Disclaimer: I don't own 進撃の巨人

Author's Notes: So, I finally decided to do a multi-chaptered MikaEren! I've had this story planned out for weeks but just didn't have time to get it down on paper. And I also had writer's block. However, I read some amazing SnK fanfics which gave me inspiration (two are listed in the author's notes at the end of the chapter) and finally had a few hours free today, so wrote this down.

This fic will probably be 3-5 chapters long at the max, but maybe more if I really decide to develop it. It's a romance/action with some angst in the middle (nothing too bad, I promise!) Sorry if the length of the chapter bothers anyone! I have a propensity for writing rather long chapters.

There will be Eren/Mikasa of course, along with some Jean/Mikasa (one-sided mostly).

I hope you enjoy it! Please read and review, and to those of you who have reviewed my other SnK works, thank you so much for your kind words! I really appreciated them, this one is for you guys!

Warning: I'm rating this as M because though there isn't any smut planned (hopefully my story won't write itself into smut as some of my previous ones have) there are some mentions of M-rated topics and language. And of course, violence, eventually with those Kyojin.

Also, I have used a couple Japanese words here and there (not many, only about three!) Just in the few cases where there isn't an English equivalent/the English equivalent bothers me. I hope this isn't a problem. The translations are provided at the bottom.

Also, spoilers up to the most recent manga chapters!

Edit: August 21st - edited some minor grammatical errors. Also edited out 1-2 portions of angsty!Eren because it seemed a bit OOC. A lot of reviews mentioned they found Jean a little OOC too in a certain part. I wrote him that way largely influenced by a lot of the Jean portrayals floating around on tumblr (that show him as Mikasa-sexual/a flirt/using lame pickup lines etc) but I realized that isn't quite true to his manga persona. I cut the scene from the story, but I've kept it at the very end as a kind of delete scenes/parody-type thing, so whoever is interested can still read it without worrying about it breaking the flow of the story for them.


Losing Control

Chapter One: Transfer


"Calm down," Armin muttered, patting Mikasa's arm. "Don't kill anyone, please."

"That damned midget," Mikasa snarled, her expression so frightening that even Jean was taken aback. Her death glare, however, was directed at one person.

"What's he even doing here," Connie wondered. "I thought he was injured after that whole female Titan fiasco…"

"Apparently he's recovered," Armin said, as Lance Corporal Levi limped through the crowd of soldiers. "Mikasa-"

"Didn't he help you rescue Eren?" Jean asked. "I'd think you would hate him less-"

"He may be good at slaying Titans," Mikasa spat, "but that doesn't change the fact that he's a sadistic four-foot little greaseball that-"

"Actually I am just over five feet, Ackerman," a cold voice drawled, "And not that it is any of your concern, but what I put in my hair is high quality gel."

Armin and Connie both gasped, and Jean looked quite taken aback by the sudden appearance of the Corporal. They all hastily stood up and saluted, Connie knocking over his chair in the process.

Mikasa did not such thing, though her expression increased its likeliness to some sort of demon queen as she glowered at Levi.

"You can sit down," Levi rolled his eyes at the saluting trio, before turning to meet Mikasa's murderous gaze.

"Ackerman."

"What?"

"Is that how you greet a superior?"

Mikasa swallowed, and then stood up, clenching her fist and curling it against her chest in a stiff salute.

"Levi-heichou," she muttered through gritted teeth, every syllable sounding like a curse.

"Walk with me."

"Wh-what?!" Mikasa was so taken aback that she even dropped her glare for a moment.

"There are things I'd like to discuss with you. Walk with me."

Mikasa narrowed her eyes.

"Is it about Eren? What did you-"

"Ackerman, it's an order," Levi snapped, and Mikasa grudgingly followed him out of the hall, as every single soldier in the room stared after them.

"What could he possibly want with Mikasa?" Jean sounded more than a little concerned. "This is the first time he's even been out of his room since his injury, and he wants to talk to her?"

"He was limping," Connie whispered, awed. "Must've been something pretty important for him to come get her himself…"

Armin picked at his food uneasily.

Erd Gin. Petra Ral. Auruo Bossard. Gunter Shulz. The elite of the elite. Hand-picked by Lance Corporal Levi. Fearsome Titan slayers. Legends in their own right. Each holding their own records for titans killed.

And slaughtered. Every single one of them, wiped out. Dead. Gone.

"I – I don't have a good feeling about this at all," he muttered.


"It's always been a source of such bewilderment to me, you know?" Hanji's eyes glimmered fanatically, "Where do they go?!"

Eren shifted uncomfortably in his seat, not at all happy with the direction this conversation had taken. Of course, discussions with Hanji always tended to be eccentric, to put it euphemistically, but this one in particular, took the cake.

"I mean, everything else stays in tact, you know, if not slightly off proportion. Limbs, features, eyes, ears! The female Titan even had a more distinguishable chest, if you catch my drift."

Eren exchanged uncomfortable glances with Keiji and Raye, the two other soldiers present in the room. Both were members of the Recon Corps, and both had been selected a couple weeks prior, as the newest additions to Levi's Special Operations Squad.

Or rather, as replacements, since all the previous members had died.

Both were older than Eren, in their mid-twenties. Keiji was big-boned, dark-skinned, with short, cropped dark hair and fierce eyes. Raye was of a slimmer build, fair-skinned, with black hair that swept across his forehead and light blue-grey eyes.

They were both amiable enough from what Eren knew of them, but he was becoming increasingly careful not to build any attachments.

It wasn't easy, since they trained together and had all their meals together, and even lived together, in a secluded part of the castle, away from all the other trainees. Eren had barely even seen Mikasa or Armin after the last disastrous mission.

He found he missed them more than he thought he would. They had never really been separated for long before, especially Eren and Mikasa, who had been together almost every single day of their lives since he had rescued her at the age of nine.

Eren found that he actually missed Mikasa, even with her constant fussing and nagging.

"-hanging around like oversized sausages, would be kind of awkward if your 3DMG got caught up in one, wouldn't it," Hanji was rattling on, but Eren had soon drifted off into his own thoughts, which was really the most effective strategy to counter Hanji's didactic tendencies.

Keiji on the other hand looked ready to vomit, and Raye quickly spat out the sausage he had been eating.

"Worse would be if you accidentally got knocked aside by one, hah, that's a tale to tell your fellow soldiers-"

"Hanji-san," Raye choked. "Please – could you not-"

I wonder what they're up to right now, Armin and Mikasa...

He was interrupted from his thoughts however, by Hanji shaking his shoulder, her face eerily close to him and a disturbing gleam in her eyes.

"Have you then, Eren? Ever had sexual thoughts about her, ever been sexually excited by her presence-"

"Wh-what?!" Eren spluttered. "Hanji-san! She's my – she's family-"

"Hm, interesting that you would refer to her as that, but I suppose you are both of the same kind. Don't worry Eren, it would be only natural, given how close you two had to be during all the fighting."

