Disclaimer- I do not own any of the Total Drama characters that I choose to torture—I mean put in the story! They are merely here for mine, and your amusement. No profit is being made off of this (No one would would stoop as low as to pay me for this anyway) I give all credit to the creators of Total Drama, as well as Johnny Depp, because...well, he's Johnny Depp! [1]
Notes From The Depths of Sarcasm- I'm sorry to those of you who were enjoying TDRTG, but I got bored with it, and I figured out that I'm less than succesful at writing OC stories. So, this competition I'm bringing back 36 contestants from the previous seasons, with NO OC's, and I will be continuing!
In other news, I want to make one thing clear. This season is NOT, I repeat NOT, I repeat a third time NOT in the same timeline as TDRTG! So anything that happened in that season doesn't happen! This story takes place roughly six months after Pahkitew Island.
Now without further ado, something completely different: The beginning!
Chapter 01 (Day 01, Part 1)- Quips, Quarrels, and a Large Quantity of Contestants!
Chris McLean stood on a newly built dock, one belonging to the large island of green rolling hills and cliffs; Pahkitew Island.
"Welcome to Total Drama: Unfinished Business!" Chris said to the camera. "Our seventh season promises more action, laughs, and gut-bustingly funny, painful moments! We're bringing back thirty eight contestants who have unfinished business with this show, so hopefully we can stir up the last bit of drama these suckers have!"
"When it's all over, only one will come out with ONE MILLION DOLLARS!" Chris announced as a canoe full of money, being supported by rope, dropped down from nowhere. "Speaking of contestants, here comes our first returnee now!"
A white and gold yacht approached the island, stopping at the dock. Alejandro hopped off, carrying a duffel bag; the color matching his shirt.
"Alejandro!" Chris acknowledged. "Looks like your back after that um...lava incident." Chris chuckled sheepishly. "I know you were back for our All-Stars season, but it's clear your wrath wasn't done!"
"Right you are Chris." Alejandro said matter-of-factly. "My sweet Heather will be worthy competition once again, but it shouldn't be too difficult to charm the rest of the ladies into doing my bidding." As if to show off this charm, Alejandro grinned, a glimmer sparkling off his teeth.
"Alright, if you'll head to the end of the dock, we can continue the introduction." Chris instructed him.
"Wait," Alejandro interjected, "If there are thirty-six contestants, how are we all going to fit on this dock? If that butterdonkey Owen is competing, we'll all sink!"
"Excellent question!" Chris declared. "You see, the dock was specially built for the introduction, so that's super-strong wood you're standing on. Not to mention, the dock was made to be longer and wider than the one back at Wawanakwa. Which...is...gone." Chris trailed off.
"Anyway, here's Alejandro's nasty girlfriend, Heather!" Chris continued. "She's back after getting her head shaved and getting duped by, none other than, Alejandro!"
"I can still hear you!" Heather growled as her yacht approached the dock. It came to a halt at the dock and the skinny, raven-haired girl stepped off.
"Don't think I'm going to forgive you for what you did to me last season!" She snarled at Alejandro. "That Chris statue was mine!"
Alejandro smiled and shrugged. Heather begrudgingly walked over to him and stood next to him, but turned her head away.
"Next up we have everyone's favorite Malibu barbie, Bridgette!" Chris motioned to the approaching yacht. "She's back after being kicked off for smelling skunky, getting kicked off first, and being duped into kissing a pole by, once again, Alejandro!" Chris chuckled.
"Are you trying to ruin my image?" Alejandro groaned.
Bridgette hopped off of her yacht, carrying her orange and yellow surfboard, along with a light blue duffel bag. Her smile dropped when she saw who was greeting her. "Um...high Alejandro and Heather." She said, not-so-energetically. The surfer girl sighed and walked over to the two villains. She stood her surfboard up on the back end and waited for the next contestant to arrive, hopefully one of her friends.
And in deed it was. "Geoff, everybody!" Chris announced. "Back because he wasn't able to compete in TDWT after looking for help when the cast was trapped in a random gorge!"
"Sweet dude!" Geoff exclaimed, hopping off his yacht. "Bridgie-bear! Great to see you back!" The party dude dropped his black duffel bag and ran over to hug Bridgette. Heather watched, disapprovingly rolling her eyes as the couple began to passionately make out.
"Promise me you won't make out the entire time." Gwen remarked, although she was grinning. The Goth hopped off her yacht and passed Chris without even a glance.
"Gwen, everyone!" Chris said, slightly off-put by the lack of attention. "She's back after losing to Owen, getting eliminated twice because of relationship problems, and getting booted after defacing a portrait of moi with bear poop." Chris said, frowning.
Gwen hugged Bridgette and the two began to chat, along with Geoff. The next yacht arrived, carrying DJ. "DJ everyone!" Chris exclaimed. "Great to have you back after being kicked off because you were the only one left on your team!" Chris said, patting DJ on the back as he passed the host.
"Nice to be back too! A new island I see, cool, as long as it's not Wawanakwa." DJ breathed a sigh of relief. "I promised to never go back there as long as there was breath in my lungs!"
"Yeah, well Wawanakwa's gone after the little mishap a few seasons ago." Chris said, none-to-happy about it. DJ walked over to Geoff and the two exchanged a high-five and began chatting.
"Fresh from big boy prison, we have...Duncan." Chris deadpanned. "He's back after BLOWING UP MY COTTAGE!" Chris shouted angrily.
"IT WAS A MANSION!" Courtney shouted back, arriving on the next yacht. Duncan passed Chris without saying anything. The punk just stood next to Geoff and DJ, glaring at Courtney's yacht. "I'd rather be back at prison than be with you again." He sneered at Chris.
"Ah, contracts! You gotta love them!" Chris grinned, holding up a large stack of paper.
"Speaking of contracts, I intend to be treated with respect this season! I will not be eating ice cream with bird poop on it!" Courtney snapped. She crossed her arms passed Duncan without saying a word. She stood next to Bridgette and Gwen.
"The bully's nerd, Harold!" Chris exclaimed. "He's back after voting himself off in TDWT!"
Harold's yacht arrived and the Ubber-nerd observed his competition. "I hope this isn't everybody." Harold said. "Where's my fair LeShawna?"
"She's right after you!" Chris exclaimed. "LeShawna's back after slapping some sense into Heather, knocking a few teeth lose, I might add!"
"Don't go overboard." Heather snarled.
"Hey y'all! LeShawna's back in the house, and she came to win this time!" LeShawna exclaimed, hopping off of her yacht as it stopped at the dock.
She gave Harold a hug and the two found themselves catching up as they stood next to Courtney, Bridgette and Gwen.
"The jock who didn't get a chance, Tyler!" Chris said. "Back after losing it to a chicken, and to an alien! Can he survive the nature this time around?"
"I wouldn't call aliens nature," Noah remarked, approaching on the same yacht as Tyler. "Not to mention chickens are usually domesticated."
"Noah...what are you doing on the same yacht as Tyler?" Chris asked.
"Chef said my yacht crashed into a couple of sharp rocks before getting to the shore, so he told me to hitch a ride on Tyler's since I was next." Noah explained.
"Chef said something about a drunk captain?" Tyler said, not sounding too happy. "You have some real moral issues if you're hiring drunk people."
