Title: The Shed
Author: crammit
Fandom: Glee
Rating: M
Pairing: Brittany/Santana
Timeline: AU-ish – it's set around senior year for Brittana but doesn't really adhere to canon.
Summary: "Come on, San. This will be fun. You said you weren't scared, right?" "Right." - Rated M for smut and brief bad language

A/N: Glee and its characters do not belong to me. I'm only borrowing them. But I promise to put them right back where I found them.

A/N: This is my humble contribution to Swinging Cloud's "THE BRITTANA FANDOM'S SPOOKTACULAR TOUCH-A-TOUCH ME DIRTY FICTION DOUBLE FEATURE!" fan fiction escapades for Halloween. Also tagged as #DUBSPOOK on Tumblr for easy access. Swinging Cloud, thanks for letting me play with the rest of the authors in the fic sandbox. :-)

Happy Halloween!

"Britt, where are we going? Didn't your parents want us to meet up with them over by the bumper cars?"

"No, San. They were getting my little sister funnel cake," Sliding my fingers between yours, I keep us walking in the direction of the haunted house we saw when we first walked through the entrance of this Fall carnival, the bright red lights announcing "Haunted House of Terrors" casting an eerie glow on the people waiting in line to get in. Pulling you with me as you start to slow down, I lift our hands and show the ticket person our wrist bands, smiling at him even as he turns bored eyes to the people coming up behind us, "How did you hear bumper cars?"

Your fingers twitch in my hand as you realize I've smoothly guided us into the line to get into the walk-through haunted house and I watch with amusement as you look over your shoulder, your eyes flashing to mine when you realize that there is a group of people behind us now, blocking our exit from the attraction. Reaching up with my free hand, I even out the string on your Cheerios hoodie, casually brushing my fingers across your chest, your fingers tightening for a different reason as I lean into you slightly, "Are you scared of this haunted house, San?"

"What? No," Your eyes scan over the people in front of us, falling to a father with a group of young girls, all of them chattering excitedly as he shifts his grip on an oversize stuffed elephant. "How scary can this thing be, anyway? Those girls are like, eight and they don't look like they're about to get their souls eaten by soul-hungry ghosts. Or whatever that stupid sign says up there."

Grinning at you as you shrug your shoulders, I'm not fooled by your attempt to seem nonchalant. I saw your eyes drift over and linger on this attraction when we'd first gotten here, your steps faltering a bit before you leaned against my shoulder, not so subtly directing us towards the midway. Still smiling, I let go of your hand and place my hand against your back, moving you to stand in front of me as the line shuffles forward a few feet. Keeping my hands on your waist, I lean my weight against the wooden railing keeping us all in line, dropping my chin to your shoulder as I tease you, my eyes closing briefly at the pleasant smell of your shampoo mixed with the aroma of fried carnival food, "Are you scared you're going to be attacked by a soul eating ghost, honey? You know those aren't real, right?"

Snorting out a laugh, you place your hands over mine and shift them to the inside front pocket of your sweatshirt, keeping our hands pressed against your stomach as you look over your shoulder at me, "The only thing I'm scared of is that one of those sweaty idiots inside those dollar store costumes are going to try and cop a feel in the dark while we walk around in there."

Moving us forward as the line advances, I jokingly start to raise my hands, imagining the blush on your cheeks even as the red glow around us artificially puts one on your face, "Maybe we should just walk through the haunted house with my hands on your boobs. You know, to protect them."

"Britt…"

The warning squeeze on my fingers stops my progress but I give in to the temptation to kiss the dimpled curve of your smile, both of us turning our heads as excited talk turns into shrieking screams as the group of girls and the father get ushered into the entrance of the haunted house, the fake zombie guide snarling over at the crowd for good measure before following the group inside.

You startle a bit at the evil laugh that plays over the loud speaker that's hanging precariously from the top of the door, the next group in front of us getting ready to make their way into the attraction. You turn to glare at a group of teenage boys behind us in line, their hoots and laughter over the cheesiness of the evil laugh making a few of the other people standing around us start to laugh as well, your whispered 'dumbasses' causing me to kiss your cheek again as I remove my hand from your sweatshirt and grab my cell phone from the back pocket of my jeans.

