Everything was going according to plan. Ever since he'd had his visions of a future where he would be freed, Zanza had planned for this day. He'd had visions of a young vessel with bright blue eyes and golden hair that would be delivered to him alongside a sacrifice of lives, whose ether he would take to supplement his own.

Dickson had done his job admirably, spreading the rumours of the mechon-destroying sword around to those Homs who would act upon it most readily. Even now he could feel them approaching.

Even as a soul contained within the husk of the Monado, he could feel when they cracked open the doors, a freezing blast of air running through his tomb. He smiled internally. The moment the unfortunate explorers set eyes upon him, and oh there was that beautiful little child, he took their lives as his own.

Smug in his victory, he descended into the prone form below his altar, dead eyes still wide open in curiosity.

And that was when he realized his mistake.

"DICKSSSSOOOOOOONN!"

He called desperately for the disciple, aghast at his discovery. Oh no. This was NOT happening! No!

Although it was planned that Dickson would arrive a day later to retrieve the child, he responded to his master's desperate call. The chain-smoking man was at his side within the hour, huffing and cursing at the snow.

"No!" he growled upon entering the tomb. No doubt he was offended that the worthless Homs had left their putrid bodies behind to rot and sully his master's home. Zanza paid it no heed.

"Dickson! What is the meaning of this!?" He howled, his voice echoing omnipotently from around the room. He dared not speak from the child's mouth, the body still recovering from its ordeal.

"The meaning of what, Lord Zanza?" his disciple faithfully inquired, even if his tone was a little cautious.

"Did you not research the family you sent to me beforehand!?" Zanza shrieked. Disckon actually blinked in shock, decidedly unused to seeing Zanza act so out of character.

"Yes, Lord Zanza. I found a group of researchers who could keep their mouths shut, and they said they had a kid at home that they'd occasionally bring along. They fit your bill, just like you said! So what's the matter?" he asked.

Zanza forcibly, if temporarily, took control of the body to show Dickson exactly why everything had gone wrong.

"It's a girl, Dickson!" he squeaked with her voice.

This should not have been a big of an issue as it was. But blast it, he couldn't help it. He was too shocked by this revelation to act properly, and oh Bionis Meyneth was going to make a laughingstock out of him. His emotions roiled, as did his powers. He was actually a she! But Zanza identified as a he! This was not supposed to happen!

Dickson's sudden laughter was not helping matters.

The spirit of the little girl he'd just taken over seemed to come to its senses, no doubt due to the excess ether he was putting off in his frustration. That put yet another wrench in the works, because she was not supposed to be aware of his presence. It only got worse when, instead of freaking out about her surroundings (she was too young to understand death it seemed, because he got the distinct impression of 'mummy and daddy are sleeping so I gotta shush') and, upon realizing that another being was now sharing her body, did not in fact scream and beg.

Instead, she gave him the mental equivalent of a squishy cutesie hug. Was mister cranky-voice okay?

"Dickson she is talking to me!"

Dickson kept laughing.

"This is all your fault why didn't you check!?" Alright, he knew that should have really been his job, but it wasn't his fault she'd been dressed to the nines in a snowsuit in his vision!

The mental cuddle he was getting just got stronger. Shulk was wondering if she did something bad (what an odd name for a girl, maybe he wasn't the only one who'd mistaken her gender), and gods damn that amount of cute and innocent coming off of her was making him sick.

Zanza screamed.

The world was silent.

Dickson fell over with a thunk, face practically blue as his frame shook with breathless mirth. He was laughing so hard it hurt, yet he couldn't get enough air to make any noise.

Shulk hugged him some more.

Zanza gave up.