As if to prove this point, the next yacht came screaming down the water. Suddenly, a very thrilled Izzy came screaming through the yacht's windshield as the ship crashed into a couple of rocks near the shore. Izzy landed with a thud on the dock.
'What the heck was that?!" Courtney shouted, motioning to the yacht wreckage. "What is wrong with you?!"
Izzy put a hand to her head. "Ow...that hurt," She mumbled, "But it was totally fun!" She said, getting back into the Izzy of things.
"See, she liked it!" Chris shrugged.
"Well, she's Izzy." Noah remarked.
"That captain was so drunk, he had three cans of booze in the cup holders and he was puking all over the control panel!" Izzy recalled.
"He was that drunk?!" Harold exclaimed. "Gosh, Chris, you do have some serious moral problems!"
"The yachts have cup holders?" Geoff asked.
"Okay, maybe I need to give these guys a raise, but hey, it made for some drama didn't it?" Chris shrugged. Luckily, the next yacht was captained by someone who was actually sober. "Eva, everyone! Back after being kicked off for anger issues!" Chris grinned.
"Well she did have anger issues!" Courtney complained. "There's no denying that!"
"So what if I have anger issues?!" Eva hollered from her yacht as it stopped by the dock. "At least I don't use my lawyers to cheat my way into winning the game!"
"For your information, I didn't win!" Courtney snapped.
"As much as I encourage fighting between the campers, I'm going to have to tell you to wait until lunch, we need to get these introductions moving, we've got a lot of people to do!" Chris said. "Speaking of which, next up is everyone's favorite love-sick musician, Trent!"
Trent got off of his yacht. He looked at Gwen, who was oblivious to his entrance, for she was busy talking to Bridgette. He looked to his friends Geoff and DJ, who were also busy talking to each other. He let a sigh and stood by them, carrying his guitar, but none of them noticed him.
"Such a shame." Chris shook his head. "Moving on! Here's Cody, back after being mauled by a bear, and getting tossed into Shark-infested waters!"
Cody's yacht arrived at the dock and Cody gave a sly (or what he thought was sly) grin. "Yo, what's up? It's great to be back on an island!" he said.
"How's it feel to be free of Sierra's grasp?" Chris asked.
"Wait, Sierra's not competing?!" Cody exclaimed. "Yes! I never thought it would happen, but I'm finally rid of her!" He looked at the camera and realized Sierra was probably watching. "Um...no offense."
Now in an even better mood than before, Cody strutted over to where Gwen was and stood next to her. "Oh, hey Cody." She deadpanned. She looked over and saw Trent. "Oh, hey Trent! When did you get here?"
Trent glared at her and rolled his eyes, not saying a word. Gwen looked at him, confused, but shrugged it off and continued talking to Bridgette.
"Home-schooled sexist, Ezekiel!" Chris said. Ezekiel's yacht stopped at the dock and the prairie boy stepped off. "What's up Zeke?"
Ezekiel looked up at the sky and Chris sighed. "It's an expression! Seriously, the last time you were on an island, you did the same thing!"
"Excuse me of I doon't get o'ot much, eh." Ezekiel said. "And stop calling me sexist, eh! I didn't mean it back then!"
"Whatever you say." Chris shrugged. He let Ezekiel pass by and then continued on with his intro. "And finally, from our original Total Drama Island cast, BFFFL's, Katie and Sadie! Heaven knows what that stands for." Chris muttered.
"Omigosh!" Katie exclaimed. "It's, like, so great to be back after, like, five seasons!"
"Omigosh, you're so right!" Sadie agreed. The two BFFFL's hugged each other and let out a squeal, much to Noah's annoyance, who covered his ears.
"Alright, returning from Revenge of the Island, we have Jo, after being duped by Cameron, and voted out third by her own team!" Chris said.
"No need for a flashback, hosty." Jo sneered. "As long as that annoying jock, Lightning isn't back, I'll be fine." She said matter-of-factly.
"Well then, step right this way." Chris motioned to the rest of the waiting cast. Jo rolled her eyes naturally and did what she was told. "Since Lightning's not competing, here's Jo's other rival, Brick!" Chris exclaimed. Jo groaned and glared the host, along with Brick was approaching on his yacht.
The army cadet hopped off the yacht and grinned at his competition. "Cadet Brick MacArthur, reporting for duty!" He said happily. "Great to be back sir!" He gave a salute.
Katie giggled and tried to hold in a laugh. "He said duty!" She snickered, Sadie giggling along with her.
"This way cadet." Chris said, motioning to a spot near Jo. "Alright, everyone's favorite scheming rat boy, Scott!"
"Don't call me rat boy! Just because Courtney drew a picture of me as a rat, doesn't mean I am one!" Scott shouted. "I prefer pain-magnet, it's a lot like chick magnet." He grinned.
"Whatever let's you sleep at night, rat boy." Chris said. Scott glared at him and stood next to Brick. "Next up, fresh from the Radiation Lab, it's Dakota!"
The next yacht arrived and a tall teenage girl stepped from the deck. "Hello Chris." She said not-so-friendly. "This island better be rid of Toxic Waste and radiation or I will sue! AGAIN!" She shouted.
"Calm down miss diva." Chris remarked. "We had to pay a lot of money to even let the radioactivity scientists look at you! I don't even want know how much we payed for them to do an operation on you!" Chris snapped.
"Yeah, well it was your fault in the first place!" Dakota growled. "And it took forever! I literally just got back from the lab, I didn't even get to visit my friends back home!"
"That's right..." Chris remembered. "Your radioactivity scientists told me that you may experience some slight mutations when at high levels of stress. But it's only temporary. I'll have to remember to make you the center of some drama." Chris noted and grinned.
Dakota gave him a deep scowl and stood by Scott and Brick. "Alright, now we're picking things up!" Chris continued. "Everyone's favorite silent inventor who was sabotaged by Scott, it's B!"
B arrived on the next yacht, smiling at his competition. He carried a large black duffel bag and passed Chris without saying a word, because he never says a word.
"C'mon man, can you at least talk for once?" Chris asked. B shook his head no. "I'm going to vow to make you talk at least once during this season! That is, if you're not voted off first!" Chris chuckled. B glared at him but still said nothing.
"I don't believe you're going to make B talk," Came a chirpy voice. "His aura says he never talks, and it will likely remain that way."
"Creepy aura whisperer Dawn, back after also getting sabotaged by Scott." Chris introduced.
"Would you stop living in the past?!" Scott shouted. "I'm different now you dorky host!"
Chris ignored this comment and waited for the short aura-whisperer to pass him. Dawn stood by Courtney, who eyed her suspiciously. "Last up from the Revenge of the Island cast, here's Anne Maria, back after quitting when she thought she had a diamond, which turned out to be fake!" Chris cackled.
"Yeah, and ya didn't even gimme a chance to get outta that dumb catapult." Anne Maria said in her Jersey accent. "I was left with a useless diamond and arm boy over there." She said, jabbing a thumb in Brick's direction. "You shoulda told me before I quit!"
"Shoulda, woulda, coulda, didn't!" Chris shrugged, leaving an angry Anne Maria walking over and standing next Scott, who grinned at her.
