JW.

Never will I leave a story incomplete. Even if months go by, I WILL finish it. Guarunteed.

Likes: Sleep, Starfox, scented candles, pretty notepads, cats, mint chocolate chip ice cream, Powerpuff Girls, ball point pens, sleep, driving cars, windows, the sun, the color red, Sonic the hedgehog, video games, sleep, writing, taking clothes out of shopping bags and putting them in my closet, flowers, socks, The Legend of Zelda, tacos, dolphins, singing my lungs out, ceasar salad, swimming, the library, the smell of permanent marker and new shoes, dragons, music (more than writing, I dare say), sarcasm, water

Dislikes: Coffee shop regulars, alarm clocks, people who think they know and but have NO idea, bugs (very much so), olives, pulp in orange juice, being in a bad mood, other people being in a bad mood, people thinking I'm in a bad mood when they're the ones in a bad mood and I'm totally fine, thick drinking mugs, when people break their twenties to buy a coffee at $1.71, Walmart, when Dad leaves the 'Caps Lock' button on the computer, public bathrooms that don't have radio playing (so awkward, right?????), waking up in the morning, loud people, gossip, more loud people, did I mention loud people?, especially obnoxious people, and people who critique and counsel me or offer their opinions when I don't want it, cat vomit, stomachaches, burnt food, my grandma's cooking, ect ect ect

Books: Pride and Prejudice (Jane Austen), Ella Enchanted (Gail Carson Levine), Artemis Fowl series (Eoin Colfer), Princess of the Midnight Ball (Jessica Day George), The Hunger Games series (Suzanne Collins), Princess Ben (Catherine Gilbert Murdock), Just Listen (Sarah Dessen), Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (Roald Dahl), Money Moon (Jeffery Farnol), A Northern Light (Jennifer Donnelly), The Princess and the Goblin (George MacDonald)

First fandom?: Either Sailor Moon or Powerpuff Girls

Do reviews affect the way you write?: YEAH! I actually UPDATE once in a while. It's extremely motivating too, knowing that your work is known and that people appreciate it. Thanks guys!! :)

Do reviews say how good a story is?: Pft, no!

Fandoms you avoid?: Twilight, anything involoved with the occult, yaoi, zombie apocalypses, M-rated stuff

Warnings you avoid?: Don't we all avoid these?: "Summary sucks!" "Read and review!" "Please go easy on me." "anythin writn lyk dis. i dnt even kno how dey do it."

Talk about yourself: I write better than I speak, and when I do speak it usually feels like no one is listening. I spend most of my precious time writing, singing, cleaning, making bracelets and playing video games. I listen to all sorts of music, from k-pop to opera to screamo to Mozart to African chants. I've only been asked for my number once in my life, and that was at three in the morning. I'm pretty shy, but I can be rather bold when I don't think and just do. I go to parties to meet new people but always end up sticking with those that I know. I have never gotten drunk, and never do I plan to. The idea of becoming intoxicated and being at the mercy of strangers around you freaks me out. I may be Canadian, but I really don't care about hockey, and I have never seen a moose. There's nothing like driving with the windows down in a tunnel listening to Coldplay. I love anime, mangas, Korean dramas and Disney movies. I'm also obsessed with Pinterest and go to bed as late as I can so that I can sleep in the morning (though my parents never let me). And, finally, I have ADD, so that's why I don't update my stories too often :p

Brilliance

Experience comes only after you need it.

The pen is mightier than the sword.

"The man that hath no music in himself/Nor is mov'd with concord of sweet sounds/Is fit for treason, stratagems, and spoils" - William Shakespeare

Have you ever been hurt and the place tries to heal a bit, and you just pull the scab off it over and over again? - Rosa Parks

We could learn a lot from crayons: Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull. Some have weird names and all have different colors, but they all have to live in the same box.

Since it's the early bird who catches the worm, sleep in late. And remember: it's the second mouse that gets the cheese.

Some people drink from the fountain of knowledge; others just gurgle.

Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

"I wake up and piss excellence." - I Am the Champion (B.o.B.)

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. - Theodor Seuss Geisel (Dr. Seuss)

Give us serenity to accept what can't be changed, courage to change what should be changed, and wisdom to know the one from the other. - Found in book A Northern Light by Jennifer Donnelly

Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety-one?

If 4 of 5 people SUFFER diarrhea, does that mean 1 of 5 ENJOY it.

If a pig loses its voice, does that make it disgruntled?

Why is a person who plays piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car isn't called a racist?

If it's true that we are there to help others, then what exactly are others here for?

If a cow laughed, would milk come out of its nose?

A New Brunswick couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 25 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So; the husband left New Brunswick and flew to Florida on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day.

The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an email to his wife. However; he accidentally left out one letter in her email address, and without realizing his error, sent the email.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Houston , a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral. He was a minister who was called home to glory following a heart attack. The widow decided to check her email, expecting messages from relatives and friends.

After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted.

The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:

To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I've Arrived

I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones. I've just arrived and have been checked in.

I've seen that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then!!!! Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.

P. S. Sure is freaking hot down here!!!!

WHY WOMEN SHOULDN'T TAKE MEN SHOPPING

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Target. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Target.

"Dear Mrs. Samuel,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Samuel, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

And last, but not least:

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!' One of the clerks passed out."

According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the school bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.

Every night the maintenance man would remove them, and the next day the girls would put them back.

Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night (you can just imagine the yawns from the little princesses).

To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required.

He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.

There are teachers...and then there are educators.

With a couple celebrating their 50th anniversary at the church's marriage marathon, the minister asked Brother Ralph to take a few minutes and share some insight into how he managed to live with the same woman all these years.

The husband replied to the audience, "Well, I treated her with respect, spent money on her, but mostly I took her traveling on special occasions."

The minister inquired, "Trips to where?"

"Well, for our 25th anniversary, I took her to Beijing, China."

The minister then said, "What a terrific example you are to all husbands, Ralph. Please tell the audience what you're going to do for your wife on your 50th anniversary?"

"I'm going back to get her."

Did I like nut another to it send, do to better anything have doesn't that person a like this reading time sweet your took you since.
(Now read it backwards!)

An old Italian lived alone in New Jersey. He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, as the ground was hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:

Dear Vincent,
I am feeling pretty sad, because it looks like I won't be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.
Love, Papa

A few days later he received a letter from his son.

Dear Pop,
Don't dig up that garden. That's where the bodies are buried.
Love, Vinnie

At 4 a..m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left. That same day the old man received another letter from his son..

Dear Pop,
Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That's the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love you,
Vinnie

The Story of a Man's Triumphant Adventure:

A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, "My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?"

The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, and even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk."

The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way. Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery.

The monks again accept him, feed him, and even fix his car..

That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier.

The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk."

The man says, "All right, all right. I'm dying to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was, is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?"

The monks reply, "You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk."

The man sets about his task. Some forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, "I have travelled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284, 232 blades of grass and 231,281,219, 999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth."

The monks reply, "Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound."

The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, the sound is right behind that door.

The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, "Real funny. May I have the key?"

The monks give him the key, and he opens the door.

Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man demands the key to the stone door.

The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald,...silver, topaz, and amethyst.

Finally, the monks say, "This is the key to the last door."

The man is relieved no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound.

. . . . But I can't tell you what it is because you're not a monk.