I think my last bit of action last chapter was a little confusing, so I tried to clarify a bit. Thanks for pointing that out to me! :)

Sixtieth Installment: Epilogue: The Never Ending Journey

Summers in Asgard could be unbearably warm. Thor had never really noticed it growing up, so it was for the first time it actually concerned him. He hurried through his large bedroom chambers, headed for the balcony. The doors had been flung wide, allowing in a breeze that felt slightly cooler than the dead air. Standing leaning against the railing, his wife looked like a goddess. The wind stirred the gossamer-light folds of her gown, clinging to her curves and the gentle swell of her pregnant belly. She had only recently begun to show.

Jane turned when his booted feet scuffed the floor, and she smiled, standing on tiptoe to accept his kiss. "You were gone for a while," she commented.

"Too long a while," he agreed, even though it had been only two days. Even two hours felt too long, these days.

She curled her arms around his waist and rested her head against his chest. "What did Hel say?"

Sighing, Thor squeezed her as tightly as he dared. She had only seemed to become more delicate to him after learning she was carrying his child. A bittersweet announcement that had helped alleviate his grief to a surprising degree, though at times it still felt crushing.

Though their plan had worked, it didn't feel like a victory. He could still see everything so clearly. Jane's portal had taken him and Thanos and that dwarven explosive through the gate out of the Nine. Only an eyeblink before the explosive detonated, Loki pulled Thor back through the still-open gateway, back into the safety of Midgard. Then his brother and the gateway above him had vanished in a blinding wave of gold. Hel had assured him she could no longer sense a single gateway, and the Allfather and Heimdall had confirmed it.

"Lady Hel just said the same thing she's been saying since that day," he told his wife, pressing his nose to her chestnut-brown hair and inhaling her scent. Cinnamon and vanilla. "Loki is dead."

Jane shifted, pulling back so she could peer into his eyes. "But we never did find a body."

Thor kissed her forehead. "The sheer power he was wielding easily could have completely destroyed it," he said. Even the thought of that was painful. It had prevented the royal family from giving Loki a proper burial.

"Wouldn't Hel know for sure?" Jane insisted. She had been the optimistic voice of hope, somehow confident that Loki had managed to survive after all. "I mean, she is the guardian of the underworld. Wouldn't she be able to find his soul?"

"Perhaps," Thor confirmed, "but perhaps not. If Loki had well and truly been consumed by Yggdrasil . . ."

Reaching up, she cupped his face in her hands. They were small and soft and smooth. "It isn't like you to be so gloomy. We don't know he died. You should be holding out hope."

He covered her hands with his and pulled them down to his lips. "If I hold onto hope now and learn later he is truly gone, my heart would break."

Of everyone who had known and loved him, only Jane and Frigga seemed sure Loki was still alive. Thor truly wished he could believe it.

Jane sighed softly and tugged on her hands, bringing him down to her level so she could kiss him again. When she pulled back, her eyes were shining. "Just consider what you know of your brother. He's the smartest man we know, he's he most clever, and definitely the most resourceful. If anyone could survive, he could."

Closing his eyes, Thor embraced her again. "Yes," he whispered. He didn't have her confidence, perhaps, but he certainly had faith in Loki's ability to survive.

If you yet live, my brother, I hope I will one day see you again.

o0o 0o0 o0o

Pepper sighed and saved her file, glancing at the clock. Not quite five. Closing her browser, she got up from her comfortable chair and stretched her back and shoulders.

"Jarvis?" she inquired.

"Yes, Miss Potts."

"Where is he?"

"Still in his lab," the AI voice told her.

Rubbing a hand over her face and deciding she'd had enough work for one day, Pepper headed for the door. She didn't get very far before her phone rang. Glancing at the caller ID, she grimaced and answered.

"Hello, Mr. Haynes. Yes, this is Pepper. Yes, I'm at Stark Tower. No, I don't think he'll want to come to the Board Meeting tomorrow. Well, I'll do my best . . . but I can't promise anything. Yes, I know, and I'll be there as usual. Thank you." Rolling her eyes, she pressed the end call button and headed for the kitchen.

