FreeKiwi
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Poll: Which Demyx/Zexion story would you like to see once "Guilty Conscience" concludes? Vote Now!
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Joined 06-23-04, id: 616704, Profile Updated: 02-16-13
Author has written 19 stories for Kingdom Hearts.

Alone, she sleeps in the shirt of man,
With my three wishes clutched in her hand.


Wanna play Words with Friends with me?
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General

Name: Francis (Слава) K.
Age: 21
Sex: Masculine
Major/Minor: Triple Major: International Studies (concentration in comparative literature), English (concentration in creative writing), and Classics
Dual Minor: Linguistics and Russian Studies
(I'm never graduating)

Music I Really Like:
Kid Cudi
The Octopus Project
Death Cab for Cutie
Ratatat
Skrillex
Motion City Soundtrack
Vampire Weekend
Say Anything
Tokyo Police Club
Phoenix
The Postal Service
Barenaked Ladies
Deadmau5


The Importance of Appreciating Authors:
It isn't a secret that much of ffnet is asinine malarkey. This generally displeases me when I go to sort through fanfiction, but I typically ignore it. However, it has come to my attention that much of this inexcusable twaddle has a colossal number of reviews. This seems atypical and erroneous.
So, my beloved readers, profile stalkers, and friends, I exhort you to recognize that a lack of reviews on a story does not mean the story is shit. It means it is severely underappreciated or misunderstood by the swarm of mindless nits that seem to frequent ffnet. I don't normally voice my opinion in a serious manner (because of backlash), but it sincerely disconcerts me to see fabulous writers wind up jaded because of a lack of positive reception.
Do your part and review. If you read something and you like it, review. I know, I know -- I hate writing reviews. They're awkward and the stupid review box will glitch out and you never know what to say, but if you don't review, an author won't know if they should keep writing. And if you like that author or the way they write, say so. The number of abysmal authors greatly outweighs the number of exceptional authors, so please give your support.

I'm retiring my soapbox now.


Stories (Non-one-shots)

Axel's Fables: Axel thinks Aesop taught decent lessons in his fables, but the redhead is willing to bet he could do better. What good are fables that teach things like “attempt not impossibilities” or “little friends may prove great friends” anyway? Times are different from when Aesop lived and Axel thinks it’s time for a new set of fables. All of which will be authored by himself, of course, because he’s an expert on love, life, and what truly matters.
That, and Roxas Badcock promised to marry him if he gets his book published.
-AxelxRoxas- -SoraxRiku- -AxelxDemyx- -ZexionxDemyx-
Now successfully completed.

Guiltly Conscience: Question: How do you take revenge on someone who’s smart enough to figure out what you’re up to?
A. Promise the pool boy you’ll finance his music shop if he pretends to be Zexion’s conscience.
B. Get everyone you know to help with your plan for revenge.
C. Convince Zexion he’s got six months to turn his life around or he’ll die.
D. All of the above.
-Demyx x Zexion- -Axel x Roxas- -Riku x Sora-

Smoking Lamps: Roxas hates his family. He hates that his mother and father are separated. He hates his mundane job. He hates his girlfriend. He hates being gay. He hates that his best friend is dying of cancer. He hates, and hates, and hates, and one day his girlfriend buys him a Hookah pipe to cheer him up. And even though he doesn't smoke, he decides to light up anyway because it makes him sad to see his beard cry. So he breathes in and then he breathes out. And before he can accurately comprehend what the fuck is going on, a drop-dead gorgeous genie named Axel is sitting on his bed, yammering about three wishes. And before Roxas can wish his beard away and his life back to normal, Axel tacks on the addendum: "But I'm binding us together and if you make your three wishes, we'll both be stuck in that Hookah pipe for eternity."
-Axel x Roxas- -Demyx x Zexion- -Roxas x Namine- -(Tiny Bit)Riku x Sora-

January 5th, 2012

Okay, so... GC is almost done! To me, it still feels campy and at the end of the story, there will be a note about the last chapter and why I had trouble writing it and all that good stuff. Part of the trouble was, of course, time, but most of it was actually writing it. And I would just post a note here about it, but I don't wanna give anything away so... Anyway -- it's nearly done. I have to polish it a little bit, but then I'll be sending it to my beta either on Sunday, the 6th of January, or Monday, the 7th of January. I'll update my profile when I do.

