rozulthorn
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Joined 09-11-06, id: 1132267, Profile Updated: 06-04-08
Author has written 7 stories for Greek Mythology, Naruto, Harry Potter, Good Omens, and Discworld.

I love books, but particularly anything by Neil Gaiman and/or Terry Pratchett and fantasy stuff in general.

Dr. Who is the best. Seriously.

I am a student in the middle of England, and I love writing, but I really need to post more of it online (smacks hand! upload, damn you!). Mostly, I've got it on paper or file somewhere and need to post the gits.

Turquoise lemons are my friends! I love my turquoise lemons of doom. They will come to get you if you do not read my stories (particularly "What Really Happened").

Ok, kidding. But please read it. I promise I won't set any insane citrus fruit on you. They are reserved for those who don't like Snape, or anyone I feel like poking. Actually, read Sevenfold Revenge... it's a better story. And I might finish that one in the forseeable future.

My Favourites

Killer Fruit: Turquoise Lemons.

Books: There's a lot, but my all time favourites- The Vampire Chronicles, Harry Potter, The Amulet of Samarkand, Good Omens, American Gods and pretty much the whole Discworld Series.

TV Shows: Dr. Who, Torchwood, House, QI and Star Trek on those rare occasions it's on anymore. Oh yeah, and Jeeves and Wooster. Go Hugh Laurie and Stephen Fry! And Red Dwarf.

Films: Van Helsing, Constantine, Mulan (just for the song "Be A Man" it's so funny...), Phantom of the Opera, LOTR Return of the King (the bit where they light the beacons, and the battle at Minas Tirith, when all the Riders of Rohan come over the hill) and Shrek 2 (awwww! Puss in Boots!! sooooo cute!)

Foods: Raspberries, Lemons, Strawberries, Chocolate, Bread and Potatoes... and Marmite & Cheese Sandwiches.

Quotes: "He's not the messiah he's a very naughty boy!" - Life of Brian
"Dracula: Remember Igor do unto others... Igor: Before they do unto me... master..." - Van Helsing
"Thith beer tathteth like horth pith..." Igor in 'Monstrous Regiment' by Terry Pratchett, who later goes on to say, of the same beer- "I never said I didn't like it!"

Characters: Snape (obviously), Captain Jack, Sherlock Holmes, Kakashi, Jin, Bartimaeus, Aziraphale (who is wildly underrated and seemingly held in second place to Crowley, poor dear) and Lestat.

Daft Things: The turquoise lemons, Loonyland (of which I am the Queen... in French... long story... don't ask), my fishy earrings, mismatched socks, singing along to Phantom of the Opera, speaking in Latin, correcting people's grammar when they really don't want to be corrected and my mad religion- The Church of the Holy Cabbage. If you want to join this wondrous religion, send me a message. It is a great religion. Please join. I will make a list, if anyone does.

And they did:

blondesavemorefun

The rules are: 1) Don't eat the Cabbage, it's too holy. 2) Don't eat Sprouts, they're too evil (Barry the Sprout Lord is the devil, you see) 3) Eat chocolate, it pleases the great Cabbage when you do so.

Miracles performed so far- 2. We made it snow... twice. We may do it again someday... if we feel like it...

My Hates

Orange clothing- it clashes with my hair.
Sunshine- IT BURNS!!
Brussel Sprouts, the spawn of Satan.
People saying nasty things about Titian/Ginger/Auburn hair. And it isn't RED!
Moths. They are evil. That is all.

Other Things

I have dreadful taste in hats.

Why are you still reading this? Read my stories instead, they are more interesting. Seriously, they are. Well... maybe.

I, RozulThorn, do solemnly swear to review all the fics I read, regardless of the number of reviews, its age, or anything else.

I have joined the review revolution.

(to join post the review revolution thingy in your browser and...umm...review the fics you read. Also check out the Reviews Lounge and forum, which can be found on the page of Lexie-H)