Turning around to lean your back against the wooden railing, you pull our hands from your pocket and link our pinkies together, looking at my hand as I swipe to unlock the phone, my thumb moving rapidly over the keys, "Who are you texting?"

"I'm texting my mom to let her know where we are. You know, in case we don't make it out aliiiiive," I drop my voice into a horrible parody of a scary voice and am rewarded by your giggle, the sight of your smile causing me to fumble a little bit as I put my phone on vibrate and put it back inside my pocket. Even in the unnatural red glow being cast by the sign outside the haunted house, along with the other dozens of flashing lights hanging from various games and signs around us, I feel my heart race a little bit at how beautiful you are and I can't help but lean forward and place a fleeting kiss against your lips. The fact that you don't immediately glance around to see who might have seen me kiss you prompts me to drop another kiss against your lips, humming a bit at the slick feel of your lip gloss against my mouth.

Smiling as you reach up and adjust the blue beanie resting on my head, your fingers playfully tug on the zipper of my fleece as you bring your hands back to your side, walking backwards slowly as the line starts to move again, your smile dropping as you hear the guy behind you ask how many people are in our group. Realizing we've reached the front of the line, you spin around quickly, my hand coming up to cover a smile as you look at the haunted house with wide eyes, the four people ahead of us jostling and joking with each other as yet another zombie guide waits at the entrance. Reaching forward to hold your hand, I smile widely at the guy at the gate, rubbing my thumb over the back of your hand as I notice you looking at the exit sign a few yards to our left, "Just two."

"Okay, then you can go with the group ahead of you. All set, dude," He looks over at the zombie, dropping the flimsy chain behind us as we join the back of the group.

Ignoring the zombie's cheesy intro about the horrors we are about to see as we walk through this haunted house, I tighten my fingers against your hand, reaching up with my free hand to touch your chin, turning your face towards me and smiling reassuringly, "Come on, San. This will be fun. You said you weren't scared, right?"

"Right."

The tiny quiver in your voice makes me sneak a quick kiss to your cheek before we're ushered through a dark curtain, the sounds of the carnival behind us fading away slightly as we're assaulted with creepy music pouring out of hidden speakers, the couple in front of us jumping as a strobe light kicks off in front of them, laughter immediately following as they tease each other. Keeping my hand holding tight to yours, I feel a rush of excitement as we make our way around the haunted house, my entertainment seeming to be disproportionate to your unease as our senses are bombarded with flashes of lights and disembodied voices along with creepy people in straightjackets walking past us. The people in our group jump in fear, real or exaggerated, every time and I can't help but laugh as you mimic their responses. I keep my eyes on you as we make our way past a fake cemetery, grinning at you as you pull me away from reaching over a cardboard fence to poke at one of the zombies creeping over a tombstone. Continuing to follow our group, we both hurry past what appears to be a nursery in Hell, scary and weird looking dolls strewn around the room as children singing nursery rhymes gets piped in through speakers located in the ceiling. Concurring with your whispered 'what the fuck?' I shake my head and keep us moving, not even sparing a glance back as one of the rocking chairs starts to move on its own.

While I am able to start anticipating when a person dressed up in costume is about to "attack" us, you seem to be relying on sheer terror to guide you through the haunted house. Every time you jump at one of the people lurching out at us, your body knocks into me until I'm forced to just keep my arm around your waist, your hand clutched in mine as we continue to follow the group in front of us. After a particularly harrowing brush with a fake-chainsaw-welding bloody farmer, you turn in my arms and grip the front of my fleece, your face buried against my neck as I walk us a few feet past the fence where the farmer is set up to scare people. Keeping an eye on the people ahead of us, I run my hands across your back, your warm breath against my neck derailing my thoughts from comfort into something decidedly less scary. Pressing a kiss against your temple, I bite my lip at the feel of you returning the favor against the side of my neck, your lips sticking slightly to the skin as you leave behind a faint remnant of your lip gloss. Your jeans slide across my jeans as you shift in my arms, your hand dropping down to find mine as you turn and start to walk down the creaking hallway with purpose, your eyes scanning around until you spot what you are looking for, the people ahead of us hurrying past a darkened shed up ahead on our right. Noticing that no one jumps out at them, I slow down a little bit and decide to tease you, the feel of your lips on my neck still warm against my skin, "Where are you hurrying off to, San? We're only halfway through, I think. You said you were fine to go in and…"

