Title: There's No Place Like Home
Category: Books » Twilight
Author: Lady Gwynedd
Language: English, Rating: Rated: T
Genre: Romance/General
Published: 11-15-12, Updated: 11-15-12
Chapters: 1, Words: 5,025

Chapter 1: Chapter 1

There's No Place Like Home

(A continuation of The Note)

My hands tightened on the steering wheel as I drove past the familiar "Welcome to Forks" sign. It had rained all the way from Seattle turning the week old snow to slush and making driving less than relaxing. My stomach was in knots and my palms were sweating but I couldn't tell if it was because of the driving conditions or because it just felt weird coming back here after three years of being away.

Since the last time I was here, I went from being a naïve, high school girl still crushing hard on my first boyfriend to an older and somewhat wiser woman and well aware of how places change just like people do.

I'd certainly changed, most definitely. I wasn't a dewy-eyed kid any longer, that's for sure. I still wore my hair long and the same style of clothing but they fit me differently now that I was a little curvier than I used to be. My face had thinned out and I plucked my brows a little more but really, I looked pretty much the same as I had when I lived here with my dad. It was just that now I was a woman and then I was a girl.

But the biggest change was in my outlook. Back then, I was a firm believer in true love and soul-mates and forever. Since then, I had discovered all that was nothing more than a combination of Mother Nature fucking with my hormones and propaganda. Literature liked to romanticize sex and so, like just about everyone else, I had bought into whole sale it when I was a teen. I'd believed I'd even met my soul-mate. Boy, was it a shock to discover he wasn't.

Shaking my head, I remembered bawling my eyes out the day I left for college. I had been accepted into a school in Florida, and it was too good an offer to turn down. Because my mom was a resident there, I could get in-state tuition rates and with my scholarships and grants, I could go to school almost for free if I kept my grades up.

My boyfriend was going to school in Chicago, also an offer too good to refuse, and though we made many promises to remain together, after a few months apart, our emails stopped, phone calls dwindled and texts became general. By the end of that school year, he was my ex-boyfriend. We hadn't formally broken up—there was no emotional Armageddon—we just stopped. I kept on waiting for that call that never came or that email that was never sent and I figured he was done with me.

I was hella busy, though. When I had a break from my student work load I mourned our defunct relationship, which was hardly ever—that five hour calculus class was a bitch—, but my studies distracted me and eventually my new friends diverted me even more. The last time I had heard from Edward Cullen was a goofy birthday card he sent me my sophomore year. I was sure his pre-med program had been keeping him every bit as busy as my studies did me.

I'd dated a few times since but nothing too serious. I didn't have the time. I was dedicated to making the best I could out of school. First, so that I could stay in school; to keep my scholarships, I had to maintain a 3.0 GPA and, let me tell you, that was tough to do in Engineering. I'd never worked so hard in my life. Second, I was determined to land a good job and I was almost there. I had a semester left and then, hopefully, I'd launch my career.

Though hard, I had put my love for math and science together and studied Engineering—Environmental Engineering, specifically. The only problem was, due to the damn economy, I didn't have a job lined up after I received my degree. I was hoping that would change as I got closer to graduation, so I wasn't going into panic mode yet.

I waited at a red light as a lumber truck barreled through the intersection and was surprised by an overwhelming wave of nostalgia. I cracked the window a little and inhaled.

There it was: Forks, Washington—the fresh smell of rain and evergreens, with a little bit of diesel on the side.

It was good to be back. I discovered I'd missed Forks.

I'd have come back sooner if things had worked out differently but my father, Charlie, had decided to travel to me for the holidays rather than me traveling to him. He said that Christmas in Florida was a welcomed change from the gloom of the Olympic peninsula and we continued the tradition. But this year my step-father, Phil, took my mom on a trip to celebrate their anniversary and so there was no reason for me to stay in Florida. Dad couldn't get off work because one of his deputies was out on paternity leave, so here I was back in teeny, rainy, homey Forks.

However, as I drove down the main street it didn't seem like Forks had changed much at all. The gas station still had a decimal point missing from the price sign so that regular gas looked to passersby as though it cost $411 per gallon. The diner seemed to have the same cars out in front as it did when I left and the blue plate special was still being advertised for seven bucks a shot. I was very familiar with the special. My dad seemed to live off of them when I wasn't around to cook.