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Existential Crises by Igorina reviews
When Pollution starts to question his role in the universe the consequences for Heaven, Hell, Earth and the Horsepersons prove to be completely unprecedented. Contains Crowley x Pollution, Famine x Pollution and Aziraphale x Rare First Editions.
Good Omens - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 24 - Words: 105,382 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 11/29/2011 - Published: 4/13/2007 - Pollution, A. Crowley
Bronze, Sliver, Gold, Steele by PompatusPaul reviews
Crowley phones an old friend to ask a favor. Aziraphale becomes slightly miffed. Remington Steele is being cool. Giles from Buffy also in attendance. Finally complete!
Good Omens - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 12,494 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 6/4/2008 - Published: 10/24/2005 - Complete
An Unexpected Guest by Igorina reviews
Five years after the fall of Voldemort Draco Malfoy seeks Harry Potter's help in evading the wrath of the demon Crowley. A Good Omens crossover featuring HarryxDraco.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,358 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Published: 5/29/2008 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Fascinating Little Restaurants Where They Know You by htebazytook reviews
Crowley is bored. Aziraphale endures it. Not as dirty as it sounds, just quietly slashy.
Good Omens - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,975 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 12 - Published: 2/10/2008
Ordinary Miracles by Nenena reviews
It's tough being an apprentice angel, especially when your teacher doesn't understand you, a demon keeps showing up to harass you, and you're not naturally talented with thirteendimensional calculus. Repost of a fanfic originally written in 2003.
Good Omens - Rated: T - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 18 - Words: 100,982 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 11/4/2007 - Published: 8/22/2007 - Complete
Smokin' by LadyAJ reviews
New laws make lawbreaking easier...
Good Omens - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 599 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Published: 7/31/2007 - Complete
Halloween by LadyAJ reviews
It's Halloween night, and Aziraphale and Crowley are heading out and about. Mild CA slash, rating only to be cautious.
Good Omens - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,697 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 5 - Published: 7/28/2007 - Complete
Standing Still by Cheri-sama reviews
Irritatingly comfortable with their current relationship, they're not going anywhere, just merely standing still.
Good Omens - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 838 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/27/2007 - Complete
Choices by Prieda Solo reviews
On Crowleys falling. noslash. Slightly dark. This is the 666th fic to be written for Good Omens on fanfiction . net
Good Omens - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 470 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/24/2007 - Complete
Kept Not Their First Estate by Musegaarid reviews
Crowley's life leading up to and immediately following his Fall. Or, an angel learns his place the hard way. No slash. Some angst and violence.
Good Omens - Rated: K+ - English - Spiritual/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,090 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/12/2007 - Complete
Three Worlds by Silverfox1 reviews
Written for the Crowley's Fall challenge on Lower Tadfield. There's a war going on in Heaven and God decides to have a chat with the only angel not fighting?
Good Omens - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,556 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 6 - Published: 5/6/2007 - Complete
Divine Intervention of the Diabolic Kind by Igorina reviews
Having been emotionally blackmailed into helping Aziraphale fill his saving quota, Crowley discovers that trying to steer Harry Potter from the path of vengeance is rather more difficult than one might imagine. HP crossover containing HarryxDraco and CxA.
Good Omens - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,716 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/23/2007 - Complete
crazy randomonia insures by Demon Dean reviews
well.....maladict, otto, the watch, and us....things get....crazy...with coffee and hippos and chicken and spandex....what else could possibly go wrong....no parings, or grossness, mushy stuff, like swamp...thats very mushy..
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,125 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/20/2007
Talk Show with Bartimaeus by Cheesey Goodness reviews
What happens when Nathaniel summons Bartimaeus incorrectly? He gets an invitation to be on a live talk show, of course! WARNING: CONTAINS EXTREME RANDOMNESS.
Bartimaeus Trilogy - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 9,881 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 12/28/2006 - Published: 9/10/2006 - Complete
I Love you by ho.wide.world reviews
As Naruto ages from a child to a man, Iruka realizes the love the boy holds for him was much deeper than familial love.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,951 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 104 - Follows: 18 - Published: 10/21/2006 - Naruto U., Iruka U. - Complete
Till the Last Rose by Meijer Brand reviews
It's Naruto's birthday and Iruka is determined to confess his feelings, but what happens when Naruto does the thing he does best? Suprise. NarutoIruka side KakashiSasuke
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,240 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/8/2006 - Iruka U., Naruto U. - Complete
Legacy of the Abhorsen by Carline reviews
Lirael, Ellimere and Sam go to Hogwarts, not suspecting that their presence will set off an unexpected chain of events.
Old Kingdom/Abhorsen series - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Supernatural - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,030 - Reviews: 82 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 8/8/2006 - Published: 10/8/2005
Dr Darryl Birkett: Counsellor to the Immortal by Igorina reviews
Even the best of relationships can sometimes do with a helping hand. As one hapless therapist finds out to his cost. Contains CrowleyxAziraphale, HasturxLigur, FaminexPollution, ShadwellxMadam Tracy and BrianxWensleydale.
