Kiska Eluned King

Maniacal, insane, future ruler of the world.

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing, and if I forget to put it in the story, you know it now.

A note regarding Prom Dates: The reason that I don't update very often is basically that I'm a university student who commutes to my hometown nearly every weekend because it's the only way that I get to see my boyfriend. However, I want to take this time to inform you that even if it takes me another 3 years, I will finish this story. I would love to be able to dedicate 6 months to just writing this story, but I can't. I have shared a lot of myself in this story, and giving up on it would be giving up on a part of myself. And even when I'm not writing for this story, I'm thinking about it. I'm telling you this because I want you to know that if you really do like this story, to stick with it. I will get it done. However, I understand if you cannot stand the long wait between updates. If this is the case, simply wait for the status to become complete. If you don't feel waiting for it to become complete is enough, PM me with the subject "Prom Dates Update" and I will message you somewhere down the line, when I do finish this beast.

Name: Jessica

Nicknames: Ebenezer, Jed, Jeked, Kiska, Kek, and generic nicknames for "Jessica"

Age: -unknown- (basically, I never remember to update it...)

Sign: Aries/Monkey

Gender: I am feminine, but have many masculine qualities, which technically makes me somewhat androgynous.

Favorite Shows: Life with Derek, Scrubs, Bones, Black Butler, Supernatural, Buffy: The Vampire Slayer, Firefly, Dollhouse, Once Upon a Time, Revenge, In Plain Sight, Seth MacFarlane (more recently, at least), The Simpsons, Tin Man, Alice (SyFy's Miniseries)

Favorite Movies: Pirates of the Carribean 1,2&3, Labyrinth, Harry Potter 1-3 and 7 parts 1&2, Underworld series (except Awakening, because COME ON), Lord of the Rings, Batman (Tim Burtons and Begins/Dark Knight), Spiderman 1&2 (3 bombed), Star Wars, The Covenant, John Tucker Must Die

Favorite Books: Umm, way to many to put here, but some of them are Harry Potter1-7, 5 being my favorite of the series, Wicked Series by Nancy Holder & Debbie Viguie, Wicked by Gregory Maguire, Meg Cabot, Maggie Steifvater, Bartimaeus trilogy, Cornelia Funke, Keri Arthur, Cinda Williams Chima and all the books Tamora Pierce has published.

Favorite lines and Lyrics:

"Call me Ish," Ishmael said.

"Call me Kit Snicket," Olaf said. (THE END, Lemony Snicket (AKA Daniel Handler))

All day long, everyone in the world is succumbing to peer pressure, whether it is the presure of their fourth grade peers to to play dodgeball during recess, or the pressure of their fellow circus performers to balance rubber balls on their noses, and if you try to avoid every instance of peer pressure you will end up without any peers whatsoever, and the trick is to succumb to enough peer presure that you do not drive your peers away, but not so much that you end up in a situation in which you are dead or otherwise uncomfortable. (THE END, Lemony Snicket)

Rosto cupped Laddybuck in one hand, grabbed me by the back of the neck, and kissed me on the mouth.I should have punched him, but his mouth was sweet and soft. I will punch him next time. (Terrier, Tamora Pierce)

DEREK! Go to your room! (George, (LWD))

Ok, but only if she comes with me. -grabs Casey- (Derek) (BTW: The episode is The Poxfather)

Marge, we can't tell the truth now. If we do, you won't be married to a man. You'll be married to some kind of gay jellyfish cruising the Florida Keys for rich snorklers! (Homer, The Simpsons)

Why'd he do that? Because he's a lummox. Well, we're going to have a beautiful garden party and we're not going to invite you. (Jack, At World's End)

Did you just see three monkeys drive by on a motorcylce? (Sarah, Jumanji)

Yeah... (Judy)

Good girl (Sarah)

Everyday, with every wordless word, we get more far away. The distance between us makes it so hard to stay. Nothing lasts forever, but be honest, babe, it hurts but it may be the only way. (Maroon 5, "Nothing Lasts Forever")

Son are you stoned? (Chase's Dad, Drive me Crazy)

Dad, until you see a black light and a felt Led Zepplin poster, rest easy. (Chase, Drive me Crazy)

Look, I may not have finished school, but that frickin says SAW NAWTA AW NAH! (Jeff Dunhum/Peanut)

They pronounce it: Santa Ana! (Jeff Dunham)

Well, they're wrong! (Peanut)

I don't have any crack! (Jeff Dunham)

-gasp- He SOLD it all! (Jeff Dunham/Peanut)

Bridget, dear, wipe your shoes, take off the boy and come inside. (Paul Ritter, 8 Simple Rules)

Every pane of glass that your pebbles tap negates the things I went through to avoid you. (Fall Out Boy, "Chicago is So Two Years Ago")

You want apologies, girl you might hold your breath, until your breathing stops forever, forever. The only thing you'll get is this curse on your lips. I hope it tastes of me forever, forever. (Fall Out Boy, "Chicago is So Two Years Ago"

... But words are poor handmaidens. Words can never fully say what we want them to say, for they fumble, stammer, and break the best porcelain. The best one can hope for is to find along the way someone to share the path, content to walk in silence, for the heart communes best when it does not try to speak. (Margaret Weis or Tracy Hickman, Dragons of a Lost Star)

He's also responsible for beating the writer with a club until the words came out right -- a matter of several years' nonstop exertion. (Diane Duane, So You Want to Be a Wizard (Acknowledgement))

We've been to your house six times in the last month! (Firefighter, The Simpsons)

Actually, one of those times, I accidentally dialed 911, so I lit the house on fire, so you wouldn't know. It feels good to tell the truth. No, I'm lying again. I feel terrible. (Homer)

This is just awesome:

I like to assume that since I drive a car and maintain a respectable credit rating and rarely murder anyone and bury them in the back garden unless they really deserve it, that the fact that I hear voices won't unduly disturb anyone.

--Robin McKinley