"Keep your distance, rat boy." She snapped.
"Why does everyone keep calling me that?!" He cried out.
"Now we're onto our returnees from Pahkitew Island!" Chris announced. "Back after angering a chicken and electrocuting his team, it's Rodney!" The farm boy's yacht came speeding down the water, crashing into the dock. Chris and several contestants had to jump out of the way, or be hit by the boat.
"What the heck!" Chris shouted from the water. He had to jump in the opposite direction, which happened to be water. "Rodney! What's wrong with your captain!"
Rodney screamed and fell from the yacht, crashing onto the dock. "Ow! That driver had more than a few!" Rodney complained. Tyler, Noah and Courtney all glared at Chris, who had climbed back into the dock.
"Great, now my hair's all wet and the dock is broken!" Chris complained.
"Rodney and several of us nearly died when his drunk captain crashed into the dock!" Tyler shouted. "And you're complaining about the broken dock and your hair?!"
"Excuse us while we clean the place up." Chris said.
A telemarketer with a cheesy grin is standing on what appears to be a sunny beach. "Are you bored when you go to the beach? Do you want something to play with? Well look no further than the Total Drama Yacht Party Play-set!" The man said. [2]
A life-sized yacht floated onto the shore, getting itself beached. A puking captain could be visibly seen through the windshield of the ship. There were beer stains all over the walls and glass. "With the Total Drama Yacht Party Play-set, you can experience the terror and mayhem of a drunk captain! Just like on the real Total Drama!" He telemarketer grinned even more.
"The Total Drama Yacht Party Play-set is perfect for the beach, you can run over annoying beach goers, get yourself beached on the sand, or even go scuba-diving and subsequently crashing into an Iceberg! The Total Drama Yacht Party Play-set has it all!" The man said, motioning to the yacht, which was, of course, heading for an iceberg. "And this Total Drama Yacht Party Play-set can be yours for only $99.99! No more beach boredom, get your Total drama Yacht Party Play—
"Hold it!" Chris shouted, interrupting. "Who hired you?!"
"The producers did of course!" The man said.
"I don't think so!" Chris said. "Get out of here! This is not a quality commercial!"
"I'll have you know that—
"And we're back, after that excruciating commercial!" Chris said, "Which should not have been aired!"
"Um...did we go anywhere?" Geoff asked.
"Yeah, what are you talking about?" Duncan asked. "We've all just been standing here silently for the past five minutes."
Chris shook his head and sighed, "You know nothing about television filming!" He muttered. "Anyway, terrible commercials aside, next up we have Ella, back for some reason since I disqualified her for singing."
"Aaaaaaaaah, Aaaaaaaaah!" She sang as she leaped with grace from the yacht. "It's good to be baaaack, and that's a faaaact!" [3]
"Ella, the producers tell me that I can't boot you off for singing again, so could you please refrain from singing in my presence!" Chris requested as nicely as he could muster.
"While I do love singing, I will try to refrain from it when you are around." Ella agreed politely. "La la laaaa, la la laaaa." She sang as she danced over to the others. She suddenly remembered she wasn't supposed to sing in front of Chris and slapped a hand over her mouth. "Sorry!" She apologized.
"Everyone's favorite bickering twins, Amy & Samey!" Chris introduced, motioning to the approaching yacht. And when Chris said bickering, he wasn't kidding! Amy and Samey were already fighting, spewing insults and grabbing at each other's hair.
"Girls, calm down, save the fighting for later." Chris requested.
"Sure thing Chris!" Amy said politely, although it was fake. The mean twin let go of Samey's hair and stepped off of the yacht like an elegant princess. "Rodney, Ella," She greeted. She was trying to act polite in front of her competition, or at least for now until she revealed her nasty self later.
Samey let out a low growl and stormed over the other contestants, not making eye contact with any of them. "Lucky for you Samey, we're also bringing back your Australian outback friend!" Chris said. "Jasmine! Back after getting duped by Sugar!"
"And she'll pay for it if she's back!" Jasmine snarled as she hopped off of her yacht.
"Don't worry, that pageant queen wannabe won't be returning, no one deserves to have to talk to that for a half hour!" Chris exclaimed, much to Jasmine's enjoyment.
"Hey! I ain't no pageant queen wannabe! And my stories a mighty int'restin'!" Sugar complained from Jasmine's yacht. Both Chris and Jasmine cried out in surprise.
"Gah! What are you doing back here?!" Chris demanded.
"I demand to be let back on the show! I was unfairly kicked off last season! I didn't even get to finish my Craptry!I" She complained.
"There is no way you're getting back on the show!" Chris said. "CHEF!" He shouted. "CODE SUGAR!"
Suddenly, to many people's surprise, Chef came running down the dock. "Get over here annoying girly!" He called out. The beefy cook grabbed Sugar by her blubbery waist and hauled her off. "But Imma PAGEANT QUEEN!" He cried out as Chef dragged her away.
"Well, that was satisfying." Jasmine chuckled. The Australian girl stood by Samey and the two began to chat about friends and family and such.
"Here's the Olympic gymnast who failed last season, Sky!" Chris said.
"I'd appreciate it if you didn't bring that up." Sky sighed. "I don't care what you say, I'm going to win this one!"
"Why? Because you won't have Dave holding you back?" Chris teased.
"Wait, Dave's not competing?" Sky asked, sounding a little sad, but also glad.
"Nope, he's competing!" Chris chuckled. "I just wanted to see your reaction." With that, Dave was the next to arrive. He had all of his hair back, but it was more of a buzz-cut that his normal hair style.
"Six months and your hair still didn't grow back completely?" Chris chuckled. "Sucks to be you!"
"For your information, I don't wanna be here!" He snapped. "Especially if I'm on the same team as her!" Dave whined.
"Excuse me, but I was trying to win!" Sky snapped right back. "I said I liked you too 'but', but you didn't wanna listen, so that's your fault!"
"Well excuse me if I wanted to hook up with a pretty girl!" Dave said, a few tears forming in his eyes. "Then Chris revealed you were leading me on all this time!" Several jeers and comments were made as the contestants and Chris watched back and forth at the argument.
"Every time I tried to tell you, you either interrupted me, or Chris interrupted me! I promise I would've told you, but you didn't let me!" Sky shouted.
"As much as I'd love to break out the popcorn here, we really need to get moving along." Chris said. "Sky, stand by Jasmine. Dave, stand by Ella."
Sky crossed her arms and angrily stood by Jasmine, glaring at Dave he wasn't looking. Dave begrudgingly walked over to Ella and offered a greeting. "Hi." He sighed.
"Oh, why hello Prince David!" Ella giggled. Dave was confused by this, but wasn't able to say anything since Chris was continuing on with the introduction.
"Here's Topher, back for some reason." Chris said, not very happy at all.
"Hey Chris!" Topher exclaimed as he got off his yacht. He sounded happier than Chris would have thought after the host had tricked him last season. "Great to be back! Sorry about last time, got a little carried away with your glory!"
Chris beamed. "Ah Topher, all can be forgiven." He grinned. "Right this way." The host motioned Topher over to the others. The Chris wannabe did as told and when Chris wasn't looking, he gave a devilish grin.