The twinge of guilt I felt at neglecting Charlie made me pull into the Thriftway. I'd decided to make him a good dinner tonight, just like old times. He had to work today, hence the reason I drove a rental up from the airport, so I knew I had time to make him something good.

There would be no sneaking into and out of the one grocery store in this small town, a fact I'd sort of forgotten, and so it wasn't long before I was spotted.

"Why, if it isn't Bella Swan!"

I turned and recognized Shelly Cope, Forks High's front desk operator and the kindest woman I'd ever met. "Hi, Mrs. Cope. How are you?"

She rushed up to me grinning as though her face would split in two and grabbed my hands. "I'm just fine, Bella. We haven't seen you here in years! It's so good to have you home!"

Her last wore echoed in my ears. Home. Yeah. That's what it felt like. I was home.

We chatted for a bit and then I finished my shopping. I decided to swing by the station before going home, just to say hello to dad and let him know I was here. Besides, I had a sudden yearning to see him.

I pushed through the door of the small police station to see my dad sitting at his desk, frowning over a report.

"Hey, dad!" I called out.

The blinding smile that lit his face warmed my heart as he rose to pick me up, swinging me around. "Bells! You're here!"

I laughed. "Yes, dad. You knew I was coming today."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. It's just good to have you home again." He released me and held me at arm's length.

"When did you grow up?"

"Daaaad!" He was always treating me like I was twelve.

"I know, I know. You're an old lady. Listen, I've got a few hours' worth of work left before I can go. Why don't you go home and settle in. I'll take you out for dinner."

"Nope. It's my treat tonight. I stopped by the Thriftway and bought some ribs. You up for some bar-be-que?"

Dad's eyes lit up like I'd just announced salmon were running in the Sol Duc River. "Sure!"

We said our goodbyes and soon I was unlocking the front door to Charlie's modest home. As I discovered earlier, smells have a way of creating a déjà vu of feelings. Dad's house always smelled the same; dust, a faint whiff of Bengue, and gun oil. He kept a tidy place for a bachelor, even though the dining room table was used more for cleaning his guns than eating upon. Dad had his priorities.

I unloaded the car and decided to wash up a bit before I'd put the ribs on. It'd been a long day traveling and I'm sure I looked a wreck. I went upstairs and dug around in my dresser drawer trying to find an old band to pull my hair back and stumbled upon a folded triangle of notebook paper I'd evidently saved from my high school days.

Of course I recognized it.

Smiling, I gently unfolded the paper to read what I'd read four years ago that changed my teenaged life:

"Dear Bella,

I was hoping that maybe we could hang out. Meet me after school today in the stadium bleachers, if that's okay.

E."

Holding the old note in my hand, I plopped down on my bed as I remembered that day and Edward. Just the memory of how we had been together warmed my heart. He was a spectacular first boyfriend and I knew I'd been lucky. We'd shared many firsts the year we were together and he would always have a sweet place in my heart.

I wondered what he was up to now. It was sad that I didn't know. Really, the only person from my high school years that I kept in touch with was my besty, Angela Webber, and that was because she was better at communicating than I was.

Angela and Ben were still a couple. They'd gone off to school together in Oregon and she was hoping he'd finally get her an engagement ring for Christmas this year. They were both going to be in Forks for the season, so we had made tentative plans to meet up. I couldn't wait to see her.

Smiling, I refolded the note and put it back in my drawer. A few minutes later, I was downstairs lost in the preparation of delicious baby back ribs.

After dinner, I called Ang to let her know I was in town and since neither one of us could wait to see each other she came right over to spend some quality and much missed girl time together.

Charlie settled down in his easy chair with a beer, content to watch whatever game was playing, a pleased grin on his face. I could tell he liked having girlish chatter and laughter in the house again, even though he pretended to roll his eyes. And Ang and I did revert to our teen age years when we got together. We were giddy and goofy as fifteen year olds.

"Oh, Angela, I can't tell you how good it is to see you! I've missed you so much!" I hugged my friend once more as we settled crossed legged on my old bed.

"It's been too long, Bella. I'm so glad you're home. Are you glad to be back to dinky, old Forks?"

"I have to admit I am. I never realized how much I missed the place until I drove here today. I guess I'm a bit nostalgic. Oh! You'll never guess what I found in here!" I got up and went to my dresser and fetched the old note.

"Do you remember this?" I handed it to my friend with a grin.

Angela unfolded it and snorted out a laugh. "Oh, yeah! Edward…you were so clueless."