The Tower project had certainly represented a different time in her life. Though she still loved Tony with all her heart, it was a different kind of love now. She had accepted his reasons for wanting to end their romantic entanglements, and she didn't regret it.

She did, however, still worry about Tony. That terrible conflict had ended over four months ago, and even though Tony was functioning and working as of two months ago, he was not the same. He had a cold, hard edge to him he'd previously lacked.

As she started making sandwiches, her cell phone rang again. She recognized the ring tone and started smiling. "Hi."

"Hi," Bruce's voice said. "How is our engineer today?"

Spreading some mayo over the bread, she shrugged with the shoulder not holding the phone to her ear. "No better, really. I'm about to bring him some food. He still doesn't eat unless I bring it to him. I don't think he remembers."

A pause. "Do you think he'll ever be himself again?"

"I hope so," she murmured. "It might do him some good to see a friend other than me. Why don't you come with me tomorrow?"

"Sure," he agreed easily enough. "You going to be home tonight?"

"Yes. I'm just going to make sure he eats, then I'll head home for the day."

"Okay. See you soon. Love you, Pep."

She smiled. "I love you, too."

Hanging up, she went back to making sandwiches. Not everything that had come out of that battle was grief.

o0o

Natasha hopped out of her chair when the phone rang, grabbing it off the kitchen island of the comfortably large apartment she and Steve shared. Clint's name and picture appeared on the screen, and she tapped answer.

"Hey," she said with a smile. "How are you feeling?"

"Not too bad, actually," her best friend replied. "I think I'm finally up to going and seeing Stark. Banner just told me he and Pepper are going tomorrow, want to join?"

"Sure," Natasha replied. She hadn't seen Stark in about three months, their last interaction in his Tower bordering on hostile.

She understood his volatility. He'd taken Loki's death very, very hard. Personally, Natasha wasn't convinced Loki was dead. He was the craftiest son of a bitch she had ever known, making all her skills look like child's play.

"Banner said Pepper told him Stark is doing better," Clint went on.

In the aftermath of that battle, he'd been the only person wounded. He'd almost died, actually. He'd been in a coma for three months, and for the last month he'd been in intensive physical therapy to rebuild the muscle mass he'd lost.

The first words out of his mouth were, "Tell me something good came out of that."

Natasha had been the first to tell him Jane and Thor were married and expecting, and Clint had smiled and said, "Good."

And he didn't believe Loki was dead, either. No one discussed it with Tony.

"He's my lover," Tony had snarled the one time Natasha tried to convince him. "If he were still alive, he would let me know!"

"Why don't Steve and I pick you up at noon? We can have lunch at the Tower."

"Sounds good," Clint said. "Say hi to your guy for me."

She smiled. "Will do."

As she ended the call, strong arms wrapped around her waist. Steve nuzzled her ear. "How is he?"

She leaned into his embrace and turned her head to kiss his lips. "Good. We're picking him up at noon tomorrow and going to the Tower to drag Stark out of his lab. Bruce says Tony is doing better, but he could use some human interaction."

"I agree," he said. "Until then, what do you want for dinner?"

Her lips curled into a wicked little grin. "How about we skip dinner and go straight to dessert?"

o0o 0o0 o0o

At two in the morning, Tony had to stop. He didn't think he'd gotten more than a few hours of sleep in the last four days, working endlessly on his latest project: the mass-production of his clean generator. Stark Industries would be ready for the open market in about one more month.

After that, he had no idea what he would do with himself. Start a new project? Sure. That would do. He had a few things he'd never put any effort into thanks to a lack of time. It would seem he had all the time in the world now.

Thor had quietly told him a few weeks ago that his mother should be able to reverse the anti-aging effect Loki had put on him, but Tony was absurdly reluctant. It felt like throwing away a gift Loki had given him.

Some of the Avengers believed the god was still alive somehow. Hel and Heimdall had assured them Loki was no longer alive because they could not sense his presence. Hel had sworn that between her, the four Caskets, and Heimdall's ability to see all, they would have found him if he were.

Tony hadn't held out hope. His lover was gone.

Maybe in another four months the pain would feel less sharp.

Maybe in another four years he'd start fucking around again.

And in another for decades he would stop feeling so damn heartbroken.