"I don't – I've never –" Eren felt his face and neck heat up.

"I suppose the lack of sexual organs after transformation really did prevent you from experiencing any visceral response after all." Hanji looked disappointed. "Titan mating would certainly prove an interesting topic of study."

"Mating?! We don't bloody need more of them!" Keiji yelped.

"Wh – who are you even talking about?" Eren asked, bewildered. "Actually, forget it, I don't want to know…"

Fortunately, the grotesque conversation was cut short by the arrival of Levi.

"Heichou!" Eren cried, "You're walking! Your leg – "

"Has healed, Eren, yes." Levi sounded bored. "Not everyone posses instantaneous regeneration capabilities like you, but we do heal eventually. Next time, try not to get yourself kidnapped so easily, will you?"

Eren gulped.

"Of course, you already did," Levi noted. "I'm aware, Irvin told me. And it took him leading an army of Titans and your over-protective sister to set you free…"

"I – I'm sorry," Eren said. "I-"

"Drop it," Levi told him, "I have a little surprise for you all, though I think Eren in particular will find it to his liking."

"Did we capture another Titan?" Hanji asked hopefully.

"No," Levi said. "I have, however, just recruited the newest member of the Special Operations Squad."

"Oh?" Raye and Keiji both perked up at the mention of a new soldier joining them.

"Who is it?"

Eren was curious as well. From all the old Legion members, Levi had only selected two to be part of his team. Where would he suddenly find a third member from, unless…

"Hey," Mikasa nodded, stepping into the room.

"Mikasa!" Eren's eyes widened, his heart leaping to his throat.

Her face lit up when she saw him.

"Eren!"

"Our newest member." Levi gestured to her. "She graduated recently but I've fought alongside her myself, and she can probably kick all of your asses if she so wishes. Mikasa Ackerman, part of the 104th trainee squad, and the youngest member to join the Special Operations Squad in history."


"So… you're really here, huh? Part of the famous Special Operations Squad."

There was a tinge of jealousy in his voice, but Mikasa pretended not to notice it. She was just happy that she would finally get to be with Eren again, since she was now in the squad in charge of protecting him.

Levi had allowed them to take a walk around the castle grounds at night. Eren was never permitted to go out alone, and Levi had never fully trusted the other members of the squad with him, as talented as they may have been.

But for whatever reason, he had granted Mikasa's request. Eren was glad – he had been sick and tired of being cooped up inside, only allowed out of the castle for training with the other Spec Ops squad members.

"It's good. Now I can protect you."

Eren rolled his eyes at this, but was too pleased with the situation to snap at Mikasa as he usually did. Besides, he had come to miss her, over-protectiveness and all.

Not that he would ever tell her that; if he did, he surmised Mikasa would become intolerable.

"So I guess that means we'll be training together again, from tomorrow."

"Actually…" Mikasa trailed off, looking uncertain for a moment.

"What's up?" Eren asked her.

"Levi-heichou said – he said something about how he would be training me privately…"

She had hesitated saying the words, knowing what Eren's response would be like. His face darkened slightly.

"Why would he do that? What's wrong with having you train with the rest of us?"

"I don't know, he didn't give any reasons," Mikasa lied.

He had, though. Levi had told her that she was talented, far more talented than any of them. He thought that in time, given proper training, she could match even him. And that's what he wanted – to raise another soldier, as powerful as him, one that could be trusted to act in his stead.

Eren saw right through her feeble lie.

"Guess the famous Mikasa is too good for the rest of us, huh," he scoffed, his voice laced with bitterness. "Youngest member of the Spec Ops, and whatnot, plus special training with the corporal…"

"Eren, it's not like that. Please don't make it like that…" she pleaded.

Mikasa's heart sank. She had been so happy at the chance to fight alongside Eren, at the opportunity to grow stronger so that she could protect him better. But she had known, all along, that Eren wouldn't take it well.

He had always hated being reminded of the fact that she was stronger than him. And ever since they had been kids, he had always hated the notion of her protecting him.

From the very first time, when as a furious, nine-year old, he tried to beat up the boys who had been staring at her – and earned a black eye and bloody nose in the process – Mikasa had retaliated then, lashing out at the boys with her small but powerful fists, sending them packing. He'd been bitter then, and angry with her, though she couldn't understand why.

Armin had explained it to her later.

'He likes being the one protecting you,' Armin had said, 'Not the other way around. That's why it bothers him. He feels like it's wrong and he's not strong enough.'

But ever since then, it had always been that way. Mikasa knew it bothered Eren, but that wasn't enough to stop her, especially when his life was in danger.


A part of Eren had been excited by the prospect of getting to train with Mikasa again. But of course, he should have expected that she'd be too far ahead of him, even now.

Still, from the corner of his eye, he saw her slump slightly, the light going out of her eyes. He'd hurt her feelings with his little outburst, and Eren felt worse than before.

He knew he was often short with Mikasa. He knew she didn't deserve it. He felt guilty about it later too, a lot. But somehow, he could never stop himself at the moment, or bring himself to face her and apologize later.

"How are Armin, and all the others?" Eren asked, in way of changing the topic.

"They're fine," Mikasa said, easily enough, adopting her stoic mask again. "Armin misses you though."

"I was never really allowed to go out by myself to see you guys," Eren shrugged. "I managed to sneak out once, a week ago, but none of you were there."

"You shouldn't sneak out like that, it's unsafe!" Mikasa reprimanded him, but Eren ignored her.

"Apparently you'd gone out riding, that's what the stable boy had said."

"Yeah, they make us go out on our horses twice a week, to practice formations and ground fighting with the 3DMG," Mikasa said.

"We do that too. I wonder why we never have practice together though…"

"It's because of those three," Mikasa said, and Eren didn't have to ask her for clarification. "Ever since the fiasco with them, Irvin-danchou has become extremely suspicious of all the soldiers. They've posted guards on all the bunkers now, and that's why they moved you and your squad away. Anyone could turn out to be a Titan shifter. They've moved Annie away too, to some secret location that none of us know about, to prevent her from being kidnapped or rescued."

"Makes sense," Eren said, scowling as he remembered the soldiers who he had once considered his friends, "Can't believe them though! Bertholdt and Reiner seemed like such nice guys! I didn't really know Ymir. And Christa, I can't believe Christa chose them!"

"They're all traitors," Mikasa said viciously. "The next time I see them, I'll be cutting all their necks."

She sounded determined, and it bothered Eren. Mikasa had killed a man before, once, when they were nine, and he had killed two. But still, hearing her talk like this, like a cold-blooded killer, made him feel uneasy.

He remembered her as she once was, young, soft, innocent, wide dark eyes that sparkled when he told her stories about the outside world, a sweet smile, long hair that whipped around in the wind and he'd sometimes liked to play with when she feel asleep next to him in the meadow where they had gathered wood together, her head resting on his shoulder…

You were supposed to stay like that, Mikasa. You were never supposed to become a soldier like me. I was supposed to protect you from all of that.