The next chapter of SL is also almost done, but I suspect it won't be ready to post until after the 9th of January.


Before I forget...Do any of you use GoodReads? It's a website that lets you catalog all the books you've read, the books you want to read, and the books that you're currently reading. There's also communities you can join, friends you can add, reviews you can post, and all that good stuff. GoodReads will also do free raffles where they give away books that are newly released. My sister actually won one of these books not too long ago.
If you don't use GoodReads and you read a lot, use it. It's fun. And if you spend a lot of time on GoodReads, add me. We can discuss literature, recommend books to each other, and all that kind of crap. My username is GoodReader.

The next story I'll probably be posting is a Riku/Sora story. I mentioned it (maybe?) in a note for SL? Or maybe I mentioned it here. But I'm still working out the plot points for it and I'm trying to get the first 3 chapters written before I post anything. I keep changing the first chapter because I keep changing the potential story. The problem with publishing chapter-by-chapter on the internet is that I can't go back and change things which is why I sometimes end up with plot holes or factual errors. And, for this new story, I don't want there to be errors.

Okay, so.. PMs... I'm getting to it. I promise. I know I've been sent a lot of PMs. And I'm going to answer them. I really am. I know I keep saying that, but it's on my mind all the time. Just hold tight, folks.


Some Facts:

A. I think love is just one big ego-trip.
B. I have a beta (Aindel S. Druida).
C. I box (but my pet rat is still dead).
D. Russian is my first language.
E. When writing in first person, I consistently screw up the tense.
F. I had to sing the alphabet song to remember what came after E.
G. The further away my iPhone gets from the current generation, the more it starts to suck.
H. I hate it when people "favorite" a story but never review it.
I. I hate writing reviews.
J. I have a bad habit of saying "well" or "I mean" at the beginning of every sentence.
K. I loathe social networking because it allows people to pass judgment and draw wildly incorrect conclusions about someone they've never even meet (and then won't meet because of their preconceived notions / misconceptions).
L: I also loathe social networking because it makes people anti-social and really ignorant (but it makes them feel like they're very social and very smart).
M: I don't smoke or drink, or do anything even remotely noteworthy.
N. My stories aren't nearly as long as they seem because I do a "Review Response" section and my author's notes go on for miles.
O: Every job I've had has ended in a mutual agreement in which I quit as my boss is about to fire me.
P: I have a peanut intolerance, I am lactose intolerant, and a peskaterian.
Q: I have nothing pierced because I can't box with piercings.
R: I love my cat more than I love myself.
S: I'm getting 3 degrees because I don't know what I want to do in life, and because 3 degrees will make a pretty sturdy shelter for when I'm homeless.
T: My ex-boyfriends are сумасшедший лохи и они будут обижаться, когда они переводят это.
U: I'm really terrible with money (I spend a lot and don't keep track).
V: I think it would be cool to publish, but I also think it would be cool to be a superhero.
W: I don't have anything to write here, but I'm lazy and don't want to have to change the letters for the last 4 facts.
X: I'm tired of seeing the plot, "Axel/Roxas is bad, but then Roxas/Axel comes in to Axel/Roxas' life and changes him for the better."
Z: I think Catullus is awesome even if it takes me hours to translate a few lines of his poetry.
AA: I sound pretty eloquent when I write, but when I speak I sound like a retarded third-grader with Tourette's.
BB: I think AkumaStrife is the best.
CC: I also think sea-salt kisses is the best.

And that's about as interesting as I get.


