Final chapter, guys! I know it's taken a bit to get to this point, but we're finally at the end!

Thanks to Aureux for the Fav and Follow!

Chapter 17 - New Status Quo

The plan was to drop the demon triangle into the bottomless pit that evening, after sunset. Ford was going to be exhausted from working during the day to make something that would be more sturdy than a perfume bottle, but he had a design: a cylinder made from leftover pieces from his own portal, with a cap that could be very easily sealed with a torch or magic, if Fiddleford decided he wanted to get involved.

"How much longer is it going to take before he gets out here?" Pacifica asked impatiently. "I didn't bring bug spray and I don't want to be eaten alive out here tonight."

"You'll live," Stan grunted as he watched the house. The lights inside were on, but there wasn't any sign of movement – not yet. "It's not like the suckers here are as big as the ones further south. Those suckers were so big I could've—"

"Eew." Pacifica crinkled her nose. "I'd rather you didn't tell us about your time in Colombia. Hearing about the monsters that live out in the woods is bad enough!"

"Eh. Suit yourself." Stan shrugged, but he was smirking.

"So, you really think this will work?" Dipper asked. "To keep him from bothering us or anyone else, I mean." He nodded to the bottle Pacifica held in her hands. Cipher was floating on top of the perfumed liquid, arms folded across the bowtie under his eye. The bowtie and his hat both looked sopping wet.

"It better," Stan said. He kicked a rock into the large, black hole in the ground that shared the clearing with Ford's house. "According to Ford, this thing's a bottomless pit – almost everything that gets thrown in just disappears from existence. We're lucky this isn't Friday the 13th."

"Why?" Mabel tilted her head curiously.

"Cuz that's the only day everything we throw into the hole gets spat out again after half an hour or so. Ford timed it. Then he threw his car keys and a pair of socks down on the 14th and he lost his keys and one of the socks. The other one flopped back up like a fish that had jumped out and landed on someone's boat." Stan snorted. "It's unpredictable, but for the most part stuff that gets thrown down there doesn't come back."

"Good." Wendy nodded with a determined expression. "In that case, then he's not gonna come back and cause us trouble."

The door of the cabin opened, and Ford stepped out, Fiddleford right behind him. In the ghoul's hands was the metal cylinder he'd talked about making earlier that day. Fiddleford's expression was grim with concentration.

"So, where's the little bugger?" Fiddleford asked.

Pacifica held the perfume bottle out with two fingers. "Take him and do whatever you want with him."

Cipher's eye narrowed as Fiddleford took the bottle in his hands. The demon hadn't said a word since earlier in the day, and he certainly didn't seem interested in saying anything now.

"Well, looks like that spell actually did work," Fiddleford commented. "Any magical bein' who starts expressin' harm towards anyone who lives in Gravity Falls will have their power reduced. Seems you had a lot a' harm in mind, huh?" He shook the bottle a little, jostling Cipher and bumping him against the walls of the bottle. "Well, you're not gonna be causing us anymore trouble, that's f'sure." He looked over at Ford and nodded. "Let's get this over with an' get ya ta bed. Ya look like yer gonna fall over."

Ford scowled a little as he held the cylinder out, and watched with a satisfied gleam in his eye as the bottle was dropped in. The sound of glass hitting metal was heard before Fiddleford slammed the cap over the top of the cylinder and said a word that Dipper didn't quite catch.

The resulting dull flash blinded the group for a second, but when it faded the cylinder was one complete piece, no sign of seams anywhere – from either the cap or Ford's work at putting the container together.

"You have got to teach me that," Tambry said.

"All in good time," Fiddleford replied with a hint of satisfaction in his voice as he took the cylinder in his hands. "Ya'd have ta learn the basics first, and that's not gonna be for a while." He looked over the cylinder again and nodded to himself before looking around at the group assembled. "Well, unless anyone else has anythin' ta say, I'd say we can just toss this and leave it at that."

"Go ahead," Stan said as the others nodded in agreement. "Let's get this over with before he tries ta do somethin'."

Fiddleford nodded in agreement, then looked at the metal cylinder with a serious expression. "Well, I hope ya never come back, ya three-sided demon. I don't wanna see ya ever again." He drew an arm back, then threw it down into the pit. Dipper got the feeling that, if he had been throwing at the ground, the cylinder would have dented and the bottle inside would have been broken open.

Fiddleford dusted off his hands and nodded in satisfaction. "There. That monster should never be comin' back now."

"Thank God." Ford leaned against Fiddleford, looking terribly exhausted. "I should tell the Multibear that he won't be a problem."