"Okay, okay, I'm scared. Okay?" Pulling me towards one of the red Exit signs a little further down the corridor, you turn around when I yank back on your hand gently, keeping us in place next to the front doorway of a fake shed, a rubber mangled arm hanging from a hook at the top of the doorjamb. Looking back when you realize the group we were with has turned the corner up ahead, leaving us alone in this dark alcove, you pull more insistently on my hand, your eyes growing wider as you realize I'm pulling you deeper into the shadows, "Britt, what are you doing? Let's just go. There's funnel cake outside, and cotton candy, and I promise I'll win you twenty stuffed animals if we duck out of that exit right now. No, wait…stop…you realize that it's freaking pitch black in there, right?"

"You're cute when you're babbling, you know that?"

"I'm even cuter when I'm not about to be killed by monsters."

I can't help but laugh at your petulant tone, letting go of your hand in favor of lightly grabbing the front of your sweatshirt and pulling you into a kiss, walking us slowly towards the shed as I distract you, deepening the kiss with a small moan.

A scream followed by laughter rings out behind us and I realize that our time alone is becoming fleeting. I feel arousal start to warm my skin at the thought of what I'm about to do and I swallow hard as my lower belly clenches in response, wrapping my arms around your waist as I walk us into the shed, breaking the kiss as we step deeper inside the structure. The smell of sawdust, paint and rubber still lingers in the enclosed space and the combination is not entirely unpleasant. The nails that are digging into my side as you hold tight to my waist is unpleasant, however, so I reach down and grab your hands, turning my body so that my back is flush against the wall. Releasing your hands, I slide my fingers around your hips, pulling you to stand between my legs, giggling as you lose your balance and fall against me, your hands pressing into the wall behind me as you try to break my hold, "Brittany! Are you crazy? What are you doing?"

"Protecting you from all the monsters out there."

"By pulling me into the body parts shack of all their victims?"

The sound of approaching voices causes me to bring one hand up and cover your mouth, my other hand sliding up the back of your sweatshirt, my fingertips grazing the warm skin of your back as I pull you tighter against me. I can barely make out the whites of your eyes in this dark space but the panicked look in them makes me drop my hand from your mouth and replace it with my lips, my free hand cupping the back of your head as I lick across the seam of your mouth. I feel your body relax minutely against me as you softly touch the tip of your tongue to mine, my fingertips dipping under your waistband as your moan is covered by the sound of shuffling footsteps and laughter as a group of people makes their way past the shed, a fading shout of 'ewww, arm' lingering in the air for a moment before we're greeted with mostly silence again.

Your hands press against my shoulders and break the kiss, my cheeks pulling up into a smile at the slightly breathless tone of your voice, "You are not doing what I think you're thinking about doing, are you?"

The hiss of a fog machine sounds faintly outside the shed and for a brief moment, I'm able to make out your features as strobe lights kick on a few feet away down the hallway. Smirking at you while you can still see me, I bring both hands to the front of your jeans, one hand holding tight to the button as my other hand makes a slow trip under your sweatshirt to trail across your stomach and up towards your bra, my breath rushing out at the feel of the warm satin against the tips of my fingers, "If you think I'm thinking about fucking you right here inside this haunted house, then you are right."

With perfect timing, the strobe lights stop and we're cast into dark shadows again, your breath catching as I cup your breast, my thumb running over the hard peak I can feel through the fabric. Your voice is hushed as your hand slides from my shoulder to grip my wrist, my smirk growing as I realize you're pressing my hand tighter against you even as you speak words of protest, "We can't do that here, Britt. There's a whole ton of people walking around this spooky ass house and what about the workers who are wandering around scaring everyone? Never mind the fact that there is a severed arm three feet from my head."

"It's not real."