"I know right? He told me later he'd had a crush on me since I moved here my junior year."

"It took him long enough to act on it."

"Seems I intimidated him." I remembered Edward explaining that then but I could hardly believe it. I was so relationally dense in those days.

"I guess you were a little intimidating in high school."

"No way! I was as shy as a mouse."

"Bella, you were so smart and had absolutely no poker face. When someone said something dumb, your expression told them and everyone else exactly how moronic you thought they were."

"You're kidding? Boy, you guys must have thought I was an asshole."

"No Bella, you weren't. You were just so much beyond the rest of us. We knew it even if you didn't."

I shook my head and Ang handed the note back to me and asked, "Have you kept in contact with Edward?"

"Actually, I haven't," I admitted. "Are his parents still here?"

"Sure. Dr. Cullen still works in the emergency room at the hospital and Mrs. Cullen's still a guidance counselor at Forks High. Since I've moved out of town, I don't see much of them, though."

I chuckled remembering Esme Cullen. "Did you know Edward's mom fixed it so that in our senior year he and I shared most of our classes?"

"Really? Why'd she do that?"

"Edward asked her to."

"And mama was matchmaking?"

"She was! I wonder if she did that for Alice and Jasper?"

"That would have been more difficult since they were in different grades."

"Oh, that's right. What did Alice do after graduation?"

"I think she ended up at the same school Edward did. She and Jasper both."

"Are those two still dating?"

"Heck, yeah! They're joined at the hip."

I fiddled some with the note I'd still had in my hand and asked, "Have you heard anything about Edward?"

"You know, I don't think he's come back to Forks since he left, either. I talked to Alice a while back and she said he's been trying to get through school as quickly as he can by doubling up, no summer breaks. In fact, I think he's probably graduated. He must be in med school by now, I guess."

"That doesn't surprise me. He was dead set upon becoming a doctor even when I knew him."

"You really haven't seen him since you left for college?"

"No. We went our separate ways."

"How could that be? You two were so tight. Did you have a big break up?"

"Not really. We just petered out. I was busy. He was busy." I shrugged.

Angela got a gleam in her eye. "Maybe he's home for winter break?"

"I doubt it."

"Come on, Bella. If he ever came home at all, now would be the time for it. Maybe he's here!"

"It wouldn't matter if he were, Angela. We have nothing to do with each other anymore. He's moved on."

"How do you know?"

"He hasn't contacted me in two or three years. That would be a big clue, right there."

"Have you contacted him?"

"Well, er, no…"

"So, have you moved on?"

"Of course…of course...I think." But I wasn't sure about that. I'd really never taken the time to consider it. I'd been such an expert in distracting myself with schoolwork.

Angela snorted again. "Maybe, Miss You're-So-Smart-But-Oh-So-Oblivious, he thinks you've moved on and you think he's moved on but in reality neither one of you has."

"It's been three years."

"And what have you done in three years?"

"School."

"Him, too! Have you been going out with anyone else?"

"Sure. Sometimes. Once in a while."

She just lifted an expressive eyebrow. Bella was very familiar with Angela's eyebrows. They had a language of their own.

"Well, I went out with this guy named Garrett."

"When?"

"Last year."

"And…"

"And, he was nice but I was… I didn't…We weren't…I don't know Angela! Garrett was fine but I just wasn't interested in taking things further than a few dates."

"Why not?"

"I was too busy for anything more. Engineering is brutal."

"Yeah, yeah. You should call Edward."

"He's probably got a new number by now."

"Have you tried?"

"Well, no."

Angela glanced around the room until she spotted my cell phone on my bedside table. She grabbed it and started scrolling through.

"What are you doing?" She couldn't be trying to call Edward, could she? She wouldn't do that!

"Ah ha! You still have his number in here!" She pushed the link as I dove across the bed.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" I screeched as she shoved the phone at me.

I scrabbled at the phone trying to end the call before it got started but I heard a faint, "Hello?" coming from it.

Oh shit.

I put the phone to my ear. "Edward?" I said hesitantly.

"Bella? Bella! Is that you?"

My throat dried and suddenly tears welled behind my eyes. Hearing his voice brought back such an amazing amount of emotions, like a wall had fallen and everything I'd shoved behind it was spilling out.

"Yes, Edward, it's me. How are you?" I managed to choke out.

"I'm good…great. Wow. It's so good to hear from you!"

"I…I…I wasn't sure that you still had this number."

