuries he had received rescuing the arsonist. Cursing, Johnny swung his casted arm upwards, hitting the headboard.

Surprised at feeling a rush of pleasure, not pain, he did it again. Finding it to be soothing and that it helped stop the other memories trying to invade his mind, he sighed when an unexpected peace fell over him, causing him to drift back to sleep.