"Do you want to go see them?" Mikasa asked suddenly, jolting him from his thoughts.

"Who?"

"Armin, and the rest. They'll probably be free now, for an hour or so before we all have to go to bed."

"Yeah," Eren nodded, brightened by the prospect of seeing their fellow squad mates. "Yeah, let's go see them."


They found Armin with Connie and Jean, lounging around outside the bunkers.

"Eren!" Armin and Connie sprung up when they saw him, rushing forward. "Long time!"

"Armin, Connie," Eren nodded, greeting them, before looking over at the other boy who was slowly walking towards them. "Jean."

"Eren." Jean nodded curtly. "Good to see you."

His gaze, however, was fixed on the girl next to Eren.

"So?" he asked Mikasa. "Is Levi-heichou stealing you away from us?"

"If you mean I'm joining his squad, then yes," Mikasa said.

"I just knew it," Armin said, as Connie whistled.

"That's Mikasa for you," Connie said, sounding awed. "Everyone's talking about how you're the youngest soldier to be recruited, though I'm surprised you've decided this quickly!"

"What do you mean?" Eren furrowed his eyebrows. "Why wouldn't she?"

"Well," Connie broke off awkwardly, realizing his slip up. "It's just – they're sent on the most dangerous missions you know. And after the last squad was wiped out altogether…"

Eren's stomach plummeted.

Because of me. They all died because of me.

There was no way he would let that happen with Mikasa though. Just no way.

Never again.

"Of course she'd take it, Mikasa loves risking her life for Eren, haven't you noticed?" Jean said acerbically. "She's making a hobby out of it, it seems."

"Jean," Mikasa said, a hint of warning in her tone.

Jean's hazel eyes narrowed defiantly, and he ground his teeth together.

"Mikasa – could I talk to you – alone please?" he bit out finally.

Eren was taken aback by this.

Why does he want to talk to her alone?

To his surprise, Mikasa agreed.

"Sure," she said, though her face was blank as she followed Jean a little away from the other three, till they were out of earshot.

Eren looked after them confused and Connie whistled again.

"The idiot! He's finally cracked! He's been talking about doing it for a couple weeks but I never thought he'd have the balls to go through with it!"

"With what? What is he doing? What are you talking about?" Eren asked Connie.

"Poor Jean," Armin said sadly. "It's going to crush him."

"Why do you say that?" Connie asked. "Jean's a great guy, one of the best! Sasha told me tons of the girls in the barracks are talking about him, they find him really attractive too."

"Still, it's Mikasa." Armin shook his head. "I know her."

"Can someone tell me what's going on?" Eren snapped.

He didn't know why, but the site of Jean leading Mikasa away to talk to her in private irked him.

"Oh gee, isn't it obvious Eren!" Connie exclaimed. "Jean's finally asking Mikasa out!"


Jean folded his arms, leaning against the wall.

"Sooo…" he rubbed the back of his head awkwardly, twisting the material of his shirt together with his other hand. "Now that you got me here and alone, whaddya wanna talk about?"

"You bought me here," Mikasa deadpanned.

"Heh heh," Jean chuckled awkwardly. "Of course I did."

"What did you want to talk about?"

"How have you been doing?" Jean asked casually.

"Jean. If you have something important to say, say it."

Ouch. She gets right to the point, doesn't she.

Jean hesitated for a moment. Mikasa could be pretty cold when she wanted to. Still, it had been bothering him for a long time, and Jean had always been one to speak his mind.

Oh, to hell with it.

"I don't think you should join the Special Operations Squad, Mikasa."

There. I said it, right out.

Mikasa's face was blank, but her voice was icy when she spoke.

"And why not?"


Eren was losing his patience.

"I don't get why it's so important that he needs to talk to her alone."

"What part of 'he's asking her out' did you not get?" Connie stared at Eren in bewilderment.

"I don't care what he's doing. He's wasting our time, Mikasa and I need to get back," Eren growled, stalking off towards the duo.

"Yo Eren, don't be such a cockblock," Connie called after him.

"Eren." Armin gripped his arm. "It's probably best you let them sort it out themselves."


"It's dangerous. Probably the most dangerous squad there is out there," Jean said.

"I am stronger than all of you."

Her voice was cold, but not arrogant. And what she said was nothing but the truth. Still, it stung.

"So were the other members of the squad. Petra, Aurou and the rest. Legends among mankind. That didn't stop the female Titan from wiping them out."

"Annie is rotting in her stupid crystal-"

"That doesn't matter! It's still dangerous Mikasa, and I know you're strong, but you're not like them! You're not even an adult yet! It's too early for you to be joining them!"

"Eren's there. They protect him. All I ever wanted to do was protect Eren."

Eren. Always fucking Eren. You can't see past that can you?

That stung him more than anything else she could say, but Jean had known it all along. Still-

"All for Eren? The very same Eren who tried to kill you-"

"Shut up!"

Her voice was cold as ever this time, but there was something in it that made a chill run down Jean's spine. He looked at her carefully, and noticed that her dark eyes were glistening.

He melted.

"Mikasa." he took a step towards her. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, but I've seen it, you know. I've seen you. You act all tough and defend him, but it hurt you too, didn't it?"

"Shut up. You don't know anything." Mikasa took a step away from him.

"Why can't you see, Mikasa? You only see him, but there are others here too, who care about you."

"No." Mikasa shook her head. "Stop it. I don't want to hear this."

"I care about you, Mikasa. You're one of the reasons why I'm still fighting on in this god-forsaken place, fighting those fucking giant bastards when all I wanted my entire life was to join the Imperial Police and live behind the walls! But still, when I thought of you outside, risking your life, I just didn't think I had it in me to stay behind them!"


Eren froze, Jean's words echoing in his head.

I care about you.

You're one of the reasons why I'm still fighting.

He felt like an eavesdropper, an intruder at that moment. He had never suspected that Jean felt so strongly about Mikasa.

How? He doesn't even know her that well! He barely knows her at all, compared to me. I've been with her for years!

It churned his gut to hear Jean spew out such nonsense about caring and fighting to Mikasa.

You don't understand anything! You haven't seen anything yet. You don't know what it means to care about someone, you don't know what it means to fight, to truly fight.

Images flashed before his eyes – Mikasa, curled up on the floor, her hands bound, a smudge of blood on the corner of her lips… a huge hand curling around his mother, lifting up… blood, blood splattering everywhere…


"Jean…" Mikasa's eyes were wide, "You – you can't mean that."

"I do." Jean took a step forward, placing his hands on her shoulders. "I know we haven't known each other as long as you've known Eren and Armin. But from the day I saw you, something about you just to drew me to you, Mikasa. I only ever cared about myself and my own safety. But I don't know why, off late, in regards to you, I find myself thinking about you and worrying about you, and I think I might-"

"Mikasa!"