"Oh, yeah, it's still the same. Er, uh…how's your dad?'

"He's fine, thanks."

"That's good. Uhm…Where are you?"

"I'm in Forks."

"Really? That's great! When did you come?"

"I just got here today."

"And you're staying with the Chief?"

"Yeah. I'm home for Christmas. You know."

"I'm home, too, doing the same."

I was stunned to hear we would be so close. Shock seemed to short-circuit my finesse and I couldn't think of anything to say that wouldn't make me sound like a complete idiot.

After an uncomfortable pause, he asked, "So, how's Charlie?"

"He's good." I had to chuckle because he'd already asked that question. It seemed that we were both groping here.

After a few more seconds of excruciating silence I decided to put us both out of our miseries and so I said, "Well, it's been nice talking to you, Edward. Have a great Christmas."

"Oh…" Did he sound disappointed? "Well, okay then. Take care, Bella. It was great hearing from you."

"Yeah. Me too. Uh…you, too, I mean. Goodbye."

"Goodbye."

I hurried up and pressed end and turned to Angela. "I could kill you."

She had been sitting there during the whole conversation with her hand over her grin and a gleam in her eye.

"Why? You got to talk to him."

"Yes but it was so uncomfortable." I flopped back on the bed. "I could die."

"Die? Why ever for? It sounded to me that he was glad to hear from you."

"That's what he said but…he was just being nice."

"Bellllllaaaaa."

"Aanngggeeelllla." I mocked her right back.

"Edward wasn't ever just nice to you. He liked you, Bella. He loved you."

"Angela, we were kids. That was then, this is now."

"Are you going to get together?"

"He didn't ask."

"But he knows you're in town."

"Yeah."

"So…"

"Stop it, Angela! I can't deal with this now."

I guess the combination of the desperation in my voice and my teary eyes made Angela back off. She was a good friend, after all. She changed the subject and the rest of the evening was spent catching up with each other. We didn't discuss Edward again.

My dreams that night were weird. Maybe it was the sound of rain on the roof right above my head but I kept on dreaming about rivers and streams and creeks rushing by, cutting off the path I had to follow. No matter where I turned or which path I took, eventually some body of water would block me and I could go no further. I felt stuck and panicked and woke with a start to see the early morning light just beginning to filter through the curtains into my room.

I heard the engine of dad's cruiser start up and soon drive off. I realized that for the first time in weeks, I could sleep in and so, I rolled over and tried to settle back into bed but my eyes caught sight of the old note Edward had given me as it sat on my night stand. I sighed and remembered last night's phone call.

Edward's voice awoke a longing in me that I'd been able to ignore for years by bottling it up, shoving it away, pretending it didn't exist. But he was now only minutes away. I could see him again if I wanted. I could see if this feeling was just another case of nostalgia or if it was something more.

And I wasn't sure which I wanted it to be.

If I felt more than he did, I'd be opening myself to incredible heart break but a line from Tennyson popped into my head out of nowhere.

'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

This whole time I had been lying on my side, thinking about my recent revelations and staring hard at the note lying upon my nightstand. It took a moment before I heard the knocking on the front door.

I sat up straight in bed, my heart pounding. I knew exactly who it was. I jumped out of bed and peered out from behind my curtain. Sitting in the drive way was a black Mercedes Benz, very similar to the one I remembered Dr. Cullen driving and I'd even sat in several times back in the day.

Edward was here.

I heard the knocking again as I rushed to the landing, then remembering I most likely had a vicious case of morning breath, I ran back to the bath room, grabbed the mouthwash and took a swig, gargled, and spat. I looked in the mirror as the knock came again. Edward would leave if I didn't get down there soon. I pulled the hair tie out of my hair and quickly dragged my brush through it. There was nothing I could do about the sweatpants and t-shirt I normally slept in but Edward had seen me in something similar before and even less. I don't think he'd be surprised or weirded out.

I dashed down the stairs but right before I pulled open the door, panic hit. What if it wasn't Edward? What if it was someone else? Maybe his sister? Maybe his dad? It was his dad, I'd bet. He came to tell me that his son has moved on and not to bother him again.

I got a grip and told myself to stop. I was just psyching myself out and being stupid. I was able to freak myself out so easily over these things.

Whoever was at the door knocked again and I jumped. Swallowing and taking my courage in hand, I turned the knob and pulled the door open and saw…

Edward.

