Loki was quiet for a long time – it was the first time Darcy had seen him speechless. His eyes didn't meet Darcy's; they flitted first to her stomach, then roamed the room, looking anywhere but at Darcy's eyes. There was something in his eyes that Darcy had never seen before. She was used to anger or a smirk or a smile or borderline insanity. But now? Now there was upset, there was sadness, there was confusion… and there was fear. It was comforting and concerning at the same time. He bit his lip, and Darcy cursed herself for thinking how sexy it was. It was too quiet.
"Say something!" it came out more impatiently than she intended, and his eyes rested on the space above her left shoulder.
"I don't know what you expect me to say," he said, softly. "Are you looking for an apology?"
"No," she said, swallowing. She'd expected him to flip shit, get angry, yell at her and maybe break something. Or at the very least she expected some kind of sarcastic remark, something snippy and sassy. She wasn't expecting this. He looked genuinely concerned, upset even. "I just… I thought I needed to let you know."
"Can you be sure it's my child?" he asked, and Darcy scoffed, seriously offended.
"You're the only guy for six months. I'm no slut, Loki," she sniped and he pushed his hands through his hair.
"No, no, I wasn't suggesting… I simply meant that… this isn't good," he sounded pathetically desperate when he said it.
"Yeah well, it's not exactly great for me either," she sighed. "Pregnant with the child of a demigod psychopath is not where I saw myself, especially not before I turned thirty."
He looked genuinely offended at that, then swallowed, straightening his back.
"I'm not going to apologise, Darcy," he said.
"I don't want you to," she reminded him.
"I will be there to help work out what we're going to do," he assured her and she was gobsmacked for a second.
"Whoa! What do you mean 'figure out what we're going to do'? There's only one thing we can do," she informed him. "I'm having an abortion, Loki."
"An abortion?" he repeated, and now he looked mad. "You wish to terminate this pregnancy? You wish to end the life of our child before it even begins?"
"I… well, yeah," she swallowed. It was an odd concept – the genocidal maniac was pro-life. "Come on, Loki. We're the last two people alive who should be having a kid together."
"Well, why?" Loki asked. "Do you doubt your abilities as a mother?"
"No I just…" she said.
"So you doubt my abilities as father?" he asked. She didn't reply, and he laughed, a harsh parody of the real thing. "Heavens, girl. I'm a lot of things – I'm the first one to admit it – but a bad father is not one of them."
"Wait. How would you know that if… do you have kids?" she asked, taken aback. He raised one eyebrow.
"Yes, I do, now you come to mention it. Six of them, actually. Well. Five now, I suppose," he informed her.
"No way. You have kids," she whispered.
"Yes," he confirmed. "So I'm not inexperienced as a father. I understand that it's your body and I suppose I can't really force you but just know this – I've already had one of my children taken from me, Darcy, and I'll do everything in my power to assure I don't lose another one."
"You… I… what happened?" it was all she could think to ask. He shook his head.
"I don't wish to discuss it," he said, simply. There was a silence. Darcy broke it, clearing her throat.
"So…" she said.
"So," he repeated.
"Well…" she said.
"Well," he repeated.
"Yep," she said.
"Mm," he mumbled. The air was so thick and heavy with tension that it could've been cut with a knife. Darcy suddenly found herself close to tears.
."How are we going to tell people? Jane's going to kill me," she sighed.
"And Thor me," Loki agreed. "Actually, no. Thor will be delighted, he's always very enthusiastic about these kinds of things. But it doesn't bare thinking about what'll happen when he tells Odin."
"He won't be impressed?" Darcy guessed, shocked. Like, what guy doesn't want to be a grandfather?
"He's not impressed by anything I do," Loki said, raising one eyebrow. "Oh, if it was Thor he'd be delighted, over the moon. But heaven forbid I should do anything. Ever."
"Ah. Gotcha," she said, supressing a giggle, though she couldn't really think why it was funny. Maybe it was just the nerves. Then she sighed, pushing a hand through her hair.
"What are we going to do Loki?" she groaned. He did something then that surprised her. He took one of her hands between both of his and looked her directly in the eye, very serious, very solemn.
"It was a mistake, what we did, and we both know it. But this is what's happening, we're going to have to deal with the consequences of our actions," he told her. "Whatever happens, whatever we decide to do, this is something that's going to be with both of us for the rest of our lives. And whatever happens, this is something that involves both of us. Something we've both done. I know I'm a lot of things Darcy – a liar and murderer amongst them – but never let it be said that I'm dishonourable. We're in this together."
"Thank you," she whispered. "Let's not tell anybody yet. Let's just wait 'til we decide what we're going to do, yeah?"
"Good plan," he agreed, patting her hands. He smiled then. "Gods, girl, don't look so scared. You'll be fine. I promise."
There was quiet, broken by footsteps on the stairs. Loki quickly dropped Darcy's hand as if it was white hot and picked up his newspaper again. Darcy stood, not sure what to do. The kitchen door opened, and Jane entered.
"Uh… hey, guys," she said, picking up on the tension immediately.
"Good morning, Jane," Loki said – perhaps a little too brightly. Normally Jane wouldn't question it; Loki still gave her the creeps, but they'd formed an awkward friendship. He was pleasant enough to her, and she to him. But the air in the room made it strange.
"Morning," Darcy mumbled, eventually. Jane busied herself making a cup of coffee.
"You two okay? You're awful quiet this morning," she commented.
"Mm. This article is interesting," Loki offered in way of an explanation.
"Yeah. I uh… yeah," Darcy said, awkwardly.
"You sure? You don't look okay," Jane said, and she wasn't entirely sure who the question was directed at.
"I've uh… I think I have a stomach flu," Darcy explained. Jane looked enlightened suddenly.
"Oh! Yeah, I thought I heard you being sick earlier," she said, and Darcy paled but nodded.
"I'm helping out," Loki provided. "I know some effective herbal remedies – Mother used to teach them me how to make them on Asgard."
"Oh. Right. Um. Okay," Jane said. "Well. I am… going to go get Thor. So I will see you two later."
Jane made her way upstairs, to find Thor awake and dressing. He cocked his head, noticing her expression.
"What's the matter, darling?" he asked, concerned.
"Darcy and Loki are up to something," was her weary reply.
"Oh," Thor sighed.
"Oh," Jane agreed.