"Also back for some reason, Max." Chris sighed. "back because I kicked him off with Scarlett because he was annoying."
"Right you are to bring EVIL back onto this show!" Max said. "Your future overlord will be winning this season, and he'll use this money to TAKE OVER THE WORLD! BWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!" The self proclaimed evil genius cackled.
"Yeah, yeah, you're gonna take over the world." Chris mimicked. "Just go stand over there while I introduce our last competitor.
"Back after trying to destroy the island, and almost killing everyone, it's Scarlett?" Chris exclaimed, reading off his cue cards. "What?! Why is she back?!"
"Because, my prison guards have dubbed me rehabilitated, and I'm ready to compete in a fair form this season." Scarlett said as her yacht stopped at the dock.
"Really? Your guards said you were rehabilitated?" Chris exclaimed.
"Of course! Did you not get the phone call?" Scarlett asked.
"Nah, I transferred it to one of the producers." Chris shrugged. "I guess if they deem you worthy to compete again, so be it."
Many of the contestants, even the ones that had not competed alongside Scarlett, looked utterly terrified, ready to soil their pants, or unsure if she really had changed.
"Alright, after Rodney's captain destroyed the dock, it might not be as strong as it was before, so we'd better get you all into the mess hall! Chef prepared a lunch of baked paste!" Chris said, much to the contestant's displeasure.
The contestants were now in the Mess Hall, Chef was in the kitchen, cooking up some abomination. Several contestants waited in line for 'baked paste' as Chris called it. None of them really cared to eat it, but they'd rather not starve.
Others sat at tables, chatting with each other, waiting for the day to start. Dawn and B were chatting, although Dawn did all the talking, B just listened and nodded his head or mimed something.
Anne Maria was busy applying eyeliner to herself, and Katie and Sadie was swooning over Alejandro, who didn't notice them, for he was busy talking to Heather about strategy.
Dakota sat alone at table in the corner, debating what to do now. Rodney was desperately trying not to make a fool of himself in front of Amy, and Cody was talking to Gwen, who wasn't as thrilled.
Noah was reading a book, while Eva listened to her MP3 player. Izzy was next to them, yakking about some crazy story to Eva, who wasn't even listening.
"Oh my, this paste looks wonderful!" Ella complimented Chef. The cook gave no response, and just plopped an extra glob of paste onto Ella's tray. The singer sighed and walked away, heading to a table with Sky, Jasmine and Samey.
Ezekiel, tray in hand, walked over to Dakota and sat across from her. The two loners exchanged a glance, but said nothing.
"Welcome campers, to Total Drama Unfinished Business!" Chris exclaimed, some cheers and whoops were let out from the crowd of contestants, but other than this, most of the teens remained silent. "Before I explain the rules, I'd like to remind you all that we've brought back our outhouse confessional! Feel free to speak your mind, or get something off your chest!"
(Outhouse Confessional- The first of the season!)
Courtney- "I can't believe I'm back for another season of this game! This will be the last time if I don't win, but I will, so there's no need to complain." She said matter-of-factly. "The competition seems good, several people I could easily vote off with an alliance. The only one I'm not so sure about is Dawn. She claims she reads aura's, but I bet that's a lie! She probably just reads everyone's profile and stalks them, like Sierra."
Cody- "Now that Gwen's free again, and there's no way she's hooking up with Duncan or Trent again, It's time to make my move!"
Eva- "I'd better not be voted off second again! I've gone to a bunch of anger management classes, and hopefully, I can keep my temper under control, even around these freaks!"
Dakota- "Chris is so gonna get it!"
Jasmine- "Glad to see Sugar's not back, but it's a shame Shawn's not competing. I miss him! But at least I've got Samey, she's fun, as long as we can get Amy voted off first, this'll be a fun season!
Noah- "Yeah, I don't know why Chris brought me back. He doesn't like me, most people don't like me, but apparently I have a big fan-base. Excellent, Noah fans. I have trained you well." He smirked.
Heather- Great! Now that's Alejandro, LeShawna, weird Goth girl, and CIT Courtney are back, this season's gonna be hell! As much as I hate to say it, I need to form an alliance, but definitely not one with Alejandro! Perhaps one with Courtney, Duncan, and a newbie..."
Ezekiel- "Ever since season one, people have been harassing me and my family fur those comments I made on the first episode, eh. I feel really bad about it, and I just want to say that I apoo'logize! I didn't mean any of what I said, and I was st'oopid back then." he explained. "I just hope the oo'thers can fur'give me, eh."
Bridgette- "I overheard Ezekiel's confession, and I want to say that I'm really proud of him! That must have been hard for him to do after all the harassment. I think I'll make it a vow to be nice to him, maybe even make a new friend out of him!"
"Alright, now that you're all seated with lunch, I can explain how this season's going to work!" Chris said. "You see, since there are thirty-six of you, which is a lot, the producers and I have decided that there will be no official teams this season, each challenge, you will be put into a different team. Not only will this force drama, it'll give you all a chance to talk to each other." Chris explained.
Some contestants like Geoff, Cody and Tyler looked stoked, while others like Heather, Alejandro and Amy were less than thrilled.
"Before I announce the teams for the first challenge of the season, let's get you to your rooms!" Chris said. "Contestants returning from TDI or TDWT will be sleeping in the TDI Cabin, it's the one closest to the mess hall. Contestants returning from Revenge of the Island will sleep in the TDROTI Cabin, which is the cabin in the middle. Finally, contestants returning from Pahkitew Island will sleep in the TDPI cabin, the one furthest from the Mess Hall." Chris explained. "To keep from confusion, each cabin is branded with that season's logo."
Many contestants seemed okay with this, but others like Heather and Gwen were not happy. "There's no way I'm sharing a room with her, again!" Gwen growled, referring to Heather.
"And I'm not sharing a room with Weird Goth Girl." Heather scoffed. "I've had to share a room with her every season."
"Well too bad, off to your rooms you go!" Chris said, ignoring Heather and Gwen. "Oh, and the Communal Washrooms are over by the Pahkitew cabin." Chris told them.
(TDI Cabin – Bridgette, Courtney, Eva, Gwen, Heather, Izzy, Katie, LeShawna, Sadie)
"Omigosh!" Katie exclaimed. "This'll be so fun! It'll be like a giant sleepover!"
"Omigosh! Just like a giant sleepover!" Sadie agreed. The BFFFL's undoubtedly shared a bunk bed.
Gwen and LeShawna shared a bed, and Bridgette shared one with Courtney. "At least none of us have to sleep with Heather." Gwen grinned.
"Oh boy! Izzy will share a bunk bed with Heather!" Izzy giggled.
Heather did not look happy. "Fine, but I get the top bunk!" She said quickly. Izzy shrugged and took the bottom bunk, while Heather took the top one.
"Where's my bed?" Eva barked as she entered the cabin. Heather, Bridgette, Katie and Sadie nervously pointed to an empty bunk bed. "Sweet, I get two bunks." She grinned. The fitness buff put her stuff on the bottom bunk, and climbed up to the top. She relaxed in her bed until she felt something poking her back. "What the hell?!"