He was every bit as beautiful as I remembered, maybe even more so. His reddish-brown hair was a tussled mess, as though he'd been running his hands through it like he used to when he was tense. His features were more defined—sharper—as though any lingering baby fat from childhood had been whittled away over the years we'd been parted. But his eyes…they were the same as I remembered and filled with so much emotion.

We stood there, hearts stopped, breaths held and stared.

I didn't realize I'd moved but suddenly I was in his arms and found that more than driving down Main Street, more than smelling the rain and the firs and the gun oil or seeing old friends or even my dad, in Edward's arms I truly was home—home at long last.

I could feel Edward's lips as they kissed my hair and at his whispered, "Bella," I lifted my head. The soft look in his eyes almost killed me. This was what I remembered from our time together, this intense connection. I felt safe and loved and treasured and wondered what in the hell I had been thinking to believe that all this had been was just hormones and hype. This was real; the realist real I'd ever known.

When our lips met, I just about swooned and when I became aware of my surroundings again, I was sitting on Edward's lap, in his arms, on the old plaid sofa in dad's living room.

"I've missed you," Edward said.

"I missed you, too. Why did we stay away for so long?"

He shrugged. "I thought you were busy."

"I thought you were, too."

"Well, I was actually but I was never too busy for you."

"So, why didn't I ever hear from you?"

"I wasn't sure you wanted to hear from me anymore."

"Edward, I always wanted to hear from you. When I didn't, I thought you'd moved on."

"I suppose I just proved that's not the case."

"You mean to tell me the fact it's been over three years since we've seen each other and two years since we've spoken had only to do with the fact you thought I didn't want to see you and I thought you didn't want to see me?"

He sighed. "I guess so."

"That's just stupid."

"Moronic."

"Idiotic."

"Silly."

"Juvenile."

"And maybe a good thing," he added.

"A good thing? I think my heart was broken!"

"Mine was too, but we were very busy and maybe we needed to take the time to focus on our studies."

"Maybe." I thought of the sleepless nights, study sessions, panic attacks and general stress I had gone through over the past few years and realized he had a point. During my undergrad, I had been a crazy person.

But then I thought that if he had been just a phone call, text message or email away I would have had some solace, someone to confide in and he would have had the same with me in return.

"No, that's bullshit, Edward. We've always been better together than apart. I really missed us…us as girlfriend and boyfriend but more than anything, us as friends. I really missed my Cullen."

"And I really missed my Champ."

"I don't want to go without you again."

He nodded. "But you're still in Florida and I'm in California now, even further away from you than Chicago was."

"California?"

"Yes. San Francisco. UCSF Medical School and I'm still working like a maniac."

I nodded. "I'm finishing my Engineering degree at UF next semester. I'm still working like a fool, too, but it would help to know you were just a phone call away."

"I've got years left before I'll have my medical degree. I don't want to weigh you down."

I didn't answer him; I just gave him 'the look.' You know 'the look?' The one your old teacher gave you when you told her your dog ate your homework? Or your dad gave when you swore you weren't making out upstairs in your bedroom with your boyfriend when he came home unexpectedly.

Yeah, that'd happened once or twice back in the day.

Edward did have the grace to look sheepish.

"Look Cullen, I tried living without having you in my life and it sucked. You're my best friend and we were stupid for thinking that wasn't important or necessary. I'm not expecting anything more than just Cullen and Champ but I won't do without that at least. Please?" I hope he agreed. I knew in my heart that letting him go again would kill me.

"You don't want us to be Edward and Bella?" He sounded disappointed.

I shook my head slightly wondering how he could think that after the kiss we had just shared. I was still on his lap for goodness sake! My arms were around his neck and his were wrapped around me as though he wanted to have me stay there.

I decided that actions were the only things that were going to prove what I wanted more than any words, and so I pushed my fingers through his hair and kissed him the way he did me all those years ago in the Forks High stadium bleachers when we stopped being Cullen and Champ and started being Edward and Bella.

I guess I convinced him because we spent the rest of our Christmas break together and when we went back to our studies we called, texted, emailed or Skyped at least twice a day. I spent my spring break in San Francisco interviewing for jobs and we were so happy when I was hired by a premier firm whose headquarters was within three blocks of Edward's school.

I was surprised when Edward showed up unannounced at my graduation and even more so when later on that evening he dropped down on one knee and proposed. We were married not too many months later and found we were always home when we were together.

And, like Dorothy said in the Wizard of Oz, there's no place like it.