Raking fingers through his greasy, disheveled hair, he staggered up from his chair and headed to his bedroom.

"Sir," Jarvis said, "Miss Potts wanted me to tell you she will be here tomorrow with the rest of the Avengers."

Tony's first reaction was to tell them all to fuck off. After a split second he heaved a sigh and resigned himself. He trudged into the bathroom and took a fast, hot shower. Even though he wanted to collapse into unconsciousness for a year, he made himself shave, tidying up his normal neat, goatee. Despite the cleanness, he still looked far from human.

Turning away, he dropped onto his bed without bothering to put on any clothes. His hand immediately went to his chest, idly rubbing where the arc reactor had once been. His jaw clenched against the well-familiar pain.

He hoped that dwarven explosive had killed Thanos. It had really only ever been to prevent him from immediately reentering the Nine Realms while Loki destroyed all the gates. Hopefully it had annihilated the bastard.

Fuck, I don't want to see them tomorrow. They'll be all nice and supportive and try to assure me Loki is still alive. I don't want to hear it anymore!

Despite how tired he was, it still took him over two hours to finally drop into uneasy sleep. Troubling dreams dogged him, tormented by the sound of Loki's voice calling to him.

"Stark. Stark. Stark . . ."

Tony's eyes flew open in the pitch dark of his room. His heart raced, and he wasn't at all sure what had awakened him. Perspiration covered his body, the sheet over him sticking uncomfortably. His chest heaved as he tried to catch his breath.

"Are you finally awake, Anthony?"

Tony sat bolt upright on the bed, head whipping around in the dark. No. It wasn't possible. Right? There, sitting with his ankle propped on one knee and his verdant eyes glittering in amusement, wearing a dark green shirt and brown leather tunic with gold gilding, was Loki. He didn't quite look solid, as if he was just a ghost.

Conflicting emotions sprang up. This was a dream. A trick. A lie. The universe playing the cruelest fucking joke on him.

"This isn't real."

The apparition smiled. "I'm not physically here, if that's what you mean," he said in Loki's arrogant, perfectly accented voice. "But I am real."

"You're dead," Tony said flatly.

The ghost's smile widened into a grin. "I assure you, I am very much alive."

A peculiar feeling stole through Tony. "Then where the fuck have you been?" he snarled.

The smile disappeared, and Loki seemed to stare off into nothing. "I may have survived, but it was only barely," he said after a pause. "There were many times I thought I would finally succumb to my injuries and die. It was not my intent to hide myself away, Stark. I was simply too weak to return."

For the first time in nearly five months, hope flared. Bright, hot, painful. "So, you're still alive?"

The smile came back. "Yes."

"But everyone said you were dead," Tony had to make sure. "Hel. Heimdall. Your damn father."

"I have been dead twice before," Loki reminded him with a wicked grin. "They could not find me because I have been outside the Nine Realms all this time. When I destroyed the last gateway, I was on the other side of it."

"Then how are you even here?" Tony demanded. This was feeling less and less real.

"Well," Loki said with a slow smile, "I didn't quite destroy the last gate. I left a little piece of it, just in case I did survive. I rather expected not to, but I certainly hoped I would."

Tony's heart started to pound again. "So . . . you're alive? You're coming back?"

"No," Loki said, shaking his head. "There's nothing left for me here. I know Thor married Miss Foster, I have no desire to return to a life I have long left behind. I will be leaving the Nine for good."

The hope flickered and died. "Then why bother coming back and telling me all this?" He hated that he sounded so angry. So hurt.

Loki's lips curled into a mischievous smile. "I had thought to ask if you wanted to come with me."

Blink. It felt like the world tipped on its axis and gravity began to slide away toward the sky. A moment of completely disorienting vertigo. Loki was alive. Alive. For the first time since his lover had died, Tony suddenly came back to life.

A slow smile answered the smirk. "Sure. Why the hell not."

o0o

When the Avengers arrived the next day, it was Natasha who found a little note taped to Stark's fridge. It simply said, Gone to see the universe! with a cheeky little smiley face. She broke into the biggest fucking grin she'd ever felt on her face and started laughing.

"Well. Imagine that."

The end

Watch for the sequel coming soon. ;)