Mikasa sprung back away from him, and Jean muttered a string of curses.

"Are you fucking blind, Eren?" Jean glared at the brown-haired boy, the very root of all his problems. "Can't you see we're trying to have a conversation!"

"Please, like Mikasa is interested in anything you have to say to her," Eren scoffed at him.

"Why you little-" Jean growled, starting forward, but Mikasa put a hand on his arm.

Her touch was gentle, barely there, just four fingers on his wrist, restraining him, but Jean found it affecting him nonetheless.

"Mikasa, come on," Eren said. "Let's head back."

"Eren. You go wait with Armin. I'll be there in a few minutes."

Both Jean and Eren stared at her. Jean could hardly believe his ears.

"It's fine, Eren. Go ahead. I need to talk to Jean. I'll be there soon."

Eren's face darkened.

"Talk to him all you want, like I care," he snapped. "Just hurry the hell up, or I'm walking back alone."

"You can't, I'm not supposed to let you out of my sight-"

"Well I don't want to be yelled at by Levi-heichou because of you!"

And then he stormed off, leaving Mikasa looking after him helplessly.

Jean realized his mouth was open, and quickly closed it.

Screw you, Eren! If it were anyone but you, I'd say they were jealous. But knowing you, you're just probably behaving like the selfish brat that you are.


"Eren, is everything okay?" Armin hurried towards his fuming friend. "You look upset, is something wrong?"

"Mikasa's being a pain, as usual, that's what's wrong," Eren muttered.

"Mikasa? You're mad at Mikasa again? What did she even do?"

"She – um…" Eren trailed off.

Crap. I snapped at her again, and she didn't even do anything. This is all Jean's fault, the asshole! But why do I even feel so angry?


"Mikasa, you can go, we'll talk later," Jean muttered, watching her out of the corner of his eyes.

He hated how Eren treated her, and he hated even more how it affected him to see her hurt.

"No, no it's fine." Mikasa slipped on her impassive mask again. "He'll wait for me."

"Mikasa, you don't have to hide it, not in front of me. I can see how it hurts you. I kind of understand, you know, in a weird way."

Mikasa narrowed her eyes at him again, and Jean sighed.

"Sometimes you chase too hard after someone who's just not into it, you know. I get it."

Mikasa frowned slightly at this.

"Everything you said to me just now… did you truly mean it?"

He felt like her dark eyes were gazing into his very soul, and Jean felt his heart flutter.

"What does it matter, even if I did," he mumbled to the ground, his cheeks reddening.

"Jean… there are only so few people I have the capacity to care about anymore. The world we live in is cruel, and this fate was decided for me six years ago."

She sounded apologetic. It was a rejection, as gentle of one as she could give him.

"You said that before. When we were fighting those Bertholdt and the rest. What did you mean, six years ago? What happened then?"

Mikasa's eyes glossed over.

"I'm sorry, I'd really rather not talk about it."

"Oh, okay. Sorry for prying. That's cool."

There was an awkward silence then, and Jean shuffled his feet.

"You care a lot about Eren, don't you Mikasa?"

"What are you getting at, Jean?"

"Is he really just a brother to you?"

"…"

"Or something more?"

"…"

"It's okay," Jean laughed bitterly, "The world is funny like that. Most girls would consider me better looking than him, you know. I'm taller, and stronger too, if you don't count his Titan shifting abilities. I could probably be nicer too, and I'd treat you right, try to protect you-"

"Eren has protected me before," Mikasa said fiercely. "When we were kids, he saved my life! And then again-"

"He also tried to kill you!"

"Stop bringing that up! It was an accident! He wasn't in his right mind!"

Mikasa sounded tearful, and Jean regretted it.

"Mikasa, look… I'm not trying to be a jerk here. But in that squad you're in, you'll be risking your life to protect Eren. And maybe you're a masochist or maybe you just enjoy that kind of thing, but I worry about you, okay! So at least, for my sake, if not yours, even if I don't mean that much to you… be careful, alright. I already lost one dear friend in Marco, and I don't think I can stand to lose you too…"

"I – I'm not sure what you're trying to get at," Mikasa looked confused.

"It's Eren." Jean sighed, "I don't know, that Titan form of his, I just have a bad feeling about it."

"Eren wants nothing more than to kill all the Titans and protect mankind."

"Yes, but sometimes I feel his burning ambition makes him lose sight of what's really important. I'm just asking you to be careful around him, that's all, Mikasa."

"…anything else you wanted to say?"

Don't go. You're beautiful. Forget Eren. Be with me, be mine forever.

"No," Jean chuckled wryly. "There's only so many times a guy can have his heart trampled on."

And then when Mikasa looked at him, he thought that for the first time, he saw a glimmer of compassion and understanding in her eyes.

"I'm really sorry, Jean. But I just can't."

She understood him though, he knew. Because the same pain that he was feeling, he'd seen it reflected in her eyes before. And she knew he knew.

Her fingers brushed against his cheek, the lightest of touches.

And then in a swish of black hair, she was gone.


Eren was silent for the first few minutes as they made their way back after bidding Armin goodbye.

He wouldn't last for long though, Mikasa knew. He had never been the patient type.

"So," Eren asked casually. "Quite a long talk you and Jean had back there... is anything up?"

"It was nothing. Don't worry about it."

"When did I ever say I was worried?" Eren ground out.

"…"

"Fine, keep your secrets, Mikasa, I don't care. I guess this means you're the one who has special feelings for Jean?"

"What are you talking about?" Mikasa asked, keeping her tone neutral. "There is no such thing between us."

"I don't know, if you can accuse me of having them for Annie of all people…"

"That means you don't?"

"Of course not! Where would you even get that crazy idea from?!"

Mikasa pulled her scarf up an inch, hiding the smile that tugged at her lips.


The next morning at breakfast, Eren fully expected to have Mikasa seated besides him, probably nagging him to finish his bread.

She wasn't there though. Nor was the corporal.

"Oh, you don't know?" Hanji exclaimed when Eren asked her. "He's training her personally."

"I'm aware of that," Eren said through gritted teeth, still not liking the idea of Mikasa's new 'personal training' business. "But wouldn't they at least eat with us, or is that personal too?"

"Heichou left with her at six in the morning to go train," Raye supplied helpfully, "and he said not to expect them till late."

"I see," Eren said, stabbing into his potatoes with a lot more force than necessary.

"Ooh, you seem upset, Eren!" Hanji observed, leaning forward excitedly. "If you'd like, I can ask Levi to train you privately too, though I'm not sure he'd be in for the kind of training your dirty little mind is thinking of!"

"Wh-what?! No!" Eren nearly choked himself, while Keichi sniggered.

"Of course, if you shifted into that beautiful Titan form for me, I wouldn't mind…" Hanji continued dreamily.

"I'm done eating, thanks!" Eren stood up hastily, excusing himself from the table.


