I've decided to change my bio. It's been about a year since I first wrote it and my life has change in some extreme ways in that time. First of all, I no longer live in New York. I joined the Army and am currently stationed in Monterey, California. Secondly, I'm no longer eighteen. Imagine that. I'm now twenty, looking forward to drinking legally. My greatest curse is that I have yet to meet a girl that meets all of my romantic prerequisites. There aren't that many, but girls have hard time living up to my ridiculous expectations.
The girl that I'm going to someday marry must(In no particular order):
1. Have read and liked the Harry Potter series. Yes, I'm twenty, but Harry Potter kicks my ass.
2. Have read and liked either the Wheel of time series and or the Lord of the Rings.
3. She has to think the the Hobbit was decent but when compared to Tolkien's other works, it sucks.
4. She has to have at least one brother. Girls have to know how to act around guys. I hate when I bring a girl around my friends and the testosterone wilts the poor thing.
5. She must be opionionated but not argumentative.
6. Looks are not important, but she has to be comfortable with herself, physically.
7. She can't care too much about what other people think about her.
8. Must have romantic opinions about love and marriage. I'm sick of girls like this.
Girl: "What's the point?"
Me: "What do you mean?"
Girl: "Why does anyone get married these days?"
Me: "Maybe they're in love."
Girl: "That's not enough, these days. Why do you think people are getting divorced in record numbers? Love is losing power to modernization."
Me: (Stunned look on my face.) "Are you crazy?"
Girl: "No. Why do people get married only to get divorced?"
Me: (Heavy sigh.) Goodbye.
I've read too many books where love conquers everything, so I think I'm ruined on settling for anything less than perfect. I'll find her. She's out there, waiting for me.
Yeah, I promise that I'm a guy. And I'm not gay, just romantic. Well, I'm romantic on paper at least. Whenever I'm around girls, my foot is so far down my throat that I can barely speak let alone be romantic. It's my greatest curse, knowing what to say and being able to get it out.