The muscle bound girl got up and uncovered her blanket from the bed. "A hermit crab?!" She exclaimed. "What the heck is this doing here?!" She growled. Eva grabbed the crustacean and hurled it away from her bed. Unfortunately for Heather, her bed was across from Eva's, therefor the crab landed in her hair.
She let out a scream. "AAAH! Get it off me!" She screamed. The queen bee ripped it from her hair and threw it out the door, where it hit Cody in the face, who had rushed over to see what was wrong. The Tech geek cried out and ran out of the cabin, trying to get the crab from his face. Gwen and Eva couldn't help but chuckle.
"Did I forget to mention that we fished these cabins from the wreckage of Wawanakwa?" Chris asked. "Because we did. You might find some fishy friends in your covers!" Chris could be heard chuckling on the other side of the intercom just before he turned it off.
"Well, that explains the fish in my pillow!" Izzy giggled. She grab said fish and bit the head off. Several of the girls, Bridgette especially, looked at her in horror, disgust, and confusion.
(Outhouse Confessional- Should she have bitten the head off?)
Izzy- "I don't care what they say, the head is the best part! Say...I just realized, my Big O isn't competing!" She gasped.
Heather- "Besides sleeping in a bunk bed with crazy girl, the room doesn't seem to be too bad. As long as Gwen and Bridgette leave me alone I'll be good. Oh yeah, and Eva should probably go soon before she karate-chops one of the beds."
Eva- "Really, Chris?!" She seethed. "You fished the cabins form the lake and didn't bother to clean the insides?!" She grit her teeth. "Well, my anger management teacher told me to look on the positive side of things...hmm...well, at least it wasn't all wet?"
Bridgette- "Why does Izzy always eat the heads off of her fish?" She sighed. "Heck, why does she eat fish anyway? Come to think of it, why does Izzy do a lot of things?"
(TDI Cabin – Alejandro, Cody, DJ, Duncan, Ezekiel, Geoff, Harold, Noah, Trent, Tyler)
"Sweet dudes! This'll be like a giant party!" Geoff cheered. "We can sneak some food in and throw a huge party! Maybe even invite some of the girls!"
"Geoff my man!" Duncan high-fived the party dude. "You always come up with the best ideas!" The punk tossed his black duffel bag onto the bottom bunk, while Geoff tossed his gray one on the top. DJ shared a bunk with Tyler, and Harold shared a bunk with Trent.
Ezekiel figured no one wanted to be in the same bed as him, so he took the spare bunk by himself, except when Alejandro took the top bunk. Ezekiel shrugged, figuring it wasn't bad if someone shared a bunk with him. "So where am I supposed to sleep then?" Noah asked.
"Oh, you can sleep with Cody." Geoff said. He suddenly realized what he just said began giggling. "That's not what I meant...I mean you can—
"Why must everyone question my sexuality?!" Noah complained.
(Outhouse Confessional- We support NoCo yes we do, we support NoCo how bout you?)
Noah- "Seriously! One clip in season one, and everyone starts shipping us! No one can deny that Cody's into girls, and if I could just get a girlfriend, maybe my brothers wouldn't always tease me about it! I can't say the same for my dad though..."
Tyler- "I'm the least talked about contestant on all the fan blogs! Even that beat-box guy Beardo gets more cred, and he didn't even say anything last season!" Tyler sighed. "Maybe this season I'll become someone more than Lindsay's boyfriend. It kinda sucks that she's not competing this season." He sighed.
Harold- "Maybe this season won't be so bad. Hopefully Duncan and Geoff won't be idiots and steal my underwear again! Gosh!"
Trent- The musician sighed. "Now that Gwen broke up with me, I've been feeling kind of depressed lately. Geoff, DJ and Duncan seem to be ignoring me too, they didn't even notice I was introduced, they were too busy talking to each other." Trent sighed.
(TDROTI Cabin – Anne Maria, Dakota, Dawn, Jo)
"Sweet! There's only four of us so we can all have our own bunks!" Anne Maria celebrated. "I was worried I'd have to sleep with one of you."
"Well, I'm glad I don't have to sleep in the same bunk as you tan-in-a-can." Jo remarked.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, do not disrespect the tan!" Anne Maria growled. "Or you'll get the beat down!"
As the two continued to spew insults and argue, Dawn was literally hanging upside down from her top bunk. She was in an upside down Lotus position, and didn't seem to be worrying about the ensuing fight.
"Could you two keep it down, I haven't gotten any sleep since they started doing tests on me, I'm trying to take a nap!" Dakota said. She already had her sleep mask on and was under her covers, resting against her pillow. Except that her sleep mask wasn't a sleep mask.
"Um...mutant girl...what's on your face?" Jo asked.
"I'm not a mutant anymore!" Dakota snapped. She pulled what she thought was her sleep mask off and looked at it. "Gah! Two starfish!" She shrieked. She threw the starfish out the door, where they happened to land on Scott, who was passing by. He looked down and saw that the starfish made him look like he was wearing a bra.
"Wah!" She shrieked and ran around, trying to rip the starfish from his shirt. Dakota and Anne Maria giggled while Jo downright laughed. Meanwhile, Dawn was oblivious to the whole thing as she was still meditating.
(Outhouse Confessional- We think Scott looks good with a bra)
Dawn- She's still meditating when she realizes the camera's on. "Oh, hello!" She chirped. "Our cabin is kind of loud sometimes, so I meditate in here."
Jo- "Other than spray face, the cabin doesn't seem half bad! There's only four of us, and Dawn always quiet, so it feels like there's only three of us." She chuckled. "It definitely could be worse, I could be Scott right now!" She laughed.
Scott- "For the record, I do not look good in a bra! Trust me, I would know!" He said looking at the camera. He realizes what he just said and was about to correct what he said but the camera goes to static.
(TDROTI Cabin – B, Brick, Scott)
"Stupid starfish!" Scott muttered. He ripped the sea stars from his shirt and threw them out the window, where he was sure no one would be.
"Hey, Scott, which bed do you want?" Brick asked.
"I don't care." Scott mumbled. He took the bed closest to the window and hopped onto the top bunk to relax. Not three seconds of relaxing later, and his bed collapsed on him. "Stupid rotting wood!" He complained.
B rushed over to aid him, but ended up grabbing all of the wood and supplies left by the pile of bed pieces and put them into a pile by the window. The inventor then grabbed several tools including a few nails, a screwdriver, and a hammer from inside his jacket, and began to go to work.
"Gee, thanks for helping me after falling from my collapsed bed!" Scott complained. B ignored him and continued his work. A few minutes later, it was done. B moved out of the way and revealed his creation.
A mini-fridge. "Excellent work cadet!" Brick exclaimed. "A solar powered mini-fridge! Useful, and green!" He chuckled.
(Outhouse Confessional- Wow, he's good!)
B- He doesn't say anything, he just stands there and grins at the camera. He polishes his nails with his breath and then rubs it on his jacket.
Scott- "How did he make a solar powered mini-fridge from wood?" He wondered.
(TDPI Cabin – Amy, Ella, Jasmine, Samey, Scarlett, Sky)
"Samey and I will share a bunk." Amy said. "It wouldn't be fair to stick her with any one of you."
"Why are you always such a bossy blond cow?!" Samey snapped at her sister. Not two minutes into the cabin and the two already began fighting.