Eren didn't see much of Mikasa for the next two weeks. It was practically like she hadn't been transferred at all, and was back with Armin and the rest. She was always gone in the mornings before he got up, and returned late at night, much after he had been locked back into his little jail cell that functioned as a room.

The room was well furnished, but it didn't change the fact that it was underground and had large iron bars where a door should have been. But Eren didn't grudge Levi for his room furnishings. It was necessary to keep him alive, to keep them all alive.

Eren stayed up one night, hoping that Mikasa would come visit him in his cell. He had really expected her to. It seemed like something she would do.

She didn't though, and he couldn't help but feel a curl of disappointment.

Levi-heichou must really be working her hard.

He saw her just once, while doing 3DMG drills deeper in the forest.

Just for a few seconds, a figure had twisted through the trees with an alarming agility and flown overhead. He would have never recognized it as her, if not for the maroon scarf that came fluttering to the ground a few moments later, having been ripped off with the pace she was moving at.

Shit! Nobody should be able to move that fast!

Eren walked forwards to pick up her scarf – his scarf – from the ground, just as one more figure, presumably Levi, zoomed overhead.

"What kind of god forsaken training is this?!" Keiji wondered aloud, looking up across the clearing to the other side of the forest, where a few fallen leaves were the only indication that two soldiers on their 3DMG's had been there just moments ago.


Eren finally caught hold of Mikasa that weekend when she was carrying two large boxes across the castle halls.

"Mikasa!" he hurried towards her.

"Eren!" Mikasa stopped in her tracks, setting the boxes on the ground. "How've you been! I'm sorry I haven't been able to see you."

"Did heichou finally decide to give you a day off?"

"Day off?" Mikasa scoffed. "That chibi and his cleaning fetish. Today he's decided to make me do his housework under the pretext of training."

"He made me do that when I first got here," Eren said reminiscently. "It was really annoying."

"Annoying hardly describes it. He's got some kind of obsessive compulsive disorder when it comes to cleaning, it seems," Mikasa ranted. "Three times he made me dust the damn storage room, three times. Nobody even uses that room. I finally convinced him to let me lift stuff instead, at least that way I get exercise."

"How's training going with him?"

"It's been… intense…"

"So you haven't 'set him straight' yet?" Eren teased.

"I would have, so many times, but-" Mikasa gritted her teeth, "-he may be short, but he's strong, and really fast."

"Hm..."

Eren realized that he'd never seen Levi in action, really in action except for the few seconds when he'd zoomed after Mikasa in the forest earlier. The same went for Mikasa. Whenever she'd rescued him, he had usually been incapacitated in one way or another. He'd heard about her skill rather than seen it.

I still have a long way to go if I want to catch up to them and kill Titans the way they can.

He didn't know if he was jealous of Mikasa and what she had grown into, or proud. Maybe it was an odd mixture of both.

"Don't you worry though, Eren. I will get back at him one day, for what he did to you in that courtroom!" Mikasa vowed.

"You really don't have to, he did what was required for my safety," Eren said placatingly.

"That's what the midget told me, but I still think he overdid it, the jerk." Mikasa fumed.

"Really, it's okay. Oh, by the way, I have something for you," Eren said, remembering as he rummaged in his pack.

"Huh?"

"Lose something?" Eren grinned at her, pulling out the red material.

"My – my scarf!" Mikasa cried, her eyes lighting up. "Oh, you found it! I'm so glad! I dropped it one day during training, and I searched for hours after, but I couldn't find it!"

"Actually, I believe it's my scarf," Eren corrected. "But you can have it again since you seem so attached to it."

He looped it around her neck, feeling a sudden sense of déjà vu. Mikasa's hands came up to touch the fabric, her dark eyes shining.

"Thank you," she whispered.

"Don't be stupid." Eren swallowed the lump in his throat, wondering what he was getting so emotional about.

An image flashed in his mind, a small, pale, shivering girl standing in the snow.

I'm cold and I have nowhere to go home anymore.

"Anyways!" Eren said quickly, jolting out of his reverie. "I'm actually kind of free right now. Those boxes look heavy, shall I carry them for you?"

"Oh, it's really fine." Mikasa shook her head. "I asked heichou to let me carry them, since he's depriving me of my time at the gym."

Stupid, stupid! Eren berated himself. It's Mikasa, what did you expect.

"Well, I can at least carry one of them for you."

"Really, Eren, it's fine, I don't need your-" she saw the flash of annoyance on his face, and backtracked. "That would be nice, actually, thank you."

Eren leaned down, sliding his fingers under one of the boxes.

He nearly toppled over at the effort it took to lift it.

What the fuck is in this?!

He struggled not to let the agony show on his face, feeling Mikasa's eyes on him.

How the hell was she carrying two of these without breaking a sweat? What is wrong with her?!

"So – where do we have to take these again?" Eren asked, as Mikasa resigned herself to letting him suffer and picked up the other box as if it were filled with feathers.

"The tower room," she said nonchalantly.

Five floors?! You're shitting me!

"Eren, are you sure you can-"

"Yeah, yeah, let's go already!"


"Eren. If you're going to just sit around, you'd rather be helping me sweep," Mikasa chided.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." Eren continued to sit where he was, swinging his legs off the windowsill as he peered outside, his broom laying forgotten besides him.

It was just like old times, whenever Eren's mother set chores for them. Mikasa would get all the work done, while Eren lazed around and slacked off.

Mikasa smiled to herself at the memory.

"This takes me back, you know," she said fondly.

"Takes you back to – oh. Yeah," Eren said grimly, his mouth hardening to a line.

He was silent after that, and Mikasa sighed. She shouldn't have bought it up. Thinking of happier times sometimes cheered her up.

But for Eren, it would almost always put him on a train of thought that led to the Titan attack and his mother's death, and then he would be sullen and irritable for hours.

He didn't have time to brood however, as the door slammed open and Levi sauntered in.

"Eren, get out. Ackerman, get ready."

"Heichou!" Eren jumped to his feet. "I was just helping Mikasa clean-"

"No you weren't, you were sitting around and being a lazy ass. Now leave. Ackerman, in position."

"What, here?!" Mikasa cried. "There's no space, and our 3DMGs are-"

"Stop pulling an Eren and use your damned brains, Ackerman. We're sparring hand to hand today. No weapons, no 3DMG."

"Right now?"

"Yes. Are you too tired from that measly sweeping? I thought that would suffice as a warm up for you."

She's been cleaning for five hours, Eren thought to himself, he's really brutal!

"No sir! I can fight, right now!"

She sounded determined, if not slightly excited. Mikasa had never fought hand to hand with Levi before.

But martial arts were something she specialized in, since she had been taught some of her clan's secret techniques as a child.

She couldn't wait to use it on Levi's smirking face, in payback for what he did to Eren.

Eren considered for a moment to ask if he could stay and watch, but then thought better of it.

