YoyYoy
 Author has written 5 stories for Mars, Lord of the Rings, Naruto, and Sims. (Peeks out from behind corner) Why hello darlings, I see you've bothered to take a little look at me. But that's just what you came for, isn't it? You don't want to hear a lot of shit about my hair color and the bands I like. If you're wondering, my fanfics aren't that good, and I have a few original stories that I replaced the characters with. XD No, I do not acknowledge writing any Ranma fanfics. Sorry, but that must be some OTHER YoyYoy, who doesn't write well. So check out my stories, bitches! XD Now, I know no one cares about who the hell I am, so I decided to gather some quotes that define me: "Never argue with an idiot, for they will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience." "I'm not clumsy, the floor just hates me." "Cake or death?" -Eddie Izzard, my British hero. Nikki is my British heroin. Monty Python is my British heroine. "Love like you've never been hurt, work like you don't need the money, and dance like no one is watching." "Be yourself, cause everyone else is taken." "You're unique and special, just like everyone else." "Stand up for what is right, even if you're standing alone." My mom: If Nikki jumped off a bridge, would you? Me: Hell yea! My Mom: Why? Me: Because if Nikki jumped off, I'd know there was a large monster behind us she provoked. "People who think they know everything are irritating to those of us who do." "The good news is, you're not paranoid. The bad news is, well, you're not paranoid." "It's a conspiracy, Mom. Don't take it personally." -Nikki when her mom was freaking out. XD "Adorable children are considered to be the general property of the human race. Rude children belong to their mothers." "Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math." "When you go into court, you are putting your fate into the hands of people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty." "There are 10 kinds of people in this world: people who understand binary code and those who don't." "Never fear, Apathetic Girl is here." -Apathetic Girl... obviously... "Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show the people who have the most live the longest." "GIVE PEACE A FUCKIN' CHANCE FOR FUCK'S SAKE, SCUM BAG!"-Myra (My cuz) "I'm so normal you could stick a fork in me and call me a flan!" -My dumb older brother. "No, that wasn't so bad. I think the worst time changing a tire was when we were parked really near the road that time. Oh, and the cars were going like, 60 MPH. You remember that old jack we used to have? Yeah, it sometimes failed..." -My uncle setting up for an anecdote. Well, if you've read this far, I shall begin to do everything in my power to stop you. Here come some retarded pick up lines and jokes: 'There is a woman and she's walking down the street. She comes upon a magic genie bottle, and opens it. A genie popped out. "I'll give you one wish," he said. The woman rolled her eyes at the cheesiness, but answered anyway. "I want peace in the Middle East," she said. The Genie spluttered angrily. "What? Those guys have been fighting for years, centuries! Even before I was in the bottle! No way! It's impossible! Wish for something else." "Fine," the woman sighed. "I want the perfect man, who'll love me, do the dishes and take out the trash, not think I'm fat, not cheat on me, and love me all the time." The genie sighed. "Give me the damn map."' '"I'm a fermata- hold me!"' That's a musicians pickup line! =D 'There's a cowboy standing in a bar. A woman comes up to him. "Are you a real cowboy?" she asked. The cowboy nodded. "I sure am, ma'am. I get up in the morning and heard the cows, I eat lunch and then rattle up some hogs, and then after dinner I heard the cows." "I see," replied the woman. "Well, I'm a lesbian. I get up in the morning, think about women, eat lunch, think about women, eat dinner, and think about women." Soon, after a conversation, the woman left. A couple comes up to the cowbody. "Are you a real cowboy?" they asked. The cowboy shook his head. "I thought I was, but I just found out I was a lesbian."' 'Theres three guys in training to be police officers. The chief calls the first one into his office for the final test. He holds up a picture. "What are some distinguishing features of this man?" he asked. "That's easy," the guy replied. "He only has one eye." "You bafoon! This is a profile! Next!" The first guy left and the second guy came in. "What are some distinguishing features of this man?" he asked again. "Simple! He only has one ear!" "You idiot!" cried the chief. "This is a profile! Next!" The second guy left and the third guy came in. "What are some distinguishing features of this man?" the chief asked. "He wears contact lenses," the man said. The chief, surprised, looked up the criminal in question and found he did wear contacts. "How did you know?" asked the chief. "Easy," the man replied. "He only has one eye and one ear, so he can't wear normal glasses."' If you're still reading, here's a quote for you: 'If you're not having enough fun, just lower your expectations.' 'If my life were a book, the editor would be saying right about now: 'It's good so far, but where is it all going?' 1. At Lunch Time , Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down. 2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice. 3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that. 4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it " In". 5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso. 6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks , Write "For Smuggling Diamonds". 7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy". 8. Don't use any punctuation. 9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk. 10. Order a Diet Water when ever you go out to eat, with a serious face. 11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go". 12. Sing Along At The Opera. 13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme? 14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day. 15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood. 16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom. 17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!" 18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!" 19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go." IN WALMART: 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, 9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are. 11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" 14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. 15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" 16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!" Repost this if you laughed... I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic. I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot. I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED (Am I really a person? Who decided to put this here? Honestly, does ANYONE expect to be going through this and be like "Nope, oh, yeah, that's TOTALLY me... person? Nah, doesn't sound like me." XD) I didn't lose my job, though my boss was pissed. I claimed it was sexual harrassment. 1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex. Adolf Hitler. 2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, and green, yellow? Red, black, blue, green, and yellow. 3. Your first initial? C. 4. Your month of birth? November. 5. Which color do you like more, black or white? Black. 6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours. Anne Coulter. 7. Your favorite number? 16, 379. 8. Do you like California or Florida more? CALI BABY! 9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more? OCEAN! 10. Write down a wish (a realistic one). Realistic- practical: seeking what is achievable or possible, based on known facts. Well then, it is a FACT that an end to world hunger can be BOUGHT. I wish for world hunger to end. Wait- realistic? Because the magical force that grants my wish at the end of this thing recognizes only reasonable wishes? What the crap? Are you done? If so, scroll down (Don’t cheat--) THE ANSWERS 1. You are completely in love with this person. I'd rather die. 2. If you choose: Red: You are alert and your life is full of love. Black: You are conservative and aggressive. Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back. Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you Love. Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are Down. I sound confused. 3. If you’re initial is: A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life. People who share my initial in this category: Anne Coulter Adolf Hitler Herman Goring Brent Phelps (Husband of Shirley Phelps) Bernie Madoff Joseph Stalin L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to blossom. People who have this initial: Richard "Dick" Cheney S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good. People who have this initial: Shirley Phelps-Roper Vladimir Putin Hey, no matter what your name is, or how cursed you'll be when you don't pass this on, your love life looks good. 4. If you were born in: Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you Fall in love with someone totally unexpected. Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but The memories will last forever. July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life Changing experience for the good. Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your Soul mate. Duuuude, I've got a BOYFRIEND. Don't SAY things like that. Sheesh, do they expect lonely, desperate, single girls are the only ones reading this? 5. If you choose... Black: Your life will take on a different direction; it will seem hard at the time If there was a direction I hadn't taken, I'd be going backwards. But will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change. White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do Anything for you, but you may not realize it. 6. This person is your best friend. Holy living fuck. 7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime. Lucky me. 8. If you choose... 9. If you choose... 10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday! AAAH, must RE-POST for STARVING KIDS IN AFRICA!! |
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