"No, no, you're gonna go sleep. You had an excitin' day, and you're not gonna do anythin' else until you get a chance to relax for a few days." Fiddleford pulled one of Ford's arms across his shoulders. "Come on, we'll go back to the house."

"I'll tell the Multibear what happened," Wendy said. "He knows me well enough."

"Multibear?" Dipper repeated. "What kind of a bear is that?"

"He's a guardian spirit," Ford replied. "A bear with multiple heads. He protects the creatures of the forest and is in an unfortunate rivalry with the Manotaurs most of the time." He gave a shaky smile and chuckled weakly. "Well, until recently, that is."

Wendy grinned and laughed knowingly. "Yup! Six years ago they met my brothers and I made sure they got the message about bothering the poor guy. They've left him alone ever since."

"And call you a 'lumber goddess'?" Ford asked.

Wendy stared at him. "When did you—you know what, nevermind." She rolled her eyes and huffed. "Go sleep. I'll handle talking to them."

"Sounds good ta me," Fiddleford replied. "Come on, Ford – off ta sleep with ya."

Ford grumbled something, but he didn't protest as Fiddleford helped him back into the cabin.

As soon as the two of them had disappeared past the front doors, Stan sneezed.

"Gideon!" Stan bellowed. "Get out here right now or I'll sniff you out and sneeze all over you!"

There came a yelp from the bushes at the edge of the clearing, and a certain white-haired teenager stepped out into the open, wringing his hands. "Wh-why Pinington, I didn't see ya there!"

"Can it, kid," Stan snarled. He marched over, nose twitching so fast it might as well have been a rabbit's. He grabbed the front of Gideon's shirt and hefted him up. "How long were you watching that, huh? You've got five seconds before I get the vampire back out here so he can do his thing with ya."

Gideon squealed loudly and tried to pull back and away, but Stan was holding him high up enough that his feet were barely kicking the ground. "I didn't see anythin', I swear!"

"Oh, yeah? Then why were you here a few nights back and stole right from under our noses, huh? We don't exactly appreciate it when people do that and nearly cause the world ta end." Stan was growling out the words. "Give me a good reason not to leave you with the bitey ones in the house."

Gideon started stumbling over his words, not really getting out anything that sounded remotely coherent. Clearly, he was shaken up enough that he wasn't doing too well in thinking up excuses at the moment.

"Come on, kid, I know you can think of something quick on your feet." Stan turned his head sharply and sneezed again. It sounded like a dog barking sharply.

Gideon yelped at the sound. "I-I-I was j-j-just sent by the N-Northwests, I-I swear! Th-th-they wanted the triangle fella fer some reason! I-I-I d-didn't want ta get too close when there was a vampire around!" He looked around quickly. "I-is that triangle fella—"

"Gone," Stan replied flatly. He lowered Gideon to the ground, but he didn't let go of the boy's shirt. "You kids head back to your homes – Pacifica, I think it's safe ta say you're stayin' with Soos indefinitely?"

Pacifica nodded. "Oh, yeah. I didn't think that Mom and Dad were part of some weird creepy cult."

"That's one way a' putting it," Stan muttered. He sneezed again.

"What are you gonna do with Gideon?" Dipper asked, frowning.

"The kid? Fiddleford'll wipe his memory of this whole thing, like he did the first time Wendy and her crew busted into the house uninvited." Stan shrugged. "Gideon won't be a problem after tonight, so you kids don't worry about him, got it?"

Gideon whimpered.

Dipper frowned at that. "But, Grunkle Stan—"

"He's got this," Wendy said. "I think. He's only taking out the memories of what happened just now and the Northwests, right?"

"That'll be the plan, I bet." Stan shrugged. "Depends on what he gets out of him. Gets this weird look in his eye when he wants information." He grinned. "I'll see you kids later, kay? Don't worry about Gideon."

"Sounds good to me." Wendy gave a thumbs-up, then started to walk off into the woods. "I'll see you guys later."

"See ya, Wendy!" Dipper called after her. The group started to disperse, and Dipper looked over at Mabel as Stan dragged Gideon towards the house, the boy trying to get out of his grip and failing miserably. "So…back to Soos' house?"'

"Back to Soos' house," Mabel agreed.

Time Break

The rest of the summer was pretty quiet compared to those few days. When we ran into Gideon again, he looked pretty hazy and confused about who exactly we were. Mabel only got to revel in that fact for a couple hours before he abruptly remembered her and his stalker-crush. Thankfully, Stan was nearby when he started that up again.

"Just what do you think you're doing with my niece, Gideon?" Stan growled lowly across the counter.