Good Omens - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,142 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 14 - Published: 7/14/2006 - Complete
Don't Bet the Farm by Snitwick reviews
After Naruto and Sasuke find out that Kakashi and Iruka are going out, they make a bet about their relationship. In order to find out the answer and determine the winner, Naruto confronts Iruka directly. KakaIruKaka. Complete.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 870 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 3 - Published: 5/1/2006 - Iruka U., Naruto U. - Complete
What They Think by Hinoto Nobukaze reviews
ONE SHOT. What do Naruto characters think of the fanfiction we write about them? Well, here's a chance to find out what they think! R&R!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,303 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 7 - Published: 1/5/2006 - Kakashi H. - Complete
Old Friends by Igorina reviews
Aziraphale meets an old companion in the most unexpected of places. Crossover with Lord of the Rings.
Good Omens - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,228 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/29/2005 - Complete
The Interdimensional Book Club by Igorina reviews
The fic nobody's been waiting for. A bizarre GOHPDiscworld crossover in which Aziraphale, The Librarian, and Hermione Granger have formed the multiverse's first transdimensional book society.
Good Omens - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,889 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 6/20/2005 - Published: 9/29/2004 - Complete
A Series of Implausible Coincidences by Igorina reviews
I was challenged to write a Harry Potter Good Omens crossover involving HarryxDraco, RemusxSirius, CrowleyxAziraphale, teenaged angst and red plastic roses. This was the inevitable result.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,785 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/28/2005 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Hastur's Bargain by Igorina reviews
A depressed, and down on his luck Duke of Hell suddenly finds himself accidentally invoked by a group of very disconcerting individuals.
Good Omens - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,377 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 4/16/2005 - Published: 1/21/2005 - Complete
The Great Feegle Infestation by Igorina reviews
When Aziraphale's bookshop is invaded by an intrepid band of Nac Mac Feegles, he is left with but a single option one that is sure to drive Crowley mad. Contains some A&C slash.
Good Omens - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,857 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 13 - Published: 12/21/2004 - Complete
Legolas's Magical Breeches by edgy wedgy reviews
Sequel to Legolas's Magical Shoe. Legolas loses his pants and falls in love with many, many things. Stress on the word THINGS. Thranduil is not pleased.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 3,873 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 9/5/2004 - Published: 5/31/2003 - Legolas, Treebeard
The Muses of Slash by Lady Alyssa reviews
Not really mythology, per se, more of a modern updating for the nine muses.
Greek Mythology - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 895 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 8 - Published: 2/16/2002
They once said by Isabella Fairfield reviews
Just a little snippit I wrote in class. about a boy and a often forgotten god. has inferred m/m (slash) but only infered. also may turn into something larger, eventually
Greek Mythology - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 436 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Published: 2/10/2002
The Last Hero by thistlemeg reviews
Prometheus is visiting his Olympian relatives and he decides to teach them an important lesson by convincing them to meddle in a young mortal's life. (aka I get annoyed with the ending to The Odyssey and decide to bash the gods about a bit.)
Greek Mythology - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,472 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/25/2002
Anyone but you by Tomo Trillions reviews
[Crowley/Aziraphale slash] The consummation of innocent love does not always go as planned.
Good Omens - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,346 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/6/2001
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Lives of Empirical Crescent reviews
The awful theme-tune, the stories set in only one street... my god! It's a soap! But since it's about a street designed by Bloody Stupid Johnson, perhaps not quite the soap we'd expect.
Discworld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 756 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 4/6/2008
Sevenfold Revenge reviews
Aziraphale and Crowley discover that the horsemen aren't the only anthropomorphic personifications hanging around. No slash, implied or otherwise, unless you twist meanings, maybe.
Good Omens - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,968 - Reviews: 5 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 8/4/2007 - Published: 8/2/2007
The Fandom Experience reviews
Crowley and Aziraphale stumble across some of their fanfiction on the internet.
Good Omens - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 781 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/3/2007
What Really Happened reviews
SPOILER! If you haven't read book seven chapter 32 yet, do not read this.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,810 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 7/29/2007 - Published: 7/23/2007 - Severus S.
Konoha Rhapsody reviews
Naruto does a little bit of kareoke. Just me messing around with Queen song, and with silly comments.
Naruto - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 637 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 6/9/2007 - Complete
Don't Want To Be A Konoha Ninja reviews
Orochimaru singing Green Day. I know, random.
Naruto - Rated: K - English - Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 269 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Published: 6/7/2007 - Orochimaru - Complete
The Second Pandora reviews
As if getting saved by a Greek god wasn't enough, Pandora has to deal with another who has a crush on her. And then there's her father...
Greek Mythology - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 19,239 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/29/2007