usefulobjecthide bio
 Author has written 3 stories for Lord of the Rings, and Hobbit. Sometimes I write dumb stories about Orcs. I'm a slow updater but I'm determined to finish what I start so don't take long stretches between updates as abandonment. I'm just really busy with real life stuff. I'm also on AO3, where I occasionally have stories too...uh, "mature" really isn't the word, but I can't post them here. My tumblr is here, also not work safe. I draw stuff sometimes. |
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Mock My Innocence by Hautuumaa reviews
An Elf with a thing for Orcs finds an Orc with a thing for Elves. Just enjoying their good luck would be too easy, so they begin a snail's pace trek across Middle-earth with a group of Orcs as strange as they are annoying.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 76 - Words: 244,010 - Reviews: 205 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 4/27 - Published: 3/26/2013 - Orc, Elf
Orcbrat by The Lauderdale reviews
Orcs killed Maevyn's family and took her with them as a captive. It was never intended she survive. CHAPTER 35 UP: Leni thinks of trees. ALSO! Grushak versus…
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 35 - Words: 154,801 - Reviews: 417 - Favs: 304 - Follows: 292 - Updated: 2/3/2019 - Published: 1/17/2003 - Uruk-hai, Orc
A Different Bundle of Joy by Zoop reviews
One-shot, post-War of the Ring. Halloween holiday story just for fun. :) Orcs happen upon a woman giving birth alone.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,911 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/28/2015 - Orc - Complete
The Stone Orc by Zoop reviews
One-shot for Basement Dweller's Prompt. A young Goblin goes on a journey to learn the answer to a riddle.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,050 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/25/2015 - Orc, OC - Complete
Night Flowers by Zoop reviews
One-shot. An Elf maiden flits off to a secret, forbidden liaison. Speed writing exercise: Vague concept to complete in 90 minutes. Dedicated to Auset's Tears; she knows why. :)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,030 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 5 - Published: 5/29/2014 - Orc, Elf, OC - Complete
Isengard's Deceit: The Death of Uglûk by Zoop reviews
The ponderings of Uglûk, left for dead by Éomer on the edge of Fangorn Forest. COMPLETE
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,497 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 5 - Published: 3/1/2013 - Uruk-hai, Uglúk - Complete
Patronus by FugueState reviews
The children know his name, but they don't say it. To say his name is to call him, and you only do that if you really mean it... AU
Watchmen - Rated: T - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 389 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/5/2011 - Walter K./Rorschach - Complete
Slouching Toward Gondolin by fileg reviews
Riding to Gondolin in the belly of an iron beast
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,089 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/2/2003
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .
Vultures Rush In reviews
After Mordor falls, a hunter from the Misty Mountains joins a displaced Isengard Uruk in hopes of claiming some of the loot in the ruins of Sauron's domain. Along the journey they develop unexpected (totally expected) feelings. Can they get the big cash money wad or will they die like pigs in hell? Slash.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 33,172 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 10/23/2019 - Published: 2/2/2014 - Orc, Uruk-hai
Cleaning House reviews
Ushûl's new lair comes with a free surprise haunting.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,127 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Published: 10/19/2019 - Orc - Complete
