Hi, my name is Michael. I'm Brazilian. I'm a dude.

I'm a Light Atheist, which means that, while I don't personaly believe in any Gods, I don't deny the possibility that I may be wrong (don't mistake that for Agnosticism, they are two completely different things).

#IStandWithGrantWard

Hero, villain, something in between, I don't care. Ward is the best character in AOS and I stand by that.

#RIPWard/Hive/FrameWard

My Four Biggest Passions: Comedy, Animation, Superheroes, and Horror.

My Top 3 Favorite Movies: Jurassic Park, The Mask, and Men In Black.

My Top 5 Favorite Horror Movie Franchises: Saw, Final Destination, Scream, A Nightmare On Elm Street, and The Omen/Paranormal Activity (tie).

My Top 5 Favorite Non-Horror Movie Franchises: The Marvel Cinematic Universe, Indiana Jones, Jurassic Park (again), Toy Story, and James Bond.

My Top 5 Favorite Drama Movies: The Green Mile, The Shawshank Redemption, Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind, Brokeback Mountain, and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.

My Favorite Books: A Series of Unfortunate Events, Harry Potter, anything written by Stephen King, anything written by Dan Brown, anything written by Luís Fernando Veríssimo, Captain Underpants, The Hitchiker's Guide to The Galaxy, Diary of a Wimpy Kid, Sherlock Holmes.

My Favorite Live-Action TV Series: The X-Files, Lost, 24, Monk, Get Smart, Chuck, Fringe, Agent Carter, ALF, Supernatural, Smallville, Two and A Half Men, Friends, MacGyver, House M.D., My Name Is Earl, Psych, Dexter.

My Favorite Animated Series: The Simpsons, South Park, Futurama, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Dexter's Laboratoy, KND, Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends, Powerpuff Girls, Tiny Toons, Pinky and The Brain, Courage The Cowardly Dog, Angry Beavers, Rocko's Modern Life, Invader Zim, Phineas and Ferb, The Spectacular Spider-Man, Adventure Time, Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes, Batman: The Animated Series, The Mask, Men In Black: The Series, Wacky Races, Spongebob Squarepants, Fairly Oddparents, Danny Phantom, Kim Possible.

Movies I'm Looking Forward To: Captain Marvel, Jigsaw, The Incredibles 2, Toy Story 4, Ant-Man and The Wasp.

Currently Reading: The Bourne Identity by Robert Ludlum

A Question to All Villains: Why Don't You Just Cut Off Their Limbs?

I understand that shooting people is too underwhelming for some villains who want more elaborated deaths for their enemies, and there are some characters that you need alive to interrogate/keep hostage. But why don't you just cut off their limbs? Want a slow and agonizing death? Just put torso guy in the middle of your Death Trap (tm) and watch as he patheticaly tries to move as the saw/laser/shark/whatever draws close to put an end to his misery. Need to interrogate them? They don't need their limbs to talk! Think of Black Widow in The Avengers and Drew Barrymore in Charlie's Angels: They were both tied to chairs and still manged to escape and kick the evil guards' asses. Had the bad guy did the smart thing and cut off their legs and arms, neither of them would be able to kick anybody's ass. You wouldn't even have to tie them or lock them in any way, just let them in the floor, they aren't going anywhere.

And if a friend tries to rescue them, he's gonna be in trouble because Torso Hostage (tm) won't be able to follow him, leaving him with two options: Go back and forsake his friend, or carry the dead weight around, which will not only slow him down but make him unable to use a weapon making it really easy for your minions to neutralize them.

So, next time you capture the hero(ine) or any of his(her) friends, cut their limbs off! You have nothing to lose, except a shot at redemption which, considering that you're evil, you probably don't give a shit about.

UPCOMING PROJECT: "Pienal Destination" an Eight Chapter Long MLP:FiM/Final Destination crossover, in which Pinkie Pie's 'Pinkie Sense' saves her and her friends' lives, but now she must deal with the consequences...

FIRST CHAPTER: "Life Of The Party" (COMPLETE! 4,979 words!)

CHAPTER TWO COMPLETE!: 5,552 words!

CHAPTER THREE COMPLETE!: 7,178 words!

CHAPTER FOUR COMPLETE!: 18,403 words! (Working on Chapter Five)

I decided I won't publish the first chapter until all chapters are complete as to avoid pressure and/or rushing things. I will publish one chapter each week after the story is complete.

FAVORITE MCU LINES (List in Progress):

"I'm gonna bust his bunker with the Ex-Wife" - James Rhodes, Iron Man 2

"TONY STARK WAS ABLE TO BUILD THIS IN A CAVE! WITH A BOX OF SCRAPS!" - Obadiah Stane, Iron Man

"I've seen the future, Mr. Coulson, and it's a catastrophe"- Dr. Franklin Hall, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Ep. 3: The Asset

"That's my bargain, you mewling quim!" - Loki, The Avengers

"What was I thinking? You're usually so discreet" - Jarvis, Iron Man

"I thought you were smaller" - Bucky Barnes, Captain America: The First Avenger

"I NEED A HORSE!" - Thor, Thor

"Welcome to Level 7" - Phil Coulson, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Ep. 1: Pilot

"I accept your surrender" - Thor, Thor: The Dark World

"Your birthright was to DIE! As a child. Cast out on a frozen rock" - Odin, Thor: The Dark World

"That was so violent!" - Pepper Potts, Iron Man 3

"She used her britishness against us!" - Grant Ward, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Ep. 9: Repairs

"There are certains aspects of my personality that I cannot control, and when I lose control, it's very dangerous to be around me" - Bruce Banner, The Incredible Hulk (deleted scene)

"You said it yourself, bitch. We're the Guardians of The Galaxy" - Peter Quill, Guardians of The Galaxy