"At least I've got a guy after me." Amy grinned. "That proves I'm better looking than you!"
"It's Rodney, he falls in love with everyone!" Samey pointed out. Amy growled at her and pulled her hair, Samey let out a shriek and kicked Amy in the shin.
"Oh calm down both of you!" Jasmine shouted. Amy and Samey both instantly stopped fighting and stared at the extremely tall Australian outback girl. "You're identical twins, neither one of you is prettier, it's all about personality, and right now, Samey seems to be nicer." Jasmine said, eying Amy. "So leave her alone!"
"We're still sharing a bunk though." Amy said. "And that's final." Samey sighed and took the bottom bunk while Amy took the one above her. "I don't want you thinking you're above me!" She explained.
Jasmine and Sky ended up sharing a bed, and Scarlett took the top of another one, sharing the bottom with Ella.
(Outhouse Confessional- Why is she so mean?)
Amy- "I always have the top bunk whenever we stay in a hotel, our family's cabin, even our own house! Samey did her audition tape on our parent's bed to make it look like she didn't have a sister, what a creep!"
Samey- "Ooh! I'm really considering slapping some sense into her! I'm glad Jasmine's on my side though, if we can start an alliance with Sky, maybe we could get Amy out of our faces for good!" Samey giggled, crossing her fingers.
Amy- "Samey's gonna regret tricking me with that poison apple last season! What is this? Snow White?!'
Ella- "Sooome daaaaay my prince will cooome!" She sang.
Jasmine- "Crikey! This could be bad for Samey! I'll have to talk to Sky about an alliance."
(TDPI – Dave, Max, Rodney, Topher)
The boy's side of the Pahkitew Island cabin could not have been more awkward. None of the guys really talked to each other much. Rodney was so big, that he got his own bed. Topher and Dave shared a bunk, and Max took his own bed.
"Well...this is awkward." Dave sighed.
(Outhouse Confessional- Indeed it is)
Topher- "Oh come on! With lame rooms like this, there won't be any drama! I need to think of something that'll show those dumb producers how great a host I can be, all the while, I need to be sure Chris doesn't suspect a thing!"
Scarlett- "Rehabilitated?" She chuckled. "Far from it! I hacked the telephone call between my prison guards and the producers telling them I was okay to compete. Those dorks are tied up on a flatbed truck, probably on their way to Siberia right now!" Scarlett cackled.
Max- "Last season, I tried to make an evil lair, but the bats were a tad scary. This season, I have toughened up, EVIL will get his evil lair, as all EVIL geniuses must have!" He cackled. "All I need is a new sidekick. Scarlett claims she's rehabilitated, but I don't believe her. I'll have to find someone new before turning back to her, because I do not want to do that!"
Max had left his cabin and was now out in the woods. He crept around a tree, making sure no one had followed him (not like anyone would). He inspected the cave in front of him and grinned wickedly.
"This will be the perfect cave for Evil's bidding!" Max cackled. "BWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!" His evil laugh echoed through the cave, which distorted it. "Ah phooey! Not again!" He whined.
"No matter, the evil laugh will come in due time." Max shrugged. "I just need some lights for my cave!" He said. The self proclaimed evil genius ran into the cave. There was a pause, and then Max let out a terrified, girly scream.
"WAAAAAAH!" He shrieked, and ran out of the cave as hundreds of bats flew after him.
(Outhouse Confessional- Pathetic isn't it?)
Max- "Maybe I'll let my new sidekick clear out the cave while I decorate it. But do not fret, the evil lair will happen! Just you wait! BWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!" He cackled. "Now that's an evil laugh! I'll have to see if I can do that again!"
Most of the contestants were relaxing in their cabins, taking a nap in their bed, or using the bathroom in the Communal Washrooms.
"Attention contestants!" Came Chris's annoyingly chipper voice over the intercom. "Please head to the Campfire pit in five minutes!"
"Great, it looks like it's time for him to ruin our day." Gwen sighed. "Not that it wasn't already ruined."
"I hate to see what he's planned for us today." Eva grumbled. "Better be something that's actually challenging! Diving off a cliff? Putting together a hot tub? Staying awake? Such dumb challenges! None of those played to my set of skills." Eva snarled. "This one better be good."
"I actually hope it's the opposite of what you just said." Gwen muttered.
"I wouldn't mind a challenge." Bridgette spoke up. "Preferably a water challenge, but hey, you can't have everything." She shrugged.
The girls were already outside, and were now heading for the campfire pit.
(Outhouse Confessional- What's in tore for them?)
Eva- "I never thought I'd say this, but I was a real witch to Bridgette. I didn't even know if she had voted for me! She probably did, but with good reason I suppose, and I took my anger out on her just because she was the last Killer Bass girl left." She sighed. "I wanna apologize to her, but I don't know how!"
The contestants were all now gathered at the campfire pit. They all sat on the stumps of wood, little did they know, several of them would be siting there again that very night.
"Greetings campers!" Chris said, still in his annoyingly chipper tone. "It's time to begin your first challenge! But first, I'll address a few things, and then we can get to the teams!"
"Alright, first off, I know many of you have been wondering where Owen is." Chris said. "He unfortunately didn't qualify for Unfinished Business, so we couldn't bring him in."
Izzy gasped, Duncan shrugged and Alejandro grinned happily. "However, since everyone needs a little Owen in their life, we did bring him back!" Chris grinned, several contestants were shocked, some were angered and others were downright happy. "...As and intern!"
"Crazy host says what?!" Izzy gaped.
"Hey! You're one to talk crazy girl!" Chris protested. "And yes, we're bringing him back as an intern, so he won't be gone for good! You can never have a season without Owen!" Chris shrugged.
"That is true." Duncan said. "He's made an appearance in every season except the last one."
"Anyhow, he won't be here until the elimination ceremony, so you'll probably either see him at dinner, or he'll be here to see you off if you're the unlucky fellow riding home on our new elimination device."
"I don't suppose you're going to tell us?" Jo asked. Chris shook his head. "Figures."
"Yay, Owen!" Izzy shouted.
"Alright, calm down, it's time to list off the teams for the first challenge." Chris said. "And remember, you'll only be with these people for this challenge, teams will change each Episode. Now then, team one is a simple mix. It will consist of Brick, Jo, Heather, Cody, Gwen, and Tyler!" Chris said. "I will also give you your team color, and your team animal. Team 1 will be the Orange Wolverines! That'll come in handy, but we'll cross that volcano when we get there."
Cody and Tyler high-fived, happy to be on the same team. Tyler nudged Cody, and the tech geek got what he was getting at.
"Hey Gwen." He said, waltzing over to her. He gave a sly (or what he thought was sly) grin and Gwen just rolled her eyes. "So, now that you've broken up with Trent and Duncan, maybe it's time you tried someone like me!"
"Ugh! You guys are always the same! You're always trying to hit on girls on the rebound!" Gwen growled. She shed no tears, but Cody could tell she was not happy with him. Gwen stormed away and Cody stood there, sighing as Tyler walked over and patted him on the shoulder.
(Outhouse Confessional- Was he Friend-zoned?)
Cody- "I guess Gwen's not ready for the Codemeister. Again." He sighed. "She'll want me eventually this season for sure!"