"Forsan et haec olim meminisse iuvabit."
"Ревность убивает любовь, или любовь убивает ревность."

Transatlanticism - when the geographic barriers between two people reflect, or parallel, the emotional obstacles of the relationship or individual.

"They carry grief around like a woman carries her extra weight: beset by self-doubt and ugly feelings, yet look content and worry free so as not to draw attention to it."
-Tentative by AkumaStrife (excellent writer)

"Why do you care what people think? They'll like you. They'll hate you. They'll think whatever they want to think and then you die."
-Lois, MiM

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Quick and the Dead by The mental patient reviews
In a world where the dead don't always stay down, more things are let loose upon the world than the undead. Survival is not the only thing we must face even during complete societal collapse. It's not even the worst thing. (Zombies, and Akuroku. Rated T; for sexual themes and violence. Initial chapters rewritten, story unchanged. Enjoy.)
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,503 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 6/6/2016 - Published: 11/20/2010 - Axel, Roxas
Vulnerabilities by AkumaStrife reviews
Both men are a mystery, guarded so heavily behind their protective walls. But it is behind closed doors that they allow the armor to fall, learning to trust in the familiar. /For FreeKiwi/
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 823 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/8/2012 - Leon/Squall L., Cloud S. - Complete
Noodle by For Lesprieve reviews
Demyx wakes up in a strange bathroom, handcuffed and plagued with amnesia. Zexion is the disgruntled employee who finds him...Zemyx
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 26,393 - Reviews: 83 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 100 - Updated: 10/5/2011 - Published: 6/25/2010 - Demyx, Zexion
Don't Forget I Love You by mumblybee reviews
AU. Roxas wakes up on the sidewalk covered in bruises and can't remember anything. Luckily for him, Axel has a penchant for taking in strays. Axel also has a penchant for insanity, but we'll get to that later. Domesticity and angst and humor, oh my!
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 38,600 - Reviews: 120 - Favs: 97 - Follows: 104 - Updated: 6/13/2011 - Published: 12/7/2010 - Axel, Roxas
That Song on the Radio by KokoroNoKage reviews
Loving Kairi was like a romance novel: perfect and happy and predictable. Loving Riku was like...finding out you had the power to save all the worlds with a magic key. Sometimes, it just happened.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,705 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/13/2010 - Riku, Sora - Complete
Highwind Auto Repair by AkumaStrife reviews
What happens in the garage doesn't really stay in the garage. Because honestly, everyone knows Cloud isn't exactly talking about motorcycles anymore when he growls at Leon to 'Shut up and just ride' /AU/another smutty gift fic for smilebot/
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 833 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 4 - Published: 10/6/2010 - Leon/Squall L., Cloud S. - Complete
Gratuity by AkumaStrife reviews
They give and they take /smut for smilebot/
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 990 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/24/2010 - Cloud S., Leon/Squall L. - Complete
Tentative by AkumaStrife reviews
Because their relationship is a fragile thing /50 Sentences/Cleon/
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,672 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 16 - Published: 5/24/2010 - Cloud S., Leon/Squall L. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Smoking Lamps reviews
She bought Roxas a hookah pipe to cheer him up. He smoked the red shisha hoping to make himself sick. The summoning of Axel, the unconventional genie threatening to trap Roxas in the pipe if he makes three wishes, was just a really unfortunate byproduct.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Humor/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 4 - Words: 46,877 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 67 - Updated: 11/9/2012 - Published: 12/3/2011 - Axel, Roxas
Guilty Conscience reviews
How do rich kids enact revenge on Zexion? They convince the pool boy to pretend to be Zexion's conscience. The pool boy convinces Zexion he has to change his ways or he'll die. Everyone else? They just have to keep a straight face. -Zemyx- -AR- -SR-
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 118,554 - Reviews: 299 - Favs: 180 - Follows: 212 - Updated: 6/5/2012 - Published: 2/5/2011 - Demyx, Zexion
Axel's Fables reviews
"You know what, Axel? If you can write a book and get it published, I'll marry you." It's too bad he didn't think the deal through. It's too bad he never thought Axel would rework Aesop's fables. It's too bad Axel is a fable-writing god. -AxelxRoxas-