"Sooo not the point..."

"Just think, you won't be scared any longer though, Santana."

"No, I'll just be a felon for like, public lewdness of something. All anyone has to do is just take a closer look in here and they'll see…fuuuck."

Deciding to show you how much fun this might be, I turn my wrist and cup my hand between your legs, huffing out a breath at how warm you feel against my palm. Massaging you through your jeans, I resume my exploration of your chest, your open mouth coming to rest against the edge of my jaw as I slip my hand under your bra, my fingers brushing over your hard nipple before I press my whole palm against your warm flesh. Kneading in time with my hand between your legs, I accept the passionate kiss I knew was coming, turning my head and sliding my tongue against yours, both of us moaning into the kiss. Inhaling, I can smell your body wash and shampoo as you change the angle of the kiss, your dark hair catching lightly against the fabric of my fleece as you start to slowly move your hips against my hand, your legs pulsing forward as the seam of your jeans hits you at just the right spot.

I can feel your heart pounding a hard cadence against my hand and I break the kiss, sliding my damp lips across your cheek to rest against your ear, both of my hands going to the button of your jeans. Slipping the button free, I grip the zipper and hold the small piece of metal still, sliding my free hand across your stomach before pressing firmly against your lower back. The quick shuffling of feet and nervous laughter gets closer to the entrance of the shed and I tighten my hand against your back when I feel you reach up to grab my shoulders, your breath warm as you pant against my neck, "Brittany, we're totally going to get caught."

"Well yeah, sure…if we try and leave now. There are people right outside the shed."

As if on cue, a high pitched scream sounds about three feet from us, followed by more laughing as a group of about five people go flying past the doorway, silence taking their place before the hiss of the fog machine starts up again. Slowly dragging your zipper down, I feel your lower stomach tremble against the backs of my fingers, the satin of your underwear warm against my hand as I whisper to you, "San, you have to help me and pull your pants down a bit."

Your smile brushes against my cheek as your fingers dig into my shoulders, your hips slowly pressing forward as you deny my request, "Nope. You want to defile me in a haunted house, you're going to have to work for it."

The fog machine cuts off and I know that in the next few moments, another group of people will come past this shed so I make the quick decision to reverse our positions, turning us around so your back is against wall of the shed, my body blocking yours as I use both hands to tug your jeans down to the middle of your thighs. Your hands have fallen to your side as you divide your attention between my face and the space over my shoulder, your voice harsh despite the look of desire I can make out in your eyes even through the darkness of the shed, "What are you doing?"

"I figured you didn't want anyone to see your ass if I pulled your jeans down. You can't have a full moon inside, San."

Snorting out a laugh, your hands clench into fists as I step closer to you, one of my hands reaching to grip the back of your neck as the other brushes low on your stomach, playfully snapping the waistband of your underwear. Kissing the side of your mouth, I watch as the smile on your face slowly gives way to an open-mouthed moan as my fingertips start to slide back and forth between your legs, my middle finger pressing harder as my own groan pushes past my throat at the damp feel of the fabric against my hand. Moving my hand, I slip my fingertips underneath your underwear, your knees bending slightly as I pull your cheek to rest against mine, my eyes closing at the first touch of your wetness against my fingertips. I hold my hand still and just brush my fingertip against your center, the warm heat of you making my own arousal pulse inside of me as I coat my finger in your wetness, dragging it slowly back and forth across your clit as I tease you, "For someone who is afraid of becoming a felon, you sure seem to be turned on by the idea."

A screaming blur of people sprint past the shed and drown out your response, my eyes opening as your hands grab onto my waist, your hips starting to jerk forward in an attempt to get me to move faster. Loosening the grip on your neck, I pull the hood of your sweatshirt away from your shoulder, leaning down to lick at your skin, sucking lightly as a rush of wetness greets my action. Pressing my teeth against your skin, I push forward with my hand, teasing your entrance with little flicks of my fingertip as you rest your closed mouth against my temple, your groans sounding deep in your throat as I push just a little bit harder. A burst of music and evil laughter rings out faintly somewhere behind where the shed is set up and I can feel your heart race harder where your breasts are pressed against me, your fingers digging into my waist as you start to curl your hips towards my finger. Sliding my hand over to cup your jaw, I pull back slightly so I can look at you, your lush mouth enticing me to kiss you, my tongue sliding along yours as I push my middle finger inside you and hold it still, my groan drowning out the sound of the fog machine starting again as I feel you clench hard at the intrusion.