Gwen- "Cody is so insensitive! I broke up with Trent because of this show, and got eliminated! Then, having a relationship with Duncan got me eliminated too! Now that I'm single, I refuse to hook up with someone this season, it'll only end in heartbreak and elimination." She sighed.
Jo- "I'm not thrilled to have queen bee Heather or the original jock-strap on my team. Heather will just try to compete for leader, and Tyler's gonna screw up! With any luck, he'll trip on a rock and land in the volcano."
Heather- "Tyler's gonna trip up, Jo's gonna compete for leader, Brick might be useful, Cody's just gonna try to hit on Gwen the whole time, and Gwen's probably just gonna sulk the whole time." Heather summed up. "Yup, this challenge is gonna go great." She said, sarcastically rolling her eyes.
The respected members of team one headed over into their group and awaited further instructions. "Team 2 will consist of Jasmine, Scott, Courtney Sky, Duncan, and Trent!" Chris read off. "You will be the Purple Loons."
Jasmine and Sky high-fived each other as Samey looked upon them and sighed. "Don't worry Samey, we'll be on the same team next time." Jasmine assured her, patting her on the shoulder.
Courtney was the least thrilled of all of them. "Why do I have to be on a team with both of my ex's!" Courtney complained. "I hate both of them! That one won't forgive me for something I didn't do, and the other one is a smelly punk!" Courtney shouted, referring to Scott and Duncan.
"Exactly, it stirs up the drama, and this season's all about bringing the drama together!" Chris said cheerfully, making Courtney give a deadpan stare at him.
(Outhouse Confessional- Methinks Courtney isn't happy)
Courtney- "Figures Chris stick me on a team with both of my ex's! With any luck, that tall Australian girl...Jasmine I think it is, and that Olympic gymnast, Sky, can bring our team to victory so Scott and Duncan can't vote me off! But once we're no longer on a team, Jasmine and Sky have to go because they're big threats!"
Jasmine- "Yeah, there'll probably be a bit of trouble with the whole, Duncan/Scott/Courtney love triangle going on, but me and Sky can carry this team to victory!"
Trent- "Of course no one remembers Trent!" He sighed. "All I'm known for now is getting dumped by Gwen and having sappy songs."
Trent walked over and stood next to Duncan in their group. Duncan looked at him questionably. "Dude, what are you doing in our group? You're not on this team." Duncan said.
"Yes I am! None of you care about me enough to even listen that Chris called my name! No one gives a hoot about Trent anymore!" Trent snapped.
"Sorry dude, I was eying Courtney to see if she'd blow when she found out Scott and I were on her team, guess I didn't hear your name." Duncan shrugged.
"Of course you didn't." Trent sighed, glaring at the back of Duncan's head.
"Alright, team 3 will be Geoff, Izzy, Noah, Ella, Dave, and Dakota." Chris said. "You'll be the Blue Bears."
Geoff, being the happy-go-lucky guy he was, let out a whoop, not caring who was on his team, just enjoying it. "Sweet! We'll be like one big happy family!" He chuckled.
"I think you mean one big dysfunctional family." Noah remarked. "And it's only for one challenge dude, no need to get super excited."
Ella, being the happy-go-lucky girl she was, let out a song, also not caring who was on her team. "I agree with Geoff, this will most definitely be delightful!" She giggled.
"Izzy's ready to take on anything!" Izzy cackled. She beat Noah's head like a bongo. "Since Owen's not here, Izzy will use your head as a bongo."
"For once, I actually wish that fart machine was here." Noah sighed. He, Geoff, Izzy and Ella gathered into a huddle, while Dave sulked after them. Dakota sighed and stood by the others, still standing a taller than all of them.
(Outhouse Confessional- Dakota goes Dakotazoid!)
Dakota- "After just getting out of the radiation lab, I managed to get my hair back, but now I'm still a full head taller than everyone! At least I'd make a good runway model!" She said, striking a pose. "Besides, Geoff's cool, and Ella seems nice, although slightly annoying, at least they won't judge."
"Team 4 is another simple group! LeShawna, Harold, Alejandro, Bridgette, Ezekiel, and DJ!" Chris said. "You will be the Yellow Beavers!" Chris chuckled at the name.
"Chris, are you trying to put me on a team of people who hate me?" Alejandro asked. As he said this, LeShawna and Bridgette were rolling up their sleeves, the former smacking a fist into her palm.
"Of course I am!" Chris said, not even trying to deny it. "Wasn't it obvious? Maybe I'll have to make it more known next time." He shrugged.
(Outhouse Confessional- Anti-Alejandro Club!)
Alejandro- "Of course Chris would put me on a team of people that hate me! That man's really getting on my nerves, I still haven't been able win a lawsuit against him, even after he burned me in lava!"
LeShawna- "It's Alejandro's fault that me and most of my close friends got eliminated back in World Tour, and there's no way I'm about to forget him! Not after the way he treated Bridgette and I!"
Harold- "I can tell my Luscious LeShawna isn't too please about Alejandro being on our team, and frankly, I don't care for him either, so I won't hold back my chocolate goddess from giving him one to many slaps to the face."
Ezekiel- "Maybe Bridgette's the first one I can apoo'logize to, eh! I knoow she's dating Geoff, but I really like her! Maybe if I explain to her that I've changed, she'll be friends with me!"
DJ was holding LeShawna back from doing some serious damage to Alejandro while Bridgette couldn't bring herself to do it. "I really hate him, but I can't be that mean." She sighed and Harold nodded.
"I've learned that holding grudges is never a good thing. Unless of course you're holding a grudge against Duncan." Harold seethed. "That jerk's been a bully to me since day one!"
"I know what you mean, I never really liked that punk." Bridgette admitted. "He didn't look very nice on the first day when he was giving that poor deer a painful-looking noogie."
"C'mon DJ! Let go, I just wanna slap some sense int'a him for five minutes!" LeShawna said. "Please?"
DJ shook his head. "Sorry, but I'm a pacifist, plus, I don't like fights." DJ admitted. "Maybe later when I'm not around." He winked. LeShawna grinned and promised not to slap Alejandro when DJ wasn't around.
"Alright, love the Alejandro hate by the way." Chris chuckled. "Team 5 will consist of Eva, Max, Scarlett, Topher, Katie, and Sadie! You'll be the Green snakes, naturally."
"Ew, I don't like snakes." Katie cringed.
"Oh, I know right!" Sadie nodded. "Remember that time we had to go camping with our class in Elementary school? The guys were fishing and one of them found a snake!"
"Omigosh! I so remember that!" Katie agreed. "And that annoying kid Dwayne chased us around with it! That was so scary!" She said and Sadie nodded.
"Interesting story, now could you shut up!" Eva growled. Katie and Sadie stood a good distance from Eva and kept quiet, not wanting to get yelled at again.
"Excellent teams Chris, love the names!" Topher complimented. "You're such a good host!"
"Thank you, Topher, you're much more likeable when you're not trying to steal my job." Chris snapped. Topher grinned sheepishly and kept quiet.
"Hardly, who would want to be on a team with Tweedledee and Tweedledum, a fitness gorilla, a Chris-wannabe, and Scarlett, the worst sidekick ever!" Max shouted.