Gideon spun on one foot and looked at Stan in surprise. "Your niece? Why, Mr. Pinington, I wasn't aware that—"

"Can it, kid. She's already made it clear enough that she doesn't want your hand in anything, so leave her alone. If I catch you anywhere near her….

Stan's voice trailed off menacingly enough that Gideon seemed to get the message, because he walked very quickly out of the dinner.

"Thanks, Grunkle Stan," Mabel said, relieved.

"Anytime, pumpkin."

Gideon wasn't a problem after that. The Northwests – Pacifica's parents, I mean – did start causing some form of a ruckus over us invading their home and destroying some of their prized furniture, but thanks to Pacifica's prodding the servants and offering them jobs as far away from the Northwests as possible that a different truth came to light. Turns out that Preston Northwest had been known to go on crazed periods recently, and destroyed his own furniture. There was even security camera proof.

The cameras never caught the yellow glint in his eyes, though.

Pacifica's officially moved in with Soos and Melody for a little while. She's planning on going out to college and living off-campus somewhere near it, get a job and start being even more self-sufficient than she already is.

"But, you're still technically connected to your parents' money, right?" Dipper frowned at Pacifica. "Wouldn't that mean that you could lose that nest egg at any time?"

Pacifica snorted. "What, do you think I'm stupid enough for that? As soon as I got the chance I got a bank account of my own. I've been saving my allowance there and wearing clothes that were popular five years ago. Most common folk don't really tell the difference between old and new stuff, though, so I can still play it off like I've got access to everything I want."

Mabel and Dipper exchanged looks.

"You know, as far as I know, most people don't care how much money you have unless you prove that you're willing to give them a lot of money," Mabel said. "I think you'll be okay just the way you are, without pretending."

Pacifica snorted like she didn't believe Mabel, but the look in her eyes suggested otherwise.

Wendy and the others are still doing what they can to research the forest and the creatures that live inside it. Now that the demon-thing that Grunkle Ford ran into isn't a problem anymore, more of them seem to be coming out of the woodwork. Tambry, Fiddleford, Candy, and Ford have been making more night runs to investigate certain areas. Mabel and I have gone along on a couple of them. The time with the Geodites was…interesting.

"I didn't think they came in different colors," Ford commented as he held one of the little crystal-and-rock creatures in one hand. "They must have different minerals that are their favorites and that results in the color differences. Fascinating!"

"They kind of look like Monstermons," Dipper commented, examining the red crystal growths on one of them. "Right, Candy?"

"I was just thinking the same thing!" Candy pushed her glasses further up her nose and looked a purple Geodite in the eye. "I want to bring one home with me. Can I?"

"Now, hold on, we don' know what these things eat specifically yet an' how well they'd do outside these caves," Fiddleford pointed out.

"It would be good to know, but I doubt it would be wise to take even one out," Ford said. He tapped his pen to his chin and sighed. "And no doubt feeding one would be terribly expensive, if they only eat certain stones."

"Eyup, that's a good point too. Better ta leave them here than sneak one home."

"Aww." Candy's shoulders sagged in disappointment.

Grunkle Ford and Grunkle Stan have had us over at the house a lot more since we took apart the portal at the Northwest Mansion. Mabel ends up helping them both relax more often than not. She's had to leave Waddles with Soos and Melody when we visit, though – Ford's caught himself drooling at the thought of eating the pig, and suggested that Mabel not take any chances in bringing him over to the house. With two blood-suckers and a werewolf, it's not the safest place for a pig to be, even if he trusts Grunkle Stan somehow.

Mabel claims that Grunkle Stan just has a way about him that makes him friendly to everybody except for stupidheads like Gideon. That's a direct quote, by the way.

In the end, the summer went by all too quickly, and while we managed to do a lot of things we weren't able to do back at home in Piedmont, probably the most memorable part of the summer was helping Grunkle Ford and Fiddleford write and publish a paper on the Unified Theory Of Weirdness. There were other papers we gathered evidence for – mostly the creatures that Grunkle Ford studied before he was turned into a ghoul – but in the end, he decided against it.

Gravity Falls is a place that is unusual, and if it was invaded by people who tried to explain it…well, Grunkle Ford isn't sure what's going to happen, but he's pretty sure that Gravity Falls wouldn't have liked scientists swarming into town and ruining the lives of the creatures who lived there.

We don't know how much attention the paper on the Unified Theory of Weirdness will do. Mabel and I promised to keep our ears to the ground for when the paper was published.