Breathing through my nose, I keep the kiss going even as I press closer to you, my legs straddling one of your thighs in a desperate attempt to get some sort of pressure against my own aching arousal. Your hand grips my hair suddenly, dislodging the beanie from my head as you pull me away from the kiss, your breath rushing past my face as your eyes find mine, "This has to be quick."

"It's okay. Nobody can see us in here."

"I don't know how long that luck is going to hold up though. Besides, it's really creepy to have you do this while there's a severed arm looking me in my face."

"Arms don't have eyes."

"Brittany…"

Smirking, I slip my finger from inside you and slide it forward to brush firmly against your clit, the back of your head thudding dully against the wall as your hips rock forward in gratitude. I watch your face as you watch the doorway, my finger slipping against you as you get wetter and wetter. Bringing two wet fingers to rub your clit, I grind my hips slightly against your thigh as the low voices of people trying to sneak past the shed reach our ears. Pressing harder and a bit faster against your clit, I bring my lips to your ear, breathing dirty words and moans against it as I tease your entrance with every thrust forward, getting the reaction I was hoping for when you bring both of your hands grab my forearm, your mouth opening into a loud moan as you start to ride my fingers.

Turning my head, I look over my shoulder as a guy's voice sounds precariously close to the entrance of the shed, "It sounds like someone is moaning in that shed. Do you think there's a zombie in there?"

"Oh my God, Joe, just keep moving. I don't want whatever is in there to grab me. Just go faster."

Watching as a dainty hand grabs a leather jacket covered arm and pulls it quickly past the shed, I turn back to look at you, dragging my mouth across your plump bottom lip as I curl my fingers slightly, "Mmmm, that sounds like a good idea. Do you want me to go faster, San?"

Your answer comes as you bite my lip, sucking it into your mouth harshly before leaning forward and capturing my mouth in a deep kiss, one of your hands leaving my forearm to push between our bodies, my lips sliding wetly from yours as your hand reaches down to press hard between my legs. Breathless, I concentrate on keeping my fingers still as you continue to work yourself against them, your pleasure my main goal despite the sharp desire tugging at my belly as the seam of my jeans presses at just the right angle against my clit.

My free hand grabs a handful of your sweatshirt as we rock our bodies together, your husky voice slightly strained as you look over at me, "Is this what you wanted? To fuck me with all these people walking around?"

Grateful as you brace the back of your hand against your thigh, I rut against the pressure of your fingers against my center, mindless of the sounds of people and special effects filtering in around us, "God, yes."

"When?"

Groaning as I feel your body start to tremble, I have to swallow hard and shake my head slightly, lust making my brain run just a little bit slower than normal, "When what?"

Turning your head, you kiss me as another group of teenagers go past, the sweat starting to build underneath my clothes as we continue to move against each other, the stale air in the shed starting to become a little stifling. As soon as they are gone, you pull out of the kiss and flick your tongue slowly against my bottom lip, your brow furrowing as you grip my forearm tighter, "When did you decide you were going to do this?"

Grinning, I press a quick kiss to your lips, blocking out the feeling of the muscles burning in my forearm and legs as I keep my eyes on you, your dark hair starting to stick to the sweat on the side of your face, "Two seconds after I saw the shed and nothing jumped out at us."

You push out a laugh through a moan as you change the angle of your hips, your tongue wetting your lips as you return my kiss, "That's my clever girl."

A loud girlish scream makes both of us jump slightly and we both suddenly realize that our time undiscovered is probably coming to end. The telltale music and fog machine click on again and without looking away from each other, we both start to move a little faster, our motions moving the shed slightly.

"We have to hurry. Come for me, San."