Much to his, and everyone else's surprise, Scarlett didn't even look mad. "Do not worry Max, that was the old me, I'm now rehabilitated and much n-nicer." Scarlett said as happily as she could, her eye twitching slightly.
"Scarlett...why is your eye twitching?" Max asked.
"Oh, it's just a...um, eye infection, nothing to worry about." Scarlett said casually. Max shrugged and walked off to join his new group.
(Outhouse Confessional- Twitch-twitch)
Scarlett- "It took all my energy to keep from crying out in frustration and mauling him like a bear! He is the bane of my existence! If we lose this, he's so out of here!" She snarled.
Max- "Scarlett is no doubt acting nicer so she can become my sidekick again. I knew she'd fail; trying to overthrow her boss, what a loon! I might let her be my sidekick again, but it's gonna take a lot to convince me again!"
Topher- "Now that Chris thinks I'm just another Chris fan again, he won't have a clue what I'm up to! This time, I'm going after Chef's phone! If I can contact the real producers, they'll love me for sure, then I'll be the one laughing at other people's expense!" he cackled.
"Alright, our final group is team 6! It'll consist of Rodney, Amy, Samey, Anne Maria, B and Dawn!" Chris announced. "You'll be the Red Raccoons."
"Yuck, raccoons are just big fury rats!" Anne Maria scoffed.
"I think raccoons are cute!" Dawn giggled. Suddenly, as if on cue, a raccoon scampered over to them. Anne Maria flinched, not wanting to get near the rabid animal. Dawn crouched down and tickled the varmint under its chin and it let out a happy series of chatters. "Hello little creature of the earth." She greeted.
The raccoon nuzzled up to her, and then scampered off to find food. Dawn stood up and walked over next to Anne Maria and B. Amy and Samey followed with Rodney behind them.
(Outhouse Confessional- Raccoon Revenge or Varmint Vengeance?)
Anne Maria- "Yuck, that Dawn chick seriously creeps me out! What's with her and aura reading and liking gross, giant rats." She cringed.
Dawn- "This season I intend to help the poor creatures of Pahkitew Island. Chris said he replaced the robots with live animals this season, so I'll be able to be surrounded by friends." She giggled. "Oh, and B's cool too, I guess I'll act as his translator."
Samey- Why couldn't I be on a team with Jasmine and not Amy? Ugh, I swear, if Chris puts me on her team each time, I'm going to freak! Of course, if we're on the same team each time, we'll be bound to lose at least once, and then maybe, just maybe, Amy will be gone, and I won't have to pretend to be her!" Samey said hopefully.
"Alright, you've had lunch, you have your rooms, your teams, and your team spirit, and by that, I mean your colors and animal." Chris said. "Now that everything's been covered or taken care of, we can get to our challenge."
"What's it gonna be this time?" Eva guessed. "Roping ponies? Sleep-a-thon? A game of baseball?"
(Outhouse Confessional- America's Pastime!)
Eva- "Way back in TDI, the challenges were seriously lame! I didn't compete in TDA or TDWT, and none of those challenges looked difficult either! Why couldn't I have been in Revenge of the Island or Pahkitew Island? Those seasons would have been much more favorable to my skills! If Chris has lame challenges this season, I'm gonna flip!"
Noah- "After six seasons of so-called 'excitement', I'm surprised Chris and the producers haven't run out of ideas! With any luck, Chris will embarrass himself in front of the nation when he runs out of challenge ideas half-way through the season." Noah grinned.
"No, it will not be any of those." Chris corrected. "This season, your first challenge will be much like season 1!"
"So we're jumping off a cliff? Again?" Noah asked. "We did that in season one and others did it in season five! I can't believe you're running out of challenge ideas already! I expected much later in the season." Noah shook his head.
"Not exactly, you'll be jumping, but not necessarily off a cliff." Chris grinned. He and Chef exchanged grins and giggles and tried to keep quiet.
"If we're not jumping off a cliff, then what are we supposed to jump off of, a diving board? Because we already did that too!" Gwen remarked.
"Nope." Chris said. Before anyone else could guess anything, Chris pressed a red button on a remote control.
"Oh no, not the remote control of doom!" Izzy shrieked. She coward behind Dakota, which was very un-Izzy like. Everyone was afraid of what would happen as well and were bracing for impact. But nothing happened.
"What's going on McLean?" Duncan asked.
'Wait for it..." Chris grinned.
The contestants did wait for it, but still, nothing happened. Chris looked surprised and angrily knocked his remote against the oil drum. Suddenly, the ground began rumbling and the contestants began to scream.
DJ, Katie and Sadie all fainted while others like Dave and Izzy ran around in panic. "Chris McLean has doomed us all! He's released the Kraken!" Izzy screamed.
"Earthquake!" Dave cried.
"Nope, volcano!" Chris grinned. And he was right. There was a sudden burst of land shooting out from the forest across the island. "While we replaced the robotic animals with real ones again, the island is still mechanical." Chris explained.
The ground continued to rumble as the volcano soared higher and higher into the air. Dave and Izzy stopped running around screaming and stared in awe at the land-form. Finally, the volcano stopped high up into the air and the ground quit its trembling.
"You mean we're jumping into a volcano?!" Courtney shouted.
"Nooo!" Alejandro wailed. "Not again! I can't risk my beautiful face again!"
"Don't worry, I was planning to ruin it later anyway!" LeShawna grinned, slapping a fist into her palm again.
"Now, now, no fighting just yet!" Chris said. "The challenge will be explained once we return, here, on Total...Drama...Unfinished Business!" Chris announced, giving his signature grin.
"I'm really starting to hate that smile of his." Harold sighed.
How will the contestants fare jumping into an active volcano? Will Chris get sued, can he get sued? Will LeShawna rearrange Alejandro's face before the challenge begins? And can Ezekiel apologize to Bridgette and not look like a sexist jerk? Find out in Part 2!
~A/N~ I hope you liked the first episode! And just because Owen isn't competing doesn't mean I don't have some surprises or hilarious moments up my sleeve! Also, if your favorite contestants like Mike, Zoey or Cameron aren't competing, don't worry, they'll appear in my Bonus episodes! I won't be doing an Aftermath, but I'll be doing something very similar!
As for the characters that are competing, I hope I picked a good bunch! I tried to choose characters that are popular like Heather, Duncan and Gwen, along with characters that didn't really give a chance, all of which have something or other left to do with the show! Many relationship problems will be resolved, or started, as well as some other Plot twists and other surprises! :)
One more quick thing before I send you on your way, I just want to remind you all that chapters will be posted about once every month, maybe twice depending on how much work I get done.
[1]- One of my favorite authors of fanfiction is The Kobold Necromancer, and his stories are amazing! His two best known are Total Drama Battlegrounds and Total Drama Comeback, both of which involve the original cast, the former having 22 new campers competing alongside them. The point is, he's been inactive forever, so I've decided to put several Easter eggs and such within this story, dedicated to him!
[2]- The Cheesy salesman was a gag in Total Drama Comeback, and I loved it, so I thought I'd bring him in any time Chris cut to an unexpected commercial break! If you don't like him, just skip it. ;)
[3]- Pardon my rhyming, I've never been good at that! So if Ella's singing sucks, then that's why! XD
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