"We're sending it to a number of different scientific journals, so we will have to see if any one of them decide to pick up our research and publish it," Ford explained. "Considering the nature of my research, I doubt they will be willing to pick up something that deals in cryptids unless it is a journal that focuses specifically on that sort of thing."

"I suggested waitin' until April ta send it in an' pretend it was an April Fools' joke," Stan said with a cheeky grin. Ford sent him a glare. "What? If you think no one's gonna take it seriously, it makes sense."

"If we're gonna do that, I'd recommend sendin' in a paper on that lepracorn," Fiddleford said dryly. "That'd be seen as an April Fools."

Ford shuddered, then grinned and chuckled darkly. "If anyone else ever meets one, I hope that they can withstand whatever Irish tune it decides to sing at them for attention. Danny Boy can only be withstandable for so long before one starts to go mad."

Fiddleford and Stan exchanged looks as Dipper and Mabel stared at their ghoulish grunkle in confusion.

"…are you okay, Grunkle Ford?" Dipper asked carefully.

"He gets like this sometimes." Fiddleford waved off their concerned expressions. "Just change the subject an' he'll be fine."

And as for us…well, we had to go back home at the end of the summer. We promised Mom and Dad that we would be home for our birthday, even though we would have loved to celebrate it with Grunkle Stan and Grunkle Ford. We agreed not to tell our parents about our Grunkles yet – telling them that our grandpa's brothers are alive and undead isn't something we can spring on Mom and Dad out of the blue.

Which brought us to another problem: college. Mom and Dad had let us take some time off to do things for ourselves and figure out what we wanted to do with our lives, but they expected us to be able to pick a college or two and go there for the next four years.

However….

Stan was wiping down the counter in the diner as the door opened.

"Can I get a stack of pancakes?" asked a young man's voice.

"Yeah, sure, gimme a—" Stan looked up and blinked in surprise before a grin crossed his face. "Hey! I thought you kids went back to California! What are you doing here?"

"Hi, Grunkle Stan!" Mabel skipped in cheerily and sat down on a stool at the counter.

Dipper followed in after Mabel, grinning. "We decided to come back."

Stan snorted. "Well, I can see that. But what are you doing back here? I thought you kids were planning on going to college or something?"

"Well, we were thinking about it," Mabel replied. "But…."

"We decided that we wanted to move up here," Dipper replied.

Stan raised an eyebrow. "Really? For what reason?"

"Well, I want to be able to help Grunkle Ford with his research," Dipper started.

"And I'd like to be able to help too," Mabel added. "I can do art stuff like Grunkle Ford can, and if Dipper ever finds stuff like what lives here but in other places, I can help!"

"…are you sayin' you two kids are plannin' on becoming cryptid hunters?" Stan raised an eyebrow.

"Basically?" Dipper smiled sheepishly and shrugged a little. "I mean, you guys won't be able to go to some places out there. And there are more creatures that live around here besides the ones that have been found, too. So you guys need more help with that, right?"

Stan blinked a couple times, then grinned widely. "Tell you what, I'm gonna be done with my shift soon. How about we head out an' find Wendy and let her know that you're all moving in?"

"Yeah!" Mabel threw her hands in the air. "Gravity Falls, beware! The Mystery Twins are back in town and we're here to say!"

And that's what we've done – mostly. Grunkle Ford and Grunkle Stan let slip one night that they still wanted to sail around the world at least a little bit and fulfill their childhood dream, and there are a couple places that can only be reached by sea.

We'll be heading out in a couple months on a Kraken hunt. Wish us luck!

-Dipper Pines, Cryptid Researcher

Extra

It took some time, but Cipher was eventually able to break out of Llama's perfume bottle and his former ghoul's cylinder – that was a pain to break through. He didn't have much power at first. He didn't know what it was that was keeping him from it, but then it started trickling in.

Glasses – well, Vampire – had done something to the valley, and it had affected him. How, he wasn't sure.

But now his magic was coming back, and he needed to get out. Get back to his proper size again.

Which he managed to do, with a final punch to the metal, blowing it completely out of shape.

He pulled his way out and –

"Hey, this isn't the third dimension," Cipher muttered, his voice not quite back at full volume again. "What's with this weird fuzzy stuff?"

He poked at a cloud of soft green that floated past him, nearly invisible among the soft pinks, purples, and blues that swirled around him in strange patterns.

"I've been waiting for you, Bill Cipher."

Cipher whirled at the sound of the voice and looked up…and up…and up.

He swore in a number of different languages at once, which would have been impressive for anything mortal.

"I believe it is time for us to have a talk," the giant axolotl said casually.