"God…"

"Right now, all over my fingers…"

I trail off as you groan loudly at my words, your eyes closing as you give yourself over to your pleasure, your moans growing louder despite my urgent whispers to try and be quieter. I want to reach up and cover your mouth or kiss you, something to dampen the noises you are making as I hear the fog machine cut off, suddenly the fear of being caught coming to life inside my brain, but I can't find it in me to move or to care. I can feel your wetness all over my fingers, your clit hardening further as your hips start to move with more purpose, my own impending orgasm causing me to tighten my fist against your sweatshirt and press my forehead to your temple.

It only takes a few more seconds before you're coming all over my hand, my fingers slipping inside you as your body curls into mine, your orgasm muffled against my fleece as you bury your face against my neck, the pulsing around my fingertips causing my legs to start trembling as my own pleasure burns hot inside me. Reaching down, I hold your hand against my jeans, a few hard, quick thrusts and then I'm breathing out through my release, the force of my orgasm not the strongest in my life but enough to take the edge off and definitely enough to have me leaning heavily against your body, your free hand reaching up to weakly massage the back of my neck.

Kissing your cheek, I slowly remove my fingers from inside you, wiping them on the outside of your underwear as you roll your eyes playfully at me. Bending down with a groan, I bite my lip as my jeans shift against my sensitive center, a weak clench causing me to brace one hand against your thigh. Reaching down, I pick up my beanie and hand it to you, pulling your jeans up and getting them closed as you reach out and push the beanie back down on my head. Both of us take a moment to adjust our clothes, laughing at each other as we each shake out our legs a little bit. Waiting as another group goes past us, I'm stopped from leaving the shed as you grab my hand, sliding your fingers between mine as you pull me softly against you, rolling up slightly on your toes as you kiss me gently. Cupping the side of your face, I return the kiss just as gently, my tongue moving slowly against yours as you lightly squeeze my hand. Ending the kiss, I lean back and look at you, returning the dopey smile you have on your face as I gesture towards the doorway, "You ready to finish the rest of the haunted house?"

The rest of the walk through was just as scary and goofy as the first part, your post-orgasmic haze allowing for more laughter to escape you than scowls or screams, though I can tell you were grateful when we finally reached the huge mouth full of fangs that served as the exit. I feel a rush of warmth in my chest as you keep holding my hand when we leave the attraction, your smile just slightly shy as the guy manning the exit looks down at our hands and then back up at us with an eyebrow raise.

Walking down the wooden ramp, I spot my parents and little sister waiting for us by the gate that lets us out of the area, raising my free hand to wave at them as you reach up and brush your hair away from your face.

My little sister pulls away from my dad's hand as she rushes over to stand in front of us, walking backwards as we make our way to my parents, her voice excited as she looks up at you, "Brittany told my mom you were super scared to go in there. You must have been really scared, right Mom? Her hair is still messy from running from the ghosts. Hey, was it hot in there? 'Cause you're still sweating. Was it from screaming? Dad, can I go in there?"

I feel your fingers tighten against my hand as your smile freezes on your face and I pretend to reach up and adjust my beanie, covering a laugh with my forearm. Looking over, I see my dad blushing as he goes to hold my little sister's hand again, distracting her with talk of trying to win another stuffed animal at the water balloon game. My mom simply shakes her head as she turns to follow them but I can see the small smile lift the corner of her mouth before a tug on my hand brings my attention back to you, your cheeks tinged red as you rub your hand across your eyes.

Taking pity on you, I let go of your hand and instead drape my arm across your shoulders, placing a kiss against your warm cheek as I start to walk us back towards the midway again, "Just think, it could have been worse."

"I don't see how. Your parents totally think we hooked up in there."

"We did hook up in there. But, like I said, it could have been worse."

Making an exaggerated face, I playfully nip at your earlobe as you laugh and jerk away from me, both of us giggling as I raise my hands into fake claws and chase after you, "You could have had your sooooul eaten by an eviiiil ghost."

"That's not funny, Britt."

Stopping in front of you, I rest my hands on your shoulders, smiling widely at you as you wrap your arms around my waist and step a little bit closer to me, "Aw, San. It's okay. I'll always protect you."

"Promise?"

"Promise."