"Good luck, Mikasa," he muttered, swiftly leaving the room.

You can finally have your revenge on him.


"Come at me with everything you've got, Ackerman," Levi told the girl once Eren had left. "I know you've been itching to punch my face in from that day in the courtroom. So remember that, and remember how I knocked your precious Eren's teeth out."

"Are you taunting me?" Mikasa growled at him, sliding into her fighting stance.

She seemed on edge, her eyes gleaming wildly.

She really does want to beat me up. Well that'll make this at least a bit interesting.

"No rules. Everything is allowed. Try to kill me for all I care, though there's no way you'll come close. Don't hold back, because I certainly don't plan to."

"Understood," Mikasa breathed heavily.

Levi smirked.

"Begin."


It was ten hours later when Mikasa Ackerman finally collapsed, her eyes fluttering shut.

Levi, who had been straddling her, his hands clamped deathly tight around her wrists, quickly slid off her, bringing two fingers to her right wrist.

He knew he hadn't killed her, just worn her out from a ridiculously intense training session, but he still felt an urge to check.

The pulse thumped beneath his fingers, and he heaved a sigh of relief, burying his other hand into his sweat-drenched hair.

His arms, legs, everything was sore and ached. There would be bruises, for sure.

She'd managed to land quite a few good hits on him. In all the years of his life, not one person had, up till this point. But for every nine of Mikasa's attacks that he had blocked, one managed to get through his defenses.

And that girl had inhumane strength

It's not natural, Levi thought, his eyes glancing over her lean stomach, and her muscled yet slim arms. Mikasa was built for her age, but not disproportionately so. She didn't have bulging biceps or manly shoulders.

And yet, her strength was disproportionate. Levi got that a lot about his strength (due to his height); but given Mikasa's gender and build, even if she had an eight-pack and was all muscle, she shouldn't be physically capable of packing punches with the tremendous amount of power she managed to inject in them.

There must be some reason, something to it...

Her pulse still beat against his fingers, and Levi felt something rough there, a roughness amidst her smooth skin.

He looked down, and saw that she had some kind of a bumpy scar on her wrist, from a previous injury or scar.

Upon closer look, he realized, feeling mildly horrified, that some sort of symbol had been cut into her flesh, probably years ago.

"No – no, please – let me go! Please, I'll do anything but don't – I'm married, I have a husband – don't make me-"

"Shut up wench!"

The beefy man struck the woman hard across her face.

Blood streamed out of her mouth, the bright red contrasting against her snowy skin. Her ebony hair fell across her face, and her dark eyes were bright with tears.

"Please-" she begged.

"One more word and we'll cut your tongue out! Not like you need it for what we're going to do with you!"

"Actually, from my experience, there's a good amount she might need it for!"

The men laughed loudly at the joke, and the woman whimpered, as they wrenched her hands forward.

"Levi, the cuffs!" one of them barked.

"Father – are you sure – this seems a bit – barbaric, don't you think?"

"Levi!" the man growled. "Do you want more beatings?"

"N-no sir!"

A young boy – not older than ten – rushed forwards, avoiding the woman's eyes as he clamped the metal around her left wrist, and then her right, noticing the strangely scraped symbol etched into her skin.

"That's a good boy, Levi!" one of the men smacked his head. "One day, when you're a few years older, we'll let you have a taste too, and once you go down that road there's no turning back!"

"N-no!"

Levi shook his head, realizing where he was, and noticing the girl lying unconscious on the floor.

"No… it's over. They're gone," he muttered, "Never again. Never again."

Humans can be monsters too, sometimes. Monsters worse than Titans. And the creator of those monsters is being praised as the destroyer of these. What irony.

He looked at Mikasa again, his gaze flickering between her face and her wrist.

She was pretty, very pretty, and there was certainly something exotic about her beauty. Her cheekbones were higher than most, and her dark eyes, though large, were slightly slanted. Her features too, there was a delicateness to them that wasn't seen in most woman, no matter how attractive.

Levi reached forward, slowly running his fingers through her hair. It was smooth and fine, like black silk.

It's not the first time…

He had felt that hair before, the same ebony black hair.

Could it be?

Levi's eyes lingered on her scar. From what he knew about Mikasa Ackerman, her parents had been murdered when she was nine. Eren Jaeger had saved her then (which probably accounted for her ridiculous attachment to the boy) and she had lived with him ever since, as an adopted sister of sorts.

Levi suddenly felt like vomiting, and he bought a hand to his mouth, restraining himself.

Fuck. If it's my fault...

He would train her till she surpassed him, Levi decided. He would train her into humanity's best soldier.

Not just for humanity, but for her own sake, and for his. For the sake of her parents, and all those innocent people who had died and suffered, years ago, at the cruel hands of other humans.

He felt oddly protective of the young girl, even though he knew she hated his guts.

And you'd probably hate me more, if you knew.

"Let's get you back to bed," Levi murmured, sliding his arms under her legs and around her shoulders.

He picked her up gently, despite his aching arms, and carried her out of the rooms and through the deserted halls.

As he rounded a corner, he nearly dropped Mikasa as he came face to face with one Eren Jaeger.

Eren's green eyes grew wide at the site of Levi carrying Mikasa in his arms.

"Mikasa – wh-what are you – what did you do to her?! Is she alright?!" Eren yelled, panicking.

"Keep your voice down, do you want to wake up the entire castle?" Levi snapped at him irritably. "Why the hell are you out of bed?"

"I needed to use the toilet, they let me out," Eren said. "Though that's not even important! What did you do to Mikasa?!"

"Nothing more than she couldn't handle. Keep your pants on Eren, she's only fainted from exhaustion. Here," Levi held her out to Eren.

"Wh-what?"

"Carry her back to her room will you, like a good brother or whatever you are. I have things to do."

And my arms are fucking killing me. That bitch punches hard.

Levi deposited the unconscious girl into Eren's arms.

"Down the hall, take a right. Third door to your left," he said, before walking off, leaving Eren staring after him in bafflement.


Eren shifted Mikasa in his arms, still staring after the Corporal. He was unsure to make of what he had just witnessed.

For one thing, Mikasa was unconscious. Even though Levi had said she had fainted out of exhaustion, it bothered Eren a great deal to see her unconscious.

There was a time when he would have relished the chance to be Mikasa's hero and carry her back to her bed (and maybe even now, a part of him liked the idea) – but after seeing her so insanely strong and always fighting the last few months, seeing her in this state filled him with a bit of unease.

It also bothered him how nonchalantly Levi had been carrying her, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. He also seemed to know where her bedroom was, something which Eren himself hadn't even known or bothered to find out.

For some reason, that also made Eren feel slightly sick, at the pit of his stomach.

First Jean, now Levi. There's something wrong with me. Why is this even bugging me, it's not important!

He walked along the dark passageway. Mikasa was heavy, but he managed. Her head rolled against his chest.