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 176,823 - Reviews: 498 - Favs: 566 - Follows: 250 - Updated: 10/17/2011 - Published: 6/17/2010 - Axel, Roxas - Complete
A Dreidel in My Stocking reviews
He's dressed as an elf, Jingle Jammies don't actually jingle, Santa won't stop calling him Hitler, and that obnoxious Jew boy keeps insisting they say 'Happy Holidays.' Demyx didn't know working as a Mall Elf could be so dramatic. Or sexy. -Zemxy-
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16,844 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 114 - Follows: 4 - Published: 12/24/2010 - Demyx, Zexion - Complete
I Guess That's Love reviews
Ever been between a rock and a hard place? No? Well, ever been forced to choose between your dignity and mindless f-wording with the love of your life? It's sort of like that. -Fluff n' smut- -AxelxRoxas-
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16,301 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 172 - Follows: 8 - Published: 6/15/2010 - Axel, Roxas - Complete
And he Claims I'm Forcing him to do This reviews
-Smutty- Riku doesn't really see the problem. So him and Sora occasionally get together and do things to each other's bodies. Is that really such a bad thing? Well, Sora thinks so. After all, he's claiming that Riku forces him to do it. -Not rape-
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,629 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 192 - Follows: 12 - Published: 5/14/2010 - Riku, Sora - Complete
Bumble reviews
Kairi told Sora to go see a doctor, or it would get worse. But the scratching and banging at his closet door? Well, Sora's convinced it's a little more than early psychosis.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Humor/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,543 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/17/2008 - Complete
I've Got You reviews
His tongue dips into the small hole of my belly-button and I lurch slightly. "It's snowing. We won't be in school tomorrow."
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,553 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/9/2008 - Complete
I Love You This Much reviews
I didn't understand why he had been so upset over something so small. I mean, what was so sad about the death of a rabbit?
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,398 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/24/2008 - Complete
Kitty's Apartment reviews
Leon reaches out to touch Sora and I tell him no. I tell him no and then I say 'please, Leon, not yet.'
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,181 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 11 - Published: 12/26/2007 - Complete
Sorry, Mom reviews
My bad, Sora. I guess next time it can be your bad. [RS][AU][HIV]
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,933 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/9/2007 - Complete
Fifteen in Pirate Years reviews
[RS][Oneshot] Sora shook his head, “No, no. Fifteen in pirate years means… well… it means I'm fifteen in pirate years.”
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,177 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 3 - Published: 4/9/2006 - Complete
Undone reviews
[Oneshot] The things that are new are always to be broken first. It's one of Newton's Laws.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,381 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/1/2005 - Complete
Pretty Little Boy reviews
[RS][TwoShot] It was one of those obscure things. One of those things people shake their heads at, but never, ever really talked about.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,017 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 5/22/2005 - Published: 5/15/2005 - Complete
Moon Dance reviews
[Oneshot][RS] The word dance doesn't exactly MEAN dance. Well, not to Riku, anyway.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 931 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/20/2005 - Complete
Cut Up Boy reviews
[RS][Oneshot] It's always the person everyone least suspects.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 968 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/7/2005 - Complete
Wreck reviews
[Oneshot] I bought the liquor... but my best friend paid for it.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,209 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 7 - Published: 4/24/2005 - Complete
Sing Me To Sleep reviews
[RS] [Oneshot] Birds fly high above the seas and the land and the people. And one day, I'm going to fly too.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 776 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/17/2005 - Complete
Loneliest Number reviews
[RS] [Oneshot] Once there was a boy who lived and died one million times.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,065 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 3 - Published: 4/16/2005 - Complete