He'd carried her once – just once – when they had been kids, playing in the field. He'd picked her up then, in his arms, and had spun her around. He didn't remember why, but he remembered the sound of her laughter, and how soft and warm she'd been in his arms.

He hadn't heard her laugh in years.

She was still warm though, but not as soft as before. She was harder now, harder after years of training and 3DMGs. Eren had seen his own body in the mirror, seen how he'd developed abs and pectorals and biceps and muscles in places he'd never had them.

They had both grown, physically and mentally, teenagers forced into the roles and bodies of adults.

We're still together though, even after all these years. We made it, to the Scouting Legion. And now Mikasa's in the Special Operations Squad, though it's to protect me. Who would have thought…

Mikasa stirred in his arms, and Eren stopped walking.

"Hei-chou?" she asked weakly.

Eren's stomach curdled at that – was it out of habit, that Mikasa expected Levi? Had he carried her like this before?

"It's me," he said thickly. "Er-"

"Eren!" Mikasa gasped, her eyes snapping open. "How are you - how are you here?"

"You collapsed from training. Heichou asked me to take you to your bedroom."

"…oh," was all Mikasa said, and Eren started walking again.

"You can put me down," she said after a moment. "I think I can walk now."

"Don't be stupid, you'll just faint again," Eren snapped at her.

He would never admit to himself that he liked carrying her, liked having her so dependent on him.

"Alright," Mikasa agreed easily enough, settling back against his chest.

Her soft hair tickled his chin, and he could smell it; sweat, mixed with something flowery, something sweet, and something familiar that reminded him of the old days before the Titan attack, and of his mother.

He reached her room and kicked open the door. He leaned down and set her down on her bed. Mikasa sat up though, leaning against her pillows.

"You should – you should probably drink water," he said, filling a cup for her and sitting down on the edge of her bed.

He held the cup to her lips, and she drank it, her fingers momentarily covering his.

Their eyes met, and Eren felt his cheeks grow warm, though he couldn't for the life of him understand why.

"You – you smell like her," he finally said, taking the cup from her hands when she was finished drinking, placing it on the table besides her bed, "Like mother…"

Mikasa's eyes softened, but she said nothing.

Eren made to stand up, but Mikasa's fingers curled around his hand.

"What?"

"Stay – a bit?" she entreated him.

"You need to sleep, and I do too," he said.

"Just a little while? Till I fall asleep, please? I barely see you anymore..."

Her eyes were shining in the candlelight of her night lamp.

Eren found that he couldn't say no to her then. Besides, they hadn't gotten much quiet, peaceful time alone together at all, ever since… Eren couldn't remember the last time he had been alone with Mikasa and they hadn't been arguing or fighting or killing Titans or struggling to find food, or something of the sort.

"Okay," he relented.

Mikasa smiled at him then, and his heart lifted.

His eyes darted downwards, fully aware that she had yet to let go of his hand. Mikasa didn't seem to notice.

"Rough day?" Eren asked, wondering why his heart was hammering so.

I need to go back to bed soon, that's what it is.

"Mm. I always thought hand to hand was one of my strengths, but that shortie is better than me at everything, it seems."

Eren thought he sensed a bit of bitterness in her voice.

"He isn't called humanity's strongest soldier for nothing, you know."

"Hm… but you're stronger than him, when you're a Titan, right?"

I probably am, Eren thought, even though he's killed hundreds of Titans and claims he can kill me. I'm stronger than you too, Mikasa, aren't I?

His eyes flickered to her cheek, where he could make out the beginnings of a scar, from the time he'd attacked her during the battle to seal Trost.

"I still don't know if that power is a blessing or a curse," Eren muttered.

"It's a curse," Mikasa said, "But with you… I think… you'll make it a blessing…"

She was already drifting off to sleep.

"You must be really tired. You're always telling me to take rest, but now it's you who should," Eren scolded her gently.

Mikasa's eyes fluttered shut, her head falling back against the pillow.

Eren watched her sleep for a few moments, her face illuminated by the flickering firelight.

He felt his eyes grow heavy as well.

He considered for a moment getting into bed with her; it was something they had done often enough as children, sharing the same bed.

It had started when Eren had found Mikasa crying softly to herself one night, three days after her parent's murder. She had told him about her nightmares.

He'd hugged her then, and she'd fallen asleep in his arms.

After that, whenever she had nightmares, she would crawl into his bed. It was cramped, but Eren had never minded, and had often ended up using her as his personal body pillow. She had always been so soft, and smelled so good. Mikasa didn't seem to mind the cuddling either.

He shook his head, forcing himself awake. As tempting as the idea was, they were older now. They hadn't shared a bed in five years. Besides, Eren had heard what the guys in the bunkers, what Jean and the rest had said about sharing beds.

It had been innocent enough when they were kids, but Eren was pretty sure it would be looked at differently given that they were well into their teens. It probably wouldn't be appropriate, and Eren felt himself flush for having even entertained such an idea.

Still, imagining Jean's face if he had known they had slept on the same bed as kids - that was something that lifted Eren's spirits.

He took one last look at Mikasa, the firelight casting shadows against her skin. Just beneath her long eyelashes, at the curve of her cheekbone, was the scar, blemishing the pale, smooth skin underneath.

Eren's eyes were drawn to it, and he felt his stomach flip uncomfortably.

He reached out, brushing her hair behind her ear. It felt like silk the way it slipped through his fingers.

I did this to you. This is all my fault.

His finger traced the scar.

Jean's words echoed in his head, and the words in the courtroom.

In Titan form, Eren swung at Mikasa Ackerman three times…

I heard you tried to kill Mikasa… what the hell's with that, huh?!

Eren pulled his hand away from her face, as if scalded.

He hated it. It bothered him, so much, so much. Mikasa had never bought it up. She had never blamed him for it or even acted differently. She had even defended him in front of Jean for it.

But ever since the testimonial had been read out in the courtroom, it had stabbed at his heart.

You're the last person… I never, never wanted to hurt you… I'm so sorry…

"It won't happen again," Eren muttered, "I promise, Mikasa. Next time, I'll protect you, like I'm supposed to."

He stood up then, and walked out of the room, gently closing the door.

A few moments later, Mikasa smiled a tiny smile, wrapping her scarf closer around her.

"I know you will, Eren."


Heichou – Japanese word for the rank equivalent to Lance Corporal, it's what they call Levi in the anime/Japanese manga

Danchou – This would translate roughly to commander, what they call Irvin

Chibi - can mean a short person, Mikasa calls Levi this in the anime/Japanese manga


Omake/Deleted Scene (takes place when Jean tells Mikasa he needs to talk to her)

"Sooo…" Jean rubbed the back of his head awkwardly, twisting the material of his shirt together with his other hand. "Now that you got me here and alone… whaddya wanna talk about?"

"You bought me here," Mikasa deadpanned.

"Heh heh," Jean chuckled awkwardly. "Of course I did, isn't that right, smart of you to pick up on that, but you've always been so very smart haven't you Mikasa, smart and beautiful, now that's a combination that's rare to find, plus insanely strong too, you can have anybody's ass, I'd be glad to give you mine – I mean kick, kick anybody's ass… that's what I meant, because you're so strong, you know…"

Mikasa tilted her head slightly, dark eyes narrowing.

"You're not making any sense," she told him.

Jean frowned, though he shut his mouth for the moment.

"Jean?"

He looked up from the ground he had been staring at, meeting her eyes.

He felt his cheeks grow warm.

She had such beautiful eyes, dark and mysterious, like endless pools that he could drown into, if she let him. And her nose too, so perfectly shaped. She was more beautiful than any girl he had laid his eyes on, and her lips… those perfect, inviting lips...

"Wanna bang?!"

"Wh-what?!" Mikasa hissed, the beautiful eyes narrowing to slits.

Fuck, I did not just say that out loud…

Jean flushed red.

"I mean – just once! Or twice? Or as many times as you wanted really, all up to you, you can call it quits if you get bored – you know! It's really stressful around here, good way to release the stress once in awhile, heh, heh heh…"

"Jean!"

"Or you know, think of it as training! Yeah, training! We can even do it in the forest, or on a tree if that's how you like it, with our 3DMG's on, we can even use them-"

Mikasa's eyes blazed and she took a step towards him.

"You can even call me Eren if you like!" Jean practically squeaked out in a last desperate attempt, before her fist smashed into his face and he was sent flying backwards.


Eren wasn't quite sure why, but there was something extremely satisfying about seeing Mikasa punch Jean in the face.

That was as clear as a rejection could get, for one thing.

"Ouch!" Connie yelped sympathetically. "Damn, that's rough, even for Mikasa!"

"He probably deserved it, the creep," Eren muttered. "Who the hell does he think he is anyways?"

After Connie had explained Jean's longtime crush on Mikasa to Eren, he had felt the urge to punch the boy's face in himself. He and Jean had always been somewhat of rivals, but they had eventually developed a grudging friendship as well.

But at that moment, Eren had felt all feelings of friendship disappear, replaced by a sudden and inexplicable irritation.

"He probably said something stupid, Mikasa wouldn't punch him for asking her out," Armin agreed, glancing sideways at Eren.

Does Jean asking Mikasa out really bother you that much, Eren?


"Damnit Mikasa, when I thought you'd make my nose bleed, this is not the situation I had imagined!"

"Are you asking for another one?"

"No! No – fuck." Jean staggered to his feet, clutching his dripping nose. "You punch hard!"

"…sorry," Mikasa said evenly, though she didn't look particularly remorseful.

"No – no, I'm sorry, Mikasa. I had no right to talk like that, I didn't mean it, I swear. I was being a jerk."

She looked a little surprised at the swift apology.

"I didn't want to anger you. I actually wanted to talk about something else entirely, I just kind of got nervous and started talking crap… I get nervous a lot, around you."

"You don't need to be," Mikasa said.

"Easy for you to say," Jean mumbled, flushing.

"Well?" Mikasa asked.

"Well what."

"Did you have anything important to say? Or can I go?"

She's so cold, Jean thought, this is a girl who probably will break my heart if I fall too far.

But she could be warm too, he had seen that. Warm and loving and caring. It was just never directed at him.

Jean was overcome by that familiar burning jealousy and urge to punch Eren Jaeger in the face. Little did he know, a few meters away, said boy was harboring the same sentiments about him.


Author's Notes:

Well, I hope you enjoyed that! I know there wasn't much action as such in this chapter – I guess it was mostly an introductory/set the tone kind of chapter. I know I glossed over Mikasa and Levi's fight – I promise you there will be more of that to come later… and those darned Titans, of course, from chapter two onwards!

This is roughly set after the events of the manga. I'm not going to provide an explanation for Bertholdt, Reiner and the rest, because I can't come up with one good enough. So I'm basically leaving those characters out of the story. Let's just say somehow Irvin's trap succeeded and Mikasa could get Eren back and they escaped, and Bertholdt, Reiner, Ymir and Christa wen their separate ways. Of course, their paths will meet again, but that would happen after this story ends, so I don't need to write them in. I just feel I wouldn't be able to do those characters justice. I'm sorry if anyone was looking forward to them appearing in this story, but as of now, I don't see that happening.

Levi's backstory… well, before I get any bashing for this, Petra did mention that he had a rather notorious past as a criminal, though no details were provided. I'm sure some of you by now would have guessed what the deal with him is in this… I don't know whether people would want to interpret his interactions with Mikasa as LeviMika. I didn't quite plan them to be so, but I can see if people read them as such. I don't plan to write LeviMika into this (since we already have two guys who will be fighting over her) but if people really want me to, I wouldn't mind. Just because they would be so badass, and I love to write jealous!Eren.

And Jean… maybe I overdid the Jean. There's just something I love about Jean being madly in love with Mikasa. He will come back, there's a lot more planned for him. Mainly to torture Eren. Because I am evil and plan to torture Eren a LOT in this. There's enough jealous!Mikasa out there, time for some jealous!Eren. And angsty!Eren. Which you got a taste of in this chapter, but there will be more of later.

And yeah, I had to make up an OC. Raye is an OC (whose name and appearance I have pretty much ripped off of Raye Penber in Death Note because I love him), but the Keiji guy isn't, he appears in the manga according to SnK wiki. I may or may not kill the OCs, don't know yet, but they're not going to have much character development because I suck at that.

…and I totally turned Hanji into some sort of hentai fangirl. I am sorry if that offends anyone. I don't mean to offend anyone. I just can see her as the kind who acts like that, as a joke.

Well, that's that. I'm so sorry for this excessively long a/n.

I will try to get the next chapter up as soon as possible. In the meantime, if you want MikaEre smut, or angst, or childhood fluff (insert shameless self promotion here) check out my other four fics, all listed on my profile page!

Actually, check out these two fics too!

How to Train your Titan by sinovenator: Titan!Eren x Mikasa. Probably the kinkiest but best SnK smut of its kind in the fandom. A must read, if you're open minded enough for that kind of thing. But do be warned of the pairing. I read this at least five times (shame on me, I know) but it's just so well written, and this author has managed to pull off a crazy scenario so perfectly.

Sundrenched by Tealirium: I don't know what it is about this fic, but I also felt compelled to reread it multiple times. It was actually the Eren/Mikasa fanfiction moment that made me think 'stop procrastinating and get on with writing your own stuff!', and hence me finally coming out with this chapter. I just love the way Eren has been written in this and my heart probably fluttered ten times while reading it.

Please review. Love you all. Oh, and I just listened to Guren no Yumiya backwards. It is ridiculous how epic it sounds. This fandom is going to be the death of me, I swear. With all the Guren no Parodies, Shingeki no Moejin, all those MMDs… I just can't…